Heartless prick with puppy dog eyes

Thanks to everyone who reviewed, really appreciated your comments.

Xxx to Lisa for proofing.   

Ch.2


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Sometimes I wish I had a girl best friend; because now, in my bedroom, with the contents of my closet haphazardly thrown on every available surface, I wish I had someone here to help me. Trying to decide what to wear, I basically wish I had my best friend for advice; and given that he's the cause of this mayhem, I really, really wish I had a girl best friend. "I'm showing you off", he'd said. What does that mean for Christs sake?!

See, I don't actually have a lot of dressy things. Mainly because I'm a bit of a hermit, if I don't need to go out, I won't go out. I look after my disabled mother and to go out and find a baby sitter of sorts, sometimes that's more of a hassle than it's worth. 

Chris and I are neighbours, so we always hang out in my back garden. So when the two most important people in my life are in my house, why do I need to go out? That's what I think to myself on a good day. On a bad day, I sometimes think that I'm gonna be in this house forever. I'll never leave, while everyone around me will move on. I'll be alone. That thought scares me. The thought of Chris leaving me scares me. Not because of this crush thing, oh no, that's quite recent. It's because he's my best friend you know? We grew up together, and his family has been a rock to me when my mum suffered a stroke five years ago that left her partially disabled.
It could have been worse. She could have died. In fact that's what the doctors told me was the most likely scenario. But she's here and I love her to bits, and I've pledged to stay with her forever.

When I told Chris this, he gave me this funny look then said, "Nothing lasts forever." To which I said, "Piss on my parade why don't you!"

But it got me thinking. Chris's parents are hardworking folks. His dad is a truck driver and his mom is a secretary in a law firm and they make a decent wage that keeps their little family happy. Chris on the other hand, is a millionaire. How so, you wonder? Well it's a long story, but let's just say he created a pixeled website for online advertisements which is setting him up for life. The moral of the story? He doesn't have to live on our little street, or his little house, or stay in this small back garden with me. He doesn't have anything to tie him down to this place. He can up and leave anytime.

This little realisation made me think I had to do one of two things. Either start seeing less and less of Chris, wean myself off of him if you like, or get my fill of him. Spend as much time with him as possible, and that way when it's finally time to part, well, I will have all these memories to carry me through. What did I go for? The first option, because as much as I would've loved to follow through with the second option, letting go all of a sudden woulda killed me. It's partly why I set him up with Sky, I thought if he's with her, then he won't be with me as much. And in the end that's what my problem was, he was always with her and not me.

See, Chris is drop dead gorgeous. Green eyes, brown hair; a muscled body that doesn't make him look like a troll. Basically he's hot. Mouth-wateringly hot. And up to recently I thought I was immune to it. I mean i've seen him urinating on walls (when he was a kid), I've seen his messy room, I've seen girls throwing themselves at him and was embarrassed for them. 

I guess now I'm seeing what they're seeing, except I really would never ever throw myself at him, hell, I'm not even gonna show him I'm interested. He's too important to me to do that to our friendship. So this pretending shit? I hope I come out of it sane is all I'm saying.

The doorbell rings, and I go answer it; must be Chris's mother. She's babysitting my mom.

"Hey Ange" 

"How's it going? You're not dressed!!" she says frowning.

"I don't know what to wear! He hasn't told me where we're going, I'm not a psychic; I can't predict what's appropriate! Help!" I'm panicking, that's not good. 

"Breathe, in, out, that's it. You'll look beautiful no matter what you wear," she says soothingly. 

I snort. "What? With my elephant-like figure?!"

"Elephant like? Don't be ridiculous; you have Marilyn Monroe's figure, curves in all the right places. I'm surprised you don't have a boyfriend yet. Their loss, my son's gain, no?"

"Ange, you do realise this is a pretend date, don't you? He's trying to get rid of psycho Sky, that's all this is."

"Sure it is, now let's get you dressed. Lucky for you, I know where he's taking you."
 
