Pain and.. pain?

An update!

I had the ending of this story figured out, or so I thought. Now I dont know what the hell is going on and the story seems to be getting out of control. As it turns out, there's not that many chapters left on this story, or there'll be lots:D I have no idea really.

I'm still sick and holiday is over so I'm back to school but I'll try to find time and energy to write anyway. I have been thinking about my other story (Nemo) a lot lately too and will be continuing with that once this one is done.

Hope you like it and please REVIEW as always:) You make my day.


CHAPTER 27




I woke up in Kevin’s arms. My head lolled backwards over his arm that was draped behind my shoulders and Kevin shifted his arm so it supported my head better.

“Jason?”

“W-Where a-are we?” I whispered quietly and tried to look around but my vision seemed blurry. Kevin was carrying me along a long hallway bridal style.

“At my place. We need to get you in dry clothes and warmed up.” Kevin said and stopped in front of one door. He set me on my feet but kept an arm around me to hold me up while fishing his key from his pocket and opening the door. He picked me up again and I looked around in the apartment. It was a bit messy, not dirty, just stuff lying around. It felt like Kevin. I closed my eyes again when Kevin lowered me on the couch and pulled a fleece blanket over me.

“Hold on a minute.” He said and disappeared somewhere. I didn’t care to be honest, just pulled the blanket I had gotten in the car and the fleece blanket tighter around myself, ready to sleep. I was almost asleep again when Kevin came back to pick me and flinched violently when he touched me. My heart was racing in my chest and I wrenched my eyes open, staring at him with wide eyes. When it sunk in that it was Kevin, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes again.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” Kevin murmured and picked me up. He carried me to the bathroom like so many times before at the Cave and set me down on the floor gently. “Can you get undressed?” He asked and I nodded tiredly even though I didn’t feel like I could. He had already done so much for me and I didn’t want to make him angry. Kevin watched by for a moment how I tried to free myself from the soggy clothing before giving me a sad smile and starting to help me. If I hadn’t felt so worn out, I was sure I would have blushed crimson red but now I just lay back on the floor, closing my eyes. Kevin had seen me naked before, he had seen me in bondage, he had prepared me work, there was no reason for embarrassment.

I kept my eyes closed when Kevin picked me up but wrenched them open with a gasp when he lowered me in bathwater that felt icy cold.

“Nngh!”

“Ssh, it feels cold because your fever is high. It’ll feel better in a minute.” Kevin hushed me and forced me into the tub. He moved his hand to my neck and rubbed it gently while picking up the shower head and starting to rinse me.

“Jason, tell me what happened?” Kevin asked while washing my hair and I leaned against the side of the tub in exhaustion.

“I ran.” I whispered barely audible and couldn’t stop the tears from escaping my eyes once again. Kevin was quiet and I felt a weight settle on my chest. He didn’t approve of me running away, he was going to take me back. I brought my arms around myself in a hug when a violent sob rocked my body.

“I-I’m s-sorry, K-Kevin. I.. I d-don’t w-want to g-go back. Pl-Please d-don’t take me b-back.” I sobbed and looked up with pleading eyes. “Please. I’ll do w-what ever you want. I’ll be yours. I won’t fight you, I promise. I promise.” I continued with a whisper and set my hand on his thigh.

Kevin grabbed my hand and moved it away from his thigh quickly. “You’re not going anywhere for now, kid, calm down.” He said and I closed my eyes again, tears still flowing.

“P-Please don’t c-call me that. P-Please.” I pleaded quietly and Kevin started rinsing the shampoo out of my hair.

“Why?”

“He.. He calls me t-that.” I whispered and Kevin tilted my head back so he could see my face.

“Who?”

“J-Jonathan.” I said quietly like I was telling him something horrendous and looked down at the bathwater. Kevin gave me a simple nod and continued rinsing me. I could feel his gaze running over my bruised skinny form and closed my eyes.

“I’m sorry.” I whispered again and Kevin sighed.

“For what? For getting hurt? It’s not your fault Jason.”

“For being trouble.”

“You’re not trouble. Come on, time to get you out of the tub.” Kevin said and pulled his shirt off before reaching into the water with both arms and lifting me upwards. A light blush spread over my cheeks when I felt his warm naked skin against mine and hung my head forward to hide it. Kevin wrapped me in a big towel that felt softer than anything I had felt before and carried me to the bedroom.

He set me on the bed and turned to rummage through his closet while I pulled the towel up to my face, rubbing my cheek against the softness. Kevin turned back around, a pair of blue PJs that were way too big for me and a t-shirt in his hand and stilled when he saw what I was doing. He approached me slowly and helped me get dressed. I let got of the soft towel reluctantly and watched how Kevin hung it to dry over the wardrobe door. Kevin turned around again and pulled the covers aside motioning me to get in.

“I.. I c-cant take your b-bed. I c-can s-sleep on the c-couch.” I mumbled not feeling comfortable in his bed and Kevin huffed with familiar irritation evident in his face.

“You’re sick, get in.” He snapped and I moved quickly so that he could tuck me in. My heart was pounding hard in my chest and I stared at Kevin with frightened eyes. Kevin sighed and pulled the covers over me, moving to sit down on the bed.

