Take Me From This Pain, Brian's story
folder
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
39
Views:
8,701
Reviews:
80
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
39
Views:
8,701
Reviews:
80
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
I turn to you
Brian was in the middle of a complicated cooking recipe when the phone rang. Matt hadn't come home from school yet but the small blonde expected him any moment and he wanted dinner to be as ready as possible by then. He sighed and carefully replaced the cover on the cast iron pot before answering.
"Hello?"
"Bri?"
It was Kevin and his voice sounded pained, like it used to back in California when he had a fight, before Matt and Jason had taken them away from Gary. Brian's heart suddenly filled with dread and he turned the heat low on the pot before he sat down on a kitchen chair.
"Kev, what's wrong?"
"Why do you think something's wrong?"
"I know you, little brother. What happened?"
Kevin sighed through the phone line and shifted before he answered. "Look, promise me you'll keep calm."
"Calm?" Brian's heart began to pound as he settled himself further into the chair. The clicking of the front door signaled Matt's arrival. The tall blonde walked into the kitchen and gave Brian a curious look before sitting down in another kitchen chair quietly. "Kevin, if you don't tell me what happened I'll go out of my mind, now TALK."
Brian shifted over to Matt's lap and clung to him, fearing what he was to be told. Matt's arms locked protectively around him and the taller boy rested his chin on Brian's shoulder so he could hear Kevin, too. Matt figured Brian would protest if he didn't want that, but the small blonde only moved his head over closer to Matt's ear so they could both listen.
"I had a little problem today at school," Kevin started shakily. "With some guys who weren't . . . too happy with me and Jay."
"What do you mean?" Brian demanded forcefully, his protective instincts flaring up. "What guys?"
Kevin began to haltingly tell the horrific story and Brian's mind flew back to the days when Gary had made him do the very same things to him. It made him nauseous and he burrowed further into Matt for comfort. A tear fell from his eye as he listened to his brother's weak voice.
"How bad did you get hurt?" he finally asked when Kevin took a breath.
"Nothing's broken," his brother replied. "Ryan took me to the doctor while Jason was at practice. And before you ask, he didn't know what happened."
"I wasn't going to ask," Brian said. "I knew that or he would have been home with you."
"So sure, huh?" Kevin teased weakly.
"Positive. He and Matt are a lot alike."
"Are you okay, sweetie?" Matt whispered softly.
Brian turned to him and nodded, offering a small smile and a soft brush on the lips.
"How's Matt doing anyway?" Kevin asked, startling him.
"You really want to know?"
"Yeah."
"He's good," the small blonde said. "He's really loving college."
"Trent seems to, too," Kevin replied. "He called us last night to tell us all about his new roommate."
"Oh, Niko," Brian chuckled. "Yeah. Well, he needed a place to stay and Trent was nice enough to let him stay with him."
"Mmm," Kevin murmured. "I got the feeling Trent liked him a little more than that."
"Well, even if he does, he won't do anything about it. Niko just got away from a very abusive relationship. I think all he's trying to do now is go home to see his family in Greece."
"Geez, we're all a mess, aren't we?"
"I guess," Brian sighed. "Kev, do you want me to come stay with you for a while?"
He bit his lip even as he said it, knowing it would hurt to be away from Matt for any length of time. But this was his brother they were talking about and Kevin wasn't used to the kind of shame this type of abuse caused.
"No, thanks, Bri. I really appreciate the offer, but I have my own knight in shining armor to turn to now."
"Okay," Brian was relieved but also a little hurt.
"Hey, big brother," Kevin suddenly said. "I know you'll always be there for me. But I want you to stay with Matt."
"You do?"
"Yeah. You need him more than I need you right now," Kevin replied. "And I have Jay to comfort me."
"If you're sure."
"I'm sure," Kevin sighed.
--------------------------------------
"Let me finish cooking, baby," Matt said when Brian hung up the phone.
"No, no!" Brian protested hopping up to resume the flame on the pot and stir its contents. He wanted to take care of Matt and making dinner was one way he felt like he was doing that. "I'm okay. Really."
"You don't have to be perfect," Matt smiled gently at him. "I know you like to take care of me. I like to take care of you, too."
"I know," Brian smiled. "But you already take care of me in so many ways. This is something small that I can do for you."
