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Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
5
Views:
2,133
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
A Christmas Story
Christmas that year was the hardest time of my life. In a few moments, I watched my entire world come crashing down.
My siblings and I always stayed up until 12:01 on Christmas Eve because Rocco always wanted us to be the first thing he saw on Christmas Day. This year was no different. The three of us sat around the living room watching "A Christmas Story." Nicola sat on Rocco's lap with her head nestled under his chin. He held his arms tightly around her waist. She looked like she might be drifting off.
I sat on the opposite end of the couch with my knees pulled up to my chest and my arms wrapped around my legs. I hadn't slept in three days. Every night, when my father came in, I was in bed, staring at the ceiling in the dark. He would climb on top of me and do his business, and then he would roll off and leave the room. Afterwards, I would take a hot shower, then sit up in my bed for the rest of the night. The lack of sleep was starting to wear on me.
I dozed off for a moment, and woke up screaming when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I slapped it away and began kicking and screaming in terror.
"Stop it! Don't touch me! I can't take this anymore! Please! Please leave me alone! Don't do this to me!"
"Shh"¦Amby, it's all right." It was Rocco's voice. When my eyes came in to focus, I saw him standing over me.
"Rocco?" I'd never been so relieved in all my life. I looked around. He must've already taken Nicola to bed. Luckily, she didn't see it.
"It's me, Honey." He sat next to me. "What's wrong?"
He tried to hold me, but I jumped off of the couch. I couldn't let him touch me. I couldn't let anybody touch me"”especially not a man. He looked at me with concerned eyes.
"Ambra?" He stood and approached me. I help up my hand and backed away from him.
"Don't!" I told him. "Don't come any closer! Stay away from me!"
I turned and started to run from him, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back into his arms. At that moment, I lost all sense of reality. As soon as he had me in his grasp, I fought to get away from him. I balled up both of my fists and began to punch him. I tried my best and hardest to hurt him. The minute he put his hands on me, my eyes saw my father. My body felt eight years of physical and emotional torture. I experienced the first time with him and every time after it. In my mind, he was my father, and that made me want to kill him.
I threw punch after punch for what seemed like hours, physically letting out every emotion going through me, but Rocco's muscular frame withstood every blow to his person. When I finally tired of hitting him, I collapsed in his arms and broke down into tears. He held me up and kept his arms wrapped tightly around me. He wouldn't let me go, no matter how much I begged.
"Ambra!" he yelled as he tried to shake some sense into me. He leaned down to look me in my tear-filled eyes. "What is wrong with you!?"
I couldn't hide this from him any longer. I was tired of lying to him. I wasn't fine. I hadn't been "fine" in years, and I was tired of making everyone believe that I was. Rocco needed to know the truth. He was the only person who would believe me, and the only person who could help me.
He led me to the couch, then sat me down and knelt down in front of me. He held my hands in his and looked at me. They were rough, but not as rough as our father's. It didn't pain me to look at Rocco as it did to look at Arrigo. Rocco had grown into a beautiful man, and when I looked at him, I saw sanctuary.
"Please tell me, Ambra."
I took a deep breath, and I finally let it all out. "Dad raped me," I told him. It felt so strange to hear out loud. It had been over a year since it started, and I had never said it"”not once.
"He WHAT!?" Rocco's eyes filled with rage. I still believe that if my father had been there at that moment, Rocco would have killed him. "When!?"
"Since my birthday last year," I told him shamefully. "And he lets Albert do it, too."
Rocco stared at me in angry silence. I only hoped that he believed me. He pulled me to him and I threw my arms around his neck. I finally had someone to talk to. I had someone who cared about me. I had someone I knew I could rely on.
When I went to sleep that night, Rocco was in bed next to me. He lay next to me with his arms around me. He was angry when we went to bed. I was scared of what he and Arrigo would do to each other. I didn't think that fear would allow me to sleep, but the minute my head hit the pillow with the knowledge that Rocco was beside me I fell asleep.
