Tears

Chapter - Two

Last night was a bitch to get through. It was cold out and we have a window that doesn’t close all the way. Since we added a new member, that's one extra blanket I can't snag. When I woke up, I scratched my head. My hair was still blonde like the day I was born. I never understood why my hair was naturally this light. Both of my parents are full Japanese. I was thinking of dying it black one of these days. I get these weird stares from people I don’t even know. I got up and started walking through the floor of sleeping bodies. Chihiro, Himeko, and I are usually the ones that sleep on the ground. When there's drinking, we all seem to end up on the floor.


Near my foot was the sleeping black haired man, Jin. He looked rather peaceful under that light pink blanket. He took my favorite blanket. I know it sounds faggish, me sleeping with a big warm pink blanket. It’s the first blanket I used when I joined the gang. "Ey'." I whispered, crouching down as far as I could to his level. He didn’t move. I tried it again with a small push on his shoulder. He still didn’t move. Now I'm pissed! I got up and kicked him in the stomach. I know it sounds bad but at least I didn’t kick him in his naughty place. "AHH!!" He screamed, holding his stomach. "What the hell?!" I crossed my arms and scowled. I wasn’t amused with his tone. "You wouldn’t wake up. I had to do something. Now, quit yelling." He sat up rubbing his stomach. He didn’t look his best. "Why did you wake me up? I got a splitting headache!" he whispered. "It's not my fault you drank a little too much. I feel fine!"


That was a lie. My stomach was feeling a little uneasy and my head was pulsing. But to answer his question... "No reason. You were snoring. I wanted peace." Another lie. "Yeah. Sorry about that. People usually say that I snore like rocks in a blender." Are you kidding? The only noise you made since yesterday night was that scream that I kicked outta you! "So now that I'm awake," he sat next to me with that pink blanket around him. "What do you wanna do?" He asked that question while picking his fingernails. Gross. I really had no idea what to do. I have band practice today but that’s not till later. A gig in a couple days. Other than that, nothing much.


What? What the hell is that annoying racket? Banging? Someone's at the door? A gun shot! "Ren! It's the Blood Riot gang!" Ren jumped up from a dead sleep and looked at me. "Blood Riot? Shit!" He pulled his blanket off of him and ran to the game room yelling at his older brother. They both came running out with their Walther PPKs in their hands. At this time, everyone in this room was awake. Himeko ran out after the guys with her Hattori Hanzo next to her. I pulled out my P99, now on one knee next to Jin. I know it's rather weird to sleep with your gun on you but, I gotta be careful. "You're gonna fight too?" Jin asked. "I'm not in this gang for nothing." I ran out the door, leaving Jin, Daisuke, and Chihiro still in the house.


I was behind one of the tin trashcans, blocking the bullets that were flying my way. I filled my gun with a magazine and pointed. I couldn’t see anyone but the bullets still made sounds against the targets they were shot at. There! Someone! I shot my pistol as long as I could see him. Damn. Missed. Another guy's head! Wait? What's that? Himeko's Hattori Hanzo sword flew through the skull of our enemy. His brains splattering across the pavement as he fell to the ground. The Blood Riot Gang retreated screaming, "You're not getting the last of us, Pistols!" What kind of gang is that? Leaving your friend's dead body at the enemy's headquarters?


"Damn Blood Riots. They're always getting in the way," said Ren as he put his gun back in his pants. Himeko walked up to the dead bloody corpse, staring blankly at the form infront of her. She picked up her foot, stomped it on the man's throat and pulled out her sword in one quick movement. We all walked back into the headquarters. Once I got in, I saw Daisuke and Chihiro looking scared. Jin looked like a jackass like he didn’t know what the hell was going on. I saw as Daisuke ran into the arms of his lover, repeating the words, "Are you okay? Are you okay?." I knew Ichigo was fine. Well, at least I thought.


"The fuckers got a shot at me," Ichigo explained. Daisuke's concerned and worried face flashed on by the end of his sentence. "Oh my god! Where did they shoot you?" Ichigo was holding his left shoulder. He revealed the blood on his right hand, Daisuke gasped running away and coming back with something that looked like a first aid kit. Jin was now standing next to me, watching Daisuke pull out the bullet. It wasn’t as deep as the rest of Ichigo's bullet wounds in the past, but still pretty close. I was feeling a little uneasy having Jin so close, so I walked over to comfort Ichigo. Ichigo and I both have a long history together. When I turned eight-teen, we got matching black wings tattooed on our back. We've never exactly had sex but he was my first gay lover. I'm still experimenting with my sexuality. I never found myself getting too close to a girl. When I was around twelve years old, I started getting weird feelings when I was around attractive men. I never went to school after my parents died. Never liked boys in my class before that. Maybe it's trauma, but trauma cant turn you into a faggot can it?


