Snowfall

When we were out of earshot I asked. \"Who are they, Amar?\"

\"Friends.\" He looked over at me a moment before continueing. \" Each one owes me their life, a few, several times over. They are retainers. They protect me during the day when its necessary and I protect them. Its a comfortable arrangement. Come, lets speak of better things, you\'ll have plenty of time to get to know them.\" He paused and then said. \"So is there anything you\'d like to ask? Or do you have doubts? This does not have to happen now if you\'re not ready.\"

I frowned and chewed my lip in thought. There were not many doubts, such is the way of youth. It did not truly occur to me the things I would be giving up, I was more interested in the things that I would be gaining. Mainly, an eternity with Amar. Still it would not look good to not at least have some questions, right?

\"How will I know what to do?\"

\"What to do?\" He looked puzzled and then smiled in understanding. \"Ah, it would come naturally in time, hunger teaches all creatures but We will teach you before it does, hmm? There is no need to worry. I\'ll not let you starve. \"

I was more worried about accidently killing someone but I was convinced he wouldn\'t let me do that either. He\'d explained what would harm him earlier. \"What about Holy water and crucifixes? Do they harm us?\"

\"Only if its a very large crucifix and they swing it very hard.\" He chuckled. \" No neither harm us. Much to the dismay of the Church. I think it is more a thing said to calm the masses who fear creatures in the night. They wear their crosses to protect them. It is not wise to believe in a thing but better to believe in yourself and your God. I\'ve moved a cross out of my way on several occasions. Anything else?\"

\" I don\'t know, Amar, there\'s probably a thousand other things but I just can\'t seem to know what to ask. Do you sleep?\"

He grinned at me. \"Yes, I sleep after a fashion. My mind drifts during the day. I am vaguely aware of what goes on around me but it is as if I do not have the energy to move. If we are threatened during the day with something like sunlight it will cause us to awaken enough to remove ourselves from danger. Think of it like an animal who sleeps in the winter, extreme danger will cause it to awaken but little else.\"

I nodded that made sense. \"Where do you sleep during the day to be away from sunlight?\"

\"I have a special carriage made when traveling. I will show it to you in the morning. \" He had stopped walking. We were standing in front of a lake. Its surface was as still as a mirror and the full moon seemed to have a twin rising from the dark depths to greet it.

I turned to Amar and reached out to him. \"I\'m ready.\"

His smile seemed somewhat sad but he nodded. \"Don\'t be afraid, Mon Cher. I am with you.\" He pulled me closer, one hand brushed at my curls and he seemed to be taking a moment to memorize every feature. Eventually, he bent his head and touched his lips to my neck.

The world spun away from me then. All I could feel was Amar holding me, biting me. It was far from unpleasant, instead it was like no other bliss I\'d ever known. My senses were aroused almost beyond my ability to bear. I reached my arms up to Amar pulling him closer, one hand pressing him more firmly against my neck. My mind shouted his name but the only sound that came from me was a small gasp. He was so firm against me, so real and strong. I longed to push myself against him but found I lacked the energy to move. He was so warm now, so alive, he seemed radiant to my eyes. I felt myself growing colder but it did not matter, Amar was holding me tightly, his strength comforted me and I felt nothing but trust for him.

He moved me, ever so gently. I found my head cradled against his neck. Something was wet against my lips but I was still lethargic with the bliss of being with him, consumed by him.

\"Drink, Mon Cher.\" His voice held a tone of urgency. It was enough to wake me from my dreamlike state. Drink? I licked my lips slowly, They were parched, I was thirsty. I felt as if I were slipping away now, not into Amar as I had felt before...but away into nothingness. A panic started to rise within and I became more alert, fighting the draining of my senses. Drink, he had said. I drank.

It was the sweetest thing I had ever tasted. My mouth sought the source of that blessed flow and I placed my lips around it. It seeped over my tongue slowly, each drop a nectar. I sucked gently at first caressing the neck of my love, entoxicated by this new sensation. I felt his life flow into mine, his blood held in it the things that made him unique. I could taste his love for me, his concern and finally his relief and happiness when he knew that I had begun to revive. My Amar, I held him more tightly, drinking deeply. He had been worried that he might lose me but he hid it behind his usual calm so that I did not worry. I tasted his fortitude and his vulnerability. I longed to drink more, to know more, to fully experience him.

He pulled me away with his fading strength. He\'d let me drink far more than he should but perhaps it was because he knew what I was feeling or perhaps it was the first time he\'d given himself to another like this. Shared his soul along with his blood to someone he loved. With his maker he had been unwilling and had felt pain. I watched him know, still dazed by the power of his blood in my veins and I knew he had felt the same bliss I had from his own bite.

My heart was beating wildly trying vainly to bring my body back from the brink. There was simply not enough of the right blood in my system. Amar\'s coursed through me like a fire. I could feel it scorching every part of me that it touched. I doubled over then, trying to stop the feeling by curling in on myself protectively. He came and held me, murmuring once more in that strange language I did not know and then in English.

\"It will pass soon. Don\'t fight it, that only makes it worse.\" The fire left a coldness in its wake. A stillness, I felt as if my skin were turning to stone. Surely I would become a statue soon. Lifeless, cold, unable to move. It seeped everywhere and lastly my heart, I felt it give one slow shudder before it too stopped. Too cold to continue, my marble heart.

I lifted a hand slowly afraid that I would find that I could not. It was pale in the moonlight. Like the substance I feared I had become, my skin seemed to glow. I had been pale before but that was a pale of life. This was a different hue. I looked at Amar and remembered how I thought he might be one of the Fair Folk because he looked so different. I smiled at him and he smiled faintly in return. Standing up carefully, I made my way to the lake and looked down at its surface to see my own reflection. Another creature stared back at me. He was beautiful and fierce. With golden hair in soft beguiling curls, smooth skin the color of alabaster, and blue eyes the held a fire within them. Amar came and put his hands on my shoulders, looking down at the water\'s image along with me. His eyes held that sadness for a moment before he smiled. In later years I realized he mourned the passing of my life. It is like a light to our kind, a fragile and precious thing. So easy to break and once it was gone, it was lost forever.

\"Come, Mon Cher, We have much to do but forever in which to do it. \"