Gravity of Love

Once I had regained some of my sanity I was more precise with the scissors and evened out my hair. I snipped here and there until I looked human again. I put up the scissors and ran my fingers through my new hairstyle. Not the best but considering the circumstances it looked pretty good.

I felt petty enough to let the staff clean it up; they cleaned up blood and everything else when Ren had his fun with me, let them deal with this too. I got up and glanced out the nearest window. The sun was up but dark clouds were creeping in, threatening rain later. I hated rainy weather so my trip to the hairstylist would have to wait.

I went back to the bedroom I shared with Ren, took a shower and changed into fresh clothes. I was about to head for the kitchen to grab some breakfast when the side bedroom door flung open. A wide-eyed Marcus came running into the room and wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me tightly.

"I'm so glad you're okay!"

I pried him off me and smiled down at him. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Marcus was staring in amazement at my hair, or probably the lack of it. "Y-you're hair….what happened?"

"I cut it, Marcus," I replied cheerfully. "You or someone else should go to the bedroom at the end of the hall, I left a mess."

"I don't care about the mess," Marcus snapped and hit me hard on the arm. "You weren't there when I woke up and I thought Ren had gotten to you!"

"I haven't seen him yet, is he still home or did he leave with Mannix?"

Marcus visibly paled when I mentioned the two names. "The both left a few hours ago but Mr. Halenfield had said he'd return shortly. What are you planning to do, Gavin? You know he isn't going to like what you did to your hair."

"Well, he'll just have to deal with it, won't he?" I almost sneered. "It's my hair not his and he can just fuck off."

Marcus made a sound close to baby pig and backed up away from me like I had the plague. The only problem was that he was staring past me, which meant that someone was behind me. And by the look on Marcus' face I had a pretty good guess who it was. Fuck!

"I can just fuck off, is that right?" Ren's voice was cold but simmering with rage. "You're my property so I say what you can and can't do."

I turned to face him and forced myself not to look down at the floor. Sure I was scared but I knew if I didn't stand up to him now I never would.

"I-I'm not property," I stammered. God, standing my ground was harder than I realized. I looked into his face and felt the urge to go to him and apologize for anything to just make him smile. NO! This was the moment when I had to pull away and show him that I was more than a pet. I was a man breaking up with his boyfriend.

Ren walked towards me and grabbed what was left of my hair. He managed to get a handful and yanked my head back. I whimpered from the pain but refused to breakdown.

"Then what are you, hmm?" Ren spat at me nastily. "You're MY whore. MY pet. MY warm body when the desire rises. You. Are. MINE. That's sounds like property to me, love."

"I'm not! I'm you're boyfriend that you abuse and whore out that's all! It's mostly my fault because I let you do it; I wanted you to love me. But I-I d-don't want that anymore."

Ren let me go so suddenly that I almost fell. "What did you just say?"

I raised my chin defiantly. "I know you don't love me. You're in love with Mannix and I don't want to love you anymore."

"You can't just turn love off," Ren said.

I scoffed. "Why not? You always did."

"I already told you I love you as much as I can," Ren snapped.

"NO!" I yelled. "You only gave what love you had left over from Mannix! And even then it wasn't love and you know it!"

I shocked Ren into silence and we stared at each other in silence before he finally cleared his throat and spoke softly. "Marcus, leave us."

He was probably waiting for his out ever since Ren walked into the room because he ran out of the nearest door.

Deep down I knew that this was coming sooner or later but I always lied to myself that Ren could change. That perhaps one day he'd love me, stop hitting me and treating me like a pet. Looking at his beautiful but deadly face I knew he never would. It wasn't just me that had to let go but Ren as well. He was prideful enough to hang on to something he didn't want. Perhaps he saw it as a defeat or maybe incompetence.

His issues not mine.

"You don't need me," I began softly. "You don't want me. You don't—"

I felt the tears race down my cheeks as all the emotions swelled up in me. I approached Ren and rested my head on his chest and hugged him.

"You don't love me," I whispered. "Let me go, Ren. Just let me go."

Ren stood frigid against me but gradually returned the embrace. I tightened my hold and he responded, hugging me closer to him. We stood there for what felt like forever; the pain we've caused each other falling hard like rain, washing over us. If what Mannix said was true then I was the wedge that kept Ren from the person he truly loved. And Ren was the thing that kept me from having a real and happy life. It was an opportunity for both of us to reclaim what we had lost. If Ren wasn't strong enough to give this charade up, I had to be.

"It's time don't you think?" I whispered softly into his silk shirt. I inhaled, smelling his sweet cologne and felt a pang of regret and cried even harder.

