Take Me From This Pain, Brian's story
folder
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
39
Views:
8,694
Reviews:
80
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
39
Views:
8,694
Reviews:
80
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Here's what happened
"You know you don't have to," Matt whispered to Brian when the waiter began clearing their plates.
"You don't need to talk about anything you don't want to, Brian," Cody added sliding Grant a sideways glance to make sure that the older man understood this was serious.
"It's okay," Brian said softly. "I'll tell what I can.
Grant nodded and sat back in his seat waiting for his son and Brian to tell their story. He had to admit he was very curious about the small blonde. He remembered Matt mentioning a boy in school that he was "having fun with" the last time he'd visited Matt on the West coast.
"To begin with," Matt started. "Yes, he is the kid I was messing with, Dad. And no, I'm not proud of what I did to him. It's a flimsy excuse to say I didn't know what was happening to him, but it's all I've got."
"In his defense, he did get me away from Gary as soon as he did find out," Brian interjected. "I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for him."
"Be here as in Connecticut?" Grant asked, though he was afraid he already knew the answer to that question.
"Be here as in alive," the small blonde boy looked down at his hands.
Matt began rubbing Brian's back and whispering something soothing to him but Grant couldn't hear what they were saying. He knew, though, that Brian drew a lot of his strength from Matt. It reminded him of the way Cody had latched onto him once he'd accepted that Edison was gone for good. It was still kind of a shock though to know his son was gay. He'd been a little annoyed at his ex-wife in the beginning for not telling him, but then he realized he'd essentially done the same thing and knew she was only respecting both of their wishes.
Grant and Virginia had been very good friends in college and had always been there for one another. When Grant first suspected he was gay, he'd wanted to turn to her, but found he couldn't. Instead, he got very drunk one night before she came over for a cram-session in the one course they'd had together. One thing led to another and before they knew it, she found out she was pregnant just a few months after graduation. He didn't really know what to do but Grant figured there were worse things than marrying your best friends.
Unfortunately over the years, he found there were also better things and he wanted them. When he'd finally told her he was gay it was like a weight had lifted from his shoulders. It had been hard for them at first. Grant stayed in California for another year before the divorce. Through it all, however hurt she was, Virginia remained supportive of him, and for that he knew he could never repay her. Jolted back to the present by his husband's gentle hand on his knee, Grant looked back at Brian expectantly.
"Matt may have been bad to me at school once, but when he saw the bruises he made sure he found out what was happening." The small blonde was wringing his hands nervously and Matt was glad they were done with dinner, as he doubted he'd be able to get Brian to eat anything after this.
"That doesn't erase what I did."
"It does to me," Brian insisted.
Matt kissed the boy's fore head and gave him a brief squeeze for comfort.
"You see, my stepfather never wanted a family," Brian began when Matt pulled back. "Kevin and I pretty much knew this all along, but Mom, well, she always believed in the best in people."
"He married her for her money?" Grant asked perplexed. He thought that Brian and Kevin had no money other than what little they could scrounge off of Gary. Though he could have been squandering their inheritance for quite some time. Matt had told him about the drugs.
"N-not r-really."
"Shhh, slow down. Take a breath. This isn't an interrogation and my father isn't judging you."
"That's right," Grant added. He didn't want to intimidate the kid anymore than he was already. It was just his lawyer instincts took over sometimes. "I'm just curious. If you're too nervous to talk about it, don't worry."
"N-no," Brian took a deep breath. "I-it's all right." He took another steadying breath and looked up into Grant's eyes. They held a world of sympathy for the small blonde. Not unlike those of his boyfriend, Brian realized.
Grant could see all of the pain, betrayal and loneliness in Brian's gaze. The boy had spent the last three years or so in constant terror. Again, he didn't envy the job ahead of his son.
"Gary started beating me when my mom went into the hospital that last time," he began. "He would only hit me and he would wait until Kevin was asleep so that there were no witnesses."
Grant muttered a string of curses under his breath and Cody squeezed his hand tightly. He knew what Grant was feeling, but he was also painfully aware of how fragile Brian was right now. Anything could frighten back into the shell Matt had coaxed him out of over the last few months. There were times when Cody himself still felt that way, so he knew Brian was in for a long recovery.
"He-he didn't start . . . touching me until after she died, though," Brian went on. "He would tell me how he would use the money she l-left for us to buy his stash, and that if I told anyone, no one would believe me. He said he could always kill me and use Kevin until he turned 18. That was the magic year, see? He didn't have to tell me he was planning to get rid of me after that. I knew. But I also knew he would start bothering K-kevin if I did a-anything. So I . . ." Brian broke off on a sob and Matt gathered him in his arms. "I l-l-let him d-d-do it," he finished brokenly. "I didn't say anything. I d-didn't try t-to fight him."
