Thia's Memory

Reaching a hand to turn off the alarm Shane started to open his eyes “God damn it, stop ringing!” he shouted as he hit the small thing in order to stop it.

Staring at the room around him he recognized the place, he’d spent the night in the guest’s room in the house, refusing to even go up stairs and spend the night in his and Sam’s bedroom.

Sam!

‘Did what Rose told me really happen?’ he wondered as he got up and went to the bathroom. Washing his face he looked at the mirror and could see a stranger looking back at him. He had lost weight the last three months, ‘I didn’t have time to eat that’s why’ he stared at his reflection and knew that he looked terrible.

“I have to move quickly if I want to make it on time; it’s a big meeting and Irein would probably have a heart attack if I don’t leave right now.” He mumbled as he looked at his watch, it was eight thirty and he still had to go back to his apartment in order to change his clothes. His meeting started at ten am and he didn’t want to be late.

After he got dressed he left the house thinking that he wouldn’t probably pay attention to anything today in this meeting, ‘How on earth will I keep my mind off what Rose told me yesterday? Is that the truth? Did Matt really do this? Well maybe after Sam refused him she got into a car with someone else and he was the one who did that to her? I don’t know what to think.’ He said the last words out loud in frustration as he closed the door behind him, opened the gates and walked to his car.

At around nine fifteen he was dressed up and ready to leave his apartment after he had had a fast breakfast and a cup of coffee. Getting into the elevator Shane was so busy deciding, whether considering Rose’s words and going to Sam and demanding an explanation or leaving it like this and go on with his life, that he didn’t notice the old woman that lived next door talking to him.

“Huh? Sorry Mrs. Kraner, a lot of things on my mind and I didn’t quite hear what you just said.” Shane said stepping outside the elevator with the old woman walking beside him.

“That’s fine Shane, I was just asking you about your life and work.” The old woman answered kindly.

“Oh life! Well I’m fine Mrs. Kraner thank you. I hope Mr. Kraner is doing fine.” Shane asked politely as he stopped at the entrance of the building,

“He’s fine Shane, thank you. You should come visit us sometime.” Mrs. Kraner said with her English accent.

“I will,” Knowing he was running late and that he had to go he quickly said goodbyes to the old woman and walked away.

Settling behind the wheel Shane started the car and glanced at his watch, “Shit, I’m going to be late.” He exclaimed. It was already nine forty-five and the traffic was unbelievable. Deciding to take a short cut Shane knew it would take a little longer but the roads would be empty at this time.

Shane looked ahead and knew that soon Sam’s grandma’s house would appear as this was the road that leaded to the old house.

“What am I going to do with you Sam?” Shane spoke as he looked from his window at the old building.

“What the hell?” He cried as he saw a figure get out of a car with bags in her hands. Stopping the car in the middle of the street Shane heard people cursing him and he didn’t care much about their rude comments. He knew he deserved them but seeing her again made his mind almost stop working.

**********

“Shit, these are really heavy!” Thia exclaimed as she stumbled to carry the plastic bags that were filled with food. One of them had already cut and she had to carry it carefully so that it wouldn’t completely tear apart and the groceries wouldn’t fall to the ground.

Thia slowly put the plastic bags down so she could open the door. As soon as she stepped inside she heard noise behind her and people cursing loud. Turning around to see what happened she gasped as she saw a familiar car pull in front of the big gates which she didn’t have time to close behind her when she came back from the store.

Thia prayed to God that it wouldn’t be Shane in this car, but it seemed her prays weren’t answered as she saw him get out of it and started walking towards her. She could hear people calling out for him so he could move his car but he didn’t even turn to look at them, his eyes were focused on her and she couldn’t take her eyes off him too.

‘Think Thia, Think!’ she ordered herself when he was only few steps away from her.

Any attempts of having any rational thinking failed the moment Shane stood in front of her, staring at her as if she wasn’t really there and he was imagining things.

