Touru to Shidou/Touru and Shidou

~*~*~*~Touru

I woke about four and only knew this because there was a clock on Shidou’s side of the bed. I was still lying on top of him. I remembered him coming to bed, asking if I’d prefer him or Thalia. I could guess what’d brought on that question. Alana had been telling stories. I lay there a while, just enjoying how Shidou felt under me. He’d taken off his shirt even though he’d left me dressed when he put me to bed. I kissed his chest and he moaned as I slid out of bed. He rolled over, looking for me on the bed and I handed him my pillow. He made a face, but curled around it anyways. I watched him for a moment because he was cute before I went into the kitchen, grabbing my backpack on the way out.

I was at the table when Alana woke up and started making her tea. “Mornin’,” I mumbled at her, still not quite awake enough to talk. “Tellin’ stories on me?”

She laughed. She woke up pretty easily, “Not many.”

“You forgot to tell him that Thalia started kicking me out of the bed,” I groused.

“She did?” Shidou asked.

“Yeah,” I groused, still not ready to talk.

“When she started to develop, Touru sleeping on her chest was uncomfortable. And then, he didn’t like the lumps. He’s preferred guys since before they were old enough to know about the birds and the bees.”

Shidou kissed me on the top of my head, “Well, I won’t be developing lumps and it doesn’t hurt me. You can sleep on me as long as you want.”

I looked up at him and managed to smile, “Good.”

He kissed me and Alana cleared her throat. Shidou took his time breaking our kiss though my face was hot. He grinned at me and turned to her, “I had to kiss him good morning.”

“Can you at least wait until I’ve had my tea and leave?”

“Leave?” I asked.

“My friend is in town.”

“Oh, okay,” I replied, turning back to my writing. Her friend had been her friend as long as I’d known her. I didn’t know anything more other than it was a person who was in town probably two or three times a year, but she always cleared her schedule, giving her TA’s her classes, canceling appointments and such, to visit with her friend.

I looked up when she set her key on the table, “You boys be sure to lock the door when you leave. Take care, have fun. I’ll see you tomorrow night.” With that, she was gone, picking up an overnight bag as she went.

I returned to my writing and Shidou sat at the table a moment, trying to figure things out. After a moment, I looked up at him, “Don’t worry about it. She’ll come back very happy.”

“What’s her friend like?”

“Dunno. I don’t even know if it’s a guy or a girl.”

“That’s weird.”

“A little, but she’s happy. That’s what matters, right?”

“Yeah.” He leaned over and kissed my cheek. I turned so that he could kiss my mouth and he obliged me. I slid over so I was on his lap, straddling him in the chair, my arms around him. He pulled back a little, “How ya feeling?”

“Should write a little more, but I wanted to thank you for taking care of me.”

“I can wait,” he whispered.

“I can’t.” I kissed him hungrily. I was hungry for him. He held my hips, letting me do what I wanted to him. I left his mouth, my hands pulling his shirt up as I searched for places on his neck to make him moan. He started to pull my shirt up and I swatted his hands away. “If you don’t stop, I’m going to make you stop,” I growled at him. A shudder rippled through his body and he stilled. I pulled away from his neck to look at him. His eyes were dark and he looked at me like he was waiting for something. “Shidou?” I said softly.

“I’m yours,” he replied softly, a little bit of a smile on his lips. I kissed him again and began my journey again. He held onto the legs of the chair while I licked and nibbled on his neck. When I nibbled near his pulse, he moaned louder and tipped his head, opening his throat to me. I nibbled a little harder and he groaned more. I kept biting just a little harder and he gasped and then moaned my name.

I slipped my hand down his body, pulling his shirt over his head, using my knees to keep his arms down, though. When I had the shirt over the back of the chair, holding his arms, I pulled back, “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” he moaned, his head lolling back.

I held his cheek, making him look at me. “If you don’t like what I’m doing, say ‘banana,’ understand?”

His eyes sobered, “I will. You do the same.” I nodded and kissed him hard, biting his lip. He moaned and tried to roll his hips into mine. I slid my hands down between my legs and his body and pinned his hips to the chair while I kissed his neck again, exploring the other side this time. He rolled his head so I could reach whatever I felt like tasting.