"What?" Matt asked as he sidled up behind Brian and wrapped his arms about his small waist. "Feed me?"
"Mmm hmmm."
"But do you really like cooking?"
"I love to cook!" Brian exclaimed as he returned the lid to the pot. "It's like writing to me. It's creating something." He turned in Matt's embrace to reach up and wrap his arms around his neck. "And I love making good food for you to eat. You do like it, right?"
"Are you kidding?" Matt grinned crazily down at him. "You dazzle me every time. What are we having tonight, Precious?"
Matt felt the electricity course down Brian's spine and smiled broader. He loved having that effect on his baby and knew the nickname worked every time.
"Paella," Brian grinned back. "With fresh clams that I found today at the fish market down the street!"
He looked so excited Matt couldn't help kissing his nose.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked seriously. "I know what happened to Kevin must be quite a shock."
"Oh, it was," Brian frowned deeply. "I couldn't help but think about . . ."
"I thought so," Matt whispered as he gathered his boyfriend into his arms and squeezed tightly. "It's never far from your mind, baby."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. It's only natural."
"I love you, Matt."
"I know you do, baby. I love you, too."
--------------------------------------
"Hey, Jay," Matt said later into his cell phone while Brian took a bath. "How are you doing with all this?"
"Matt," Jason mumbled. "I'm doing shitty, but thanks for asking. I'm just worried about him."
"I can only imagine how you're feeling," Matt replied. "That's why I wanted to call when Brian was in the bathroom."
"Kevin's asleep," Jason sighed. "I didn't know if he would be able to, but the painkillers they gave him knocked him out."
"Well, that's a mixed blessing, I guess."
"Yeah. I wish I was there for him when it happened though," Jason said darkly. "I would have really given those assholes something to cry about."
"I'll bet. I don't blame you at all."
Matt thought about when he had gotten his hands on Darren Williams after Brian's attack. Only Brian's presence stopped him from killing the guy. He didn't even feel guilty about how badly he'd messed up Darren's knee either. Served him right to have his lacrosse career stunted after what he did.
I know you do," Jason replied. "Hey, your friend Ryan really came through for us today."
"Ryan did?"
"Yeah. He's fit pretty neatly into the group here."
"Well, that's good to hear." Matt felt a little jealous but he knew he had no reason to feel that way.
Ryan would always be his best friend, and it wasn't like he and Trent weren't doing the same thing over in Boston. He didn't know what Brian would have done if Trent hadn't been able to house Niko, as the Greek boy adamantly refused to stay with them because he thought he would be in the way.
"Kevin won't let me quit the team to protect him, so Ryan's going to play bodyguard while I practice."
"Who came up with that idea?" Matt asked curiously, even though he suspected he already knew.
"Ryan," Jason said in irritation. "And he convinced Kevin of it before I even got home."
"Yeah, that sounds like him."
"Any idea what's going on with him, Matt?"
Matt sighed to himself. He honestly didn't really know. He could only guess that Ryan was feeling the same remorse he was and wanted to make things up to Kevin. But he knew things ran deeper than that. He just didn't know how to approach that subject with his best friend yet.
"I think he still feels bad for what he and I did to them before we met you," Matt said. "But I can't be sure."
"I think it's more than that," Jason said evenly. "Much more."
"What are you saying?" Matt asked his ire suddenly growing.
"Easy, tiger, I'm not accusing him of anything," Jason chuckled. "We're friends now, remember?"
"Yeah," Matt sat back grudgingly.
"Remember back when you first thought you might not be straight?" Jason asked quietly. "I sure do. It was a pretty scary and lonely time."
Matt grunted to himself. He was thinking the same thing. But trust Jason to figure it out so easily when he barely knew Ryan.
"How do I bring that up when I see him?" Matt wondered aloud.
"You know you can't," Jason replied simply. "You have to wait for him to come to you."
"You're not afraid he's attracted to Kev, are you?"
"No," Jason chuckled again. "Kevin's not really his type."
"Well, I didn't get the feeling he was after Brian."
"Oh, he's not," Jason assured him. "I get the feeling he thinks of him as a little brother. That's the way he's treating Kevin, too."
"Then who?"