“I’m not angry at you, Jason. You need to sleep to get the fever down and then we need to talk.” He said and brushed my wet hair out of my eyes. “Sleep, okay? I’ll be on the couch if you need something.” I nodded timidly and Kevin got up. I watched him go and curled up on my side, trying to sleep.

I couldn’t sleep. The sheets smelled like Kevin and the bed felt foreign under me. I stared at the room for a long time, still not sure if calling Kevin had been a smart move. I didn’t know if I could trust him. My eyes hit the towel hanging from the door and I hesitated for a moment before glancing nervously towards the open bedroom door and crawling out of the bed. I pulled the towel down from the door and returned to the bed, pulling the covers to the floor and wrapping myself in them while hugging the soft towel close. It was damp but I didn’t care. I fell asleep with my face pressed against the soft fabric.



I slept for hours, the fever making my sleep restless and kept pushing the comforter away one minute and pulling it closer the next. I was still feeling exhausted when I woke up in the feeling of someone touching my forehead. I opened my eyes halfway and saw Kevin.

“You really need to learn how to sleep on a bed, Jason.” He said with a small smile and moved his hand to my neck.

“I-I’m s-sorry.” I whispered with a raspy voice and Kevin sighed.

“Stop apologizing. Time to eat, I made dinner.” He said and pulled me to sit up. Just now Kevin noticed the towel I was still clutching in my hand and frowned. I looked down quickly and let go of the towel like it burned me.

“I-I’m s-sorry.” I apologized again and Kevin huffed in his familiar way. I felt a smile curve my lips slightly and let my head rest against his chest. It was nice to hear him huff and puff at me again. My smile froze when I realized that I had actually… missed? Kevin.

Kevin set me down on a kitchen chair and I shivered from cold. Kevin took notice and got the fleece blanket from the livingroom for me.

“T-Thank you.” I mumbled quietly and Kevin ruffled my hair briefly before setting a plate in front of me. It was chicken pasta and my stomach gave a twitch. I picked up the fork and dug in eagerly. I was so hungry, I didn’t care that it was chicken. I would have eaten dirt right at that moment. Kevin chuckled lightly and took a seat opposite me, picking up his own fork. The food was delicious but I couldn’t really taste it, I was in too much hurry to shovel it down my throat as fast as possible.

“Hey, slow down!” Kevin said and I pulled my plate closer, afraid that he’d take it away from me. Kevin’s eyes darkened when he watched me eat and I kept my head down, too afraid to look at him. My stomach was getting full but I forced myself to finish the whole portion before setting the fork down and staring at the empty plate, breathing hard. I didn’t want to look at Kevin; I knew he was disgusted with me.

“S-Sorry.” I mumbled and fiddled with the hem of my shirt nervously.

“Never apologize for being hungry, Jason. Are you ready to tell me what happened?” Kevin asked, eating slowly and I hunched my shoulders.

“I ran.”

“What happened before you ran, Jason?” Kevin asked and I felt tears in my eyes. I didn’t want to tell him. “Jason, you’ve lost a lot of weight, you have bruises all over your body and somebody fucked you. What happened?” He continued and I looked up when he said someone had fucked me.

“I’ve seen kids getting fucked enough to know what happened, Jason, don’t lie to me.” Kevin said in a firm tone and I hung my head again.

“I’m, s-sorry.”

“Tell me, Jason.” Kevin demanded and I gnawed on my lower lip in my nervous habit.

“Dad locked me in my room. He went out of town and.. he didn’t trust me.” My voice was weak and shaky but I knew Kevin could hear me.

“You’ve been locked up all this time?” Kevin asked and I nodded carefully.

“After.. after I could walk again.”

“Who took care of you?” Kevin asked and I clutched my shirt nervously.

“Dad left me food and water. Peanuts… and sandwiches.” I mumbled and felt my stomach flip. Silent tears ran down my face and I stared at the edge of the table numbly.

“That’s all you had? Peanuts and sandwiches?” Kevin asked, his voice tinted with a dark tone and I nodded stiffly.

“And chocolate. I.. I forgot the chocolate.” I mumbled and swallowed repeatedly, trying to keep my dinner down. I was sweating and my hair glued against my skin around my face. I felt dizzy and my chest heaved. Kevin saw me go pale and got up quickly, pulling me out of my chair and hauling me to the bathroom. I collapsed in front of the toilet seat and closed my eyes when my dinner came up. That was it; I was never eating chicken again.

Kevin held me up and brushed my hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ears while I hurled my dinner into the toilet. When my stomach was empty, I kept dry heaving and my skin felt clammy. I let my head fall forward until it was resting against the seat and felt Kevin let go of me. He left the bathroom and I wiped at my snotty nose tiredly. I had to go. I was too much trouble and Kevin would get angry. I still had the spanking I had received fresh in my mind and didn’t want to experience that again. Kevin came back and I couldn’t help tensing. A hand touched my shoulder and I opened my eyes, seeing a glass of water in front of me. I took with a shaky and flushed my mouth with the cool water.

“Feeling better?”