Ren's fingers slowly combed through my hair and his fingertips massaged at my scalp. He sighed heavily and I wish I knew just a fraction of what he was thinking. I froze as I felt his other hand slide down to the small of my back. Well, that answered my question.

Snaking its way underneath my shirt his hands kneaded at my back and caressed my sides. I moaned without meaning to and my breath quickened the more his hands explored my body. I put my hands on his chest to push him away but he bowed his head to kiss softly at my fingers. That simple touch of his lips on my skin made my heart miss a beat and I was quickly becoming aroused.

After all that was said was his only solution sex? Did he think a tumble in bed would erase everything and we'd wake up in the morning right as rain? Knowing that, why didn't I push him away? Why didn't I slap him and tell him to go to hell?

I did the exact opposite and returned his advances, leaning into his hands. I knew sex with him now would be hollow but having been without it for so long I craved for this last chance.

I had no idea what was going to happen after this but for the moment I let him guide me to the bed without argument. He was surprisingly gentle and patient as we slowly undressed each other and he laid on top of me. The sensation of his fingers nearly made me come as they worked gently in and out. His cock soon followed, filling me up with every inch and it made me cry out.

The sex was frantic as we both drove impatiently for that sweet release. I held on to him for dear life as our bodies rocked together in a hectic rushed pace. He panted my name and I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist, trapping him inside me. He drove deeper into me until I felt the first waves of pain riding like electricity through every nerve. I knew he was hurting me on purpose but that only heightened my arousal.

"I like it rough like that, if you didn't notice," I whispered into his ear.

Ren's laugh was breathless. "I figured," he panted and fell down inside of me so hard I whimpered. "Is good, yes?"

"Yes," I sighed. I smiled at him coyly and pushed at his chest with one hand and braced myself up with the other. Ren was so shocked by the sudden movement that I managed to roll us over but keep him inside me. I sat up so I could ride him, and grinded my hips down in a steady rolling motion. Ren's nails dug into my hips as he guided me up and down his shaft and his green eyes watched me with a hungry lust with every movement. Harder and harder my body bounced atop Ren until orgasm was but a short breath away.

Ren filled me up moments after I spent my load on his stomach. I collapsed on top of him and laid my head on his chest, listening to his pounding heartbeat. God, that was wonderful.

Ren gave me a soft peck on the forehead. "Get off," Ren whispered.

I lazily rolled off of him and sat up, pulling the covers over my body. I had enjoyed every sweaty minute but as I watched him calmly slip out of the bed I wondered if it was the right thing to give into my lusts. He went over to the corner of the room where he kept a safe hidden for emergencies and I heard the soft click of the door being pulled open. What the hell was he doing? When he returned to the bed he held a small fortune in his hand and with only a grin on his face he flung it at me.

"Get out," he said.

I scooted away from the wads of bills and stared at him in disbelief. "What's this?" I asked carefully.

Ren's grin turned nasty. "Just consider it payment for a service rendered, love."

"W-what?" I stammered. Was he actually paying me for the sex we just had? I pushed the stacks of hundred dollar bills away from me. "I don't understand."

"What's not to understand, heart? You're a whore; you fuck for money so I'm just upholding my part of the bargain."

He turned away from me and faced the window, peeking out through the blinds. He didn't bother to look at me when he spoke. "Your services are no longer required at On The Lash; you can pick up your last paycheck next week."

I was about to argue but then it hit me what was really going on. He was letting me go and this was probably the only way he could with keeping his precious ego intact. Throw me out like a useless cum rag and making me feel like shit was the price for getting what I wanted. Was it foolish of me to expect a more emotional goodbye? A last minute confession of love before we tear away from each other in tears? I guess that shit only happens in romance novels and movies.

I grabbed the money and quickly dressed. Before I left the room I went up to Ren and hugged him from behind.

"You loved me once," I whispered. "I'll always remember that."

Ren's voice was quiet. "I may have. Get out…please."

I pulled away from him and left the room and the only man I've ever loved behind. Within thirty minutes I had called a cab and packed a small bag of clothes and toiletries. The money Ren "paid" me would be more than enough to keep me going until I was able to find another job. I was sure that On The Lash wasn't the only strip club in all of Trudeau. I walked through the house one last time, remembering all the happy and painful –mostly painful—memories. It was hard to believe that this was it but I knew it had to happen.

The cab arrived shortly and I grabbed my bags to leave. I still had no idea where Marcus was; I wish I could have said goodbye. I opened the front door, took one last look around me, and left it all behind.