Pain and.. pain?

Finally I had time to update again! This is up a few days later than I intended but these first days of May has been a one big hassle. But that's all sorted now and I can concentrate on this story again.

Some of you wondered about Kevin and Jason's relationship; they wont be having sex together. As for Troy and Benton, they will back but I'm not sure when yet. I'm currently debating if I should make this story looooong or make a sequal... any thoughts??

Please read and review!



CHAPTER 30




“Now, you had some questions earlier. What exactly did you want to know?” Kevin asked and I rubbed my face against the stuffed toy in my arms.

“W-Who are the lady and the b-boy in the p-picture?” I asked carefully and braced myself incase he shoved me away again. The back of my head was still throbbing from banging into the headboard and I was sure there was a nasty bump in there too. But Kevin didn’t shove me away, just sighed heavily and continued to rub my back while answering.

“The lady is my wife, Christine and the little boy is my son, Daniel.”

I tensed and gnawed on my lower lip, gathering courage to ask my next question.

“They died in a car crash three years ago. A truck driver was drunk and ran over our Volvo. The car isn’t as safe as they advertize it to be.” Kevin answered my next question before I could ask it and I leaned against his chest heavily.

“I’m sorry.” I whispered and felt a hand in my hair.

“It’s not your fault, Jason.”

“Still.”

Fingers brushed through my hair until they found the bump and started to rub it gently.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Kevin sighed and I couldn’t help the small smile that curved my lips.

“It’s alright. I’m sorry. I was a bit aggressive.” I mumbled and enjoyed the way Kevin’s chest shook when he chuckled.

“A bit? That’s sugar coating it kiddo.” I could hear the smile in his voice and closed my eyes, enjoying his fingers that were still rubbing the sore spot on my head.

“Any more questions?” Kevin asked and I turned my head until I could press my nose against his shirt and breathe in his scent. It was calming.

“Why.. why do y-you work at the C-Cave?” I mumbled into his chest and a heavy silence fell over us. I was just about to apologize for asking when Kevin’s chest heaved in a deep sigh and his fingers that had stilled after my question started their rubbing motion again.

“I left the force after Chrissie and Danny died. I just couldn’t deal with it. I sold the house, the furniture, anything that reminded me of them and rented this place. I didn’t work for over two years, did some handiwork for neighbors and people I know for few bucks maybe but nothing fulltime, nothing that required commitment. Then I met a guy in a bar, got drunk with him and he mentioned that the club he was working at was hiring. So I went for an interview and got the job. I didn’t know at the time what was really going on behind closed doors in there. I only found out afterwards. And by then I was in the same boat as them. It’s ironic really; I got the job because I figured opening the door for drunken people was something that definitely didn’t require commitment and look where it landed me. I’ve taken work home with me.”

I tensed in his arms and tried to move away from him. I was just work for him. Kevin held on tighter and said. “You asked, I’m telling you. Don’t move. If I wouldn’t want you here you wouldn’t be here. I could have let the social workers pick you up already.” I stilled and tried to relax in his hold again, pressing my ear against his chest to hear it rumble when he spoke.

“Then I met Tristan, he reminded me of Danny and I couldn’t imagine my little boy working there. It took some time to get Tristan to trust me but when he did, all he talked about was this older boy that had been nice to him, helped him, taken care of him and how he missed him now that he had gone back home. How that other kid felt like an older brother to him. I thought that was fucked up. And then I got a job to pick up another snotty nosed kid for work. Tristan is like a different boy when you’re there, Jason. He doesn’t really smile when you’re not around, not the way that his eyes lit up too.”

“I miss him.” I mumbled and closed my eyes when tears forced their way down my already red cheeks again.

“He misses you too. He’s back now, since last week.” Kevin said and I felt like someone had just kicked me in the heart. No. I didn’t want Tristan to be back in that place. I buried my face in Kevin’s shirt again and hugged him with one skinny arm while the other held bunny.

“He’ll be alright, Jason. He won’t be there for a lot longer, I promise.” Kevin said and hugged me closer again. He couldn’t know that. Tristan had been at the club for months the first time around, no one knew how long he’d have to be there now.

“W-Why did you h-hate me in the b-beginning?” I asked with a whisper after managing to calm down a little and wiped my tears in Kevin’s shirt carefully.