Thia knew she wouldn’t be able to stand there and look at him. She missed him so much and seeing him right now after what she’d been through the last few weeks she just couldn’t take it anymore.

Shane looked at her face and felt pain grow inside of him; she looked so pale and thin, not the same person. The sparkles that had always lit up her eyes were gone, her eyes were sad and there were dark shades under them. Her hair was tied back behind her thin neck and it made her look so young. He reached out a hand and touched her face, making sure she was actually there.

The moment his hands touched her she shirked back and looked down. Some strands of hair escaped and fell down her face and he couldn’t stop himself from stepping closer to her and pushing them behind her ear.

‘I still love her! After all what she’d done to me I still love her!’ He thought painfully.

Sam looked up and he could see tears in her baby blue eyes, “God I…” he pulled her into his arms and held her close ‘I must be out of my mind,’ he thought as he felt her so small in his arms. She clinched to him and started sobbing ‘how can she be a bad person?’ he wondered as he tightened his arms around her and breathed in her scent.

“Why? Why did you push me away? Am I really not good enough for you or….?” He mumbled in her ears as he stroked the hair away from her wet face.

Looking up at him she breathed hard and tried to step away from him “No, you’re not running away again! I want to know… Sam!”

“I….” she started and looked at the floor “I thought that….I… told you the reason be-”

“I don’t buy it Sam. I… you are not that bad person, I know you’re not. Why are you trying to convince me of being someone you’re not?! Is it because of Matt?” Shane asked and the moment the name came out of his mouth Sam’s eyes widened and she covered her face with her hands.

“Don’t believe her, she’s just telling you that coz of what happened to me. It’s not true Shane. Ann is lying!” Thia said quickly not believing how could Ann betray her and go tell Shane about Matt! ‘How can she tell him where I was, I can’t believe she did this to me!’ she thought. But then something hit her, ‘Ann doesn’t know where I am!’

Shane was staring at her with a strange expression and she couldn’t do anything but stare back.

“Ann didn’t tell me anything Sam.” He said sadly.

Realizing they were standing outside the house Thia turned to step inside. She glanced behind her to see if Shane was following when she was half way inside. He was following her alright, but his head was dropped down and his expression was solemn.

He stopped in the middle of the hall and spoke “Then it’s true?”

Thia froze in her place. She slowly turned around and met his questioning eyes, “Who told you that?” she asked.

“Does it matter?” he asked, turning from sad to angry “Answer me Sam, is it true?”

Biting on her lower lip Thia had to fight the battle wagging inside her mind, ‘should I tell him or not?’

“Is it?” his voice loud and clear startled her and she closed her eyes trying to stop the single word from coming out.

“Sam answer me!”

“Yes, yes it’s true.” She screamed “yes it was Matt! He tried to rape me Shane. He was the one.”

“Why didn’t you tell me the truth when I came after you?” he asked in an emotionless tone.

“What did you want me to tell you?” she asked as she walked to stand in front of him “What would have been your reaction if I had told you that Matt did this to me only hours after he had died?” she asked loudly.

Shane looked at her silently and when he didn’t answer she answered the question herself “You would have hated me. And probably wouldn’t have believed me; that’s what you would have done Shane so don’t ask me why I didn’t tell you the truth.”

“And telling me that I weren’t good enough for you is something you thought I’d love you for? Telling me that you made a mistake when you married me was supposed to make me feel better?” Shane asked angrily “Is that how you think? Didn’t you think that maybe I loved you so much that what you’d told me that day broke my heart? That I’ve been slowly destroying my life because of it!”

“I did it for your sake!” she defended.

“No, you did it for your sake. You’ve always had this stupid feeling that I’d leave you like your parents did right?” he shouted “I tried to show you how much I loved you before we got married! I tried to make you feel safe because I knew you weren’t secure about this part of your life. But instead you left when you had the first chance, thinking that I was cheating on you! Sam if I weren’t there that day, if Jenny wasn’t there that day, you would have found any other way to destroy your peaceful life because you were afraid!”