When I started rubbing Ichigo's back, Daisuke looked at me funny. Did Ichigo tell Daisuke about our past? I let go of Ichigo and looked at him. He was staring at me like that the whole time? Staring at me with the twinkle in his eye? God, Kyoharu. Just let the paranoia go. When Daisuke was finished patching up Ichigo's arm, they both went into the game room. I knew what that meant, me and Ichigo would go there all the time. I don’t want to go into detail, but we had quite some times in there. Yelling? Why is there yelling coming from that room? After awhile of them fighting and screaming, I saw Ichigo storm out of the room. He pulled my by my wrist and dragged me into the bathroom. "Kyoharu, why did you have to rub my back? You know how jealous Dai gets when he sees us doing anything together." Ichigo crossed his arms, looking at me menacingly. He is acting like I whipped out his cock and shoved it in my mouth!


"I'm sorry that Daisuke doesn’t want me to show any kind of concern about you," I explained. For a guy who just got shot, he has a lot of guts trying to pick fights. Ichigo looked like he was taken back by my words. "You were worried?" It seems as if he is trying to feed off of my feelings for him. "Kinda, I guess." Ichigo flashed me a rare smile, and looked down. "I'm glad I could get some kind of emotion that showed that you cared."


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"I'm breaking up with you, Ichigo."
"What?"

That look of despair on Ichigo's face still haunts me. His whole body stood in silence and shock. His mouth hanging open ajar and his muscles clenched. We were standing in the field where we first kissed, the wind lightly blowing. Even though my hair was in my face, my expression was still a face of determination and great will. "We can't stay together, Ichigo. You can't love me." Yesterday was the dreaded day he told me he loved me. My heart skipped a beat in fear when he uttered those horrible words. Love is nothing but hurt and I'm never crying again. No one is more important than my deceased parents. "Kyoharu.... you can break my heart a million times but that wount stop me from loving you."


I felt like vomiting. His words were gooey and disgusting. I couldn’t take it. "Don't fucking say that! Are you an idiot!?"
"I'm an idiot for falling in love?"
"No. You're an idiot for falling in love with me!"
Ichigo went silent. He knew my words were true. Deep down at least. "I'm an idiot then," Ichigo replied. How dare he! "You cant love me! Get it through your fucking head!" I hated the fact that someone was in love with me. It made me want to scream on the top of my lungs till my I lost my voice. I had to lie to show him I don’t care. "You know what? I don’t give a shit if you love me or not. We are over." I sharply turned and ran away. I couldn’t stand seeing his gloomy face any longer. I already made up my mind! Quit trying to change my decision!


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"No!" I screamed. "I don’t care!" I pushed Ichigo out of the way and threw open the bathroom door, running out. I passed everyone in the living space and out the front door. Ichigo wasn’t following, and Im glad of that. I really need a smoke. I pulled out my pack of Black Jacks and pulled one out. I stuck the orangish colored filter between my lips and fiddled with the lighter. Flick. Flick. Flick. Fuck it! I threw the lighter at the brick wall and slumped down on the ground. My arms hugged around my knees and I sighed. Why am I such an emotional wreak? I heard the door creak open next to me. If its Ichigo I think I'm gonna fucking crack! "What is it you asshole!?!" I screamed, not even looking at the person. "Are you okay?" My eyes widened and I looked up. "Jin..."
"What happened?" he asked, scrunching down next to me. Why the hell does he think he can just ask me such a personal question like that? He doesn’t even know me! "I'm fine. You got a lighter?" He shook his head. I scoffed. I am ready to fucking jump off the edge if he ticks me off one more time. "Whats up with you and Ichigo?" That's it! "None of your fucking business!" I jumped up and screamed at him. "Why do you think you have the right to get into my personal life? It's not like you know me. I bet you don’t even remember my fucking name!"
"It's Kyoharu."
Why the hell did my heart just jump? No way! Im better not develop feelings for this guy! If I do, I think I'll fucking shoot myself! "Look. I am having a really bad day and I have practice at eleven." I crossed my arms, kicking at the gravel that rested under my bare feet. "Eleven you said? It's eleven forty five." Jin answered. How the hell did he know that? "Shit!" I exclaimed. The guys said if I was late again I was gonna stay late! Damn it all to hell! I ran off to the practice room without a wave goodbye to Jin.