"You do?" 

"Yes, but I've been sworn to secrecy, now shoo, upstairs!"

Forty-five minutes later I'm ready and I look good, even if I do say so myself. It's surprising how easy it is when you've got someone else's opinion. I put on a green maxi dress that's clinging to my top half, and flowing over the rest, with a long heart necklace and feather earrings. Ange's put this green eyeliner and eye shadow on me, which looks sooo different from the black liner I militarily stick to. A bit of blusher and clear lip gloss and I'm ready. 

"Come on he's waiting downstairs," she shoves me away from the mirror and towards the stairs.
I'm nervous. My stomach is doing little flip flops that's making me nauseous. I go downstairs as if I'm going to a death sentence. Why am I nervous? This isn't even a real date! With that in mind, I run down the rest of the stairs only for Chris to appear all of a sudden on the landing with me, effectively throwing my clueless self in his arms, which he'd lifted to steady me. He's as surprised at my sudden descent as I am, poor sod. I think I've physically knocked the air outta him. 
He's staring at me, making me feel uncomfortable. I avert my eyes and try to disentangle myself from him, but he leans close. Oh my god oh my god oh my god, I'm nearly hyperventilating, what is he doing?! I can only tense in his arms and stare at him. His head comes past my lips, lips grazing my cheek and landing on my ear.
 
"You look hot," he grins. His casual compliment makes me blush, not used to that kind of scrunity from him.
 
"Yeah, well let's get this show on the road, can't stay out too late, my mom and all," and I shove past him, praying to God he doesn't hear the tremor in my voice.

We make it to his car, I'm buckled and waiting for him to set off, staring resolutely out the window, conscious that he's looking at me.
 
"What?" I ask, finally giving in and looking at him.

"Green suits you."

No need to mention that I bought it 'cause it's the same shade as his eyes... "Thanks," I mumble.
"Where are we going?" 

"How does a Bollywood movie sound? Followed by sushi?"

Did I mention I loved Indian movies? Sad huh? I know, but the thing about Indian movies is, they ALWAYS have a happy ending. And when your life is shit, you need a Bollywood movie now and then to make you believe in a happy ever after.
 
"You hate Bollywood; I had to go to Dostana on my own because you wouldn't come with me and that had great reviews."

"Well I figured I'd see what all the fuss was about. We're seeing a movie called "Three Idiots."" 

I smile to myself, I love the guy in that. This night might not be as bad as I anticipated, All I have to do is stay composed and not give myself away. Two and a half hours in the dark without conversation, trying to keep up with the subtitles, should be a doddle.  

It's not a doddle. Not when he insists on holding my hands and snuggling with me in the darkened theater. When I asked him what he was doing all I got was, "You never know who's watching, we need to pull this off."
It takes a while, but I begin to relax in his arms, completely enjoying the movie. That is until a character commits suicide because he can't fulfill unrealistic expectations imposed by his teachers who won't give him an extension for a project. When a fellow student recognizes the genius behind the project design and decides to help, he's too late.

I begin to sob quietly. I can relate to pressures making you want to do reckless things. 
Chris's arms tighten around me, molding me to his chest, his hands stroking my hair back.
I know I said Bollywood movies are happy movies. They are, but only in the end; before that you'll pretty much feel every other emotion, and that in my opinion makes a good movie. 
It's not long after that that the friendship between the three main characters makes you laugh out loud every two minutes. I'm still semi-molded to Chris's chest and I can hear and feel his rumbling laughter. It's so comfortable in his arms.

That thought jolts me up, and I try wriggling out of his arms. I shouldn't feel this way dammit. He releases his hold on me slightly but not completely, and when I protest the guy in front of me makes an angry shushing sound. When I give Chris a dirty look, he just smirks at me.

