Believing in Myself

The second update today! Man, I feel so relieved I can set my work here again...

Chapter 26


John and Jessica had spent most of the day resting at the inn, while Aivon had told them he had some business to take care of. John\'s body ached all over and it was times like this that he wished Jessica had retained some of her angelic powers, especially her powers of healing. However, he couldn\'t complain, as when he woke up, he saw the sleeping, peaceful Jessica next to him. It was times like this, that she really did look like an angel, even though he knew that she wasn\'t anymore.

As the day wore on, they both traveled to Aivon\'s home. He opened the door and invited them in, before sitting down heavily. \"I guess you want to know about it, huh?\"

\"Yeah... so are you really a demon?\"

Aivon shook his head. \"Your only half right. I am only a half-demon. My father, who I know nothing about, is a full demon, while my mother is human. My father was apparently desperate to continue his own bloodline, even if it was tainted with human blood. No offence.\"

\"So those claws then...\" Jessica began, but Aivon finished for her.

\"They are a permanent mark of my demonic heritage. While demons can hide thier true appearences, as you saw with Atrois, half-demons like myself carry visual signs of our blood. In this case, my hands...\" Aivon rubed his gloves together and then pushed aside part of his tattered cloak, to reveal a set of black scales that seemed to provide a protective armor. \"And my torso. At first my mother did not know she had raised a half-demon, but when I started to show signs of it, she realized what had really happened, but still cared for me all the same. But it was too dangerous to remain. I had no choice but to leave.\"

\"So then you wandered around... and came here...\" John said, his interest increasing.

\"Yes. And I have kept my identity a secret ever since. No one in this village knows I have the traces of demonic blood in me. At first I was afraid people would discover my secret and try to kill me... as it happened in other towns I have traveled to. But my luck has helpped me still, and here I have remained, destinied to live out my days here.\"

\"But then why tell us?\" Jessica asked. \"And why not tell the rest of the village? After all, you\'ve done so much to help this place...\"

\"No... You see, people tend to react to things they neither understand or comprehend, with fear. It doesn\'t matter how many good deeds I do in this town... the moment they know who I am, I will be seen as a monster to them all. They won\'t think of how I saved them, but rather, why I waited so long to reveal it, and they will shame themselves for allowing a demon in thier midst. But as for why I tell you... I feel I can trust you with it. And with something more.\"

\"More? What else?\" John asked.

Aivon stayed silent for a minute, as though trying to best convey the words. \"I don\'t understand... my mother she showed me what it means to love another. She helped be grasp the concept of this thing called \'love\'. And there is someone that I share such an affection for, yet... it is different somehow. Deeper then what regular love may be. Is it lust? Pure want? What is it?\"

\"Aivon... what you feel is called love... but...\" Jessica looked to John and nodded. She held his hand softly, while Aivon watched, slightly curious. \"It is a deeper sense of love. It\'s the kind of love where you feel like your life will be more complete, more whole with someone. It\'s the kind of love where saying \'I love you\' doesn\'t feel like enough, like there is more to the meaning of it then you may know... I was once an angel, and I saw love differently then that. But my time with John made me see how love is much more then mere words. It\'s... hard to describe.\"

\"Yes... that\'s it... that\'s the feeling... with her. I want to be with her, express myself to her... but I cannot... I cannot, for to do so would mean giving away my secret. And if she saw me for who I was... then...\"

\"It shouldn\'t matter. If love is really that strong, then it won\'t matter to her if your a half-demon or not. She will like you for the person you are, not the person she sees.\"

\"...I see... thank you.\" Aivon walked away to the next room. \"I must do something... if you\'ll excuse me...\" With that John and Jessica left the room.

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The next day, they both were ready once again for travel. Having resupplied for thier trip across the mountains, they stood at the village gates, ready to depart.

\"I hope things go over ok with Aivon. He seems like a nice person.\"

\"Yeah well, I\'m sure he will be fine Jessica. Right now we have other things to worry about.\"

\"WAIT!!!\" John and Jessica looked as a tired Aivon came running up to them, a bag over his shoulder. \"Wait... I wanted to ask you... would you mind if I came along with you?\"

\"What!? Are you serious?\" John said, amazed.

\"Yes... I do not want to spend the rest of my life here hiding... I want to see the world, and see what it has to offer. Perhaps I can learn something from it.\"

\"But what about...?\" Jessica began, but Aivon knew what she was referring to.

\"As for the village, you need not worry. Everyone assured me they would try thier best to defend themselves. It\'s best they don\'t rely on me, for I can\'t always be there forever.\"

\"Well, yeah... but what about this person you love? I mean, leaving now-.\"

\"I want to go out... and face who I am. I want to face the world without regretting my own past or my own family. I was always hating the fact that I was different, that I was stuck in the middle, divided by my demonic power and my human feelings. But I must learn to embrace that fact. And I can\'t do it here, while hiding my secret. But once I return, I will not be afraid to show these people just what I am... nor will I be afraid of the consequences that follow. And as for her... I don\'t want to keep it a secret form her. But I must learn to accept myself first, before I can go about hoping others will accept me.\"

\"Well then, welcome along. I\'m sure this journey can teach you alot...\"

With that, the three of them left, turning thier backs on the village, and heading to the mountains.

All the while, someone had been watching. Sophia, from the top of the hill, could make out the three as they talked, although only one she really recognized. She gazed with sadness as they left, for she could not bear to come with the rest of the village to wish Aivon\'s goodbye. Seeing him leave hurt her very much, but she knew better then to stop him. Pulling out a piece of brown cloak she had found, she fought back a few tears. Ever since she had found it, she had wondered what Aivon had meant by watching her always, by seeing from afar, and never close up. In the end, she could not deny that his heart seemed only for her, that he cared for her far beyond the feelings of a mere protecter of the village. She held it tenderly, like a flower bud and closed her eyes.

\"Please come back safe Aivon... I want to hear from your own mouth... the words that I hope you always wanted to say all those times...\"