I pulled away just enough to look down his body. His chest glistened with sweat, his nipples standing out, hard, waiting for me to taste them. The sweats he was wearing were starting to show a bit of wetness at the tip of his erection. I licked my lips, imagining the feel of his erection in my mouth. I then looked up and licked up his throat before suckling on his Adam’s apple. I felt and heard him moan loudly when I did that. My hands left his hips and began caressing his chest and abdomen, pinching every so often as I kissed and nipped along his shoulders and collar bones. He panted and moaned and kept his hips still for me. Very slowly, I slid off his lap, moving to kneel between his knees. My lips trailed down the center of his chest. I could see him trembling and it felt good to know I was doing that to him, that I was making him quiver from need. I nibbled my way across his chest to one of those begging nipples and took it between my teeth. He curled over my head, nearly screaming my name. I pushed him back while I kept nibbling on his chest. My hands were on his shoulders, holding him back as I bit my way across to his other nipple and he tried to react again when I bit that one, too. After a moment, his body relaxed back and he panted, but stopped trying to curl forward. I used my hands to pull down his sweats, pinching his hips when he didn’t lift them for me. I pulled them down past his knees, but didn’t let him take them off as I nibbled down his abdomen.

My mouth was just over his shaft and I wanted so much to suck on him. I reached in my backpack and pulled out a couple of condoms and the lube, though. I wanted to feel him inside me, too. I licked his shaft and held down his hips when he tried to follow the movement. I then prepared his condom, sliding it on him. He managed to look at me, his eyes dazed, “Here?”

“Yeah. She won’t come back. Now, be quiet.” I put the lube and the second condom on the table in easy reach and began taking off my own clothes slowly, trying to make it like a strip tease, though I felt a little silly about it until I looked in his eyes again. He was enjoying the show a lot and that made it easier. I put on my own condom, stroking myself a little, watching his face as he watched my hand. While he watched, I lubed his shaft and he moaned, his eyes drifting closed as I rubbed him. Very carefully, I moved so I was over his lap again, rubbing my shaft against his chest, pulling his head back and kissing him hard. I moved down slowly, dragging my shaft down his body while I held the condom with one hand, the other pulling his hair so he’d follow me. When I felt his shaft under me, I moved my hand to guide him into me. It was a little awkward, but I managed to slide up and down, using my toes and legs as leverage. I started a little slower than I wanted, just to make sure I could do it and then I began riding him hard. The chair scraped a few times on the floor, but we found a rhythm together, him rocking into me and me slamming myself down onto him. I bit his lips, his neck, wherever I could reach and he screamed for me, begging me to bite him harder, ride him harder, just go harder. He slammed up into me, screaming my name and I felt him come. It was like a shock up my spine and I felt myself come, holding onto his shoulders while my head went back and his name left my lips loudly enough to be heard three states over, I’m sure.

I felt him pull me to his chest and was too tired to ask how his arms were free. When I felt his shirt still on his shoulders, though, I didn’t need to. I just rested on his chest and he held me, rubbing my back gently.

~*~*~*~Shidou

I couldn’t believe what he’d just done to me. He was amazing. Though, it was weird being in Alana’s kitchen and everything, but it felt so good. “I’ll have to have you thank me for stuff more often,” I whispered and my voice sounded harsh to my own ears.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” he whispered, his voice haggard. “If you want, though, next time, you can tie me up.”

“I think we’ll try it in something other than a chair next time, too.”

He pulled away from my neck and looked at me, his green eyes very content. His finger traced my neck and I shivered, “You’ve got a lot of marks.”

“One day, I promise to return the favor.” He sighed and leaned against me again. “How you feeling, Love?”

He yawned, “I’m awake, I just need to write a little more and a shower wouldn’t be out of place. Food might be an idea, too.”

I hugged him, “Shower, you write, I’ll fix food, and then we’ll eat, okay?” He nodded and I then asked, “Why ‘banana’?”

“Cause if we keep playing that way, there’ll be times when ‘no’ is just part of the game, like if you tickle me while we’re playing. I looked it up.”

“You sure do find a lot of interesting ideas online.”

He pulled away from me and grinned, “That’s what we’re doing Friday through Sunday morning, playing on line and trying new things.”

“Are you saying you don’t like it when I just…” before I could finish, he kissed me deeply, almost enough to reawaken my shaft. It didn’t help that I was still in him and he was rocking a little as he kissed me.

