Devil May Love

"Vivacious. V-i-v-a-c-i-o-u-s." The older woman in the front of the room paused, giving everyone time to write down the new vocabulary word. Gaibriel wrote it down, although he already knew it. "This word means cheerful, bubbly," his teacher continued, "Full of life." She pointed to Lindsay McMillan, the head cheerleader. "Lindsay here is vivacious. Jessica Simpson is vivacious. If not a little stupid."

She paused while a few people laughed. Gaibriel did not. He didn't get the joke. And vivacious was not the word he'd use to describe Lindsay. Promiscuous would have been a better choice.

"If you wake up in the morning and you feel like the sun is shining just for you, the wind is at your back, the world is your friend and you can't wait to greet it with a smile, you are vivacious. Any questions about the word vivacious?" She paused again.

Gaibriel doodled a little in the margins of his paper as she spelled it again for someone in the back. Two footballs for eyes... a little hook for a nose... A deep curve topped by two mini-mountains for lips... And lots of wavy hair. Long hair.

"This next word is completely opposite of vivacious. Your next word is despondent. D-e-s-p-o-n-d-e-n-t." She paused once more.

Gaibriel jotted the word down, also knowing this one. He hadn't bothered to write the definition of vivacious and he wouldn't with this one either. Instead he went back to his drawing as the teacher resumed talking.

"Despondent means sad, heavy-hearted, depressed."

Gaibriel accentuated the curve of the lips so they went up, forming a cheerful smile. This person wasn't despondent at all. But for some reason, the more he drew, the more despondent he felt.

"Let's see... My dog's litter of puppies were sold yesterday. She was the pitiful picture of despondency. She moped and whined and had the most heart-breaking eyes you'd ever want to see. Umm..."

While she was talking, Gaibriel had made the hair a little longer and brought just a bit of bangs down across his forehead. That looked better.

"Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh is despondent. If, God forbid, our star quarterback were to break his leg before tomorrow's game and we lost, we would all be despondent. Any questions?"

Gaibriel tilted his head, looking at the sketch with narrowed eyes. Even with his two-year old drawing skills, that looked familiar.

"Your next word is conspicuous. C-o-n-s-p-i-c-u-o-u-s. This word is used to describe someone or something that is eye-catching and remarkable. For example, the large diamond necklaces that stars wear to award shows are conspicuous. The Great Pyramids are conspicuous."

It was Jullien. The word and the drawing. 'Always on my mind,' he thought furiously, 'No matter what I do I can't get you out of my thoughts!' Gaibriel moved to erase the image, but stopped with his eraser hovering over the picture. He really didn't want to erase it. It looked okay... even looked a little like Jullien.

"Gaibriel, do you have a question? You look puzzled."

Gaibriel looked up, searching his brain for a response. "Well, I was just wondering... Um... " He bit his lip, telling himself to just ask the first thing that came to mind. "If, uh, you saw someone who was really beautiful and didn't look like anyone else you'd ever seen before, could you use the word conspicuous?"

His teacher smiled and nodded. "Yes, that would be a good word to use. If this person sticks out and is something to take notice of, then conspicuous is a very good word to use to describe them." She looked back to the rest of the class. "Do not be eager to use conspicuous just because something is beautiful, however. That is why I don't use people to describe conspicuous. This person must be so beautiful that they seem to pop out from everyone else. Simple attractiveness is not enough to warrant use of the word conspicuous unless you want to exaggerate a bit for writing purposes."

Gaibriel smiled to himself. In that case, that was definitely the right word for Jullien. His long honey colored hair could be spotted a mile away. Gaibriel could still see it clearly in his mind, even though now he couldn't really remember what Jullien had been wearing. And his beauty was certainly unlike anyone else. At least, any one Gaibriel had ever seen.

Something bumped his shoulder. Glancing over, the boy behind him was holding out a folded piece of paper. He pointed behind him, to Amanda. Looking back at her, Amanda smiled and nodded. Gaibriel took the paper and turned back around, holding it under his desk as he unfolded it, then bringing it quickly up to his notebook. He'd never gotten notes passed to him in class, but he'd seen other people do it. It felt odd to him. Even though he knew it wasn't true, he sort of felt like everyone in the room was now breathing down his neck. He never thought a little attention would feel so unusual. He shook his head in an attempt to shake off the feeling and read the note.

Gabriel,
hope I spelled your name right. Jullien's been bugging my sister a lot lately about you. He's worried since you haven't called him. He told me he knows it's because you probably can't. Is your phone out or something? He wouldn't tell me what he meant by that. Anyways, he really, really wants to talk to you. He gave me his cell number and told me to give it to you and have you call him today from the payphones while we're at lunch. Don't run off like you normally do after class, okay? Wait for me. See ya then! Oh, and don't write back. Mrs. Howell's good at catching notes.
-Amanda

Gaibriel tucked the note into the back of his notebook and glanced up at the clock. There was still ten minutes left in class. His hands fidgeted worriedly. He didn't have any money on him. He couldn't call Jullien. What would Jullien think? He'd probably think Gaibriel hated him... or maybe that something really bad had happened. Gaibriel's leg began bouncing as well. Even if he did find a way to call Jullien, what would he say? What would Jullien ask him? Would he even be able to make his voice work? And this was definitely not going to help him get the blonde man off his mind. He wondered if he should even call.

