Untitled (See A/N inside!)

Thanks so much everyone for the positive feedback! I really appreciate it, and am glad everyone’s liking it so far! I hope you enjoy this one, too, although I’m worried the pacing on THIS chapter is a little off… I wanted to establish this stuff as soon as I could though… Once again, please read and review, and let me know of any errors you find, okay?
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Landon and Hannah spent most of the morning doing laundry and working on the garden in the backyard. They talked a lot, about school and Hannah’s friends. Around lunch time they went out to eat at the little diner by Dean’s work, then stopped in to see him and bring him lunch. Then Landon stopped at the bookstore, hoping to find something new to read. Hannah headed down to the little boutique at the end of the strip mall Landon’s favorite bookshop was in, and when he went to collect her, she somehow conned him into buying her a new pair of sunglasses. She wore them on the way home, grinning to herself.

They sat around in the den and played Tetris on Landon’s old Super Nintendo, and after a few rounds Hannah did a pretty good job of stomping him. When they grew tired of the game, Hannah went upstairs to her room and Landon went out onto the front porch. He read through the paper, then sat and watched the sky for a while. It was very clear, like usual after a pretty bad storm, and he lost an indeterminate amount of time just sitting there.

Abby picked up Eleanor from school that day, and when they got home, he made everyone sandwiches and they sat on the front stairs as they ate. Eleanor talked nonstop, entertaining them with her story of the boy in her class that liked her. She thought he was disgusting, but she was intuitive enough to know that his attention was flattering.

“Uncle Lannie?” Eleanor said as they were going back inside. “Can we get a dog?”

“Dad’s allergic, Ellie.” Hannah told her with a scowl. “You know that.”

“How about a cat?” Eleanor suggested.

“It’s pet dander he’s allergic to.” Abby put in. “So any animal with fur is out of the question.”

“There are dogs with hair instead of fur.” Landon told them, “So they don’t have dander. But I don‘t-”

“And there’s hairless cats.” Eleanor added, grinning.

“That’s disgusting.” Hannah snapped. “No way. I heard you have to lotion them in the summer or their skin cracks and bleeds.”

“Eww.” Abby wrinkled her nose.

“Listen.” Landon said, putting his hands on his hips. “No offense, but I’ve got enough to do around here without some animal I have to clean up after. Even if you Dad said yes, there’s no way I’d consent to getting a pet, and you know your father would listen to me. You want an animal, get a fish.”

Eleanor sighed dramatically. “Well, at least I have Bump.” she muttered, making Hannah burst out laughing.

Landon rolled his eyes. “All right you guys, go amuse yourselves for a while.”

“You want me to teach how you the sewing machine works?” Abby asked him.

“Sure.” Landon agreed, and followed her up to her room.

An hour later, he was pretty sure that learning how to sew was the stupidest idea he’d ever had.

“You’re hopeless, Uncle Lannie.” Abby giggled, watching him struggle with the sewing machine. “You should really just give up.”

“I think I’m starting to agree with you.” he muttered, glaring at the evil contraption. He flipped it the middle finger, sending Abby into squeals of laughter. “I’ll leave the sewing to you, sweetness.” he said, flashing her a smile. She nodded, and he moved so she could set right what he screwed up. “How was school?” he asked sitting, sitting down on the edge of her bed.

“Fine.” she said with a shrug. He picked up on her tone immediately; she was very easy to read.

“What happened?” he asked, and she looked up at him, her bottom lip caught between her teeth. He wondered if this was a family habit. Every Masters seemed to this when they were nervous or worried.

“Oh, nothing.” she said with a little shrug. “I just…” she paused, frowning. “Can I ask you something really personal?”

“Of course.” He knew she was more comfortable with him than with her father, not because he was just her uncle, but because they were so close in age. “You can ask me anything.” he seemed to be saying this a lot lately.

She sighed and sat back in her chair, pushing her hair back from her face. “How did you know you liked boys?” she asked. “I mean, when did you…” she scowled.

He studied her carefully. “Abby, are you-”

“There’s this girl.” she blurted out, flushing. “Josie.”

“Cute name.” Landon remarked, and she half smiled. “You like her?”

“She likes me.” Abby clarified, and he nodded. “She’s in a lot of my clubs, and on the tennis team too. Everyone knows she’s gay, I mean, she doesn’t really make it a secret.”

“Does it bother you?” he asked her. “That she likes you like that?”

She shook her head. “That’s what I don’t get. I… I feel weird around her. Like I want to…” she glanced at him, blushing again. “I’m confused.”

