The Gay Man's Matchmaker
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Romance › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
26
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3,447
Reviews:
18
Recommended:
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Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Romance › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
26
Views:
3,447
Reviews:
18
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Chapter 26
Chapter 26
“I can’t believe we made it to the wedding … and she STILL wants to marry you!” I exclaimed to Tommy as they waited in front of the altar.
Guests were filing into the church sporadically, some ushered in to the front rows by Tommy’s three cousins and two college buddies, others not bothering to wait and nabbing choice aisle seats to see the bride’s graceful walk to the altar. At least I hope it’ll be graceful. I have no doubts about Lauren … it’s her crazy father I was worried about. He’s as loony as they come, though I won’t tell his daughter that. She adores her crazy pops, and who am I to disillusion her?
“I hate to admit it,” Tommy muttered lowly to me to keep the mic his videographer attached to his lapel from picking it up. “But I have to agree with you there. I almost screwed things up big time.”
“When?”
He couldn’t be talking about the whole Joey incident. Even I quickly forgave him. Well, after the whole she-male at his bachelor party thing, that is.
“When I tried to convince her to go on another island cruise last week.”
“You did what?” I was affronted beyond belief! He knew damned well I was working on his honeymoon for him so that Lauren wouldn’t have to go somewhere she’s already been to a gazillion times! All he had to do was fork over his Amex card. How hard is that? I’m doing all the rest of it! Can you see the steam coming out of my ears?
“I know, I know!” he groused. “But I saw this great deal on Carnival’s web site!”
And now he’s penny-pinching?! Oh, he would have deserved a size 5 stiletto up his tightie-whities for that one! I don’t blame Lauren one bit!
“You colossal ass!” I cried, not giving a shit about his mic. “You knew I was working on things!”
“I know! I told her that as soon as she took a breath from telling me off!”
“Which you deserved, you moron!”
I saw the videographer stifle a laugh and knew he’d heard that, so I waved to the camera for good measure.
“As soon as she heard you were arranging things she was quite happy,” Tommy said with a pout. “Is this what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life? You two conspiring to make my decisions for me?”
“Well if you could be trusted to make them for yourself you wouldn’t need us!” I smirked. “Besides, you’ll love Scotland once you get there.”
I looked over the pews again and smiled at Lauren’s mother as she was seated by Chris’ cousin, Phil. I could see where Lauren got her petite figure from. Although she was in her late fifties, Lauren’s mom was still a knockout. I would never, ever, for the life of me understand how Lauren’s nutcase of a dad snagged her. I did the calculations and it couldn’t have been because of Lauren. She wasn’t born until her parents had been married for a couple of years … unless there’s something I don’t know. I shook my head. The guy must be hell on wheels in the sack. That’s all I could come up with.
Tommy’s side was just starting to fill up, his relatives being the sort who shunned time constraints. (Is it any wonder I spend most of time with him rolling my eyes?) His mom grinned from ear to ear when my gaze rested on her and she waved enthusiastically. Well, of course she did! She achieved her grandest dream: pawning Tommy off on someone else. I have no doubt she loves her son (she spoiled him rotten enough!) But she always told us it would take a strong woman with the fortitude of an archangel and the patience of Mother Theresa herself to survive being married to Tommy. How right she proved to be! You know, now that I think about it, maybe she wasn’t really teasing us when she called me Tommy’s secret wife after we moved in together. In retrospect, maybe she was trying to plant an idea in our heads. I shuddered in revulsion just thinking about it and returned her wave with a half-hearted one of my own.
It didn’t take long after that for the music to start playing. At first, it was a light, happy tune to get the crowd’s attention. That’s when we all looked to the back of the church excitedly. The flower girl started the procession, strewing an assortment of petals as she made her way down the aisle with a blush on her small, cherub-like cheeks, followed by the two small ring bearers. Then the bridesmaids slowly filed out and walked carefully down upon the petals, their heads held high. They were led by Victoria, the tallest of the bunch, and she sure knew how to carry herself in a gown. She looked absolutely gorgeous, and I stole a glance at the crowd to see Elaine’s reaction. She smiled at Vic’s entrance.
I was pleased as anything she and Sam could be at the wedding due to some RSVP declines. Well, in Sam’s case, the reception anyway. He had to work a double shift the day before to get the time off, switching with another waiter, so he was sleeping in to rest up. But at least Chris would have his boyfriend with him that evening. I knew Warren would be there, and now at least Chris wouldn’t have to face him alone. Scanning the crowd worriedly, I was relieved to see that Warren and Jake weren’t there. Maybe they wouldn’t make it after all. That wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.
My thoughts were interrupted when the organist started playing The Wedding March. I could see the skirt of Lauren’s dress as she twirled around off to the side. She was supposed to be in place for her walk down the aisle already! I hoped the hell nothing was wrong … and by nothing, I mean that I hoped her crazy father hadn’t done something stupid like lock himself in the bathroom or something. Seriously, that man needed medical attention of the mental kind – in a bad way! It looked like Lauren was pulling on something, though I couldn’t see what. The driver from one of the limos appeared behind her and helped her pull on whatever it was … which turned out to be the One Who Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, just as I feared. He stretched his neck out, straightened his bowtie then took Lauren’s arm and stepped into position, like nothing had happened. I would get the story behind that later, I vowed, glaring at him hotly as he escorted her down.
