Love and Deceit
folder
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
13
Views:
1,637
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
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Currently Reading:
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Category:
Angst › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
13
Views:
1,637
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The Author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Carter and Me
Chapter 2: Carter and Me.
I went to the hospital, teddy bear in hand; ready to see my little brother Adrian. When I walked to the sick kid’s wing, all the nurses were rushing over to me with greetings. They were like vultures ready to swoop down on a corpse; only, in this case, they were all over my cute face.
After being held up for at least ten minutes, I was finally free to see Adrian. I knocked on the door and went into his room. He was asleep, looking like a little angel. I mean, come on, who wouldn’t look like an angel when you’re 8 and resemble me?
I gently nudged him awake and he was so happy to see me. “Chris!” he said, “I missed you!”
“I missed you too little man.” What’s a brother to do? I see him every day, but it’s hard when you’re alone in a hospital.
“I got something for you.” I gave him the teddy bear and his face lit up. He was so excited, but then he looked at me suspiciously.
“Did something good happen?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“Did something good happen? You only ever get me anything when you win a competition or when it’s my birthday. It’s not my birthday today and I know the days of your competitions better than you do.”
Um… okay, I’m a little embarrassed to admit this, but it’s true. The kid does know the days of my competitions better than I do, but that’s only because I keep my schedule with him. I know I’d loose it if I kept it. But he has a sixth sense, I swear.
“Did you meet someone?”
How the hell did he know that? “Um… yeah, you could say that. How did you know?”
“You’re blushing.”
“Oh.”
***
I left the hospital in even higher spirits. The two of us talked for hours, and the only reason I left was because the nurses shooed be out. Visiting hours were over.
So I went home.
There is a pool in the building where my apartment is and the owner knows that I swim. He always keeps the pool open for only me after hours so that I can get my hours in. I tend to swim laps for about two hours every night, and four when I have a competition the next day.
Today was no different. I finished my two hours, took a shower and went to bed. I slept like a log that night for the first time in a while. I usually don’t get a good night’s sleep because my head is always filled with worry. But today, I don’t know weather it was because of Carter or my brother doing well, but I slept so well.
***
The next day, I had gone to the construction sight as usual, black car there at the same time as always, only, this time, it was a little different. Instead of leaving at the time it normally did, when I finished work, Carter got out of it. I was rather surprised. It was his car. He was the one who would always be at the construction sight. Kind of freaky if you ask me.
We went to the coffee shop again, and people still took a second look at us when we walked through the doors. I was still a little uncomfortable, but I came to ignore it, and pretty soon, the whole thing just died down. No one cared about Carter bringing me around anymore. I didn’t complain; it made me feel better.
Carter was a good guy. I really liked him and he seemed to be very fond of me. We would talk about lots of things and would laugh at each others jokes. I guess that was what you would call a “relationship” right? I wouldn’t know; I never had one before.
Soon, I trusted him enough to invite him over to my house. Although I was rather embarrassed about showing it to him, he didn’t seem to mind it. On the contrary, he was rather charmed by it. However, I never let him visit my little brother, and never told him too much about me. I kept that much private.
I also ended up inviting him to a swimming competition that I had. It was the first time he had ever been to one and he was impressed with the whole atmosphere. I signed myself up for three rounds: The men’s hundred meter sprint, the men’s two hundred meter butterfly, and the men’s two hundred meter breast stroke. I won each one of those competitions and a total three thousand dollars.
He was the loudest cheerer when I won. I had a few fans whenever I swam. They would always come to see me, and cheer for me but, this time, he was the best. He took me out to dinner to celebrate my win, and my birthday which happened to be the same day. It was so great spending time with him. It was then that I started to realize that I was falling in love with him.
I had the courage to ask him how old he was. It seemed kind of weird that a 17 year old was going out with a man whose age he didn’t even know. When I asked, he chuckled, “I was wondering when you were going to ask me that. My own birthday was a few months ago. I just turned 26.”
That’s not bad right? He could pull off being 24 and I was kind of surprised to hear that he was older. So, after dinner, we went back to my place. Once inside my apartment, I was caught completely off guard when he pressed my body to the closed door, pinned me there with his own and kissed me deeply. It scared me and I tried to pull away, but what scared me even more was when he started to run his hands up and down my body.
“Stop” I gasped, “what are you doing?”
“Making you feel good.” He tells me.