“NO!”

“Yes, yes you were afraid. You’re still afraid Sam.” Shane put his hands on her shoulders and shook her a little “how can I make you understand….no make you believe that I’d never leave you, I’d never cheat on you, and I’d never hate you because of someone else’s fault.” He said and with every word he lowered his voice “even if it was my best friend!”

Tears were falling down Thia’s face as she listened to what Shane was saying “I…” she tried to speak but the words almost suffocated her “it’s too late.”

“No, no it’s not. I still love you and…” he put his fingers down her chin and made her look up at him “Do you still love me?”

Thia’s mind screamed ‘YES, YES I Love him!’ but she couldn’t ignore that small sound in the back of her mind that was telling her ‘what if you do something in the future that will make him hate you? Will you be able to live without him?’

Thia looked at him and saw how his face darkened when she didn’t answer his question. He let go of her and stepped away “I don’t know what to do!” he said and closed his eyes as he turned around to leave.

“I love you,” She screamed and saw him stop. Knowing that she would never be able to live without him she screamed again “I love you Shane, so much.”

Shane stood still when he heard her words. He slowly turned to look at her wanting to know if she really meant it.

Taking one hesitant step towards him she spoke again “I still love you. I never stopped, and it killed me everyday thinking that you were hurting because of me.”

She took another step and stopped again “I thought you’d hate me if I tell you something bad about your best friend, I was stupid I know but…… but you know more than anyone how I felt about my parents and…… and when I pushed you away I became quite sure that,” she looked down at the floor “that you hate me because of the things I said. I’m always the reason Shane, I’ve always pushed the ones I love away it seems. I wasn’t even able to keep something inside of me!”

Shane had listened to what she was saying with a doubt still inside of him, “How will I live with you, knowing that you don’t completely trust me?” he asked when she talked about pushing him away. But when she finished her last words he couldn’t stop his mind from understanding the only explanation for them.

“What do you mean you weren’t able to keep something inside of you?” hoping she only meant she couldn’t keep her love for him inside her, Shane asked his question.

Seeing how Sam’s eyes filled with tears and she didn’t try to hide them he was sure what he’d understood was what she meant.

“Sam,” he whispered “Sam look at me. What happened?” He knew the question wasn’t the right one, but he had to know.
Thia stared at her feet and knew she had to tell him about the babies. It hurt her to talk about it, but he had the rights to know.

“After our last conversation, I had a problem with keeping anything inside my stomach. I used to spend days without eating anything, it all lead to a -” she looked up and found him standing only few inches away from her, looking down at her and smiling.

Thia looked from his face to his shoulders and longed for his arms. She threw herself at him and he held her close. Kissing her head, her hair and then cuddling her face in his hands. Shane kissed away the tears running down her cheeks. She grabbed him down to her and placed her lips on his. She felt his hands lift her up and carry her up the stairs, all the while not breaking their kiss.

Shane stood with her in his arms in the middle of the hall way. She lifted her head and pointed at her door.

Shaking his head firmly he spoke “No, that was your room when you were a little girl. When you used to think you were the reason for your parents death, when you thought something you can do can make me stop loving you. You are not the same person anymore right Thia?” Shane intended to call her Thia.

Looking deeply into his grey eyes, Thia lifted her hand and touched his lips “Samantha Wilson, Shane.” She smiled and kissed him lightly on his lips “No more Thia or Sam.”

**********

Months later….

Running as fast as he could, Shane sprinted through the doors of the hospital and quickly stopped a nurse on his way “Please… where can I,” trying hard to breathe he had to stop talking. But he couldn’t, he had to keep talking.

“Shane!” A familiar voice called from behind him. He turned to look at Ann as she came running from the end of one of the corridors.

“Where is she Ann?” he asked breathlessly.

“Come with me!” She ordered seriously and he started to get real scared.