“I’m not saying anything other than there are a lot of things we can try and I love it when you make love to me, no matter how we make love. I love making love to you. It doesn’t matter, we could do the same thing all the time and I’d enjoy it because it was you, but I like to play, too. Don’t you?” He tightened his muscles around me.

I groaned, “Bastard, are you trying to get me hard again?”

He slid his hands down my chest, his face going still, “No, not right now. I want to see my parents and Thalia and tell them our good news.” I followed his gaze down and he was looking at his ring.

I caressed his cheek and when he looked up at me again, I said, “Well, let’s go get a shower, then.” His eyes seemed to glow softly when he looked at me. “You’re so wonderful,” I whispered.

He leaned forward and kissed me softly before sliding up and out of my lap. “You are, too, my lover.”

He waited for me to stand and then helped me get my shirt all the way off. He led me to the bathroom and very tenderly washed me. I returned the favor, kissing him all over to make sure the soap was gone. I ended up on my knees in front of him, his shaft right in front of my mouth. “May I?” I asked softly, my hands caressing his hips.

He looked at me, “Please.” I held his eyes while I slowly swallowed him down. I swallowed around him and he groaned, his eyes fluttering shut. With one hand, I fondled his balls, pressing behind them every so often, drawing more groans out of him. My other hand went to my shaft and stroked in time to what I was doing on him. His hands tangled in my hair and he began rocking into my face. I relaxed my throat as much as I could and it took a couple of strokes, but I figured out how to breathe around his thrusts and when I got that down, I stopped gagging, too. As he continued to thrust harder, I figured out how to suck and use my tongue. His noises got louder and I felt myself getting closer to that place. He thrust hard into me and I felt him come, tasted it on the back of my tongue. I swallowed around him and came myself, groaning around his shaft.

His knees went out on him and I tried to catch him, tried to guide him to the floor, but he kinda fell in a heap. He did lean forward and rest on my shoulder, panting. I kissed his forehead and could taste sweat as well as water on his skin. “Why am I still horny?” he asked softly.

“Because you love me and we have time to be?” I suggested.

I felt him shrug as he nuzzled into my neck, “Alana would say it’s because we’re eighteen year old boys and have no choice in the matter. I hear her say that about all her classes.” His voice changed so that he sounded a little like her, “I have yet to see an eighteen year old boy who wasn’t horny at least eighty percent of the time. The rest of the time, they’re either eating or asleep, which is no guarantee that they’re not horny anyways.” He laughed and then sat up to look at me. “I wonder if she arranged with her friend to give us time alone?”

“Who knows?” I replied. I rubbed his cheek, absently noting he needed to shave, “Are you good for now, though?”

He nodded, “Yeah. I’m getting hungry.” He laughed again. We helped each other up and turned off the water. We dried off quickly and while I got dressed, he shaved and started writing while I wandered around the kitchen finding food to cook.

After we ate, I wandered into the bathroom to comb my hair and he put away his notebook. My neck was literally covered in bite marks, a couple of them looking like he almost broke the skin. He stood in the doorway, blushing, “I kinda got carried away.”

“I like it, though, so don’t say you’re sorry.”

He grinned a little, “You ready to go?”

“Yeah,” I said, switching off the light and reaching for his hand. He laced his fingers with mine and I looked over at him. He was wearing a red button up shirt that looked really good on him. “You should wear red more often,” I commented.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he replied almost dryly.

I stopped and pulled him to where I could see him. His pants weren’t pants, though. He smirked and I pulled at it. He was wearing a skirt. It only went to his knees and it was made of black jean material. I made him turn around and when he faced me again, I grinned. “I like it a lot.”

He smiled then, “Alana told me she’d saved some of my clothes and a few other things for me from my parents’ house before the courts sent me to live with my…with Rachel and Andrew. I now have a couple of kilts and one more dress.”

“They still fit?” I asked. I’d out grown everything I had from when I was fifteen.

~*~*~*~Touru

I had to laugh at him, “Well, obviously, don’t you think?” I turned again for him and he pulled me to his chest before I could finish the turn.

“Tell me,” he whispered in my ear, his voice husky, “do you wear it traditionally?”

I groaned, “Parents first and then you can find out.” He nibbled on my ear and I moaned, “Shidou, really, parents first.”