The table was in a remote area of the restaurant and Grant was grateful for it as there weren't many patrons around to gawk at the scene. Not that he was embarrassed by it. He just didn't want Brian to feel self-conscious when they left.
"If you did, he might have tried to kill you sooner," Cody said in a soft voice. "I've been there, Brian. I know probably better than anyone else you'll talk to what could have happened. You are NOT a coward."
"B-but . . ."
"Listen to him," Matt soothed. "He's telling you everything the rest of us have been telling you, but he's been through it so he knows."
"Brian, nobody here thinks any part of this is your fault," Grant said. "And none of us find it an inconvenience to help you or your brother. We want you to have a happy life from here on out. You deserve it, after everything you've been through."
"And just because your parents have died, doesn't mean you don't have parental support," Cody said thoughtfully. "You may be 18, but Grant and I can give you any support you need."
"Kevin's got Gina. She said even if Gary doesn't go away before he turns 18, he's her adopted kid," Grant said.
"I'm sure Jason's thrilled at that," Matt interjected.
"And Virginia couldn't love you more if you were her own son," Grant grinned, ignoring Matt.
"That may be," Matt made a playful grimace. "But I'm thrilled to the max that he's not my brother."
"We're all aware of that," Grant smirked.
"Well aware," said Cody.
Brian sat quietly staring at his hands in lap, which were grasping Matt's hand unmercifully. He hadn't felt this kind of love and support for a very long time, since before his mom got sick. It was overwhelming and he didn't know how to react. He looked up at the other three questioningly.
"It's okay," Cody waved it off. "You don't have to say a thing. We know you're going to need time to accept it all."
"But you're okay with your son dating such a basket case?" Brian asked turning to Grant. "It doesn't bother you that I depend on him so much?"
"Brian, you're too close to the situation right now to see the big picture," Grant smiled. "When you get to that point, you'll see that it's not as one-sided as you believed it was."
"And you're NOT a basket case," Matt scowled. "It will probably take me forever to get that through to you, but I will make you see it."
"You have forever, though, don't you?" Grant asked taking a sip of the coffee the waiter just brought.
"We have more than forever," Matt said determinedly, not taking his eyes off of Brian.
"You don't need to talk about anything you don't want to, Brian," Cody added sliding Grant a sideways glance to make sure that the older man understood this was serious.
"It's okay," Brian said softly. "I'll tell what I can.
Grant nodded and sat back in his seat waiting for his son and Brian to tell their story. He had to admit he was very curious about the small blonde. He remembered Matt mentioning a boy in school that he was "having fun with" the last time he'd visited Matt on the West coast.
"To begin with," Matt started. "Yes, he is the kid I was messing with, Dad. And no, I'm not proud of what I did to him. It's a flimsy excuse to say I didn't know what was happening to him, but it's all I've got."
"In his defense, he did get me away from Gary as soon as he did find out," Brian interjected. "I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for him."
"Be here as in Connecticut?" Grant asked, though he was afraid he already knew the answer to that question.
"Be here as in alive," the small blonde boy looked down at his hands.
Matt began rubbing Brian's back and whispering something soothing to him but Grant couldn't hear what they were saying. He knew, though, that Brian drew a lot of his strength from Matt. It reminded him of the way Cody had latched onto him once he'd accepted that Edison was gone for good. It was still kind of a shock though to know his son was gay. He'd been a little annoyed at his ex-wife in the beginning for not telling him, but then he realized he'd essentially done the same thing and knew she was only respecting both of their wishes.
Grant and Virginia had been very good friends in college and had always been there for one another. When Grant first suspected he was gay, he'd wanted to turn to her, but found he couldn't. Instead, he got very drunk one night before she came over for a cram-session in the one course they'd had together. One thing led to another and before they knew it, she found out she was pregnant just a few months after graduation. He didn't really know what to do but Grant figured there were worse things than marrying your best friends.
Unfortunately over the years, he found there were also better things and he wanted them. When he'd finally told her he was gay it was like a weight had lifted from his shoulders. It had been hard for them at first. Grant stayed in California for another year before the divorce. Through it all, however hurt she was, Virginia remained supportive of him, and for that he knew he could never repay her. Jolted back to the present by his husband's gentle hand on his knee, Grant looked back at Brian expectantly.