After the movie we go to this awesome place for sushi, that I didn't know existed, and it's beyond delicious. We sit in a cozy corner, Chris burying his face in the crook of my neck every time someone we recognize walks past. It's apparently a big date venue which would explain why I didn't know anything about it I guess, being the antisocial moose that I am. Conversation is easy as it always is, it's just a different setting to my back garden, that's how I'm rationalizing it in my head. We're pressed side to side. He can't shuffle any closer if he wanted to, but even that's not enough for this show apparently because every now and then, he'll lean in to brush his lips against my cheek, or whisper something in my ear then kiss just below the ear lobe, all of which illicits involuntary shivers. At one point I had to bite my tongue to prevent a moan escaping.

"You deserve an Oscar for this performance." 

"Yeah?" He whispers in my ear. "With all the tremors and near moans...", he bites my ear, "... I woulda thought you had a thing for me... But that can't be right, can it Mel? Not when you keep reminding me that your immune to my charms..."
 
Shit!

"I am immune to your charms, I still remember the..."

"The pissing on the wall incident, yes you keep reminding me. Perhaps acting is your vocation Mel, you're being very realistic. You should take it up."

"Yeah, well with mom and everything, maybe I'll stick to something a bit more stable."

"Right. Well I'm gonna kiss you now."

"What?! We didn't agree to kissing!!"

"We didn't not agree to kissing. I don't do anything by halves, and she's just walked in with her girlfriends, so pucker up and relax. God you look so tense, chill it's just a kiss."

It's just a kiss he says. Arghhhhhhhh I'm so frustrated right now, and he just keeps smirking at me. By the end of this night he will end up with a black eye if he doesn't stop that. And what's she doing here anyway? Isn't she meant to be heartbroken, in bed and crying?
 
I ask Chris just that, and he says, "She knew we'd be here."

"How?" I demand.

"Jen's here."

Ahhh. Jen's like a gossip radio station; if she knows something about anyone, chances are the rest of the school would know about it within the day. Which would explain Chris's extra canoodling. Either way, I guess there's gonna be a confrontation. I don't do confrontation. If I have one aim in life, it's to go through this existence of mine confrontation free.

"Relax."

" Stop telling me to fucking rela..."

He cuts me off with a swift kiss, which leaves me wide-eyed.

"If I knew it was that easy to shut you up..." he chuckles. Then he leans in slowly, effectively letting me know that he's about to do it again, properly, if the intent in his eyes is anything to go by.

His lips feather mine, and I can't help closing my eyes. Looking at him as he's kissing me would almost feel too intimate. He always says I'm an open book, and I can't let him read me right now, not if I want this friendship to remain intact. His hands are suddenly entangled in my hair as he deepens the kiss, nibbling at my lower lip, then soothing it with a swipe of his tongue, demanding access. I part my lips and his tongue plunges in, seeking my inner folds, this time I can't stop a moan escaping.

I've never been kissed like this before. Dear God what have I gotten myself into?! So much for weaning myself off of him; because now that I've had a taste, I'm officially an addict. The need for air gets too strong to ignore, and I reluctantly withdraw. His hands slowly untangle from my hair. 

I give my self a minute to compose myself, then open my eyes slowly. When I look up, I notice he's looking past my shoulder, a little smirk tugging his kiss bruised lips.

Sky. Funny how a kiss can give you instant momentary amnesia. But my memories just come crashing back, landing quite heavily where my hearts supposed to be. The kiss that was earth- shattering for me, was an act for him. As he said it would be. I just, maybe, hoped it would have affected him if only a little bit  How I wish my stupidity would leave on vacation or something, give my poor brain a chance to function. I have a headache all of a sudden. Thinking too much does that to me. The heartless prick is twirling strands of my hair around his fingers, leaning close and sniffing it like a dog.  Ok, so if we weren't pretending, I would've thought it was romantic. 
Two faced you say? Sue me. On a serious note, this is day one of three weeks. If one day is causing me this much trauma, how am I going to last the rest of the duration without having some sort of mental breakdown? I can feel the little monkeys that reside in my head going literally up the wall from too much stimuli.

What do I do?! Help!       

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