But then I just gazed at Lauren. She looked … magnificent! Her dark hair was done up into a French twist and her makeup was flawless. Her dress fit her like a glove and the six foot train obediently followed her down, fanning out at the ends in a Princess-Di style. I peered at Tommy for a second and saw tears in the big idiot’s eyes. Maybe there was hope for him after all! When Lauren reached the front, her father lifted her veil, getting it caught on his watch in typical klutzy fashion. I sighed as I deftly unhooked him and the rest of the ceremony went on without a hitch … though I bit the inside of my mouth to stay quiet during the part where the crowd was asked if there was any objection to the union. Hey, don’t look at me that way! I don’t want him! I’m more worried about her!
When it was done and Lauren was now legally bound to a man only surpassed in oafishness by her father, we all filed outside to take some pictures and greet the congratulating guests. I hugged Lauren long and hard just before she and Tommy got into their limo.
“I sure the hell hope you know what you’re doing,” I whispered in her ear. She laughed out loud at that.
“I promise you I do!” she replied, pulling back and looking at me with a cheeky grin. “And anyway you had a hand in it!”
“If I’d known then what I do now I would have fixed you up with someone better,” I insisted.
“There is no one better for me,” she chuckled. “You know that.”
“Well, there certainly is no one better for him,” I snorted. “That much I know for sure!”
“Congrats,” Vic jumped in, hugging Lauren. “I’m so happy for you!”
“I’m happy for us too!” Tommy cried.
“You’re just happy she went through with it!” I remarked.
“That too!”
We laughed and Vic and I helped Lauren into the limo, pushing Tommy in after her.
“No don’t get too drunk on your way to the hall,” I said, shaking my finger at my best friend. “I’m not carrying your carcass into the place!”
“You couldn’t!” he smirked.
“No, but then I would have to,” Joey said smoothly as he leaned in behind me to peer into the car. “And we both know how much that would irk you.”
“Gillson.”
“McNeil,” Joey replied just as seriously. “Congratulations on sealing your biggest deal ever.”
“Thanks,” Tommy said grudgingly.
“Yeah,” Lauren laughed. “We’re so glad you could make it, Joey!”
“It’s my pleasure,” he grinned back at her, just to annoy Tommy even more. “You looked so beautiful up there!”
“Oh, thank you!” she melted.
Tommy’s scowl deepened as I held back my laughter.
“I can’t believe we made it to the wedding … and she STILL wants to marry you!” I exclaimed to Tommy as they waited in front of the altar.
Guests were filing into the church sporadically, some ushered in to the front rows by Tommy’s three cousins and two college buddies, others not bothering to wait and nabbing choice aisle seats to see the bride’s graceful walk to the altar. At least I hope it’ll be graceful. I have no doubts about Lauren … it’s her crazy father I was worried about. He’s as loony as they come, though I won’t tell his daughter that. She adores her crazy pops, and who am I to disillusion her?
“I hate to admit it,” Tommy muttered lowly to me to keep the mic his videographer attached to his lapel from picking it up. “But I have to agree with you there. I almost screwed things up big time.”
“When?”
He couldn’t be talking about the whole Joey incident. Even I quickly forgave him. Well, after the whole she-male at his bachelor party thing, that is.
“When I tried to convince her to go on another island cruise last week.”
“You did what?” I was affronted beyond belief! He knew damned well I was working on his honeymoon for him so that Lauren wouldn’t have to go somewhere she’s already been to a gazillion times! All he had to do was fork over his Amex card. How hard is that? I’m doing all the rest of it! Can you see the steam coming out of my ears?
“I know, I know!” he groused. “But I saw this great deal on Carnival’s web site!”
And now he’s penny-pinching?! Oh, he would have deserved a size 5 stiletto up his tightie-whities for that one! I don’t blame Lauren one bit!
“You colossal ass!” I cried, not giving a shit about his mic. “You knew I was working on things!”
“I know! I told her that as soon as she took a breath from telling me off!”
“Which you deserved, you moron!”
I saw the videographer stifle a laugh and knew he’d heard that, so I waved to the camera for good measure.
“As soon as she heard you were arranging things she was quite happy,” Tommy said with a pout. “Is this what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life? You two conspiring to make my decisions for me?”
“Well if you could be trusted to make them for yourself you wouldn’t need us!” I smirked. “Besides, you’ll love Scotland once you get there.”
I looked over the pews again and smiled at Lauren’s mother as she was seated by Chris’ cousin, Phil. I could see where Lauren got her petite figure from. Although she was in her late fifties, Lauren’s mom was still a knockout. I would never, ever, for the life of me understand how Lauren’s nutcase of a dad snagged her. I did the calculations and it couldn’t have been because of Lauren. She wasn’t born until her parents had been married for a couple of years … unless there’s something I don’t know. I shook my head. The guy must be hell on wheels in the sack. That’s all I could come up with.