I didn't hear my bedroom door open, and I didn't feel my father walk to my bed, but I did feel Rocco's body jerk angrily as he grabbed Arrigo's arm and shoved him to the floor when he reached for me in the dark. Arrigo hit the floor, and Rocco jumped out of bed. He let Arrigo stand up before he pushed him into the wall.
"What the hell?" Arrigo was stunned.
"You sick fuck!" Rocco yelled as he held his hand at Arrigo's throat. "That's your daughter!"
I sat up and knelt on my bed to watch. This was the moment I had been waiting for. My father would finally get what he deserved at the hands of my brother"”his flesh and blood, his only son.
"Did you think you could get away with it?" Rocco was so angry. All of his actions showed it. He put more pressure on Arrigo's neck. "You raped your daughter! You fucked your own child! I should kill you where you stand!"
He said everything I'd hope he would say. He was my Knight in Shining Armour. He had come to slay my dragon, and we would ride off into the sunset together. Rocco, Nicola, and I would escape the dark tower for a magical kingdom.
Then I heard the shot that made my heart stop.
It was muffled"”at close range. After I heard it, I watched them"”my father and my brother. Then, I witnessed Rocco's body convulse and fall to the floor. In that moment, my entire world came to an end.
When the police came, my father told them that it was an intruder. He forced me to lie to them. I told them that the three of us were asleep in Rocco's room when he heard someone in the house. I said he told us to stay in the room quietly while he took care of everything. The police bought it, because there were signs of a struggle. My father added that the intruder must've taken his gun from his room to avoid further suspicion that he was the culprit behind my brother's murder.
When I went back to bed, my father didn't touch me. He went into his room and passed out. Through all the commotion, Nicola hadn't woken up. I looked in on her before I went back to my own bedroom, sat on my bed, and wept.
The only person left who loved me. How could He? How could He take my brother from me? I will never forgive Him for this. He took away the only person who could've saved me. He didn't want to save me Himself, and He took away the only person who could"¦and on his birthday.
Rocco turned eighteen, and he never got to enjoy a sing thing about it. He was an angel. A savior"”my savior. He's gone, and the only thing I can selfishly think is"¦
What about me?
What do I do now?
Who will love me?
Who will take care of me?
Who will stop him now?
My siblings and I always stayed up until 12:01 on Christmas Eve because Rocco always wanted us to be the first thing he saw on Christmas Day. This year was no different. The three of us sat around the living room watching "A Christmas Story." Nicola sat on Rocco's lap with her head nestled under his chin. He held his arms tightly around her waist. She looked like she might be drifting off.
I sat on the opposite end of the couch with my knees pulled up to my chest and my arms wrapped around my legs. I hadn't slept in three days. Every night, when my father came in, I was in bed, staring at the ceiling in the dark. He would climb on top of me and do his business, and then he would roll off and leave the room. Afterwards, I would take a hot shower, then sit up in my bed for the rest of the night. The lack of sleep was starting to wear on me.
I dozed off for a moment, and woke up screaming when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I slapped it away and began kicking and screaming in terror.
"Stop it! Don't touch me! I can't take this anymore! Please! Please leave me alone! Don't do this to me!"
"Shh"¦Amby, it's all right." It was Rocco's voice. When my eyes came in to focus, I saw him standing over me.
"Rocco?" I'd never been so relieved in all my life. I looked around. He must've already taken Nicola to bed. Luckily, she didn't see it.
"It's me, Honey." He sat next to me. "What's wrong?"
He tried to hold me, but I jumped off of the couch. I couldn't let him touch me. I couldn't let anybody touch me"”especially not a man. He looked at me with concerned eyes.
"Ambra?" He stood and approached me. I help up my hand and backed away from him.
"Don't!" I told him. "Don't come any closer! Stay away from me!"
I turned and started to run from him, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back into his arms. At that moment, I lost all sense of reality. As soon as he had me in his grasp, I fought to get away from him. I balled up both of my fists and began to punch him. I tried my best and hardest to hurt him. The minute he put his hands on me, my eyes saw my father. My body felt eight years of physical and emotional torture. I experienced the first time with him and every time after it. In my mind, he was my father, and that made me want to kill him.
