Edie

Edie

SasatheShy

--

Chapter Twenty-Two: Unexpected Feeling

--

Warm tears continued to drip down Edie’s reddened cheeks. She could not stop crying. She continued to wipe at them using a soft white handkerchief as she stared at her tired reflection. She could not stop imagining herself in Amana’s shoes, and what Amana had to endure. And the pain she must had faced.

Sighing, Edie folded her hands in front of herself. She bowed her head, fighting off more tears. She shook her head as she finally started to calm down. She knew there was nothing she could do for Amana. And since the inn was closed for the day, she could not do what she did best. Cook.

Exhausted, Edie decided that a small nap sounded good. She wiped at her eyelids, dabbing at the warm tears. She heard a click, and peering up, she gasped as she saw Cain’s reflection in the mirror just as he closed the door behind him.

Edie turned and faced him. She stared up at him, stunned to even see him there so early. She did not even take in the fact that he was standing in her bedroom until he mentioned it to her.

“So, this is your room?” he concurred as he took a step forward. His eyes roamed about before fixating on her dresser. He smiled when he saw the bouquet of flowers. He saw that the petals were starting to wilt, but he also saw that they had been taken well care of. “You kept the flowers? I am glad.”

He was soon right in front of her. Edie quickly looked down, but only momentarily. She wiped at her nose.

“What are you doing here?” she asked in a whisper.

“I heard the inn was closed for the day,” Cain said. “So I came to see you. But clearly I came at a -- difficult time.” He took a final step forward. He put his hand to his heart. “Edie, I want you to know that I had nothing to do with -- what happened to that girl that works for Tonisha.”

She looked back up at him. She showed him her sadness; her anger; her uncertainty. Remembering the woman with the long black braid made Edie shiver. She made fists as she stared straight up at Cain. “Y -- you have a fiancée…?”

Astounded by Edie’s words, Cain sighed as he crossed his arms. He shook his head a bit. “I was not expecting you to find out this way.”

“Were you ever going to tell me?” Edie advanced, suddenly. She nearly covered her mouth, but her hand kept distant from her lips. Instead, she twirled her fingers together, feeling ashamed for even asking such a thing during a time like this.

Even Cain was surprised. He could not help but smile a triumphant smile while leaning forward. “Are you jealous?”

Gaping, Edie stared up at him with wide eyes. “Jealous?” She obnoxiously huffed, which for Edie, was a foreign reaction. She shyly looked at his chest, trembling.

Just what was wrong with her?

“Not jealous, then?” Smirking, Cain stood up straight. “Of course, after what she did, I think that -- fiancée is far from what I should be referring to her as.”

That’s right. That is not important, right now. Well, only partially. Right now, Edie knew she was taking her emotions out on Cain, when, really, he had done nothing, this time. Sniffling, Edie felt more tears coming as she looked down. She shook her head, not caring that Cain was there.

In fact, his presence was currently welcome.

“It’s -- not,” Edie began, pausing briefly to choke back more tears. “Amana -- she was h -- hurt because of me. What happened -- it’s -- it’s all my fault. And now A -- Amana hates me.” Her lower jaw moved up and down, quivering as she started to take in what could had happened. She stared up at Cain, wanting him to hear her.

“What happened is not your fault,” he said clearly.

“Y -- yes, it is,” Edie cried. “S -- she was after me. She wanted me. I -- should have been the one she --- took. I -- should have been the one to t -- take out the trash. Instead --” she paused, and quickly, she stared up at him. “Instead, I -- was seeing you. If -- if you hadn’t come to see me, it --”

She could not handle anymore. She broke down. She covered her face, sobbing heavily as Cain neared her. “It could have been me! Oh God! It c -- could have been -- me!”

Without hesitating, Edie did something that, at that moment, could not even make her upset. She reached out and she wrapped her arms around Cain, pulling him into a hug as she buried her face in his chest. Cain was more shocked than her; however, he smiled and accepted the hug by putting his own arms soothingly around her waist.

“But it wasn’t,” he soon whispered once she had calmed down some.

Immediately, Edie stared up at him in shock. Her wide eyes glistened. “W -- what?”

“It wasn’t you,” Cain went on. “Just be thankful enough for that, Edie. You are safe. You are here, and you are safe. Sure, the other girl suffered, but -- thank God it wasn’t you.” Slowly, he reached his hand around her front, touching her chin gently. “I -- am thankful it wasn’t you.”

A soft moan left Edie, but she ignored it as she quivered. “M -- maybe I didn’t, but -- but Amana did. And -- I feel so selfish. I -- I’m so selfish…!”