I felt him take a deep breath and then he slowly let me go. I turned and before he could say anything, I kissed him. “You won’t let me apologize, I don’t want you to, either. Not about that.”

He grinned a little, “Okay, not sorry.” He took my hand and we left.

I looked around while he drove, remembering a bunch of places I used to go, eating places, mostly. There were a few that had changed, and a lot that hadn’t, making the ones that changed more obvious. “Would you be upset if I wanted to show you around a bit before we went back to Alana’s?” I asked, looking over at him.

He grinned at me, “No, I can see you’re excited. Hormones will wait, I’m sure.”

I laughed at his answer and started pointing out things to him. He laughed but started asking questions, too, so I didn’t mind. I told him about the store that had the best ice cream shakes, and the place to get the best cheeseburgers. And there was the old movie theatre. It had been built years and years ago. It had a stage under the screen and an old player piano. Once a month, they’d play old silent films and the player piano would be tickled by ghostly fingers as the images on the screen acted out their larger than life dramas. Tonight was that night, even. “Can we go?” I asked after telling him about it.

He laughed at me, I think mostly because I was bouncing in the seat when I asked. “Yes, we’ll go. Calm down.” He kept laughing and reached for my hand. He squeezed my fingers a little and then let go to drive. “I like seeing you so happy.”

I grinned at him. Just then, we turned into the parking lot of the grave yard. I kinda expected to feel depressed again, but I didn’t. I was still happy. We got out and went to the shrine to pick up things before heading to my family’s graves. When we got there, though, there was incense still burning. Someone had just been here. I looked around, but I didn’t see anyone. I knelt and felt Shidou kneel beside me and we both said the prayers for the dead. “Well,” I began, “I’m not sure who was here, but I have an idea. I’m glad your graves haven’t been neglected, though.” I took Shidou’s hand and smiled at the markers, “Mom, Papa, Thalia, Shidou asked me to marry him. We’re going to have the ceremony before school starts and then do the legal paper work and stuff when we’re finished with school. I’m so happy. I wish you could be here. We’re going to get married on that overlook we used to visit a lot. It’s so pretty.” I leaned on his shoulder and he wrapped an arm around me.

“I guess I could call you Mom and Papa, now, too,” Shidou said as he held me. “I promised you I’d take care of him. I can’t imagine my life without Touru with me. I hope you approve of me. I will do my best to be a good support and a good husband to him.”

I wrapped my arm around his waist, “And I’ll do my best to be a good husband, too.”

We sat there a while longer, just holding each other and watching the incense burn down. A butterfly lit on their graves, first on Papa’s then Mom’s then Thalia’s. It was a purple and grey butterfly. I felt Shidou’s head move to watch it as it cleaned its face on Thalia’s marker. “I think they approve,” he whispered, his voice awed.

“Me, too,” I replied, in about the same tone. The butterfly seemed to look at us a moment before flying away. “Thank you,” I whispered softly, hearing Shidou say the same thing.

~*~*~*~Shidou

We watched the butterfly fly away, even long after we couldn’t see it anymore. We then returned the supplies to the shrine and left the cemetery. “Where did you want to go, Love?” I asked softly.

With kind of a shudder, he seemed to return to himself and said, “We can park over there and walk around a bit. We’ve got a couple of hours before the movie starts.”

We parked in a garage and wandered down the main strip, looking at window displays and other pedestrians out on a Monday afternoon. He held my hand while we were walking. He did insist we go into a jewelry store so he would know what size ring to get me for when we got married. It was kinda fun to try on different rings, but he wouldn’t tell me which ones he liked, only kept me trying on different ones. He smiled at the clerk and thanked her, saying he’d be back without me before pulling me out of the door. “Hey,” I protested.

“We’re going to miss the movie if we don’t hurry.” He laughed and tugged on my hand and refused to say anything else until we got to the theatre.

I insisted on paying and he smiled, letting me, but when we got inside, he wandered off and came back with a soda and popcorn. “Brat,” I muttered and he laughed.

“I thought we could share,” he said before I could grouse at him about only getting one.

I wrapped my arm around his waist and we went into the theatre. It was amazing. There was a stage big enough to hold a play on under the screen with an upright piano that looked really old off to one side. The seats were all big and plush, looking nearly blackish red in the dim light. He led me to one of the back rows and the seats here were nearly as big as loveseats. He gestured me to sit and then he sat, his legs draped over mine. Before I could say anything, he whispered, “I’ve always wanted to see a movie like this.”