Tommy’s side was just starting to fill up, his relatives being the sort who shunned time constraints. (Is it any wonder I spend most of time with him rolling my eyes?) His mom grinned from ear to ear when my gaze rested on her and she waved enthusiastically. Well, of course she did! She achieved her grandest dream: pawning Tommy off on someone else. I have no doubt she loves her son (she spoiled him rotten enough!) But she always told us it would take a strong woman with the fortitude of an archangel and the patience of Mother Theresa herself to survive being married to Tommy. How right she proved to be! You know, now that I think about it, maybe she wasn’t really teasing us when she called me Tommy’s secret wife after we moved in together. In retrospect, maybe she was trying to plant an idea in our heads. I shuddered in revulsion just thinking about it and returned her wave with a half-hearted one of my own.
It didn’t take long after that for the music to start playing. At first, it was a light, happy tune to get the crowd’s attention. That’s when we all looked to the back of the church excitedly. The flower girl started the procession, strewing an assortment of petals as she made her way down the aisle with a blush on her small, cherub-like cheeks, followed by the two small ring bearers. Then the bridesmaids slowly filed out and walked carefully down upon the petals, their heads held high. They were led by Victoria, the tallest of the bunch, and she sure knew how to carry herself in a gown. She looked absolutely gorgeous, and I stole a glance at the crowd to see Elaine’s reaction. She smiled at Vic’s entrance.
I was pleased as anything she and Sam could be at the wedding due to some RSVP declines. Well, in Sam’s case, the reception anyway. He had to work a double shift the day before to get the time off, switching with another waiter, so he was sleeping in to rest up. But at least Chris would have his boyfriend with him that evening. I knew Warren would be there, and now at least Chris wouldn’t have to face him alone. Scanning the crowd worriedly, I was relieved to see that Warren and Jake weren’t there. Maybe they wouldn’t make it after all. That wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.
My thoughts were interrupted when the organist started playing The Wedding March. I could see the skirt of Lauren’s dress as she twirled around off to the side. She was supposed to be in place for her walk down the aisle already! I hoped the hell nothing was wrong … and by nothing, I mean that I hoped her crazy father hadn’t done something stupid like lock himself in the bathroom or something. Seriously, that man needed medical attention of the mental kind – in a bad way! It looked like Lauren was pulling on something, though I couldn’t see what. The driver from one of the limos appeared behind her and helped her pull on whatever it was … which turned out to be the One Who Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, just as I feared. He stretched his neck out, straightened his bowtie then took Lauren’s arm and stepped into position, like nothing had happened. I would get the story behind that later, I vowed, glaring at him hotly as he escorted her down.
But then I just gazed at Lauren. She looked … magnificent! Her dark hair was done up into a French twist and her makeup was flawless. Her dress fit her like a glove and the six foot train obediently followed her down, fanning out at the ends in a Princess-Di style. I peered at Tommy for a second and saw tears in the big idiot’s eyes. Maybe there was hope for him after all! When Lauren reached the front, her father lifted her veil, getting it caught on his watch in typical klutzy fashion. I sighed as I deftly unhooked him and the rest of the ceremony went on without a hitch … though I bit the inside of my mouth to stay quiet during the part where the crowd was asked if there was any objection to the union. Hey, don’t look at me that way! I don’t want him! I’m more worried about her!
When it was done and Lauren was now legally bound to a man only surpassed in oafishness by her father, we all filed outside to take some pictures and greet the congratulating guests. I hugged Lauren long and hard just before she and Tommy got into their limo.
“I sure the hell hope you know what you’re doing,” I whispered in her ear. She laughed out loud at that.
“I promise you I do!” she replied, pulling back and looking at me with a cheeky grin. “And anyway you had a hand in it!”
“If I’d known then what I do now I would have fixed you up with someone better,” I insisted.
“There is no one better for me,” she chuckled. “You know that.”
“Well, there certainly is no one better for him,” I snorted. “That much I know for sure!”
“Congrats,” Vic jumped in, hugging Lauren. “I’m so happy for you!”
“I’m happy for us too!” Tommy cried.
“You’re just happy she went through with it!” I remarked.
“That too!”
We laughed and Vic and I helped Lauren into the limo, pushing Tommy in after her.
“No don’t get too drunk on your way to the hall,” I said, shaking my finger at my best friend. “I’m not carrying your carcass into the place!”
“You couldn’t!” he smirked.
“No, but then I would have to,” Joey said smoothly as he leaned in behind me to peer into the car. “And we both know how much that would irk you.”
“Gillson.”
“McNeil,” Joey replied just as seriously. “Congratulations on sealing your biggest deal ever.”
“Thanks,” Tommy said grudgingly.
“Yeah,” Lauren laughed. “We’re so glad you could make it, Joey!”
“It’s my pleasure,” he grinned back at her, just to annoy Tommy even more. “You looked so beautiful up there!”
“Oh, thank you!” she melted.
Tommy’s scowl deepened as I held back my laughter.