“Don’t tell me something happened!” he mumbled as he tried hard not to hit someone on his way behind Ann.

“You’re LATE!!” she shouted over her shoulders.

Finding it a little bit easier to breathe, Shane stopped suddenly as not to push Ann to the floor. He was becoming quite used to how Ann reacted all the time. She was a tempo! But when she wasn’t angry or nervous she was such a nice person.

Anyway she wasn’t that nice person right now!

“Shane, you’re late.” He heard a young voice and felt something tug at his sleeves.

“She’s right, you’re late.” Suzan agreed with her younger sister Dina as she walked to stand on his other side.

He was planning on explaining what took him so long when his mother came out of a door on his right and exclaimed “You’re late!”

“PEOPLE. It’s ten am. I left everything and came as fast as I could in only twelve minutes! I’m not that late!!” he shouted as he faced four angry faces and another two of nurses passing by, shooting him an angry look coz of his loud voice.

“Would you please, just tell me where my wife is?” He asked forcing himself to cool down a bit.

“They’re inside.” Dina was nice enough to answer his question and he gave her a quick smile before running towards the closed door where his mom came out moments before.

“Thank you Dina, you’re such a nice person.” He mumbled as he opened the door and looked back at her.

“Just get you’re ass inside.” Ann ordered firmly but he could see a smile creeping at the corners of her mouth.

************

Shane closed the door and turned around. He sighed with relief when he saw his lovely wife lying in a bed and holding a pink blanket.

“Hey there.” He whispered, taking few steps inside the room.

Lifting her head a little Samantha looked up at him “Hey baby.” She answered and smiled weakly as he leaned closer to kiss her forehead.

“You’re here.” She smiled as she watched him look from her to the small pink blanket where a small squeak was coming from.

“She’s so small.” It was all he could say as he looked at the face of his daughter.

Giggling softly Samantha weakly grabbed his sleeves and sat him down on the bed next to her.

“You’re the second one to do this today.” He laughed as he carefully carried his little girl in his arms.

“Is that so? Who may I ask?” she asked trying to stiff a laugh when Shane’s finger hesitantly touched the small girl and she started crying.

“Oh… ah…” he obviously didn’t know how to stop the baby girl from crying and was about to give her back to her mother when she slowly stopped crying.

“That’s good; you know how to do this.” Samantha whispered.

“Huh?” he questioned, and then realized he was gently rocking back and forth without knowing it.

“So, gonna tell me who you were talking about?” Samantha asked.

Shane looked long at his daughter then turned his head to look at his wife “Dina, she was angry because I was late. Well, not Dina only, they actually almost killed me out there.”

“Oh, you weren’t that late.” She giggled.

“Exactly, that’s what I told them.” He agreed with enthusiasm then his expression changer “But you know, they were right, I was late. But believe me honey I-”

She put her hand on his mouth and stopped him “You’re here, aren’t you?”

Smiling, he kissed her palm “I didn’t want you having any thoughts about why I was late,” he had to continue fast as he saw her expression “Honey, I love you but sometimes I really don’t know what goes on inside this mind of yours.”

Looking at him for a while Thia smiled to herself, in her thoughts she’d always be Thia. The woman who she’d became after the accident, a somehow confident woman, a woman who started her life from zero and was able to get on her feet in no time, ‘but it all changed Thia, it all changed the moment he appeared! You became a woman in love!’


The End.

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Hiii everyone, I really hope you liked this last chapter and the whole story!

I would like to thank everyong who reviewed this story; Enas, angle, southern, yoka, fallenfromgrace, tenshistar, kc, blondiexoxo, Rita, Storyjunkie, megan,Phoenix, Keyonnamc, Scarlet angel, Dini, Calyciflrae, JisAtsU_siLENCE, Ana, Loki, Lazymonkey, Guys your reviews made me soooo happy and kept this story going. I hope the last few chapters weren't so insane and sad.

Well, thank you and let me know what you think :)