Strangers Paradise

Chapter 3.

~The heavens must really hate me I swear that stupid prep boy was in every class of mine every-single-freaken-one-of-them! But thank god he didn’t sit next to me in all of them. My instincts told me there was something not right about that kid. I’m messed up sure but that guy is just plain out strange. Like I usually do, he never really spoke much accept for this morning when he asked me to show him to the office. At least that’s what I thought from what I saw in my classes and at lunch. He sat at a table with a number of people trying to befriend him, mostly girls, and what does he do he just shrug’s them off?! I mean girls lots of them throwing themselves at him. It’s every guy’s fantasy to be in that situation he was in and he goes and ignores it. That guy is either crazy or gay it has to be one or the other I’m sure. `Cause no guy; no man would act like all he wanted was to be left alone in that type of luck. That’s when I startle myself. Why was I worrying over a complete stranger that l don’t even know? I mean I hardly worry over myself let alone anyone else. I must be losing my mind “yep that’s it!” I say to myself. I stop my train of thought then and realize that I’m in front of my door ‘wow I distracted myself and thought about that guy all the way to my house now that’s bizarre…I think.’ I take a deep breath and quietly walk in and just as quickly as I am I take off my shoes and tip toe my way up the stairs and to my room. ‘All right so far so good I made it to my room without running into my father or mother’. Relieved I enter making sure to lock the door behind me so they can’t get in, at least not without a struggle
and sit down on my bed. My room isn’t much but its better than not having a room at all. I have a computer desk right by the door, but no computer I can’t afford it, though it is a hard surface to do my homework on. It also held both my lamp and alarm clock and in one of its drawers it held my journal that I wrote all my poems, deepest of secrets, and thoughts that I had. My bed…really wasn’t a bed just two mattresses put together in one corner of my room. I don’t have a stereo or any posters up like any other teen just plain black walls and besides a small dresser with my clothes that’s about it. I stay there waiting for the rest of the night to pass. Later on about eight or so my stomach starts to growl as I realize how hungry I am, but I don’t want to run into my parents…I can’t risk that so I think of the next best thing. I walked over to my desk and yanked out the bottom drawer. Then I pulled out a piece of bread from a loaf I had hidden in it some peanut butter and my pocket knife. It may not have been very much but it was enough to keep my stomach happy for the moment. Then as I was done and had put it all away I was about to just go to bed when the door handle frantically started to rattle non-stop and a fist started to bang upon the locked door. My heart skipped a beat or two then started going at a top speed. I knew what was about to come and I was scared. The man behind the door started screaming at me to unlock it. I didn’t know what to do everything just started becoming dark and quiet all around while time stopped. My breathing started to hitch as I heard something start to pick the lock. I heard the click and the handle turned. The door swung open on its hinges harshly revealing my father on the other side. Petrified that was the only word I could think of to explain the terror I was feeling. I trembled as he entered and started to approach me he was really drunk again and as my mind raced to find an escape I noticed there was no where for me to run I was cornered. He raised his hand at me and made sure that it hit me right across my face, where he had slapped me earlier. Losing my balance I was about to fall to the floor when he grabbed me by my blonde hair and smashed his fist into my stomach. I felt as if I had lost my breath and clutched at my soon to be new bruise and curled up on the ground. But no it didn’t stop there. He started to kick at me after that anywhere his feet would hit me my face, legs, arms, and ribs which I’m afraid he may have broke one or two `cause` I heard a few snapping noises. Then thankfully it all suddenly stopped and the cold basterd walked out of my room slamming the door shut behind him and leaving me to bleed on the floor. I felt the warm wet tears form and fall from my eyes and once more I again asked myself why? I could taste my own blood in my mouth and the sting from my lip ‘it must be split’ I thought. Why are they like this? Why does he do this to me? Why does everyone hate me? And why am I here to begin with? I pick myself up off the wooden floor and not long after absentmindedly hear the car down below and the sound of my parent’s voices. They must be leaving, probably going back to the bar. Good
if I’m lucky since there so drunk maybe they’ll crash then die and leave me alone. That’s what I hoped, but I knew it was useless to hope for such a thing. Life never turns out the way you want it to. I was a mess and for now all I needed was to clean myself up. So I head for the bathroom and turn on the sink. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and take in my appearance this person that everyone hated and despised the most. Hell I even hated me. I looked like shit and I didn’t feel much different either. I can’t stand my reflection I’m so horrifying. No wonder people hate me, think I’m a freak, it’s because I am one. I take off my arm bands revealing all of the cuts from before and take out my knife that I had in my pocket. Placing it upon my skin warm liquid starts to flow down my arm as I start to count. One, two, three over and over again my mind replayed all the memories of what’s happened in my life. Four, five all the hate all the pain and all the beatings. Six, seven, eight all the betrayal I had felt that was all I went up to before I felt the sweet pain of my new wounds and then wrapped a cloth like bandage around them. I realized I was really tired from the day’s events and since my body already ached I found it very easy to return to my room and lie in bed falling fast asleep.