Closer

Thanks so much Rose, Denise and Gypsi. Sorry for the wait, but this chapter kind of terrified me. I was so frightened of it, I had a friggin’ two month writer’s block. It’s over now- I can see quite clearly.

Thanks you guys for waiting ever so patiently. This fic is about two chapters shy of being finished. This was the hardest part of the story I had to write. All this time of thinking about different things that could have happened to the two of them, this was my final decision. I kept it a secret from myself as well as you guys. I just want you all to know that Sean as well as Rosalyn are by no means perfect—they’re human, they’re in love, but they are gonna be in some serious hurt right now. So please, be prepared. It had to end in order to start again, so here it is—the breakup chapter. Hope you like, in a saddened sort of way…

Winter Part One


Sean couldn’t have been happier. All of those other years of pain seemed to fade away. Rosalyn did that to him. She made him feel… beyond happiness; beyond joy. To be in a constant state of euphoria was a most wonderful feeling. She was his endless supply of endorphins. Nothing in the world could bother him. Not work, tests, minor tiff with the people around him… Rosalyn had him flying high where nothing could touch him, and nothing could bring him down.

It had been nearly six months since the day they met (for a second time) at the store. Six months of true bliss. And it had been well over a decade since he had seen his father. That is, until that day. It had been six months of soaring high, and now Sean felt himself crashing down to Earth and beyond to the pits of hell. He had just gotten home from school, and was on his way back out to the library to meet Rosalyn. They always met up there after school. After about five minutes of walking through the cold snow, the seemingly untouchable Sean was stabbed in his proverbial Achille’s heel. He was accosted by a man. A stranger. A monster. His father.

“How ya doin, sonny boy.” Sean felt sick to the pits of his stomach. He felt his heart race uncontrollably in a horrific sort of way. He wanted to hit him; he wanted to run. But somehow, he couldn’t move at all. Instead, he stood stock still, involuntarily taking him in.

Eric Fields. He more or less looked the same, except he didn’t seem so tall and large now. He looked older, a bit worse for wear. Tired perhaps. He stank of vodka and cigarette smoke, but he didn’t appear to be drunk at the moment. He had no signs of gray- the same golden locks that Sean himself possessed. The same the sky blue eyes, though his seemed to be a bit glassy. Never before in Sean’s life had he felt the intense need to dye his hair blacker than pitch darkness, get a nose job and wear contacts. He hated with a passion that he resembled this man. He looked like a youthful version of his father.

Even though it was winter outside, the pure, fresh snow surrounding them, Sean felt a coldness creep beyond his skin and into the marrow of his bones. He felt frozen and unclean.

“What’s the matter, son? Can’t talk to your good ol’ dad?”

“How… how did you find me?” Sean forced out, fearing he might now know where his mother was.

“Coincidence, really. I’ve got a lady friend that stays round these parts. Went to that corner store over there to pick up a box of rubbers, and saw you pass by.” That tightening ball in Sean’s chest didn’t seem to be going away anytime soon. He just wanted it over with so he could leave. Well, at least he doesn’t seem to know where mom is he thought with relief.

“What do you want?” Sean asked stiffly.

“It’s just uh… I haven’t seen or heard from you in all these years. Didn’t know where you were. I couldn’t send a card for birthdays and such. You understand? Wanted to see if that bitch raised you to be a real man.”

“Don’t you ever call my mother out of her name again.” Sean said, unknowingly clenching his fists.

“Funny how you knew exactly who I was talking about. Maybe you agree.” He said with a grin.

“You smug bastard. Get away from me.” Sean said before he started to walk away. That’s all he had to do- walk away.

“But sonny, you haven’t told me bout your lil’ girlfriend yet. She a good lay?” That stopped Sean in his tracks. He turned slowly to face the old man.

“What do you know?” He asked, walking closer. If he lays a hand on her, I’ll…

“Nuthin, ‘cept I saw you and the little black bitch. Yea, I followed you a bit to see what you were up to. Made me a lil late for my date with Natalie, but she understands. Gotta keep women on a short leash, you know? Make sure they stay in line. Don’t let them tell you what to do.” He said, his eyes darkening. “Is she your bitch, or is she making you the cunt?”

“You son of a bitch.” Sean replied in a threatening tone.

“Actually, your grandmother was a wonderful lady. If anyone out here is a son of a bitch, it’s you. Your mother was—” Before he could finish, Sean pulled back his fist quickly and stepped into the punch against his father’s face with a roar of anger. The blow sent him reeling harshly against the snowy pavement. His father looked at him with narrowed eyes.

“That all you got, pussy? Didn’t even feel it.” Sean tackled him then, raining down blows on his face and the sides of his torso. He hit him for all the years he hit his mother, for all the pain he caused, for everything he was feeling in that moment. Sean just let himself go. His father’s pain filled laughter made him stop.

“Knew you had it in you, son. Just like your old man. Had to be sure you were a man.” He wheezed through bloodied lips. Sean looked at his bruised face, his slightly closed left eye, the funny way he was breathing. He was disgusted—with himself. He quickly scrambled off of him with a frightened look in his eye.

“I knew it since the first day I held you that you’d be just like your old man. It was only a matter of time.” He said as he tried to get off the ground, wincing in pain as he sat up slowly.

“I’m proud of ya, sonny boy.” He said, looking at Sean steadily. Sean couldn’t stop looking at the damage that he had done. His father was right. He was just like him— no regard for anything. He was a monster too. This just proved it. His father truly was proud of him. Sean wanted to vomit. Instead, he ran away, all the way back home. He didn’t even bother to take off his big, winter coat and boots. He headed straight to the bathroom and climbed into the empty tub, trying to find silence. But he couldn’t escape the chatter in his own head, telling him he was a monster, and how eventually he would hurt everyone that he loved. Sean cried as he thought of the next horrible thing he would have to do—break his own as well as Rosalyn’s heart.

A/N: Part two coming out in the next day or so. Maybe even tonight ;) Hope this was ok...