"Don't know if there is a WHO yet," Jason sighed. "I just get a feeling he's struggling with something, and he seems to want to spend a lot of time with me and Kev. Like we remind him of you and Brian."
"That might not mean anything."
"You're right," Jason conceded. "Like I said, I just get a feeling."
"Hello?"
"Bri?"
It was Kevin and his voice sounded pained, like it used to back in California when he had a fight, before Matt and Jason had taken them away from Gary. Brian's heart suddenly filled with dread and he turned the heat low on the pot before he sat down on a kitchen chair.
"Kev, what's wrong?"
"Why do you think something's wrong?"
"I know you, little brother. What happened?"
Kevin sighed through the phone line and shifted before he answered. "Look, promise me you'll keep calm."
"Calm?" Brian's heart began to pound as he settled himself further into the chair. The clicking of the front door signaled Matt's arrival. The tall blonde walked into the kitchen and gave Brian a curious look before sitting down in another kitchen chair quietly. "Kevin, if you don't tell me what happened I'll go out of my mind, now TALK."
Brian shifted over to Matt's lap and clung to him, fearing what he was to be told. Matt's arms locked protectively around him and the taller boy rested his chin on Brian's shoulder so he could hear Kevin, too. Matt figured Brian would protest if he didn't want that, but the small blonde only moved his head over closer to Matt's ear so they could both listen.
"I had a little problem today at school," Kevin started shakily. "With some guys who weren't . . . too happy with me and Jay."
"What do you mean?" Brian demanded forcefully, his protective instincts flaring up. "What guys?"
Kevin began to haltingly tell the horrific story and Brian's mind flew back to the days when Gary had made him do the very same things to him. It made him nauseous and he burrowed further into Matt for comfort. A tear fell from his eye as he listened to his brother's weak voice.
"How bad did you get hurt?" he finally asked when Kevin took a breath.
"Nothing's broken," his brother replied. "Ryan took me to the doctor while Jason was at practice. And before you ask, he didn't know what happened."
"I wasn't going to ask," Brian said. "I knew that or he would have been home with you."
"So sure, huh?" Kevin teased weakly.
"Positive. He and Matt are a lot alike."
"Are you okay, sweetie?" Matt whispered softly.
Brian turned to him and nodded, offering a small smile and a soft brush on the lips.
"How's Matt doing anyway?" Kevin asked, startling him.
"You really want to know?"
"Yeah."
"He's good," the small blonde said. "He's really loving college."
"Trent seems to, too," Kevin replied. "He called us last night to tell us all about his new roommate."
"Oh, Niko," Brian chuckled. "Yeah. Well, he needed a place to stay and Trent was nice enough to let him stay with him."
"Mmm," Kevin murmured. "I got the feeling Trent liked him a little more than that."
"Well, even if he does, he won't do anything about it. Niko just got away from a very abusive relationship. I think all he's trying to do now is go home to see his family in Greece."
"Geez, we're all a mess, aren't we?"
"I guess," Brian sighed. "Kev, do you want me to come stay with you for a while?"
He bit his lip even as he said it, knowing it would hurt to be away from Matt for any length of time. But this was his brother they were talking about and Kevin wasn't used to the kind of shame this type of abuse caused.
"No, thanks, Bri. I really appreciate the offer, but I have my own knight in shining armor to turn to now."
"Okay," Brian was relieved but also a little hurt.
"Hey, big brother," Kevin suddenly said. "I know you'll always be there for me. But I want you to stay with Matt."
"You do?"
"Yeah. You need him more than I need you right now," Kevin replied. "And I have Jay to comfort me."
"If you're sure."
"I'm sure," Kevin sighed.
--------------------------------------
"Let me finish cooking, baby," Matt said when Brian hung up the phone.
"No, no!" Brian protested hopping up to resume the flame on the pot and stir its contents. He wanted to take care of Matt and making dinner was one way he felt like he was doing that. "I'm okay. Really."
"You don't have to be perfect," Matt smiled gently at him. "I know you like to take care of me. I like to take care of you, too."
"I know," Brian smiled. "But you already take care of me in so many ways. This is something small that I can do for you."
"What?" Matt asked as he sidled up behind Brian and wrapped his arms about his small waist. "Feed me?"
"Mmm hmmm."
"But do you really like cooking?"