I looked over at him and slid my hand up his thigh, very glad he’d worn a kilt. I stopped at mid thigh and whispered, “Like this?”

He nuzzled into my neck, “At least wait for the lights to go down.”

There were a few other people joining us in the theatre, but it was an early show, so not all the chairs were full, but with as high as the seatbacks were, it was hard to tell there was anyone else in the theatre. No one else sat in our row. An older man, slightly bent with age and with very white hair did something with the piano and then bobbed at the audience. The lights went down and the projector flickered to life. Tinny piano music filled the theatre as jerky images lit the screen. The movie was somewhere between bad and brilliant. It was a very old Dracula movie, with no talking and cards that came up with words on them. I watched, fascinated, while my hand wandered up and down his leg, my strokes getting longer until I was caressing him from knee to hip joint. At the top of my stroke, I let my fingers wander, smiling at what I found. “Traditional, eh?” He just moaned a little in response and I caressed his shaft. It was almost completely hard when I started touching him. He started kissing my neck and I whispered, “Do you want me to finish you in here?”

I felt him squirm a little and then felt paper napkins next to the hand on his shaft. “Please, if you want to,” he moaned softly.

I brought his lips to mine with my free hand, mumbling “Clean freak.” He only moaned in response, my tongue in his mouth, keeping him from talking. He was making so much noise, though, that I was worried about people turning around and staring at us. Granted, part of that was just probably me being overly paranoid because I was going to jack my boyfriend…my fiancé…off in a public place, but still. I wrapped my free hand around his throat and squeezed just a little bit, my eyes open, trying to see his face without breaking our kiss. He stilled, his eyes going wide and then he seemed to melt into me. I kept my hand around his throat, kinda squeezing a little, enough to feel his pulse on both sides of his neck, but not any harder. He remained silent as long as I held him. When I tried to release his neck, he’d begin to whimper. His hips started to rock into my hand and it wasn’t long before I felt him come, some of it dripping down onto my fingers. I pulled my hand out and licked my fingers clean before going back in to retrieve the napkin, wiping him clean as I did. He leaned on my shoulder, radiating contentment. I think he would have been purring if he could have. I wadded the paper and shoved it in my pocket, trying to unobtrusively adjust my jeans.

“I’ll take care of that when we get back to Alana’s,” he purred in my ear. He could purr, and gods, it made me want to slam into his body hard and repeatedly.

“And here, I thought being at Alana’s would put a damper on things,” I teased softly, watching as the movie Dracula contorted in pain as the sun began to rise.

He shrugged, “Oh, well, then.” He sighed and we sat silently until the end of the credits. The house lights came up and the old man came out and fiddled with the piano again. He slowly slid his legs off my lap, “Are you in a condition to walk?”

I looked down and my body had calmed down again, “Yeah.”

“Do you wanna go back or have dinner?” A startled look crossed his face, “Schele…”

“I called her. We’re having dinner Thursday night.” He looked at me questioningly a moment, “She was working while you had your driving lesson. I called the diner and talked to her. She was glad to hear we’re still together. Your old boss was too.”

“Oh, okay.” He grinned and held a hand out for me. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah, a bit.” I looked at the popcorn bucket. We’d hardly touched it.

He took it from me and handed it to a couple of kids just coming in, “Here ya go. Enjoy the movie.” They gave him an odd look but then he said, “Hey, you’re Jack’s younger brother, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” one of them said suspiciously.

He grinned, “Tell him Touru said hi.”

The kid’s eyes went wide, “That Touru?” Touru nodded. “Like the one with a twin and everything?” the kid’s voice was awed.

“Yeah, that one. Touru Marcus. There was only one of me,” his eyes were starting to get a little tense around the edges though he was still smiling.

The kid’s friend elbowed him and he jumped like he’d been bitten, “Oh, man. Sorry. Thanks.” He walked down the aisle and his friend smacked the back of his head as they were walking away.

I wrapped my arm around him and guided him out of the theatre. He was still smiling, but the tension around his eyes looked bad. “Touru?”

“I forgot that I was part of a pair here. Every one knew me as one of the Marcus twins.” I held him, pulling him to my chest and he let his face go to my shoulder. I rubbed his back and he whispered, “I’m not going to cry.” He didn’t sound too sure about that, though.