He patted the bed beside him, and she came over and sat down. She rested her head on his shoulder and he looped his arm around her. “Sweetness, if you think that maybe you could like this girl in a more than friendly matter, there’s nothing wrong with it.”

“I know that.” she said softly. “I’m worried about Dad. And what if it’s just like… a phase?”

He snorted laughter and she lifted her head to glare at him. “I’m sorry.” he said, and then laughed again. “There’s nothing wrong with going through an experimental phase, Abby. You’re almost seventeen years old. So long as you’re careful, and you know what you’re doing, then everything will be fine. Your father will not disown you for exploring a little, and as long as they’re your choices, and no one else’s, then you have every right to want what you want.” he smiled and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. “Is she pretty?”

Abby pinked and nodded, her mouth pulling into a little smile. “She’s beautiful.”

“Would you like me to talk to Dean?” he asked, and she hugged him.

“Thank you.” she said against his shoulder. “I’m so worried about Daddy, and I didn’t want to make things worse.”

“I know, sweetness.” he said softly, petting her hair. “He’ll be okay.”

“He’s so hurt.” she pulled back, frowning. “He’s different now.” she studied Landon carefully. “You think he won’t mind if maybe I went out on a date with Josie?”

“He’ll be fine with it, I promise.” he assured her. “I’ll talk to him after dinner. Why don’t you finish up with that mess-” he gestured at the sewing machine, making her laugh, “-and then call her?”

“Okay.” she kissed his cheek. “You’re the best.”

“Sure am.” he winked at her, then got up and left her room. He checked in on Hannah, who was laying on her bed, her headphones on, reading through a magazine. She waved at him, not bothering to take off her headphones. He waved back and then shut the door, moving down the hall to check on Eleanor.

She was sitting cross legged on the floor, her back to the door. Bump was sitting beside her, wearing a top hat. Eleanor had a tiara perched on top of her black hair and was ordering her stuffed animals around in a queenly manner. He bit back a chuckle and shut the door as silently as he could, careful not to disturb her. As he went downstairs, he checked his watch. Dean would be home soon.

He had thrown together pasta salad for dinner, so all he had to do was warm up some bread in the oven. The house was sparkling clean, and he’d finished his book. He stood in the kitchen, unsure of what to do. He liked to keep himself busy; it kept his brain from doing too much. As he was standing there, feeling lost, the phone rang. He jumped, startled, and moved to answer it.

“Masters residence.” he said automatically in the receiver.

“May I speak with Landon Crowe please?” the voice was male, pleasant, familiar.

“This is.” Landon said, frowning, trying to place the voice.

“This Bryce Strong, Eleanor’s teacher.”

“Oh.” Landon said stupidly. “Uh, hi.”

Bryce chuckled. “Hello. Do you have a moment, Mr. Crowe?”

“Just Landon’s fine, and yes, I guess I’ve got some time. What can I do for you?” he leaned against the wall beside the phone, cradling the receiver against his shoulder and folding his arms across his chest.

“Well, I was hoping you’d like to accompany me to dinner this Friday.” Bryce said coolly.

Landon twitched, dropping the phone. It swung on it’s cord and smacked the wall hard. He snatched it, embarrassed at his own clumsiness, and pressed it against his ear, his face red. He opened his mouth, but all that came out was a rather dumb sounding, “Huh?”

Bryce paused. “I’m sorry, did I make a mistake? I thought you-”

“No, no, you didn‘t.” Landon said, and heard the teacher sigh softly. “I just… what?”

Bryce chuckled again. “I’m asking you out on a date, Landon.” he said softly. “I know it’s a little out of the blue, and I’m kind of nervous, so it’s not exactly going the way I planned, but-”

“Okay.” Landon said, and Bryce went silent. “Friday?”

“Yes.”

“What did you have in mind?” Landon wondered what the hell he was doing. Bryce wasn’t exactly his type. He had no idea who this guy was, really, other than the fact that he taught first grade and had a pretty weird handshake.

“Dinner?” Bryce suggested. “Do you like Thai?”

“Sure. Did you have a specific place in mind?” he asked. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hannah standing in the doorway, watching him. He covered the mouthpiece and looked at her. “Kiddo, can you get me a pen and paper from that drawer?” he gestured, and she did as he asked. “Thanks.”

Bryce rattled off the address, and he scribbled it down. He also took Bryce’s cell phone number, and agreed to meet him at eight on Friday night. When he hung up, he felt amused but a little disoriented.

“Do you have a date?” Hannah asked him.