“I didn’t hate you Jason.” The bouncer sighed and withdrew his hand from my hair. He must have felt my confusion since he continued. “I just didn’t know you. I didn’t want Tristan to get hurt and the kids at the Cave aren’t exactly nice to each other without any reason.”

“Neither are bouncers.” I mumbled under my breath and Kevin’s hold tightened on me.

“I had a reason, Jason. Just not the one you thought. I never wanted to fuck Tristan, or you. Anyway, things are about to change, the Cave is going to get shut down.” He said and I leaned away from him so I could see his face.

“W-What do you m-mean?”

“There’s going to be a police raid at the club tomorrow. They’re shutting it down.”

“W-What about y-you? W-Wont you g-get in t-trouble too?” I whispered and looked at him with tears in my eyes, my bottom lip trembling. Kevin gave me a sad smile and ran his hand through my hair, brushing the long locks away from my eyes.

“That can’t be avoided, kiddo. I should have done the right thing when I found out. It would have saved a lot of tears and pain for a lot of kids.” He said and paused for a moment before resting his chin on top of my head again. “It would have saved you from being raped.”

“It’s not y-your fault.”

“Yes, it is, Jason. It’s my fault as much it everyone else’s who’s involved in that business. But don’t you worry about me, alright? I’ll be fine. You need to sleep now so that fever goes down.”

“I feel better already. I’m not tired.” I mumbled and Kevin pushed me off his lap so he could get off the bed.

“Yeah, right. Head on the pillow and covers up to your ears, now!”

I paled and looked up. He had sounded angry but when I looked into his eyes, they were soft. I nodded carefully and managed a smile. Kevin left the room and I laid down, snuggling bunny under the covers. I heard the TV being turned on and imagined Kevin sitting on his couch with a beer bottle. I smiled at first but then remembered the picture on top of the mantle piece. His family. I frowned and pressed my nose against the stuffed toy against my chest. I couldn’t imagine loosing someone you loved. Loosing two of them at the same time.




An hour later I was still awake and judging by the TV noises coming from the livingroom, so was Kevin. I hesitated for a moment before crawling out of the bed and padding across the room to the door. Kevin was sitting on the couch, three empty beer bottles on the table before him and one unfinished tangling from his fingers.

“K-Kevin?” I asked carefully, not wanting to disturb him and sneaked closer. His head was leaning on his other arm and I thought that he was watching TV but walking closer I noticed that his eyes were closed. He was sleeping while sitting up. I smiled and went to pick up the empty bottles. Kevin was breathing evenly and I gnawed on my lower lip for a moment before taking the bottle from his lax fingers. I was surprised he hadn’t dropped it already.

I took the bottles to the kitchen and set them down on the counter with the other empty bottles before taking a look around. Dishes from dinner were stacked up in the sink unwashed and the wok pan on the stove still dirty. Without hesitation I turned on the water and started on the dishes. It was about time I started doing something around here. Kevin was spending so much money on me and I needed to pay him back somehow.

I was wiping the tables when a gruff voice from the doorway asked.

“What are you doing?”

I jumped and almost dropped the rag I had been wiping the tables with. “C-Cleaning?”

“Yeah, I can see that but why? It’s late and I thought I told you to sleep?”

“S-Sorry. I just.. I couldn’t and.. I.. I wanted to help.” I mumbled and turned when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

“Come on, back to bed. The kitchen can wait until morning.” Kevin said and pushed towards the bedroom.

“But.. I’m almost done.” I tried and got the rag yanked away from my hands.

“Bed.” Kevin grunted and pushed me forward with a hand on my neck. I obeyed and crawled on the bed slowly. Kevin picked up bunny and set it on my chest before pulling the covers up to my chin. “Now, stay in bed. No cleaning in the middle of the night. Damn, I never thought I’d have to tell some kid not to clean.” He grumbled under his breath and went to leave the bedroom.

“Kevin?” I asked carefully and hugged bunny under the blanket.

“Mmh?”

“How’s Tristan doing?” I asked quietly and Kevin smiled sadly.

“Not good, not bad. Just.. hanging in there like always. I’m working tomorrow, I’ll tell him you’re okay.”

“You’re working? What.. What about the r-raid?” I asked with a frown and Kevin sighed.