'Maybe I should tell Amanda to tell him to leave me alone,' he thought to himself, no longer paying attention. 'But I don't think I really want him to leave me alone... And what if that hurts his feelings? He's been so nice to me... I don't want to do that.' Gaibriel frowned deeply, tapping his pencil's eraser on the notebook. 'I could lie and say everything's fine... Tell him my father apologized and stopped beating me or something like that. Maybe then he's loose interest. But I don't want that either..." Gaibriel shook his head a little. 'I have no idea what I want from this. I want him to leave me alone but I don't want him to. I wish it never happened and I am so happy I got the chance to meet him.'

Another jab in his back. He glanced back again.

"Dude, stop tapping like that."

Gaibriel blushed and muttered an apology, making a point to keep his body still when he turned back around. He resumed taking notes until the end of class.

The bell ring caught him by surprise and the lump in his throat grew about twice in size. He stood up, packing his books into his bag slowly, glancing over to see what Amanda was doing. She had slung her bag over one shoulder and was coming his way, smiling. He stuffed the last of his things inside and zipped it up as she came over to stand beside him.

"You nervous," she asked, right off the bat.

Gaibriel blushed a little as he slipped his arms into the straps on his book bag. He wondered if everyone was as open as Amanda and Jullien seemed to be when talking to new people. "I... I, uh, don't have any money to call him with."

They made their way out of the room, and began the slow walk up the crowded hallway to the lunchroom.

Amanda shrugged and dug some change out of her pocket. "Here, no problem."

"Oh, I can't take your money."

"Pssh, I got this off the ground while I was waiting for the bus this morning." She held it out to him. "Go on, take it. Jules is gonna have a nervous breakdown if you don't call him soon."

"Is he really that concerned about me?"

Amanda shrugged a little. "From what Judy says, your almost all he talks about. But then, Judy's uber jealous and she exaggerates a lot. But he did insist I have you call today so..."

She trailed off and Gaibriel went quiet as he began worrying again. He'd never even thought about that fact that Jullien might have just been being polite and really didn't want anything to do with him. He bit his lip, chewing on it nervously as they came into the spacious cafeteria. He could see the pay phones on the far wall, next to the main entrance. He wracked his brain for an excuse but still had not come up with anything by the time they were standing in front of the payphones. To save face, he would have to call. He was ashamed of feeling so giddy. Like a school boy with a crush. True, he was a school boy, but he'd always accredited himself as being much more mature than that.

He glanced over to see Amanda digging through her purse. After a few seconds, she produced a slip of paper. "Here ya go," she said, handing it over. "I think I'm just gonna let you talk in private. I'll be over sitting by the drink machines with my friends. Join us when you're done, okay?" She walked off with a small wave.

Gaibriel was torn between excitement at being invited, nervousness at doing so and giddiness about calling Jullien. He supposed he could lie and say he'd called but it would most likely get back around to her and then she might get angry at him. He shook his head and picked up the phone.

---

Jullien had been on pins and needles all day. He's managed to handle his calls so that his lunch hour would fall at the same time of the school's lunch hour. He now sat in the almost empty room, pacing in front of the vending machines anxiously. The lady sitting on the couch, watched him, a slightly aggravated expression on her face. Jullien had decided a few minutes ago that she would live despite her annoyance and he honestly hoped she'd leave before his phone rang. So far, she had not.

The woman had gotten up to refill her coffee. Jullien couldn't help but notice how her long skirt stopped just above her ankles, a bad choice, for her anklebones jutted out noticeably over her ugly brown shoes. Jullien huffed, turning his back to her, staring up at the clock and tapping his foot impatiently. Four minutes past Gaibriel's lunch hour. He'd told Amanda to call him if Gaibriel was not at school that day. She'd have called by now. Jullien's foot tapped harder, making his entire body bounce a little.

"I'm married. Happily." The woman's voice was ice-cold.

Jullien turned around, confused. "What?"

She crossed her legs, folding her arms in her lap and fixing him with a stony gaze. "I said I'm married."

This didn't clarify anything for Jullien. "And?"

She sighed, rolling her eyes like he was a impertinent child. "Stop flouncing around like that. Flirting with me won't get you anywhere."

Jullien was so taken-back he didn't know what to say. He stared at her in shock for a few moments, his eyebrows furrowed in a mix of confusion and shock. "What? I... you thought..." He stopped, mentally slapping himself to gather his thoughts. "Please, lady. Can't you tell I'm gay? Plus," he looked down at her feet. "You're shoes are ugly and draw attention to your bony ankles. I've got better taste."

Her mouth fell open in what Jullien guessed to be shock and appallment. "Why, how rude of you!"

He laughed, a short and humorless sound. "Me? I'm the one accusing other people of being a drooling dog just because they're pacing around the room impatiently. Now if you can get over yourself, I'd like to be impatient in peace." He turned his back to her again, resuming his foot-tapping. After just a few seconds, he heard the door slam as she left. His eyes went immediately back to the clock. Now it was six minutes. Great.

With a heavy sigh, Jullien made his way back to the couch, taking the seat the woman had just left so he could still watch the clock. He'd barely sat down when he heard the familiar chime of his cell phone. "Finally," he breathed, digging it out of his pocket.