“Uh yea, I guess I do.” he said, and chuckled, shaking his head in wonder.

“With who?” she asked, snatching the paper from his hand. “Your handwriting sucks.”

“Eleanor’s teacher.” he said, and Hannah gave him a curious look. “What?”

“Is that allowed?” she asked, and he laughed.

The front door slammed, and Dean bellowed, “I’m home!” like he always did. Hannah shot Landon mischievous little smirk, then turned on her heel and went flying out of the kitchen screaming, “Uncle Lannie’s going on a daaaaaaate!”

He winced and followed after her. Little brat, he thought to himself as he round the corner into the main hall. “Hannah, give me the-” he stopped short at the sight of Dean. He looked, in a word, murderous.

“A date?” Dean said, sounding far more pleasant than his expression suggested. “With who?”

“Bryce Strong.” Landon told him. “Ellie’s teacher.” Before Dean could say anything else, he pointed at Hannah and barked, “Paper. Now.” Hannah handed it over, still smirking. He glared at Dean. “Don’t you and her have something to talk about?” he asked.

Dean’s face crumpled for a split second, but then he set his jaw and nodded. He looked down at his middle daughter. “Hannah, can we go up to your room and talk for a little bit? It’s important.” Hannah cast Landon a knowing look, then nodded at her father. “Okay, honey. Let me change, and then I’ll be up.” he watched her go up the stairs before turning to Landon. “You and I need to talk, too.” he practically growled, and Landon fought the overwhelming urge to give him the same hand gesture he had the sewing machine earlier. He shrugged and watched Dean stomp away.

Sighing, he went out on the front porch and sat on the bench. The rain had continued through the night and most of the day. Now, the sky was overcast and darkening a little, but the temperature was comfortable enough. He sat with his legs pulled up, his arms around his knees, and thought about what he’d just agreed to. He couldn’t recall the last date he’d been on. Since Zach, he hadn’t bothered at all. Why had he said yes to Bryce? Was he just lonely? He thought perhaps that was part of it, but maybe not all of it. He knew that his growing, yet well repressed, feelings for Dean were just going to cause problems. If he could divert his own attention towards someone else, things might smooth out. God knew his life was stressful enough as it was.

He closed his eyes, recalling Bryce in his mind. He was an attractive man, certainly. Landon could appreciate the sharpness of him, although he was thinner, and shorter, than he usually liked his men. He also preferred dark over light, and Bryce was anything but dark. Still, when Landon really tried, he could certainly find some physical things about Bryce to get worked up about. And the man seemed pleasant enough… you had to be pleasant, Landon suspected, to be a good elementary teacher. Again, he wondered how old Bryce was.

Abruptly, it occurred to him that he had no idea what to wear for this date. He sighed and stood up, heading into the house and upstairs. He dug through his clothes, finding an old but still nice pair of khakis. After a lot more digging, he came up with a long sleeves shirt that fit him well. He didn’t like the color; greens never looked right on him, but it would do. He set the outfit aside and turned, nearly face planting directly into Dean’s chest.

“Fuck!” he shouted, startled. How the hell did this family manage to get up those stairs without making a single sound? “Don’t do that!” he stepped back awkwardly, glaring at his brother-in-law.

“You can’t date Eleanor’s teacher, Lan.” he said, ignoring Landon’s reaction.

Landon quirked an eyebrow. “Oh, I can’t, huh?” he said haughtily, putting his hands on his hips. “Are you forbidding it?”

Dean rolled his eyes and folded him arms across his chest. “Landon, don’t start getting defensive. I just think-”

“I don’t care what you think.” Landon snapped, and Dean glowered at him. “It’s a date, Dean, not me picking up a hooker and-”

“Stop it.” Landon sighed and wandered over to the window. “How are you going to explain to Eleanor that you’re screwing her teacher?”

Landon scoffed and shot him a dirty look. “I don’t know if you know this or not, Dean, but all gay males are not sluts. We don’t want to sleep with anything that happens to have a dick, and I’m not the type to fuck on the first date. It’s dinner. That’s it. Why are you so pissed?”

Dean raked one hand through his hair and glared down at his feet. To Landon, he looked very much like a pouting child. “Things are just starting to settle down around here.” he said quietly. “I don’t want stuff to get bad again, and I’m worried that if you start spending time outside of the house-”

“What?” Landon cut in, and Dean looked up at him. “You might actually have to start acting like a father again?”

Dean’s jaw clenched and his hands dropped to his sides, curling into fists. “Fuck you.” he spat.