“Please… please stop!” I shoved him away from me, and he fell to the floor. My shirt was opened and the belt of my pants was unbuckled. I was breathing hard, and he looked at me in surprise. I felt tears run down my face as I slid to the floor. I hugged my knees and cried in them. I heard him crawl to me. When he put a hand on my shoulder, I flinched.
“I’m sorry.” He said in a low voice, “I thought you wanted this. I misread the signs. I’m sorry”
He held me close to him and soothed my sobs. As much as I wanted to break away from him, his arms were warm and I couldn’t bring myself to leave the shelter. His voice was soothing and sincere. “It’s alright.” I told him, “You just caught me off guard. I’m not ready for this kind of thing yet.”
The thing is: I really liked this man. I loved him, I trusted him, and I wanted him… but I was afraid of him, afraid of myself. I was scared that if I lost myself in him, I wouldn’t know what to do with my brother. I was afraid that I might abandon my brother so I can be with Carter… I couldn’t do that… not when I vowed to protect Adrian and help him. I vowed to devote my life to keeping him safe from harm.
So, stupid me, I felt I could trust Carter enough to tell him what was going on with my life. I made the decision to stop seeing him, and he deserved to know why.
“Carter, I have a little brother who is sick. The reason I work at the construction sight and swim so much is because I need money to pay for his medical bills. My parents died a few years ago, and we are all we have left. I vowed to protect him so… I think it would be best if I stopped seeing you.”
“I really like you, you know? But I can’t let myself be happy while he suffers. I need to concentrate on helping him get better. I can’t keep going out with you because it makes my mind wander from what is really important to me. I’m sorry. You understand, right?”
The look on his face was strange. It was a mixture of hurt, confusion, sadness, but at the same time, amusement. It was all apparent in his blue and green eyes. He looked at me and just stared for a while as if trying to decide what he was going to say. “I understand.” The words were hollow, without emotion, monotone. It sent a sudden chill through my body as he got up and helped me up off the floor. “I’ll see you soon.” With that, he left my apartment, leaving me to stare back at him.
***
A week past without so much as a hello from Carter. His car stopped coming to the construction site, and left me feeling a little lonely. I know I said that I should stop seeing him, but I couldn’t help but feel sad when I didn’t see him.
Even my little brother noticed the difference in me.
Whenever I would go to the hospital, he would always ask me if I was alright. I never really knew how my brother could read me. I didn’t think I was that transparent. I guess it was because we knew each other so well.
“Does this have something to do with Mr. Carter?” he asked me one day. The question caught me by surprise. I never told Adrian about Carter. I didn’t even think he knew that I was seeing someone.
“How do you know this man?” I asked him.
He looked a little shy to reply, but also happy. “He comes to visit me sometimes. He has been since last month. He says he is your friend. I like him a lot Chris, he is very nice and brings me candy.”
“Really?” I couldn’t believe it. I only told Carter about my little brother the previous week and have been very careful not to say anything about my private life before that. How could he have known?
As if on cue, Carter walked through the doors of Adrian’s room, carrying a box of, what looked to be, Rocky Road fudge, Adrian’s favorite. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me, clearly surprised.
He smiled; I was pissed. “Can I borrow him for a minute Adrian?” I asked my brother as Carter put the candy on the bed.
“Uh huh.” Adrian began stuffing his face with the fudge as I dragged Carter outside the room and closed the door behind me so that Adrian could not hear what I was saying.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked him, my face red with anger.
“Bringing your adorable little brother some candy. What does it look like?”
“I only told you about my brother last week, yet he says that you have been paying him visits since last month. How did you know I had a brother if I never told you anything about it?”
The look on his face when I confronted him angered me even more. But his response is what made me furious. With a simple smile of amusement, he told me: “I know more about you than you think. I know that your brother was born prematurely and has an under developed heart. Hence why he is often sick and in the hospital. I also know that your parents died in a plane crash and you have no direct family to take care of you. I know that you insisted on paying his medical bills yourself even though the orphanage you stayed at offered to do it for you, and I know that you dropped out of school in order to balance your construction job and swimming schedule. I have done lots of research on you, my dear Chris. I know your whole life’s history. I also know that your brother needs a heart transplant or else he won’t live to see your next birthday.”
Although I was shocked the whole time he told me this news, I was even more shocked about this last piece of information. Why hadn’t I heard of this before? However, my furiousness took the best of me, and I acted before going to confirm the news. “Stay away from me.” I told Carter. “I don’t ever want to see you again. Stay the hell away from me and my little brother.”