I threw punch after punch for what seemed like hours, physically letting out every emotion going through me, but Rocco's muscular frame withstood every blow to his person. When I finally tired of hitting him, I collapsed in his arms and broke down into tears. He held me up and kept his arms wrapped tightly around me. He wouldn't let me go, no matter how much I begged.
"Ambra!" he yelled as he tried to shake some sense into me. He leaned down to look me in my tear-filled eyes. "What is wrong with you!?"
I couldn't hide this from him any longer. I was tired of lying to him. I wasn't fine. I hadn't been "fine" in years, and I was tired of making everyone believe that I was. Rocco needed to know the truth. He was the only person who would believe me, and the only person who could help me.
He led me to the couch, then sat me down and knelt down in front of me. He held my hands in his and looked at me. They were rough, but not as rough as our father's. It didn't pain me to look at Rocco as it did to look at Arrigo. Rocco had grown into a beautiful man, and when I looked at him, I saw sanctuary.
"Please tell me, Ambra."
I took a deep breath, and I finally let it all out. "Dad raped me," I told him. It felt so strange to hear out loud. It had been over a year since it started, and I had never said it"”not once.
"He WHAT!?" Rocco's eyes filled with rage. I still believe that if my father had been there at that moment, Rocco would have killed him. "When!?"
"Since my birthday last year," I told him shamefully. "And he lets Albert do it, too."
Rocco stared at me in angry silence. I only hoped that he believed me. He pulled me to him and I threw my arms around his neck. I finally had someone to talk to. I had someone who cared about me. I had someone I knew I could rely on.
When I went to sleep that night, Rocco was in bed next to me. He lay next to me with his arms around me. He was angry when we went to bed. I was scared of what he and Arrigo would do to each other. I didn't think that fear would allow me to sleep, but the minute my head hit the pillow with the knowledge that Rocco was beside me I fell asleep.
I didn't hear my bedroom door open, and I didn't feel my father walk to my bed, but I did feel Rocco's body jerk angrily as he grabbed Arrigo's arm and shoved him to the floor when he reached for me in the dark. Arrigo hit the floor, and Rocco jumped out of bed. He let Arrigo stand up before he pushed him into the wall.
"What the hell?" Arrigo was stunned.
"You sick fuck!" Rocco yelled as he held his hand at Arrigo's throat. "That's your daughter!"
I sat up and knelt on my bed to watch. This was the moment I had been waiting for. My father would finally get what he deserved at the hands of my brother"”his flesh and blood, his only son.
"Did you think you could get away with it?" Rocco was so angry. All of his actions showed it. He put more pressure on Arrigo's neck. "You raped your daughter! You fucked your own child! I should kill you where you stand!"
He said everything I'd hope he would say. He was my Knight in Shining Armour. He had come to slay my dragon, and we would ride off into the sunset together. Rocco, Nicola, and I would escape the dark tower for a magical kingdom.
Then I heard the shot that made my heart stop.
It was muffled"”at close range. After I heard it, I watched them"”my father and my brother. Then, I witnessed Rocco's body convulse and fall to the floor. In that moment, my entire world came to an end.
When the police came, my father told them that it was an intruder. He forced me to lie to them. I told them that the three of us were asleep in Rocco's room when he heard someone in the house. I said he told us to stay in the room quietly while he took care of everything. The police bought it, because there were signs of a struggle. My father added that the intruder must've taken his gun from his room to avoid further suspicion that he was the culprit behind my brother's murder.
When I went back to bed, my father didn't touch me. He went into his room and passed out. Through all the commotion, Nicola hadn't woken up. I looked in on her before I went back to my own bedroom, sat on my bed, and wept.
The only person left who loved me. How could He? How could He take my brother from me? I will never forgive Him for this. He took away the only person who could've saved me. He didn't want to save me Himself, and He took away the only person who could"¦and on his birthday.
Rocco turned eighteen, and he never got to enjoy a sing thing about it. He was an angel. A savior"”my savior. He's gone, and the only thing I can selfishly think is"¦
What about me?
What do I do now?
Who will love me?
Who will take care of me?
Who will stop him now?