“Is that so bad?” Cain pondered.

Slowly, Edie leaned back. “Cain?”

He repeated himself as he gazed down at her. “Is that so bad, Edie? Being selfish? No. You should not beat yourself up for what she went through. It didn’t happen to you, and you should feel thankful for that. You should feel relieved.” Pausing, he lifted his hands to cup her cheeks. He could feel her skin shivering. He wiped at her tears. “So do you, Edie? Do you feel relieved?”

Somehow mesmerized, Edie slowly nodded her head. “I -- I do.” She closed her eyes, holding back a second moan. “I -- I’m so --”

Cain raised a brow. “Go on?”

Sorrowfully, Edie reopened her eyes as she stared straight into Cain’s deep brown eyes. Her mouth fell ajar as she fought to let out what she wanted to say. She took a deep breath, releasing a hiccup also. “I’m s -- so glad that it wasn’t me. I d -- don’t want to think about what might have happened if it had been me. I -- I‘m glad it was Amana, and not me…” She drifted, but her eyes kept still.

There. The words had left her. What had been said was done.

“Good,” Cain whispered. “Good, Edie --”

Pushing forward, Cain had his lips on Edie’s in a single second. But he was gentle. He was fair. He kissed her with passion as they both inhaled. The kiss had surprised Edie; however, she was not the first to pull away this time. In seconds, Cain was pulling off of her. He sighed as he and Edie took deep breaths. He removed his hands from her cheeks as he peered down at her.

Edie licked at her salty lips. She pressed her fingertips to her lips, still able to taste Cain’s mixed sourness and sweetness. Unsurely, she fidgeted with her hands, but soon, something came over her.

For once, she knew how to react to Cain‘s suddenness. In the past, she had not. In the past, she had been weak, and not powerful. But now, she knew what to do.

Leaning forward, Edie gently cupped Cain’s cheeks. And all on her own…

She kissed him.

Pleased, Cain kissed her back. He folded his hands around her as they shared simple, sweet pecks, at first. Edie wanted to get used to his set of lips. In seconds, the kiss had deepened. Cain pulled Edie close while her hands wrapped snuggly around his neck. Their lips kept locked together. Edie welcomed Cain’s tongue inside of her mouth, where her own tongue greeted his. Their tongues twirled and danced as everything around them grew silent.

What was this feeling? It was different. It was something Edie’s never felt before. It was soaring beyond what she had felt when she kissed Lavan. At least, she was sure of it. Her body was craving something that she was sure she’s never before accepted. Something that made her feel frightened, yet at the same time -- happy.

Oh, what was it?

Did it matter?

No. It did not matter. Not one little bit. Edie just wanted it. She wanted it, and she wanted to accept it.

Never thinking it possible, a sharp, soft moan left Edie as her kiss with Cain deepened further. She did best to breath through her nostrils, for she did not want it to stop. She held him in place. She was sure that her nails might, at any second, rip at Cain’s skin, but she didn’t care.

It was heaven.

“Mm…” Her eyes fluttered.

Wait…! What -- was she thinking?

Before she could respond to her thoughts, there came a loud knock at her door just as it flew open. She and Cain quickly pulled away. Cain wiped at his uniform, fixing himself up in order to pretend that nothing had just happened. Edie wanted to wipe at her lips, but she put her hands behind her back, and allowed her tongue to lick over her lips, instead. She could still taste Cain’s tongue.

“Tonisha?” Edie whispered.

“Amana wants to see you,” she told Edie. She made sure that the door stayed wide open. She crossed her arms.

Edie gaped. “S -- she does?”

“Yes,” Tonisha said. “So Cain, if you don‘t mind?”

“Not at all,” Cain interrupted. He straightened his back, and placed his hands behind him. “After all, I now have some -- business to take care of.”

“You are serious?” Tonisha asked rudely. “Are you -- actually going to do something about this?”

Cain glared at Tonisha. “I can see that you are shocked by this.”

“Damn straight I am.” Sighing, Tonisha looked down. She shook her head. “I’m sorry, Cain. I’m just -- I never thought that you would do anything.”

“Well, I am,” Cain said. “Especially knowing that -- this was all meant for Edie.”

Licking her lips agitatedly, Tonisha looked up at Cain with shame in her eyes. “So that’s it, then? You’re -- helping because it involves Edie?”