Landon rolled his eyes. “Mature, Dean, really.” he walked over, just as angry as Dean looked. “You’re overreacting, and treating me like a child, which is funny, considering the fact that I’ve been raising yours for the last three months. Now I’m going to explain this to you once, and only once. Are you listening carefully, Dean?”

Dean said nothing, but he jerked his head up and then down once. Landon nodded in return.

“That’s good, because this is important.” he licked his lips and spoke very calmly and very clearly. “I’m doing you a favor. I stayed here after Maddy left because those girls needed me, because you needed me. I’ve let you pout and whine and sulk because Maddy fucked you up, and I get it. You know I get it.” Dean’s face was very slowly softening. “I know I’m young, Dean. I know you haven’t always trusted me. But you need to have a complete grasp of just how out of fucking line you are right now. So I will lay down this rule, right here and now. I will date who I want to date. I will fuck who I want to fuck. I will do whatever the fuck I please, and as long as the girls aren’t in danger and I’m not sponging off of you for anything without holding up my end, you will stay the hell out of my choices. If you can’t handle that, then I’ll leave, and you can pick up all the pieces yourself.” he searched Dean’s face carefully. “Do you understand me, Dean?”

Dean sighed and nodded, looking away. “I understand you, Landon.” he said quietly. “You’re right.”

“I know.” Landon said. “That’s why I said it.”

Dean shot him a warning look, then closed his eyes and rubbed at his temples. “I’m sorry.”

“Okay.” Land reached up and patted Dean’s shoulder. “We’re okay?” Dean nodded. “Good.” he dropped his hand. “How did the talk with Hannah go?” he asked.

Dean sighed and shrugged. “Okay, I guess. I told her what I could. She asked some questions, and we talked about her problems in school. I think things will get better from here.”

Landon smiled. “That’s good to hear.” they stood in awkward silence for a moment, and then Landon asked, “Ready for dinner?”

Dean nodded, looking grateful, and they went downstairs.
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“I’m sorry for snapping at you yesterday.” Landon said quietly, looking at Dean, who was sprawled comfortably out on the couch. It was Thursday now, and the three girls were all at Abby’s best friend Carol’s house for a sleepover. They had no school tomorrow, and Carol’s mom was taking the girls out all day. Dean got home and started drinking. Now, it was almost ten, and he was pretty nicely in the bag.

Dean rolled one shoulder in a shrug. “It’s fine, I deserved it.” he said. “Telling you how to live.” he snorted and looked blearily up and Landon, who was standing in the archway that led into the den. “I was a dick yesterday.”

“You’ve avoided me all day.” Landon said, and Dean sighed and looked away. “You’re still mad.”

“No, I feel like an ass.” Dean told him. “I thought you were mad at me.”

“I’m over it.”

“Come sit down.” Dean offered.

Landon hesitated, then came and perched on the edge of the couch. “There’s something else we need to talk about.” he said, and Dean groaned and covered his eyes with the hand not holding a beer. “It’s about Abby.”

“Oh God, what now?” Dean asked, not uncovering his eyes. “She’s the good one.”

“Eleanor’s the good one.” Landon said. “Abby’s just careful with her bad behavior and doesn’t get caught, like Hannah.”

“What happened?” Dean asked, removing his hand from his eyes and dropping it onto his chest. “Is she pregnant?” he asked this as a joke, but Landon caught the worry in his eyes.

Landon chuckled. “Actually, what’s going on with her will pretty much guarantee that won’t happen any time soon.” he said, and Dean looked confused. “Abby wants to go on a date.”

“And that makes sure she’s not going to get knocked up how?” Dean asked, sitting up a little straighter.

“She’d be going on this date with a kid from school. Named Josie.”

“What the fuck kind of name…” Dean trailed off, his slightly pickled brain slowly putting two and two together. “Oh.” he said softly, staring up at the ceiling. “Wow. Really?”

“Yea. She talked to me about it yesterday. I told her I’d mention it to you since she’s so worried about you lately.”

Dean sighed. “My girl shouldn’t have to worry about me.” he muttered, and sipped his beer. “That’s fucked up.”

“Well, it’s a fucked up situation.” Landon said with a shrug. “I assured her that you’d be just fine with her dating a girl.”

“I don’t like all this dating going on.” Dean complained. “This sucks.”

“Well, tough shit.” Landon told firmly, but he was grinning. “You’re just going to have to suck it up and deal.”

“Guess so.” Dean mumbled.

Landon studied him. “You’re okay with this, aren’t you? With Abby?”

