To Find Love, Through Your Fears

I asked Michael to move in two months after our first time together. Since that night, making love became a usual and normal evening ritual for us. He agreed. It would take a month before he could move in.

I hadn\'t gone to work for 2 days, that first week, in the count down for Michael to move in. I hadn\'t been feeling well the past 2 weeks or so.

\" Ella, maybe you should go to a doctor.\" He said.

\" It\'s probably just the flu.\" I said.

\" Ella...please...just go to the doctor. I would feel a whole lot better if you went to the doctor.\" He said.

\" Ok.\" I said. \" Ok. You win.\" I called and set up an appointment for the next day.

\" I called the office. I\'m not leaving you alone today.\" He said. \" So you are going to stay in bed today.\"

\" Michael, I\'m not a baby. It\'s just a little flu bug or something.\" I said. \" I\'ve been taking care of myself--\" He cut me off.

\" Well you\'re not by yourself now.\" He said. \" Which brings me to another point.\"

\" And what would that be?\" I asked.

\" Marry me.\" He blurted out. I looked at him in shock. \" There\'s no hurry...it\'s just--\" I cut him off.

\" Yes. I will marry you.\" I said. He smiled. So did I. He held me in his arms. \" I love you.\"

\" I love you too.\" He said. Ok so we\'d been dating almost a year, and now we were engaged. The ring Michael had picked out was beautiful. Small but gorgeous. That night we laid on the couch. \" I\'m going to the doctors with you tomorrow.\" He said.

\" You\'re going to work tomorrow. And if possible I\'ll be at the office afterwords.\" I said.

\" I\'m going with you.\" He said.

\" No way.\" I laughed.

\" Yes way.\" He said. The next morning, he got up and got ready.

\" Go to work please.\" I said. \" Whether I come today or not, I\'ll come by and let you know what is said.\"

\" Ok, ok...you win.\" He sighed.

\" Thank you.\" I smiled. He left soon and went to work. I went to the doctor\'s office. Dr. Taylor did her examination, and ran some tests. \" So it\'s just the flu right?\"

\" Actually, no.\" She said. \" Although the symptoms are quite alike, it is not the flu.\" She paused. \" Miss Martinez is it possible that you could be pregnant?\"

\" Huh?\" I asked startled. \" Me? Pregnant?\"

\" I\'ve run a bunch of tests, and the results should be in soon, but there is nothing sickness relatedly wrong with you.\" She said. \" We\'re running a blood test, which will tell if you are or not.\"

\" This can\'t be happening.\" I said. \" I\'m 20 years old. I just got engaged...I can\'t be pregnant.\"

\" Dr. Taylor, the results. \" A nurse said, handing her a folder. Dr. Taylor looked over them.

\" Just as I thought.\" She said, quietly. \" Miss Martinez, Congratulations, you are close to 2 months pregnant.\"

\" What?\" I panicked. \" That isn\'t possible.\"

\" Is the father a danger to--\" I cut her off.

\" No. God no. Michael is an amazing person.\" I said. She went through the necessary procedures, and then I got ready and left. I went to the office to find Michael.

\" Hey Gabby, how are you feeling?\" Shelly asked.

\" Hi. A little better. Thanks. Have you seen Michael?\" I asked.

\" He\'s in his office.\" She said. I went into his office.

\" Hey baby.\" I said.

\" Hi Honey.\" He said. \" You ok? What did the doctor say?\"

\" Yeah I\'m fine.\" I said.

\" What did she say?\" He asked. I shut the office door.

\" About that...\" I said.

\" Ella is something wrong?\" He asked.

\" I\'m not sure.\" I said. \" Michael, baby...I\'m pregnant.\" I stayed silent to wait for his reaction.

\" Ella...\" He started.

\" I know that it wasn\'t planned, and I understand if you\'re--\" He cut me off, by wrapping his hands around my waist and kissed me. \" I completely understand if this is something you are not ready for...I understand, I mean the whole world feels like it has been turned upside down.\" Continuing after his kiss.

\" Ella...\" He said, softly. \" It\'s ok.\" I just kept rambling about how big of a step this was, and everything I could think of. \" Honey I know you\'re afraid...it\'s ok to be afraid, remember?\" I kept going, tears slowly rolling down my cheeks. \" It\'s ok to be scared, its ok to feel.\"

\" Everything has gone from slow and simply, to fast, and...and...\" I couldn\'t finish that. It wasn\'t hard. It wasn\'t complicated, but it wasn\'t easy either. He just listened quietly.

\" Ella, do you not want this baby?\" He asked.

\" Michael...\" I said. I did want a baby. I wanted to have his children, but I was scared. I\'d never had anyone to teach me any of this. How to be a mom, how to be a wife, how to simply just be a person, an adult, not some scared little girl.

\" It\'s ok if you don\'t.\" He said. \" I mean there are--\"

\" Michael, yes I want this baby. I\'m scared. Terrified, actually, and I don\'t know how to deal with it.\" I said. \" I\'m afraid of having a baby grow up the way I did.\"

\" Ella, do you think that we\'re going to--\" I cut him off.

\" God I hope not.\" I said. \" I don\'t know how to be a mom. Or how to be a wife, hell I\'m doing good figuring out how to be an adult.\" I said.

\" That\'s why we\'ll do this together.\" He said. \" You and me.\" He pulled me into his arms when I started crying. I couldn\'t help it. I truly was scared. He just held me. And truly that is all he had to do, and I felt safe. I felt like nothing could touch me as long as he was there. About 10 minutes later he looked at me softly. \" Stay here, I\'m going to go let everyone know that I\'m leaving. You are I are going home. You\'re going to go get some rest.\"

\" I\'m ok.\" I said. \" Really.\" I paused. \" I just freaked out, that\'s all.\"

\" I let you talk me out of the doctors appointment...no way are you talking me out of this.\" He said. He walked out into the hallway and I stayed in his office. He came back a few minutes later. \" Come on.\"

\" You really don\'t have to leave--\" He cut me off.

\" I want to.\" He said. We went back to the apartment. He sat on the couch with me. We sat there for quite awhile just talking. After that, I pulled Michael into the bathroom, and we took at hot bath together. He sat behind me, with his legs wrapped around me. \" I love you.\"

\" I love you too. And I am truly happy about the baby, and getting married.\" I said. \" Even if I am scared.\"

\" Just remember...\" He started.

\" It\'s ok to be afraid.\" We said in unison.



A/N~ Hey guys let me know what you think. This is the first time that I\'ve written an original story! I usually write about soap operas, or Harry Potter, so this is a big change...but I really like it! PLEASE READ AND REVIEW...