“I’m sorry.” I whispered and Kevin helped me up.

“When was the last time you ate real food, Jason?” Kevin asked and I shivered under his touch.

“I.. Pizza a few days ago. B-Before I r-ran.” I mumbled and Kevin felt my clammy skin with his hand.

“Right. Do you still feel sick?” Kevin asked and when I shook my head, helped me up from the floor and to the bedroom. He bundled me in the bedcovers and set me on the bed instead of the floor, ignoring my lame protests. “Nothing is going to happen to you in this bed, Jason. Sleep.” He said and I looked up at him with trembling lips. Kevin gave a small smile and left me to sleep, not closing the bedroom door.

I hugged myself tightly, unable to relax on the soft bed and noticed the towel on the floor. I went to pick it up carefully. It was dry now and I smiled while running my hands across the fluffy surface. I glanced towards the door hesitantly before moving to lie back down on the bed, hugging the towel tightly and rubbing my cheek against it. Kevin would get angry but it would be worth it.



The next time I woke up, my fever had gone down a bit and I was feeling sweaty. I lay still for a long time, realizing that I had slept on a bed for the first time in my life. I didn’t know how to feel about that and wondered if it was because if I trusted Kevin or because I had just been so exhausted that I would have slept anywhere. I heard someone come into the room and twisted so I could see Kevin. He gave me a smile and came to sit on the bed, waiting until I sat up slowly before handing me a steaming cup. I sniffed it carefully and Kevin said. “Veggie soup. I should have known your stomach can’t handle something as heavy as pasta yet.”

I blew into the steaming liquid for a while before taking a careful sip. It was good and I gave Kevin a grateful smile. “T-Thanks.”

“No worries. Are you feeling any better?” Kevin asked and I nodded carefully, letting my head drop and staring at the mug in my hand. I felt bad for intruding in his life ad set down my mug on the bedside table.

“I’m s-sorry, K-Kevin. I s-should go.” I mumbled and pushed the covers aside slowly. I was still holding the towel and looked down on it before letting go of it and moving towards the edge of the bed.

“No way in hell, ki.. Jason.” Kevin stated, catching himself just in time and not calling me kid, and pushed me back on the bed. “You are not going anywhere. Finish your soup and then you can take a bath.” He looked down at the towel on the bed and I blushed but Kevin didn’t say anything, just picked up my mug and handed it back to me. “Finish your soup, Jason. I’m going out for a moment, I won’t be long, okay?”

I nodded hesitantly and clutched the mug with white knuckles. My heart was pounding in my chest and I wanted to tell Kevin to not to leave me alone. He noticed my panicky expression and ruffled my hair gently. “Don’t worry, Jason. No one knows you are here and I’ll be back as soon as I can, okay? The door will be locked so finish your soup and take a bath, I’ll be back later.” He said and I watched him leave.

I gnawed on my lower lip nervously and sipped on my soup again. He would be back, this was his apartment, he would be back I told myself and leaned back against the headboard. My stomach felt so much better after finishing the soup and licked my lips, still hungry and wished there was more. I set the mug down on the bedside table before grabbing the towel and heading for the bathroom. I still felt weak and I hated how my legs wouldn’t stop shaking but at least I made it to the bathroom by myself.

I took my time in the bath, washing away the sweat and just enjoying being warm again. I tensed when I heard the door open and pulled my knees against my chest before looking up. Kevin stood in the doorway and looked sort of relieved when he saw me in the bath.

“Almost done?” He asked and I nodded timidly. Kevin smiled and turned away from the door. “I left clean clothes for you on the bed.” He said before disappearing out of sight and I thanked him quietly. When the door closed behind Kevin, I pulled the plug off the bottom of the tub and picked up the showerhead to rinse myself. I didn’t want to linger, knowing that it annoyed the bouncer.

When I returned to the bedroom, I found clean PJs folded neatly on the bed along with a soft sweater. I put them on and felt a twinge of guilt in my chest for leaving the clothes Kevin had given me at dad’s. I didn’t want Kevin to buy anything for me anymore.

I got dressed and pulled on the white fluffy sock I found from the bed as well before heading towards the livingroom. Kevin was sitting on the couch, sipping on a beer and staring at the TV while his features were contorted in a deep frown. I hesitated and stopped by the wall, fidgeting with the sweater. Kevin turned his head and saw me by the wall, lowering the beer bottle he had held on his lips down and saying.

“You should be in bed.”

I gnawed on my lower lip and kept my head down nervously. “I-I’m s-sorry.” I mumbled and Kevin sighed.

“Come here.” He said from the couch and made room for me when I moved closer. He pulled me to lie down on the couch and covered me with the fleece blanket before concentrating on the TV again. I was curled up tightly, my head against the side of his leg and hesitated for a moment before moving so I could set my head in Kevin’s lap. I was tense, not knowing if it was okay and glanced up carefully. Kevin picked up a pillow and stuffed it under my head before pressing my face towards the TV. I closed my eyes, snuggled closer to the blanket and rubbed my face against the softness with a careful sigh. I fell asleep with my head on Kevin’s lap and the man sighed heavily. He didn’t know what to do with me.