The Rousing Misadventures of Miss Pandora Sparkle

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“I suppose that’s all we need for now.” Officer Theodore Baron was saying as he closed his little black notebook, and stood up. “We’ll need to interview Honey later, but I expect that wont take long.”

Standing over by the bar his twin, Officer Fredrick Baron nodded in agreement. “Its time we got going anyway.” He said. “You two probably need to talk.”

Both twins gave Candace cautionary looks as they prepared to leave.

“We’ll be heading back to the station unless you two have any other questions.” Ted watched them both shake their heads emphatically no. “Fred and I will probably be spending the rest of the evening interrogating Mr. Rudolph Montgomery.”

Candace snickered from where she still sat on the couch. “I cant believe you were involved with someone name “Rudolph.” She said to the blonde who was huddled close by in a chair.

Strangely enough, Pandora was not in the mood to be teased at the moment. “I suppose I would have been better off dating someone named Chrysler?” She asked dryly.

The tall brunette stiffened noticeably as Pandora said her name, and she heard two identical intakes of breath from across the room.

Candace came up off of the couch like her ass was spring loaded. Pandora could only watch in amazement as the two huge, burly police officers abruptly whizzed out of her apartment with their younger sibling hot on their heels. Yelps were heard from out on the landing, then the sound of four feet very rapidly descending her stairs.

Pandora blinked twice. She would never have believed the brawny twins could have moved that quickly if she hadn’t seen it with her own eyes.

Candace had walked back, and was standing out in front of her open door still yelling threats down at her brothers.

“See you later Chrys!” One of the twins yelled back up.

“Try to behave!” The other one offered right behind it.

“Kiss my ass!” Candace screamed back at them.

“We love you!” Echoed back up at her in twin stereo.

“I love you too, you tremendous assholes!” Candace stuck her tongue out.

Laughter was the only answer she got. Pandora heard the Police cruiser doors slam, then the sounds of the brothers leaving.

Candace stomped back into her living room muttering under her breath.

Pandora sat in her chair with her chin in her hands, and a heartrending look of distress on her face.

“Do you want to be alone right now?” Candace fidgeted nervously. “Because ill understand if you do.”

She thought about it for a moment. Did she want to be alone? She decided that she didn't. Pandora shook her head no. “I-I would like for you to stay awhile if you don’t mind.”

Candace smiled at her as she took her place on the couch. “Why would I mind?”

“I’m kind of in a strange mood right now.” Pandora said staring at the floor. “Seeing and hearing all that. Seeing all those pictures he had taken of me... I just...” She sighed loudly. “I feel so violated.”

Candace nodded her understanding. “That’s only natural.”

Pandora tugged her bathrobe closer around her body. She was feeling cold for some reason. “I just feel like… like all the joy in my life has been stolen from me.” When her eyes met Candace’s again they were brimming with tears. “I know I’m being depressing. Right now I don’t feel like ill ever smile again.” A plump pink bottom lip quivered. “You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to.”

The tall brunette sat up straighter on the couch and leaned over so she could take Pandora’s hand. “I know it feels that way right now.... But trust me on this. You will smile again... and laugh... and I want to be here.”

Pandora sniffled as she felt Candace squeeze her hand in support. “Do you really think so?”

“Pffffttttt…” Candace grinned at her. “I know so.” The blonde gave her a doubtful look. “I can prove it to you.”

Pandora wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her bathrobe. “How?”

Candace looked around at the empty apartment suspiciously. “Ill tell you something, but first...” She glanced at Puffy and Fluffy. “The three of you have to take a solemn vow never to repeat what I’m about to say.”

Puffy and Fluffy meowed right on cue. Pandora hesitantly nodded yes.

“Okay then....” Candace exhaled loudly. “You remember earlier when you said my name?”

“Chrysler?” Pandora said puzzled where this might be going.

Candace nodded. “Well, you see.. I’m the youngest of four children.”

Pandora raised an eyebrow. The fact that Candace was the baby in her family didn’t surprise her one bit. She had had spoiled brat practically tattooed on her forehead from the first day they met.

“My mother adores children.” Candace continued. “My parents would have probably have had ten, but there were “complications” with me. They had to do an emergency cesarean on my mother, and the doctors told my parents that another birth might kill her.”

The blonde frowned. This was supposed to be making her laugh?

Candace swallowed loudly. “Anyway.. afterwards, when my mother was in her room, and the doctors had her doped up to the gills -she still claims that she saw blue bunnies, and pink squirrels dancing on rainbows by the way- one of the nurses came in and asked her what she wanted to name me.”

Pandora was now even more confused. “And she named you Chrysler... That’s not so bad really... A little unusual perhaps...”

Candace nodded and chewed at her lip for a moment while staring at the floor. Finally she raised her head so that their eyes could meet. “Yes....” She said hesitantly. “She named me Chrysler Lee.”

Pandora’s forehead wrinkled up. “So?” It didn’t sound that bad to her.

A loud sigh from Candace. “Just think about it for a second Pandora.” She said wearily.

She did think about it. Suddenly, Pandora’s eyes went wide and her hands flew up to cover her mouth as she gasped. “Oh no!”

“Oh yes!” Candace looked truly miserable. “In a drug induced stupor my darling mother quite merrily christened me, “Chrysler Lee Baron.”

Pandora burst out laughing hysterically, and she didn’t stop until she seriously thought she just might puke again.