He shrugged. “Sure, why not? I mean, like you said yesterday, you’ve been raising her lately. Should’ve known it would rub off on one of them.”

This off handed remark hurt Landon more than he expected it to. He looked away from his brother-in-law, restraining from leaning over and punching him in the mouth. He balled his hands into fists in his lap and kept silent. Dean chuckled to himself, and Landon bit down on his tongue keep his myriad of scathing retorts to himself.

Dean stretched, yawning. “Think I might call it a night.” he said, then drained the rest of his beer. “Kind of tired.”

“Kind of drunk.” Landon corrected.

“Same difference.” Dean muttered with a shrug. He gave Landon a long, hard look, then smiled. “You could do with getting drunk once in a while.”

Landon shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t drink anymore.” he said vaguely.

Dean nodded. “Yea. You quit, huh? Like the cigarettes?” Landon nodded. “Weird. I thought I saw a pint of Jack in one of your drawers yesterday.”

Landon half smiled. “There’s a pack of Camels in there, too. Just in case.”

“That why you keep that ash tray in your room?” Landon nodded again. “Isn’t that tempting?”

“No.” Landon told him. “It actually keeps me from wanting them. I don‘t know, it‘s like, if I know I can‘t have it, no matter what, it makes it harder. Wanting something and knowing it‘s sitting right there, it makes it easier to convince myself I don‘t really need it” he snorted and shook his head. “Wish everything was like that.”

“What do you mean?” Dean asked, tilting his head to one side.

Landon sighed. “Nothing.” he muttered. Dean was staring at him strangely. “What?”

Dean half smiled. “Nothing.” he said. Landon rolled his eyes. Dean stood up. “I’m heading to bed.”

“All right. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night, Lan.”

“Night.”

Landon sat there on the couch, not really thinking, for a long time. Finally, he got up and headed upstairs. On the second floor he stopped, frowning. He heard something. He tilted his head, listening carefully.

Dean was crying.

Landon flinched at the realization, looking at Dean’s closed bedroom door, his brow furrowed. He considered for a moment, then walked over and opened the door. He didn’t knock, because he knew Dean would simply pretend to be asleep. As it was, just coming in earned him an evil glare. Dean was sitting at the foot of his bed, his elbows on his knees.

“What the hell do you want?” he muttered thickly, and Landon simply walked over, sat down beside him, and put his hand on his back, between his shoulder blades. Dean shuddered, his head lowering. “I’m sorry.” he mumbled, wiping at his nose with the back of his hand. “You don’t have to-”

“Stop.” Landon said gently. He put his arms around Dean’s neck and pulled until Dean pressed his face against Landon’s shoulder. He shuddered again, letting out a quiet hiccupping sob. “It’s fine.”

“No it’s not.” Dean told him, sounding sort of childish. “Nothing’s fine. Everything’s so fucked up and I can’t…” he sniffled loudly. “Goddamnit.” He started to cry again, hard, and Landon sat there with his arms around his brother-in-law, one hand sliding up and down Dean’s spine, trying to comfort. He knew it wasn’t much. After what seemed like a very long time, Dean pulled away, now down to nothing more than sniffles.

“Oh, that stupid bitch.” he whispered, and let out a desperate, miserable sounding laugh. He looked at Landon, his eyes wide and bloodshot. “I wish I could hate her, Landon.” he put one hand over his eyes and shuddered. “I wish I could fucking stop.”

“I know.” Landon said softly. He still had his hand on the small of Dean’s back.

Dean sighed and tossed himself backwards onto the bed, and Landon moved his hand just in time. “I’m tired.” he said, and Landon stood up. “Tomorrow.” Dean said, not specifying anything. “Okay?”

“Sure.” Landon headed for the door. He stopped and turned back with his hand on the knob. “Dean?”

Dean glowered up at the ceiling. “What?” he asked, sounding blank.

Landon paused, unsure of how to say what he wanted to. “If you…” he stopped, frowning. Dean sat up on his elbows and looked at him, his eyebrows drawn together. “If you can’t let it go for you, do it for the girls. Maddy’s not coming back. Not for you, and not for them. It’s just how it works.”

For a long time, Dean said nothing. Then he half smiled and shook his head. “You know, the worst part of it is that I know, deep down, that if she did, I wouldn’t even hesitate.”

Landon nodded. “Good night, Dean.” he left the room, shutting the door behind him. He went upstairs, undressed, and climbed into his hammock. He laid there in the dark, thinking about Dean, and about the bottle in his drawer.