With that, I walked away from Carter, never to see him again… or so I thought.
I went to the hospital, teddy bear in hand; ready to see my little brother Adrian. When I walked to the sick kid’s wing, all the nurses were rushing over to me with greetings. They were like vultures ready to swoop down on a corpse; only, in this case, they were all over my cute face.
After being held up for at least ten minutes, I was finally free to see Adrian. I knocked on the door and went into his room. He was asleep, looking like a little angel. I mean, come on, who wouldn’t look like an angel when you’re 8 and resemble me?
I gently nudged him awake and he was so happy to see me. “Chris!” he said, “I missed you!”
“I missed you too little man.” What’s a brother to do? I see him every day, but it’s hard when you’re alone in a hospital.
“I got something for you.” I gave him the teddy bear and his face lit up. He was so excited, but then he looked at me suspiciously.
“Did something good happen?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“Did something good happen? You only ever get me anything when you win a competition or when it’s my birthday. It’s not my birthday today and I know the days of your competitions better than you do.”
Um… okay, I’m a little embarrassed to admit this, but it’s true. The kid does know the days of my competitions better than I do, but that’s only because I keep my schedule with him. I know I’d loose it if I kept it. But he has a sixth sense, I swear.
“Did you meet someone?”
How the hell did he know that? “Um… yeah, you could say that. How did you know?”
“You’re blushing.”
“Oh.”
***
I left the hospital in even higher spirits. The two of us talked for hours, and the only reason I left was because the nurses shooed be out. Visiting hours were over.
So I went home.
There is a pool in the building where my apartment is and the owner knows that I swim. He always keeps the pool open for only me after hours so that I can get my hours in. I tend to swim laps for about two hours every night, and four when I have a competition the next day.
Today was no different. I finished my two hours, took a shower and went to bed. I slept like a log that night for the first time in a while. I usually don’t get a good night’s sleep because my head is always filled with worry. But today, I don’t know weather it was because of Carter or my brother doing well, but I slept so well.
***
The next day, I had gone to the construction sight as usual, black car there at the same time as always, only, this time, it was a little different. Instead of leaving at the time it normally did, when I finished work, Carter got out of it. I was rather surprised. It was his car. He was the one who would always be at the construction sight. Kind of freaky if you ask me.
We went to the coffee shop again, and people still took a second look at us when we walked through the doors. I was still a little uncomfortable, but I came to ignore it, and pretty soon, the whole thing just died down. No one cared about Carter bringing me around anymore. I didn’t complain; it made me feel better.
Carter was a good guy. I really liked him and he seemed to be very fond of me. We would talk about lots of things and would laugh at each others jokes. I guess that was what you would call a “relationship” right? I wouldn’t know; I never had one before.
Soon, I trusted him enough to invite him over to my house. Although I was rather embarrassed about showing it to him, he didn’t seem to mind it. On the contrary, he was rather charmed by it. However, I never let him visit my little brother, and never told him too much about me. I kept that much private.
I also ended up inviting him to a swimming competition that I had. It was the first time he had ever been to one and he was impressed with the whole atmosphere. I signed myself up for three rounds: The men’s hundred meter sprint, the men’s two hundred meter butterfly, and the men’s two hundred meter breast stroke. I won each one of those competitions and a total three thousand dollars.
He was the loudest cheerer when I won. I had a few fans whenever I swam. They would always come to see me, and cheer for me but, this time, he was the best. He took me out to dinner to celebrate my win, and my birthday which happened to be the same day. It was so great spending time with him. It was then that I started to realize that I was falling in love with him.
I had the courage to ask him how old he was. It seemed kind of weird that a 17 year old was going out with a man whose age he didn’t even know. When I asked, he chuckled, “I was wondering when you were going to ask me that. My own birthday was a few months ago. I just turned 26.”
That’s not bad right? He could pull off being 24 and I was kind of surprised to hear that he was older. So, after dinner, we went back to my place. Once inside my apartment, I was caught completely off guard when he pressed my body to the closed door, pinned me there with his own and kissed me deeply. It scared me and I tried to pull away, but what scared me even more was when he started to run his hands up and down my body.
“Stop” I gasped, “what are you doing?”
“Making you feel good.” He tells me.
“Please… please stop!” I shoved him away from me, and he fell to the floor. My shirt was opened and the belt of my pants was unbuckled. I was breathing hard, and he looked at me in surprise. I felt tears run down my face as I slid to the floor. I hugged my knees and cried in them. I heard him crawl to me. When he put a hand on my shoulder, I flinched.