“Don’t worry about it Jason. Just sleep. I’m working evening shift tomorrow so we can do something in the morning if you’re feeling better, okay?” He said and I nodded carefully. “Good night kiddo.”

“Good night Kevin.” I replied with a small smile and curled up on my side when the man left the bedroom again. It didn’t take me long to fall asleep.




Next morning Kevin woke me up early and told me to shower while he made breakfast. When I got out of the shower, clean clothes had appeared on the bed and I put them on, feeling a little guilty. Kevin had the table set by the time I walked into the kitchen and he gave me a warm smile. We sat down to eat and Kevin asked.

“How’re you feeling? Feel feverish?”

“N-No. I’m good.” I mumbled and took a sip of my cold orange juice. Dad never bought juice, I hadn’t known it was so good. Kevin got half way up from his seat and reached over the table to touch me. I winced, not really sure what to expect and Kevin’s smile died on his lips.

“Jason, look at me.”

I shifted my eyes upwards nervously and glanced at his eyes before looking at his hand that was too close to my face for comfort. The hand touched my cheek and I looked at Kevin again. He didn’t look angry but I knew moods could change in a heartbeat. Even faster. The hand pressed against the left side of my face for a moment before moving to feel my forehead.

“You don’t feel warm anymore. That’s good.” Kevin said and pulled his hand away. “I won’t hit you Jason.” He said and sat back down.

“Y-You s-spanked m-me. A-At the C-Cave.” I whispered and stared at my unfinished plate unenthusiastically. My appetite was gone.

“Because you were fighting, like you weren’t in enough trouble already.” Kevin said and I clutched my fork tightly at the memory of the spanking. It had hurt so much. “I was a bit harsher than necessary but I apologized for that already, Jason.” I nodded and set my fork down before standing up.

“I’m s-sorry s-sir. I was stupid. I shouldn’t have been fighting. I got what I deserved.” I said quietly and scraped the rest of my breakfast in to the bin before rinsing my plate and grabbing the washing liquid. I heard Kevin stand up and felt my shoulders tense but didn’t move from the sink. A hand landed on my shoulder, making me jump slightly and Kevin turned me around. I kept my head down and stared at his chest. He was wearing a faded black t-shirt that read ‘The Ramones’ on it. A hand caught my chin and forced my head up. Kevin’s eyes had a hard edge on them and I shrunk before him.

“You did deserve the punishment Jason, but not to that extent. I apologized to you.”

“Yes, sir.” I said quietly and averted my eyes, not wanting to look at him.

“Damn it, Jason! Look at me!” Kevin growled and I snapped my eyes back to him. “You know why I spanked you at the Cave. That doesn’t mean that I’m about to smack you at any given chance. Stop being afraid of me.”

“I-I’m s-sorry s-s-s..”

“Call me ‘sir’ one more time, Jason and I’ll spank you again right now.” Kevin warned and I screwed my eyes tightly shut.

“I’m s-sorry. I’m s-sorry.”

“Maybe it’s time to call the social workers, get you placed in fostercare.” Kevin continued and let go of me with a sigh. I looked up quickly again and begged with tears in my eyes.

“N-No! P-Please, K-Kevin. Please d-don’t make me g-go.”

“Jason, you know they won’t let you stay with me. You know that. Not after tonight.” Kevin said and I looked down again. I guess he was right. After they’d find out that Kevin worked at the Cave, they wouldn’t let me stay with the man, they’d probably arrest him and put him in jail.

“I’m sorry. Just.. please, please Kevin. Let me stay. Please? I know they’re going to take me away but.. I don’t want to go yet.” I begged and Kevin looked at me with sad eyes for while before sighing.

“Alright, you can stay. I’ll ask Cody to come and keep you company tonight, okay?” He said and ruffled my hair slightly before stepping away. I tensed and rubbed my wet face with the sleeve of my sweater. I didn’t want Thomson here with me, I didn’t trust the detective but I didn’t want to argue with Kevin either.

“He’s not going to hurt you, Jason. You can trust him, he’s a cop.” Kevin said and I nodded quietly, turning to wash the dishes again. I heard Kevin move behind me and then an arm came around my side to set his plate in the sink as well.

“Finish the dishes and then we’ll do something like I promised, okay?” Kevin said and I glanced at him with a small smile.

“Okay.”