"I love to cook!" Brian exclaimed as he returned the lid to the pot. "It's like writing to me. It's creating something." He turned in Matt's embrace to reach up and wrap his arms around his neck. "And I love making good food for you to eat. You do like it, right?"
"Are you kidding?" Matt grinned crazily down at him. "You dazzle me every time. What are we having tonight, Precious?"
Matt felt the electricity course down Brian's spine and smiled broader. He loved having that effect on his baby and knew the nickname worked every time.
"Paella," Brian grinned back. "With fresh clams that I found today at the fish market down the street!"
He looked so excited Matt couldn't help kissing his nose.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked seriously. "I know what happened to Kevin must be quite a shock."
"Oh, it was," Brian frowned deeply. "I couldn't help but think about . . ."
"I thought so," Matt whispered as he gathered his boyfriend into his arms and squeezed tightly. "It's never far from your mind, baby."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. It's only natural."
"I love you, Matt."
"I know you do, baby. I love you, too."
--------------------------------------
"Hey, Jay," Matt said later into his cell phone while Brian took a bath. "How are you doing with all this?"
"Matt," Jason mumbled. "I'm doing shitty, but thanks for asking. I'm just worried about him."
"I can only imagine how you're feeling," Matt replied. "That's why I wanted to call when Brian was in the bathroom."
"Kevin's asleep," Jason sighed. "I didn't know if he would be able to, but the painkillers they gave him knocked him out."
"Well, that's a mixed blessing, I guess."
"Yeah. I wish I was there for him when it happened though," Jason said darkly. "I would have really given those assholes something to cry about."
"I'll bet. I don't blame you at all."
Matt thought about when he had gotten his hands on Darren Williams after Brian's attack. Only Brian's presence stopped him from killing the guy. He didn't even feel guilty about how badly he'd messed up Darren's knee either. Served him right to have his lacrosse career stunted after what he did.
I know you do," Jason replied. "Hey, your friend Ryan really came through for us today."
"Ryan did?"
"Yeah. He's fit pretty neatly into the group here."
"Well, that's good to hear." Matt felt a little jealous but he knew he had no reason to feel that way.
Ryan would always be his best friend, and it wasn't like he and Trent weren't doing the same thing over in Boston. He didn't know what Brian would have done if Trent hadn't been able to house Niko, as the Greek boy adamantly refused to stay with them because he thought he would be in the way.
"Kevin won't let me quit the team to protect him, so Ryan's going to play bodyguard while I practice."
"Who came up with that idea?" Matt asked curiously, even though he suspected he already knew.
"Ryan," Jason said in irritation. "And he convinced Kevin of it before I even got home."
"Yeah, that sounds like him."
"Any idea what's going on with him, Matt?"
Matt sighed to himself. He honestly didn't really know. He could only guess that Ryan was feeling the same remorse he was and wanted to make things up to Kevin. But he knew things ran deeper than that. He just didn't know how to approach that subject with his best friend yet.
"I think he still feels bad for what he and I did to them before we met you," Matt said. "But I can't be sure."
"I think it's more than that," Jason said evenly. "Much more."
"What are you saying?" Matt asked his ire suddenly growing.
"Easy, tiger, I'm not accusing him of anything," Jason chuckled. "We're friends now, remember?"
"Yeah," Matt sat back grudgingly.
"Remember back when you first thought you might not be straight?" Jason asked quietly. "I sure do. It was a pretty scary and lonely time."
Matt grunted to himself. He was thinking the same thing. But trust Jason to figure it out so easily when he barely knew Ryan.
"How do I bring that up when I see him?" Matt wondered aloud.
"You know you can't," Jason replied simply. "You have to wait for him to come to you."
"You're not afraid he's attracted to Kev, are you?"
"No," Jason chuckled again. "Kevin's not really his type."
"Well, I didn't get the feeling he was after Brian."
"Oh, he's not," Jason assured him. "I get the feeling he thinks of him as a little brother. That's the way he's treating Kevin, too."
"Then who?"
"Don't know if there is a WHO yet," Jason sighed. "I just get a feeling he's struggling with something, and he seems to want to spend a lot of time with me and Kev. Like we remind him of you and Brian."
"That might not mean anything."
"You're right," Jason conceded. "Like I said, I just get a feeling."