Rind.

Kellan had woken sometime before sunup and the heat had faded. Not gone, he knew, but faded, just enough to think and reflect and meditate. Gustin was his. He'd rolled out of bed after that thought, the emotion he felt unexpectedly strong. He moved silently, padded across the floor to check on the fires. Thought about shifting but didn't feel the urge, made himself a chew to calm his nerves and squatted by the fire instead. Kuskellanar had a mate. Kuskellanar the warrior, the silent cub, the fighter, the only son, the alpha wolfe who swore he would never love another after Ideste had gone. Kuskellanar had a mate, a little human who he had found in the forest. And now a lit, too, perhaps. Kellan suspected that was why the heat had faded - Gustin needed time to adjust, for his body to heal itself and hold tight to what lay within. Everything was moving so fast that it worried him; he didn't remember hearing of the Change being so quick. Days, they said it took, but he'd seen Gustin and touched him and been inside of him and he was whole. Maybe the rumors were right. Maybe his human was something special. They would need a home, it occurred to him suddenly. He couldn't keep a lit a place like this, with no space or green plants or enough food to eat. He had no pack. The insanity of what he'd done struck him; he had no pack, little territory; no way to provide for the human mate he'd taken, or the lit he'd likely sired. Kellan remembered once, when he was a cub not yet nine, and his father had shifted and taken him to the high cliffs near their home. Kellan, he'd called to ignorant ears, come away from the edge. But Kuskellanar had been a stubborn cub to raise, fearless and not ever ready to step back or down. He wanted to see the view. The soil was rocky, but little grey paws made their way, nimbly, over it until the view of the earth below was just beginning to appear and then somehow, it warped, went all sideways and wrong, and before he could understand what was happening, his father had his throat grasped tight in his teeth, belly to the ground, laying so close to the edge with small grey Kellan dangling from his jaws. He'd set him down on safe ground, shifted both of them back. Kellan knew he was in trouble; if this had been his mother, she would have beaten him senseless and cried for hours. But his father just said to him, slowly, and without anger or malice, "Kuskellanar, you are my cub and I am your father. Your life is in my hands."

Kellan spit into the fire. He should take his family home. His father would care for Gustin, he suspected; the human could be charming, in his own mischievous way, and the two of them talked about the same amount. His parents would help him; he needed the help. He had no idea how to raise a litter. He glanced once more at the bed. Gustin was sleeping. Kellan thought again about his home, twice in one hour, more than he ever had since he'd come to be exiled here. His family probably missed him; they had no way of knowing that he was not dead. His mother probably hated him for that, if she was still alive. If he could just get home, perhaps all would be forgiven. Perhaps all would be well. Ideste would be in the past, and his past would be far away.

Kellan looked over again at the bed; Gustin was waking.

Gustin blinked one eye open first, then the other. He was cold. Kellan was gone. He sat up immediately, looked around the room. Steam rose quietly from the pot over one fire and the sun was filtering brightly in through the tiny high windows, casting scattered patterns on the floor. Kellan was crouching by another fire, chewing leaves and spitting them into the pit. Gustin shook his head, sat up. Kellan turned, looked cautiously up at him. Gus swallowed dry.
"Morning." he managed. Kellan nodded, chewed slowly, then asked:
"How do you feel?"
Gustin moved to get out of bed and pain laced through his lower body. He laid back down and flailed with his right hand for the bowl of chew, almost empty. Kellan looked troubled.
"You hurt."
Gus chewed, laid quietly on his back and waited for the pain to subside before he answered.
"Is it over? Are you normal now?"
"Not over. Faded for now, few hours maybe. But not over, human."
Kellan poked idly at the fire with a long stick.
"Gustin."
Gus corrected, not even trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice. Kellan blinked at him, chewed and spit.
"Gustin." he repeated, then went back to his fire and looking troubled. Gus went back to staring quietly at the ceiling. Minutes passed, then Kellan's voice, gentle, broke the silence.
"Are you alright, Gustin?"
Gus bit his lip and lied.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"About everything?"
Gustin decided that he as definitely not prepared to have this conversation right now.
"Yes. Fine. Everything."
Kellan got up, meandered his way over to the bed and laid one hand on Gustin's thigh.
"The Change is hard on humans."
Gus flipped his legs over the side of the bed, away from Kellan's touch, dangled his feet above the floor and looked decidedly not at Kellan.
"I'm fine."
Kellan tried to think of what to say. No words were forthcoming. Gustin stood, still not meeting Kellan's eyes, and squeezed past him to tiptoe across the bare floor. Kellan put out a hand to stop him. Gustin stared at it, looked from shielded eyes up at his wolfe.
"Please, Kellan. I need to bathe."
Kellan let him go.

