Snowfall

He looked at me for a moment as if he were going to question me but then he nodded. \"And what have you decided, Albin?\"

\"I wish to be with you. I don\'t want to be without you, ever.\"

He looked down quickly and I watched a muscle twitch along his jaw. After composing himself he looked back up at me calmly. \"Are you certain, Albin, really certain?\"

\"Yes, I want to be with you always.\" I smiled shyly at him, funny how confessing my desires made me feel awkward.

\"Always...\" His eyes were distant and then he focused once more on me. \" and forever?\"

I knew what he was asking, did I wish to become like him. I had thought this over while staring at the ceiling of my cell at night. I could have said that I wanted to be with him but not like him. I think Amar would have accepted that but I would not want to leave him alone again. I was perhaps condemning my immortal soul but the choice seemed clear to me. I loved Amar and I wanted to be with him, always.

\"Yes, Forever, Amar.\" I held him more tightly. \"If you will have me. You promised to tell me what you wanted now that I have made my choice.\"

He laughed quietly and then looked at me, a smile still lingering in his eyes; it was so good not to see them haunted with pain as I had so many times before. \" I would have thought I was having a hard time keeping my desires secret. Hmm, if you are confused about them perhaps I have done something wrong?\" He lifted an eyebrow at me.

\"Hmmmph.\" I pretended to pout. In the past this was used to great affect on my mother, soulful blue eyes, quavering bottom lip. I watched him through the screen of a few curls.

\"Ah, stop that! You make me want to bite you for certain. Its very tempting you know.\" He leaned forward then and gently nipped my lip before I had time to protest. \"All right. A promise is a promise. I was getting to it.\" Taking a deep breath, Amar looked at me a long moment before beginning.

\"I could not hope for something so wonderful as having you with me for eternity, Albin. It was the secret innermost wish in this old body. I\'ve never known someone who accepts me as you do. There have been those who\'ve wanted the power of what I am and many more who\'ve feared me but only you have looked beyond this.\" He raised a hand to his face \"and instead looked at this.\" He then placed it over his heart. \"You\'ve made me more happy then I\'ve ever been. I\'ve looked forward to the night and that is something I have not done in a long time. To look forward to the future, I\'ve spent many years now just existing but I dream of sharing the world with you.\"

Tears welled up in my eyes and one managed to spill down my cheek. Amar kissed it away and continued kissing me, I held on to him desperately, feeling the warmth of his lips against my neck. I had never thought about him needing to be simply accepted as I, myself, had longed for. He seemed so poised and confident but it was all a mask that he\'d had years to perfect. I alone was allowed to see beyond it to the vulnerable spirit that lay beneath.

I waited for his bite and eventually grew tense with expectation. \"Does it hurt, Amar?\"

He pulled back from me a moment. \" I do not know. I believe that when you are accepting of it, it does not hurt. Did the woman you watched earlier appear to be in pain?\" I shook my head no. \"For me, it was quite painful but it was something I resisted. I had watched my friends die by the monster who made me and I struggled against him. The blood carries the emotions of the person. I personally do not like the taste of fear but there are those of my kind who revel in it.\" He frowned. \"Luckily we are not many but I had not planned to bite you this night, Mon Cher.\"

I looked disappointed and he laughed before explaining.

\"There is your friend the priest. Do you wish him to worry? Or for them to search for you for many days?\"

I had not thought of this. I had not thought of Father John at all in my longing to be with Amar. The image of him standing at the top window of the Abbey waiting for me to come home caused me a severe pang of guilt. I could not do that to him again if it could be helped.

\"I will take care of it. I think your priest is a good man and I would hate to see him worry about you. \"