“I’m sorry.” He said in a low voice, “I thought you wanted this. I misread the signs. I’m sorry”
He held me close to him and soothed my sobs. As much as I wanted to break away from him, his arms were warm and I couldn’t bring myself to leave the shelter. His voice was soothing and sincere. “It’s alright.” I told him, “You just caught me off guard. I’m not ready for this kind of thing yet.”
The thing is: I really liked this man. I loved him, I trusted him, and I wanted him… but I was afraid of him, afraid of myself. I was scared that if I lost myself in him, I wouldn’t know what to do with my brother. I was afraid that I might abandon my brother so I can be with Carter… I couldn’t do that… not when I vowed to protect Adrian and help him. I vowed to devote my life to keeping him safe from harm.
So, stupid me, I felt I could trust Carter enough to tell him what was going on with my life. I made the decision to stop seeing him, and he deserved to know why.
“Carter, I have a little brother who is sick. The reason I work at the construction sight and swim so much is because I need money to pay for his medical bills. My parents died a few years ago, and we are all we have left. I vowed to protect him so… I think it would be best if I stopped seeing you.”
“I really like you, you know? But I can’t let myself be happy while he suffers. I need to concentrate on helping him get better. I can’t keep going out with you because it makes my mind wander from what is really important to me. I’m sorry. You understand, right?”
The look on his face was strange. It was a mixture of hurt, confusion, sadness, but at the same time, amusement. It was all apparent in his blue and green eyes. He looked at me and just stared for a while as if trying to decide what he was going to say. “I understand.” The words were hollow, without emotion, monotone. It sent a sudden chill through my body as he got up and helped me up off the floor. “I’ll see you soon.” With that, he left my apartment, leaving me to stare back at him.
***
A week past without so much as a hello from Carter. His car stopped coming to the construction site, and left me feeling a little lonely. I know I said that I should stop seeing him, but I couldn’t help but feel sad when I didn’t see him.
Even my little brother noticed the difference in me.
Whenever I would go to the hospital, he would always ask me if I was alright. I never really knew how my brother could read me. I didn’t think I was that transparent. I guess it was because we knew each other so well.
“Does this have something to do with Mr. Carter?” he asked me one day. The question caught me by surprise. I never told Adrian about Carter. I didn’t even think he knew that I was seeing someone.
“How do you know this man?” I asked him.
He looked a little shy to reply, but also happy. “He comes to visit me sometimes. He has been since last month. He says he is your friend. I like him a lot Chris, he is very nice and brings me candy.”
“Really?” I couldn’t believe it. I only told Carter about my little brother the previous week and have been very careful not to say anything about my private life before that. How could he have known?
As if on cue, Carter walked through the doors of Adrian’s room, carrying a box of, what looked to be, Rocky Road fudge, Adrian’s favorite. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me, clearly surprised.
He smiled; I was pissed. “Can I borrow him for a minute Adrian?” I asked my brother as Carter put the candy on the bed.
“Uh huh.” Adrian began stuffing his face with the fudge as I dragged Carter outside the room and closed the door behind me so that Adrian could not hear what I was saying.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked him, my face red with anger.
“Bringing your adorable little brother some candy. What does it look like?”
“I only told you about my brother last week, yet he says that you have been paying him visits since last month. How did you know I had a brother if I never told you anything about it?”
The look on his face when I confronted him angered me even more. But his response is what made me furious. With a simple smile of amusement, he told me: “I know more about you than you think. I know that your brother was born prematurely and has an under developed heart. Hence why he is often sick and in the hospital. I also know that your parents died in a plane crash and you have no direct family to take care of you. I know that you insisted on paying his medical bills yourself even though the orphanage you stayed at offered to do it for you, and I know that you dropped out of school in order to balance your construction job and swimming schedule. I have done lots of research on you, my dear Chris. I know your whole life’s history. I also know that your brother needs a heart transplant or else he won’t live to see your next birthday.”
Although I was shocked the whole time he told me this news, I was even more shocked about this last piece of information. Why hadn’t I heard of this before? However, my furiousness took the best of me, and I acted before going to confirm the news. “Stay away from me.” I told Carter. “I don’t ever want to see you again. Stay the hell away from me and my little brother.”
With that, I walked away from Carter, never to see him again… or so I thought.