“We can go back to Alana’s, if you want,” I said softly.

He nodded, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize for this, Love. I can fix us something to eat there.”

He shook his head, “Hold me for a while first.” I continued to hold him, not paying attention to the people around us. After a long time, he gave a shuddering sigh and straightened up. His eyes were bright and looked like he’d cry given half a chance, but he managed a watery smile, “I’m ready to go.”

I didn’t say anything, just took his hand and we walked to the car. I opened the door for him and he hugged me again tightly, burying his face in my neck. I felt a little moisture from his eyes and I held him. I felt him sobbing silently and I held him tightly, just letting him cry. I rubbed his back and held him. I didn’t have any words for him to make it all better, so holding him was all I could do. After a while, he stopped. He never made noise, just sobbed against me, silently. That was almost more disturbing than if he’d wailed. He leaned against the car, “I’d forgotten that here, everyone knew me as part of a pair, part of the Marcus twins. All our friends were mutual friends, both our friends.” He sighed, looking down at the ground. “I don’t know why it’s okay for me to remember with you. With you, talking about her doesn’t hurt much. But, when he asked if I was ‘that Touru,’ it hurt, I wanted to hurt him, too.” This last was said in a whisper. I didn’t know what to say, so I rubbed his arms. He sighed and leaned forward so his head was on my chest, and I rubbed his back, “I’m sorry, but I don’t know if I can show you around any more if we’re going to run into people I knew.”

I pulled him up and to me, “You don’t have to, Love. If it hurts, you don’t have to.”

His arms went around my neck, “Why are you so nice to me? What did I do to deserve you?” He was crying again.

“I wonder the same thing, Love,” I replied, squeezing him. His sobs got louder, though. “Touru, let’s get to Alana’s,” I said softly, hoping he understood that I wanted to hold him closer, to try and ease his pain away.

~*~*~*~Touru

He was ashamed of me. I knew it would happen. I pushed away, “No. You go. I’m fine. Just leave me alone, then.” I ran from him. I think I heard him yelling after me, but I ran. He didn’t love me. He was ashamed of me. He hated…

There were lights. I stopped to look at them. There was a loud noise and the lights were getting closer. Everything slowed. I could see the car, I could see the driver, everything, but I couldn’t move.

The next thing I knew, I was on the ground, Shidou on top of me, crying loudly, calling for me. There were a lot of horns and a lot of people yelling. “What happened to the car?” I asked, pushing to sit up.

Shidou let me sit up, “You bastard, if you ever do anything like that again…” his voice choked and he buried his face in my neck. He held me tightly. He was shaking. Maybe I was, too. I looked around, and the car was past us, almost two car lengths past us. The driver was coming toward us, looking pale.

“What happened to the car?” I asked again. I was feeling numb, but things were flashing in my brain. The car honking at me, Shidou screaming for me to move, him suddenly tackling me to the median. “Why’d you hit me?” I asked.

He pulled away from my neck, his eyes wide, his face almost as white as his eyes around the hazel. His lips were almost white, “Why did I hit you? If I didn’t, the car would have. I couldn’t bear to be without you, Touru.” He choked on a sob, “Don’t you understand I need you?” Tears were flowing down his cheeks, “Why did you run from me, Touru?”

“You were ashamed of me. You wanted to hide.” My voice was harsh, bitter in my own ears.

“No, I wanted to be able to hold you closer, you idiot. I wanted to sit with you in my lap and hold you until you felt better again. I am not ashamed of you, not ever.”

I pushed at him, “Don’t call me an idiot, bastard.” Then something clicked in my brain, “The car was going to hit me…” I started shaking and I felt Shidou trying to pull me into his lap, “The car…was going….and you…” Something snapped in my head and I started sobbing.

He held me tighter and I clung to him. “Don’t leave me,” I heard him whisper. “If you died, I don’t think I could go on. Part of me would die, a big part.” That made me cry harder.

I couldn’t breathe, I was crying too hard. There were people asking questions, and neither of us could say anything. He slid down my body, his arms wrapped around my waist, his face buried in my lap as he cried, begging me not to leave him. I collapsed over him, just crying. I couldn’t say anything. I couldn’t breathe.

There were people trying to take him away from me. “NO!” I screamed, clutching at him. I felt his arms tighten around me. People were talking, but they wanted me to let him go. I wouldn’t.

