Ameria

"Where, where am I?" I try to open my eyes, but they won’t, only perpetual dark. Am I dead? God, did I die? Is this the end already? My mind starts racing, how did I get here? Where is this? Then my mind snaps back, and I remember. I fell of the cliff and she jumped to save me. I propelled her on the cliff and smashed into the water. Is this what death is like? I hear someone’s voice next to me. I can't make out the words very well, my mind is swimming, but I think they say he is a wake. I can’t distinguish to well but it sounds like a two females. I try to move my hands but I feel a sharp snaking pains. I hear one of them say don't move, you are battered pretty badly, nothings broken, but that I should stay still, and with out I fall back into darkness.
I do not know how long I lay there unconscious all I know is that her words kept playing in my mind like a broken record replaying those sorrowful words that plague my heart she has someone else. Some else, some else how could I have been so stupid? I should have known, should have expected it, and should have known she would not be single but, my heart was not prepared for it. God, it hurts I can not take this pain it is as if someone is viciously tearing into my soul, and devouring it. God, they are devouring it without mercy. Why, Why, Why, I find myself screaming tears streaming down my face. The two voices I heard from before stare at me. I look around but can not figure out where I am. One of the girls walks over to me slowly cautious as if I was some wild beast hungry for food I feel ashamed by my actions, as she sits next to me. Grabs me hugging me tightly, and for some reason I can not pull away. Can’t escape her warm embrace, I just sit there, and cry into her, tears streaming from my face, into her lap like a child crying into their mothers lap. It is amazing, to think that I could cry in front of these complete strangers. After all that I went the harsh beatings every time I showed weakness, that only got worse every time I cried the bruises from the whip that will never leave my back. The memories of the ways they tortured me, tried to degrade me into something less then human, less then animal, something utterly primal. Beating me just so that they could beat me once more for my defiance, for refusing to submit to their twisted will and give up my dignity. Memories, flash back to my mother, how they laughed as they told me I was a demon child, all because my mother died giving birth to me. How the town took turns beating me for her death, both verbally and physically. Remembering how the town owner hit me, when tried to protect a dog from his son, the way my jaw broke. How I ran, and was captured and beating into submission, to become a slave, these painful memories, only fueling my tears, increase the pain coursing through my body. I thought I had found a chance at happiness, when she saved me, took me away from that cruel, evil spirited fate. But now I am not so sure, the pain they made me feel, is nothing compared to the pain I feel right now. It doesn't come close this pain. This pain that is coursing through my heart right now, snaking its way up like a vine into my soul, grasping, suffocating me, utterly without mercy. I sit in her arms and cry endless tears. Until I fall asleep, exhausted in her arms again, not being able to stand up, and sinking into eternal submission. It is amazing how much my life changed with those 5 words. It was like my world was ripped into shreds, as if someone had taken a scythe unto my soul, and hacked away at with blinding accuracy, making sure not to leave a shred of happiness. Then a ray of light sinks into my sleep just barely existing, her words I love you, she said those words with tear filled eyes, she cried that she loved me. But she can not be mine. She has someone else, still god, who is this person who stands in my way who takes away all this joy that I feel in my heart? It is not right it is not fair hahahaha fair ... fair there is no fair in my life. Never was anything fair, but this is just cruel so heartless, so wrong feel so alone so different now. I awaken still cradled in her arms, but this is different. She is beside me, asleep I am in her arms, and I feel so warm so safe. I do not know when I notice that neither of us are wearing cloths, all I know is that is behind me pressed close against me, I can feel her breast in my back. Her nipples eagerly coming up to me, I can feel her legs they are intertwined with mine. Her sweet warm breath gently flowing up the back of my unprotected neck, sending sultry shivers up my spine OMG. I feel her moving against me, she is grinding into me; I do not know whether by choice or by involuntariness, but it feel so good, but yet so wrong. She is not the one I love but yet, she has been trying to reconcile me. I never asked who she was or why, I just knew that she had good intention from the moment we touched. Now she is laying her behind me naked so close I can feel her heartbeat mingling with mine. Rubbing against my body resting her arms around me pulling me closer into her soft warm form. She smells like cherry blossoms and it is not perfume, I can tell it is in her skin, a part of it. The smell is not overly strong like perfume but, a part of her natural scent. It is amazing I have never witnessed something like this before. It is as if she is part of the cherry blossoms themselves. I want to turn around and stare at her but I am afraid. Afraid that I might wake her afraid that she will notice my growing erection, why am I getting a boner the only person I was able to get a erection to before was my teacher this is different I can sense me and her are alike we have so much in common it scares me. I feel her hands start to wonder over my body god I try to stop her to make her stop before she reaches my erection and notices my shamefulness god stop I don't want your hands to go there don't want to know how my body will react don't want to deal with the shame but I know that I can not stop her my throat feels dry I don't know what to do she is getting so close so very close to my erection god please help I don't want her to know how shameful I am my checks are burning with embracement flushes of crimson stain my face I can feel her growing closer to her my erection it is only a matter of time before she comes to it and awakens in utter disgust at my vulgar ness my betrayal of my love I feel her hands sliding down my six pack so close please stop please be content to touch my six pack to touch my abs don't go any further down oh god please stop she is so close now just inches away centimeters oh my god she is right above it I an feel my heart speeding up and I didn't notices it to know but I can feel the quickening of her voice ragged husky strained like she is having a hard time breathing I just notice I was holding my breath I exhale but quickly regret it as her hand slides over my member I can not allow this to happen I jump up and quickly fling myself up and out of the door and what I see next illicit both horror and fear as I stare back at the town that treated me so wrong