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"Im so sorry Im late, guys! The Blood Riot Gang came over for a shootout." I exclaimed, opening the front door. They were all looking at me with not-so-very-amused faces. "What?" I asked innocently. "You know what!" Jouji said. Jouji was the leader of the band, and the back-up guitarist. He had bleached hair with his natural black hair showing at the roots, long and rather messy. He was wearing a yellow fitted An Café shirt with ripped faded blue jeans. There were chains coming from each of the three belts he was wearing. There were tons of bracelets hanging from his wrists and he was wearing a pair of red plaid creepers. "You know what I said the last time you were late! An hour of aftertim--" "I had an excuse this time, though!" Last time I was late I had no excuse at all. I was just being lazy. "We have a gig in a week. We don’t have the time for you to be late!" God! Jouji can bitch his way out of a paper bag! I swear. I looked to the couch and saw Kinkachi, the lead guitarist. He looked the most "gothic" out of all of us, as says the magazines. He had his natural black hair and it was spiked in all different directions. His bangs was in his face, almost covering his black eyes. His skin was a tan color. Like the color of a gramcracker or something. His whole outfit was black with zippers and chains and spikes on his shoulders. His belted boots came up to his knees and his gloves didn’t have fingers, showing off his gody rings. He has alot of piercings. Snake bites, on his upper lip, on his eyebrows, on his nose, on his tongue, 8 on each ear, and an "unspoken" piercing. He told me once that he was having urges he hasn’t experienced before. Gay urges that is. Im not sure if he still has them. I gotta ask him that sometime.


"I'll stay with you, Kyo-kun!" Powder exclaimed. A flamboyant gay with light blue hair, pink eyeshadow, and a pink bass with white hearts? Yup. That’s powder. His real name is Toukai but he thought it sounded.... not fabulous? He was wearing a pink fitted shirt with black hearts on it with a pair of dark blue jeans and a line of pearls hung on his side with his white pyramid studded belt. On his feet was a pair of white creepers with a pink star on the sides. He has been after me for a while but he would spread his legs for anyone. Besides, Im not the kind of guy who likes colorful dudes with lisps and sparkly pink lip gloss. "No thanks." Powder's smiley face turned to a big pouty one. "Aww, Kyo-kun! Why not?" He asked, stroking my chest. "Cause you wount practice with me, you'll just try to get in my pants!" True story. Powder pouted even more and sat on the couch with Kinkachi. "Where's Ryouken?" I asked. Ryouken is our red-orange haired drummer with the stamina of a pro-boxer. He could beat those drums for hours. "He left cause you were an HOUR AND A HALF LATE!!" "Okay, okay! Gosh." I slumped on the couch that was the opposite side as the other bandmates. "You know what?" Jouji stood up from the drum stool and grabbed his guitar case. " I think I'll leave too!" He yelled at me, slamming the door behind him.


"He on his period?" I asked, laughing slightly. Powder and Kinkachi looked at me with serious faces. "I think I'll leave too." Powder said, throwing his bass over his shoulder and skipped out the door. I looked away from the door and saw Kinkachi staring at me. I stared back. It was about 30 seconds of staring till Kinkachi finally asked, "Wanna get some coffee?" "Sure."


"And then when I finally ran to get to the practice room, it was about twelve. I ran the whole way there." I explained the whole story to Kinkachi with my Carmel latte in my hand. "Ichigo got shot? That sounds pretty bad." Kinkachi ordered an iced mocha. Everyone in the café were looking at us. Well, Kinkachi. When Kinkachi ordered, the workers all looked at him like he was the devil himself. Scared actually. Cant a person order a drink and sit down at a table without getting fucking glares for once? I really want Kinkachi to flip off that little girl but he's too kind to do that. He is all looks. Once, he offered to help an old lady with her groceries and she screamed as loud as she could. It's very sad how people are so closed minded these days. "So, you still have those "urges"?" Kinkachi nearly spit out his drink. "What?" He asked, wiping his mouth. "You know. Those sexual ones." I saw a slight blush on his cheeks. "Can't we talk about this another time? Like, maybe in a few years?" He whispered. "No! Tell me!" I felt like a fucking girl! I needed to know!