Alana was there, whispering at me, “It’s okay, Touru. We’re going to take you home. We’re not going to take him away from you. It’s okay.” She rubbed my back in small circles. “Breathe, Touru, just breathe. You know how to do that. Remember when we’d practice our breathing. Slowly in, slowly out. You can do it. Show me, Touru.” I remembered sitting under one of her trees, practicing breathing, learning meditation. I took a slow breath in, but it hurt. I couldn’t get much in, but I blew it out slowly. “Good boy. Again.” I took another breath and managed to get more in. I could feel myself starting to calm down. I blew it out slowly, taking another breath without her prompting me. She kept rubbing my back. After a few breaths, she asked softly, “Can you sit up? Take your time, move slowly.” I did what she told me, breathing slowly. She kept rubbing my back. I leaned against her and she whispered, “Good boy.”

Shidou was sitting up, too. I looked at him and a small figure was bent over, whispering in his ear. I couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman, not from their figure or how they were dressed, but they had a very calming aura. I could feel them. It was like when Alana was teaching us about meditation and stuff. Thalia got it better than I did and there were times she felt like that, that just being near her would be calming. “Your friend?” I asked, surprised I managed to say anything.

“Among other things, yes,” she replied, sounding very content. I looked at the person again and I couldn’t even guess at their age. Shidou was leaning against their shoulder, looking about as drawn out as I felt. I reached a hand out for him and he took my hand. We didn’t say anything, but we knew that we had much to say. I knew it and I could see it in his eyes.

I managed to look around and there was a crowd that was beginning to clear up. The car wasn’t in the road anymore. The driver was hovering, though, waiting. When I looked at him, he asked, “Are you okay?”

I looked at Shidou a moment before turning back to the guy, “We will be. I’m sorry to have caused you such trouble tonight.”

He sounded peevish, but I couldn’t really blame him, “Next time you have a lover’s quarrel, do it somewhere without traffic.” He stomped off.

I turned to Alana, “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” she asked softly, sounding a little amused.

“It was my fault,” I started.

“No,” Shidou said. “It takes two to have a fight.”

“We weren’t fighting. You wanted to take me home and I totally misunderstood you.”

“It still took both of us. I didn’t express myself clearly.”

“Enough of the blame game,” Alana’s friend said. I couldn’t even tell by their voice if they were male or female. If I were less drained, I might be frustrated or amused. “You two have much to learn, still. You are young. Is there permanent damage?”

I looked at Shidou and he looked back at me. We both shook our heads, “No, not permanent, but we need to talk.”

Alana laughed a little, “You’ve always been wise for your age, Touru. Now, we shall take you home. I will drive you two in my car and my friend will take your car, Shidou. No arguing,” she said when Shidou started to say something. “You two will then sleep. No talking or anything else until morning, even if I have to stand in the room until you are asleep.”

I leaned on her shoulder, “I’m too tired to talk.”

“Let’s get you where you should be, then,” her friend said. We managed to stand. Alana’s friend was too short to help Shidou to the car and leaned him on me. Alana pushed me away, forcing us to help each other to the car, even though both of us were barely standing. She walked ahead of us, and we followed, stumbling a bit, but managed to make it to her car. Getting in, we both needed her help, but we held each other as she drove. There was desperation in Shidou’s face. It hurt to see it there. I kissed his cheek and wrapped my arm around his neck. He held me to his chest tightly.

When we got to Alana’s we barely made it to the room, our legs not wanting to help us. “Get ready for bed, my boys. Sleep as you normally would. Touru, put your notebook next to the bed. You two are not allowed out of bed until after you’ve talked.” She turned to face the wall, giving us a modicum of privacy while we stripped. We’d gotten into a habit of sleeping without clothing. When we got into bed, Shidou lay on his back and I crawled on his chest, my leg going over his. He held me tightly. When we stopped moving, Alana came over and tucked the covers around us. “My boys, you’ve had a rough day. Sleep. Rest in the knowledge that you have love. Though it is not enough to make everything work, it is a good start. You have tools. Tonight, though, is not the time to use them.” She put a hand on each of our heads, “Sleep now, my boys. I’ll see you Wednesday morning.” I don’t remember hearing her leave the room. I remember Shidou holding me tightly, though.