"Matt may have been bad to me at school once, but when he saw the bruises he made sure he found out what was happening." The small blonde was wringing his hands nervously and Matt was glad they were done with dinner, as he doubted he'd be able to get Brian to eat anything after this.
"That doesn't erase what I did."
"It does to me," Brian insisted.
Matt kissed the boy's fore head and gave him a brief squeeze for comfort.
"You see, my stepfather never wanted a family," Brian began when Matt pulled back. "Kevin and I pretty much knew this all along, but Mom, well, she always believed in the best in people."
"He married her for her money?" Grant asked perplexed. He thought that Brian and Kevin had no money other than what little they could scrounge off of Gary. Though he could have been squandering their inheritance for quite some time. Matt had told him about the drugs.
"N-not r-really."
"Shhh, slow down. Take a breath. This isn't an interrogation and my father isn't judging you."
"That's right," Grant added. He didn't want to intimidate the kid anymore than he was already. It was just his lawyer instincts took over sometimes. "I'm just curious. If you're too nervous to talk about it, don't worry."
"N-no," Brian took a deep breath. "I-it's all right." He took another steadying breath and looked up into Grant's eyes. They held a world of sympathy for the small blonde. Not unlike those of his boyfriend, Brian realized.
Grant could see all of the pain, betrayal and loneliness in Brian's gaze. The boy had spent the last three years or so in constant terror. Again, he didn't envy the job ahead of his son.
"Gary started beating me when my mom went into the hospital that last time," he began. "He would only hit me and he would wait until Kevin was asleep so that there were no witnesses."
Grant muttered a string of curses under his breath and Cody squeezed his hand tightly. He knew what Grant was feeling, but he was also painfully aware of how fragile Brian was right now. Anything could frighten back into the shell Matt had coaxed him out of over the last few months. There were times when Cody himself still felt that way, so he knew Brian was in for a long recovery.
"He-he didn't start . . . touching me until after she died, though," Brian went on. "He would tell me how he would use the money she l-left for us to buy his stash, and that if I told anyone, no one would believe me. He said he could always kill me and use Kevin until he turned 18. That was the magic year, see? He didn't have to tell me he was planning to get rid of me after that. I knew. But I also knew he would start bothering K-kevin if I did a-anything. So I . . ." Brian broke off on a sob and Matt gathered him in his arms. "I l-l-let him d-d-do it," he finished brokenly. "I didn't say anything. I d-didn't try t-to fight him."
The table was in a remote area of the restaurant and Grant was grateful for it as there weren't many patrons around to gawk at the scene. Not that he was embarrassed by it. He just didn't want Brian to feel self-conscious when they left.
"If you did, he might have tried to kill you sooner," Cody said in a soft voice. "I've been there, Brian. I know probably better than anyone else you'll talk to what could have happened. You are NOT a coward."
"B-but . . ."
"Listen to him," Matt soothed. "He's telling you everything the rest of us have been telling you, but he's been through it so he knows."
"Brian, nobody here thinks any part of this is your fault," Grant said. "And none of us find it an inconvenience to help you or your brother. We want you to have a happy life from here on out. You deserve it, after everything you've been through."
"And just because your parents have died, doesn't mean you don't have parental support," Cody said thoughtfully. "You may be 18, but Grant and I can give you any support you need."
"Kevin's got Gina. She said even if Gary doesn't go away before he turns 18, he's her adopted kid," Grant said.
"I'm sure Jason's thrilled at that," Matt interjected.
"And Virginia couldn't love you more if you were her own son," Grant grinned, ignoring Matt.
"That may be," Matt made a playful grimace. "But I'm thrilled to the max that he's not my brother."
"We're all aware of that," Grant smirked.
"Well aware," said Cody.
Brian sat quietly staring at his hands in lap, which were grasping Matt's hand unmercifully. He hadn't felt this kind of love and support for a very long time, since before his mom got sick. It was overwhelming and he didn't know how to react. He looked up at the other three questioningly.
"It's okay," Cody waved it off. "You don't have to say a thing. We know you're going to need time to accept it all."
"But you're okay with your son dating such a basket case?" Brian asked turning to Grant. "It doesn't bother you that I depend on him so much?"
"Brian, you're too close to the situation right now to see the big picture," Grant smiled. "When you get to that point, you'll see that it's not as one-sided as you believed it was."
"And you're NOT a basket case," Matt scowled. "It will probably take me forever to get that through to you, but I will make you see it."
"You have forever, though, don't you?" Grant asked taking a sip of the coffee the waiter just brought.
"We have more than forever," Matt said determinedly, not taking his eyes off of Brian.