"Well..... I kinda have a guy crush but Im not sure how to tell him." Kinkachi has a crush? "Really? Do I know him?" He shook his head. "No. He's my roommate. Reito." Reito? I know that guy! He likes him!? "You mean that guy who was the leader of the baseball team, strait A student, and wishes to be a surgeon?" I couldn’t see them together. The high-class jock and a dark anti-social Goth.? That’s not exactly the best mixture. "He's a nice guy. He doesn’t treat me like everyone else."
"Yeah. Cause he's afraid he'd cast a spell on you."
"Shut up." Kinkachi looked the other way, sipping his coffee. I think I really hit a nerve. He looks hurt. "I'm sorry. I didn’t know it would bother you so much."
"Well, it did."
We didn’t talk for the rest of the day. Not even goodbye. When I came back, they were all the guys were drunk, again. It seems like Ichigo and Daisuke are done fighting. They're all over each other. I opened the door to the living space and closed it behind me. I heaved myself on the couch by the window, looking up into the ten o’clock night sky.


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What was with this light? I woke up on the couch I crashed on last night. I rubbed my red eyes and scratched my head. Where is everyone? I walked out of the room and into the living room. That's odd. When we drink, we usually.... Fuck! I ran out of the door and looked outside, pushing a magazine into my gun. I looked left and right, no one was there. No bullets flying off of the brick. No screaming obscene language. No blood or corpses splattered against the pavement. Something is odd about this picture..... but what? I pulled out my cellphone, flipping it open. I got a text message.


Kyo. If u r awake, plz go 2 Tonic. Well b there.

- Chihiro


Shit. I got all worked up about the Blood Riot gang being here and they went to a fucking bar. Aren’t they hung over by the drinking from yesterday? Oh well..... might as well.


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"That would be 1,500 yen, please." I took out my wallet, which was attached to my pants by three chains, and gave him the money. The taxi drove off and was greeted by the big sign on the front reading "TONIC". I walked up to the door and stepped through. There wasn’t as much people, but quite a few, considering it's the afternoon. I spotted the gang, even Chihiro, and walked over to them. "Why the hell are you guys here at this time of day?" I asked them, angrily. "Why are you so angry?" Ren asked cockily, drinking out of his third beer. I tightened my eyes. What an asshole. "Well, I woke up and nobody was here, so I thought something was happening!" After I finished yelling, everybody started laughing. Why the hell is everyone laughing?! It's not funny! "You are so uptight about the Blood Riot gang. Those pussies don’t have the guts to come by us again." Daisuke yawned. Yeah. This is coming from the guy who wasn’t in the gun fight yesterday. "Yeah. Lighten up and grab a drink." Ichigo smiled, his arm hanging over Daisuke. I sighed, sitting down and ordering a beer. A few seconds later, the bartender passed me my order and a bottle opener. I flicked the beer open and took a sip. I know I'm only 19 but the bartender is cool. He doesn’t ID.


A few hours into the day, and everyone seemed drunk. Not me though, I was still on my third beer. They just started on jello shots. I was sipping my beer when a pack of men spotted my eye. My eyes widened and I choked on my beer. "What's wrong, Kyoharu? Beer too strong for ya?" Ren giggled. I ran up to them and ordered for their attention. "The fucking Blood Riot gang is here!" I whispered. They all stat there on their stools, with shock written on their faces. My words seemed to sober them up. "Are you serious?" Chihiro asked. I nodded. "We gotta get outta here or else there’s gonna be a riot in the bar." I explained, pointing back to the door. "Hell no!" Ren yelled, getting off of his seat and looking strait into the face of the gang's leader, Korohachi. "We were here first and I aint leaving." Ren pulled out his pistol, ready to fire.


Korohachi smiled, malice dripping from his face. "Well, well, well, why isn’t it the Ass Fucking gang. What are you doing here. This isn’t a gay bar." Ichigo jumped off of his seat, pointing his gun to Korohachi's head. "Shut the fuck up!" Everyone in the Blood Riot gang pulled out their weapons. Some guns, some chains, some baseball bats. "I'm sorry, Strawberry. Did I hit a nerve?" Ichigo clenched his teeth, knowing it was him and Ren against the 7 guys. "You killed one of our guys, Ren. Now it's time for us to kill one of you." Korohachi explained, bumping Ren and getting in his face. "I don’t fucking think so, asshole!" Ren pushed Korohachi away and the brawl began.