Repitition

Chapter 2
You listen to him tell you about the bar you met him in, a conversation you don’t remember having, and finally he tell you about how you invited him into your apartment for a drink and finally how you seduced him into your bed. You listen to everything the stranger has to tell you, because you don’t remember shit, how much did you have to drink last night anyway? as you watch him put his clothes on to leave you don’t say a word, you watch and realize that he is good looking with broad shoulders, muscles, tan skin, and one of the nicest asses you have ever seen. Then you hear “can I see you again” you wonder what the fuck is he thinking. He leaves because you did not answer. You get up and go take a shower, as the hot water cascades down your naked body you start to remember little pieces from the night before.

You went to see Robert around three in the afternoon, when you got to his apartment you knocked on the door and a woman answered asking you “what do you want”. You see him standing behind her wearing only a towel, you then hear a conversation taking place but you only hear pieces of it “look it was fun but you should leave now” you see the woman leaving but not before giving you a nasty look. He pulls you into his apartment and walks towards his bedroom. You think, is he even going to explain to you about what you just saw, you go after him to ask but before you utter a word he looks at you and says “it does not matter who she is, what are you doing here anyway”. You look at him and you know you are going to cry. He looks at you, takes you in his arms and whispers in your ear “if you don’t like it you can leave, I don’t have to explain shit to you”. He then pushes you away and continues to dress.

You sit on his bed and cry, you don’t remember what time you left but, you know you had a few drinks before you made it to the bar. You remember seeing the stranger, talking to him, what was his name you know it begins with an “M”. You get out of the shower, sit on your bed and weep, minutes later you jump at the ring of the telephone, and a voice asked you are you okay’ you freeze You compose yourself enough to answer “yes”. The voice then asked to come over to talk about last night you don’t want to but in the end you answer “sure”.

You get dressed and wait for him to arrive, when you hear the doorbell your hands begin to shake as you press the buzzer to let him in. He comes upstairs and knocks on the door; you let him in watching as he walks over to sit on your couch. You look at him and hatred fills your heart. You remember the past with the man sitting on your couch, you think to yourself, how many women have an intimate relationship with the man that has raped them. You know that he has broken everything inside you, but he tells you that he loves you and for some reason that you still do not understand, you believe him. You have known him since you were both children, but you think of all the things in your life that’s bad, and you know it’s his fault.