Under the water, he expected everything to be clear. It wasn't. The past day - days? how long had it been now? - were foggy and his own role in everything remained unclear. He recognized the sound of Kellan pacing outside of the bathing rooms but refused to acknowledge it. He felt strange; tingly, sort of, all over. Maybe it was the chew. So what the hell had happened to him? Gustin took two deep breaths and touched himself, his belly which felt hot for some reason, then his cock, which was still sensitive even with the chew and then a little farther behind that and no, he was right, it hadn't been a dream, not a hallucination, and Kellan wasn't lying. His stomach turned a little bit. He took his hand away, bit the sickness down and put his face into the water. Kellan was pacing outside. His wolfe. His mate? Were they mates now? Was that how this worked? Would Kellan expect him to stay with him? He hadn't minded staying before, when it was just for a little while, until the spring melt, and then he could make a new decision, but this...this felt permanent. This felt bad. Well, actually, it didn't. It felt weird, but not entirely bad..almost OK. Well, the changing - maybe not OK, but staying with Kellan - might be OK. The idea of the alternative felt a little bad. Gustin didn't like the thought of having to leave him. He'd actually come to like the surly beast. He needed time to think. What about the other thing? Kellan had warned him before...Gus shut his eyes against the sudden upshot of fear. Right. The other thing. The weird thing. Kellan had tried to explain to him the possibility of a pregnancy. Which would definitely be a top-shelf disturbance to his life, by any measure in the book. Gus was a runner, and kids tended to move slow. Maybe he could leave it here with Kellan? But then who would take care of it while Kellan went out to hunt? And in the winter? And when it grew older? Would it ever remember him? What if Kellan never told it his name? For no reason at all, tears began to well up at little behind Gustin's eyes. He rinsed his face and tried to focus on the problems at hand without inventing more all on his own. The whole idea seemed pretty ridiculous anyway except there was that pesky new organ that seemed to have situated itself right behind his dick, and seemed to be actively protesting his ability to forget the Change. Memories of sensation, of heat and Kellan coming hard inside of him flashed through his mind. So if he actually could carry something to term...a wolfish mate in heat, some newfound fertility, and a marathon of untempered sex. Odds did not seemed tipped in his favor. Fantastic.

Kellan was just beginning to worry when Gustin reappeared, wrapped neck to toe in a drying sheet. He jumped, looking guiltily at his mate, who was watching him pace very close to the door.
"Human! We need to talk."
"Gustin." he corrected, "And yes, we do."
Gus moved past him, made his way towards the little low table to sit and have some stew. He poured himself a serving with a makeshift ladle and glanced up at the wolfe.
"You want?"
Kellan nodded, sat down to join him. The bowl was halfway to his mouth when Gustin spoke.
"I want to know why you were exiled. What happened with your pack?"
Kellan put his ears back; his heart jumped in strange ways. But he couldn't lie to Gustin, not here, not now that he was his mate.
"Why am I exiled?" Stalling for time.
Gustin blew on his soup.
"Tell me what happened."
Kellan wrinkled his nose and scratched at his ears.
"I was exiled because I killed another."
Gustin's eyebrows dipped down a little as he congratulated himself on his good taste in potential child fathers.
"Or so my pack believes."
Gustin half-glanced up at the mention of this caveat, set his soup bowl down.
"So did you?"
Kellan looked troubled, drank his soup, then pulled the bowl back, swirling it around in for long, silent minutes.
"No."
Gustin waited for more.
"I would have killed him, if I'd had the chance. I hated him, wanted him dead. But in the end, I was not the one who did it."
Gustin's face was unreadable when he met Kellan's eyes.
"You didn't do it. So who did?"
Kellan paused. His heart punched in his throat. He knew he could not lie.
"Ideste."