Edie was not surprised by this. She now knew that Cain was serious about loving her. She slowly gazed up at him, feeling -- somewhat safe. She almost wanted to scoot a bit closer to him, for she could see that Tonisha’s anger was increasing.

“You should be grateful, Tonisha,” Cain affirmed. “It was because of Verity that any of this happened. Either way, Edie would have been involved. Now, I assure the both of you that I will talk with Gil and Bo, and I promise that they will be severely punished, including Verity.”

Startled, Tonisha said nothing more. She barely nodded her head while glancing at Edie. “Well then -- thank you, Cain.”

“Of course.” He bowed his head. “I will go and take care of it right now.” He turned to Edie. He wanted to kiss her, but since Tonisha was still in the room, he caressed her cheek gently, instead. “Everything will be just fine.”

Sighing, Edie nearly closed her eyes. She looked down as Cain left her bedroom. Slowly, she walked over to Tonisha, trying to get her mind off of what had just occurred only a minute ago. She crossed her arms over her bosom while doing best to clear her mind. She had to think of Amana. Amana had suffered, and Amana wanted to see her, now.

--

Edie quietly entered Amana’s bedroom. Tonisha closed the door once Edie had stepped foot inside. Left alone, Edie turned to the bed. She saw a small lump, and knew that it was Amana. The room was quiet and still. The only sound seemed to be that of Edie’s racing heartbeat. She was sure it was about ready to pound right out of her chest.

Taking a deep breath, she walked over to the bed and sat down on a stool. She saw that Amana was hiding underneath the covers.

Maybe she was asleep?

“Amana?” Edie gently whispered. She reached a hand out, watching as the covers moved. She sadly watched as Amana’s head peeked out from underneath the covers. Her hair and face both got washed, but she was still so pale from what she had gone through.

Frowning, Edie gently whispered, “H -- hi, Amana. Um -- Tonisha said you wanted to see me?”

Slowly, Amana turned on her side. For a few seconds, she did nothing but stare sadly up at Edie. The atmosphere felt cold, and Edie held back any shivers wanting to take over her skin. She was sure she had Goosebumps out of nervousness.

This was for Amana. It was all for Amana.

Edie gently put her hand on the bed, not going any further unless Amana wanted her to. “I --”

“W -- wait…” she heard Amana say.

Pushing back her covers, Amana slowly sat up. She kept the covers close to her body, covering over the long nightdress she was now wearing. She moved fragilely, wincing some as she leaned back. She rested her eyes on Edie. Edie could feel her heart breaking. She wanted to do something, but what? All she could do, for now, was patiently sit and wait for Amana’s needs.

Moving her arms slowly, Amana hugged herself. Tears stung at her eyes as she stared at Edie. Then, she spoke.

“S -- she thought I -- was you…” she whimpered. “And -- she -- took me -- far a -- away…”

Edie scooted closer, trying hard not to cry as she listened.

Amana pushed onward. “She -- they -- she thought I was you, and -- and they --” Pausing, she trembled. “They -- raped -- me…”

“Oh, Amana,” Edie said softly. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Amana.” Edie knew Amana was staring at her confused, but Edie felt as if she had to say this. “It’s -- it’s all my fault. It‘s all my fault. Please forgive me?”

Frowning, Amana looked down at her bed. She started to scoot to her right a bit, then she pulled back her covers. She had made room for Edie to join her on the bed. She slowly patted next to her. She was glad when Edie accepted.

To Edie’s gratitude, Amana laid upon her, resting her head on Edie’s lap. Edie gently brushed at her moist hair. It was still damp from Amana’s bath.

“I -- it’s not your fault,” she heard Amana cry. “It’s -- t -- that woman’s. She -- It w -- was -- they --” Sobbing loudly, Amana let out what had happened. “They h -- hurt me so bad, Edie… They -- raped me -- over and over.. I didn’t want it! I swear I didn’t. But they made me -- come.. They made me come over and over and…”

Bawling, Amana squeezed her eyes shut as she held Edie close. Her warm tears trickled down onto Edie’s lap. “And they -- came inside me -- They came inside me over and ---”

Edie held back tears as she rocked Amana back and forth. She could not believe what Amana was spilling. What she had gone through; what Edie could had gone through; it was painful to take in. “I’m so sorry, Amana.”

Neither of them spoke for some time. Amana took the silent moment to settle her tears. Edie continued to rock her, and it made their situation seem more soothing and relaxing. Edie stared up at the ceiling, thinking about what Amana told her. The poor girl’s terror had sounded worse than -- than what she had gone through.

Shaking her head, Edie glimpsed down at Amana. The girl was shaking a bit, but otherwise, she kept still.

“Amana?” Edie soon whispered. “There’s -- a secret I have that I’ve never told anyone before. But -- but I think that I want to tell you.”

Sniffling, Amana slowly moved her head up so she could look at Edie. “A secret?”

“Yes,” nodded Edie. She continued to brush at Amana’s hair like a caring sister. “Do you want to -- hear it?”

Wiping at her nose, Amana gave a quick nod. She was curious.

Smiling, Edie held her closer as she began. “Well, seven years ago I -- I lived with my parents in our village. But one evening, we were attacked. My parents were killed, and I -- well, I was raped.” She watched Amana gasp.

“Y -- you were -- raped?” Amana asked.

Edie leaned back. “Yes… A man raped me. I was your age when it happened.”

At first, Amana wanted to believe that Edie was fibbing. She wanted to believe it was nothing more but Edie trying to make her feel better. However, when she saw the sparkling sadness in Edie’s eyes, Amana felt ashamed for even thinking that it could be a lie.

Unsurely, Amana placed a hand on Edie’s stomach. She stared up at her with an sympathized stare. “I’m sorry.”

“Please don’t be,” Edie whispered. She leaned down and pressed her forehead against Amana’s. “I don’t want you -- to be. I just want you to know that I love you, Amana. And that I will do what I can to help you..”

“You will?” Amana cried. She allowed Edie to continue rocking her.

“Of course,” Edie sniffed. She still felt she was to blame for Amana’s torment. “I’m your friend. Right?”

Amana sobbed, but she agreed. Edie was still her partner; her friend; her somebody. “T -- thank you, Edie.”

--

Late afternoon had come and gone. Edie wasted away in her bedroom, having gone straight there after her visit with Amana had ended. Now, she surfed through her dresser to pick out some clothes to wear for when she finishes taking a nice, long, warm bath. She still had some tears leave her every so often, but she knew it’d take time to recover.

She no longer felt selfish. She knew she was just as upset as Amana was. She could had gone through such horror, but what Cain had talked with her about made her know that her feelings were strong and real.

Sighing, Edie lifted her head, watching as her door opened. She was expecting it to be Cain, but to her surprising disappointment, it was Tonisha.

Edie set the green dress she had picked out on her bed. She saw rage in Tonisha’s eyes. Slowly, she put her hands behind her back as she bowed her head.

“How’s Amana?” she asked in a whisper.

Turning her body, Tonisha answered while closing the door. “She’s sleeping now. I gave her the herb Tiller had given me.” Lifting her head, Tonisha walked over to Edie.

“T -- that’s good,” Edie said. She could smell Tonisha’s rich perfume. Slowly, she lifted her head. She saw that Tonisha’s rage was now shared with annoyance. Edie backed up a bit. “What’s wrong?”

Pushing back her hair, Tonisha placed her hands on her hips. She hardly got mad, but when she did, she did not stop it from showing.

“Edie,” she sighed. “I don’t know what’s going on with you and Cain, but whatever it is, you need to settle it.”

Tonisha’s inquisition perplexed Edie. She backed into her dresser, feeling her back touching the flowers resting there. “What?”

“He’s different,” Tonisha continued. “Ever since he saw you, he’s not been the Cain I know. He’s not been himself. And now, your little triangle has hurt Amana, and has hurt me. I can’t talk with Cain about this, but I at least can with you. I’m -- I’m very upset, Edie.”

“This…” Edie began. She bowed her head, nearing tears. “This isn’t -- what you think… I -- Cain‘s just -- it wasn‘t my fault.”

“Not what I think?” gaped Tonisha. All her rage released then. “I’ll have you know that I’ve known Cain for many years, and never has he been so obsessed about anyone like he is with you! It’s almost scary!”

Swiftly, Edie turned around. She fought back tears as she hugged herself. She didn’t want to discuss this with Tonisha. No -- not right now! Why was Tonisha pushing this onto her?

It wasn’t her fault!

“Please…” Edie whispered.

Tonisha shook her head. She huffed agitatedly as she glanced about Edie’s bare room. She eyed Edie’s back before moving back over to the door. She rested her palm on the handle, looking back at Edie again. “Whatever relationship you -- have with Cain -- is starting to cause havoc around here. I’m not asking you to talk to me, Edie. Just -- know that I don’t want anyone else getting hurt. Not even you…”

Moving half her body out the door, Tonisha was about ready to take her leave. To her alarm, three single words caused her to freeze.

“CAIN RAPED ME!”