Starting Over

I JUST WANT TO THANK EVERYONE WHO HAS REVIEWED THIS STORY SO FAR. PLEASE KNOW THAT I DON\'T TAKE YOUR COMMENTS AND SUGGESTIONS LIGHTLY. THEY MEAN A LOT TO ME!

-----
Sitting on his bed reading, Batey heard a knock on the door. “Come in,” he called out.

“Hello, darling,” his mother greeted him, an anxious expression in her eyes. She closed the door behind her before continuing. “Are you busy?”

“No,” Batey shook his head and sat up. “What’s going on?”

”Well, I just received an e-mail from your brother,” she told him as she sat at the end of the bed. “It looks like he’s going to be coming for a visit in a few weeks.”

“That’s great,” Batey said, although he was surprised. His brother hadn’t been home once, not even for the holidays, since he had enlisted. “How long will he be here for?”

“It’s just a week,” his mother explained. “But…I need to talk to you first.” Giving his mother a curious expression, Batey silently encouraged her to go on. “Before Benjamin agreed to come, he asked me if your father was still… if things were the same as before he left. Now, I hate lying to my children, Andrew, but he won’t come if he knows. So I told him no, that things had been settled between us.”

“And you need for me to not tell him the truth?” Batey asked.

“I know you don’t want to lie,” his mother replied. “But… oh, I’ve missed Ben so for the last four years. I don’t want to lose him again.” Her eyes were brimming with tears, and Batey moved down the bed so he could put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “So yes, I’m asking you to not tell him the truth, and also, to not be so hostile towards your father while Ben is here. If you are, he’ll know the truth.”

Raising an eyebrow, Batey sat silently for a minute. “I don’t like this,” he started. “But I know how much you’ve missed Ben. And I have, too.”

Throwing her arms around her son, Batey’s mother thanked him. “I’m just so happy I get to have both my boys home at the same time,” she told him. “Thank you, darling. I love you so much.”

-----

“So what’s your brother like?” Catherine asked curiously. She was sitting on her bedroom floor, her back propped up against the bed, with Batey’s head in her lap as she languidly played with his hair.

A small smile played on Batey’s lips before he answered. “I used to worship Ben,” he told her. “He was five years older than me, and I always thought he was the coolest person in the world. I mean, he was this crazy mixture of things. He was a terrific athlete, but he was also an artist. He always had all these friends, all these girls calling and coming around, but he was nice to everybody - everybody.”

“That sounds familiar,” Catherine teased him, tickling his nose with a lock of his hair, making him grin up at her.

“I guess I always wanted to be just like him,” Batey admitted and then frowned. “And then, right around when I was turned fourteen, he just seemed to change. He got so closed off and didn’t want anything to do with the rest of the family. I didn’t understand then, but that was when he… he had found out.” Sighing, Batey shook his head. “Then he just came home one day and told us he had enlisted in the Army. It was a complete shock. I mean, he had graduated high school six months earlier, and he had said he was going to work a year before going to college. I remember being so excited about that, because it meant I got to have him home another year. Then, bam, he’s gone out of my, er, our lives. I can probably count the number of times I’ve talked to him since then on my hands.”

Batey looked so distressed to Catherine; she yearned to be able to say something to make him feel better. “Well, maybe this is your chance to make up for lost time,” she said encouragingly.

Looking up at Catherine’s hopeful expression, Batey gave her a smile. The past month since they had first gotten together had been wonderful. No matter what was going wrong in his life, just seeing her smile and holding her close made him feel like everything would turn out fine in the end. He reached up behind her head, threading his hand into the hair at the nape of her neck and pulling her down to kiss him softly. She smiled down at him. “This is a little awkward,” she giggled at the position they were in.

Chuckling, Batey had to agree. Pulling himself up so he was seated next to her, Batey leaned over so he could take her face in his hands. His eyes drank in her features before he brought his mouth to hers again, starting with gentle kisses that quickly grew in intensity.

With her heart rate increasing as it always did when Batey kissed her, Catherine ran her hand in his hair. As his mouth moved to her neck, she tilted her head back and tried to even out her heavy breaths. “Should we move onto the bed?” she whispered, and Batey pulled back to nod.

Climbing onto the bed, Catherine watched with desire as Batey covered his body with hers. He brushed his lips softly against her lips before moving his mouth back down over her jaw and to her neck. One hand wandered over the front of Catherine’s shirt, massaging her. Slowly, nervously that hand began unbuttoning Catherine’s shirt, and her body felt like it was on fire by the time Batey was able to run his hand over her bra-covered breast. His thumb barely grazed the fabric before Catherine’s nipple grew hard.

Batey slowly led kisses down Catherine’s neck, over the hollow of her throat, and down to the fabric of her bra. His body was so turned on, he knew there was no way Catherine couldn’t feel his erection against her thigh, and the thought made heat rise in his cheeks. Still, he forced himself to sit up, kneeling between Catherine’s thighs and looking down before going any further.

“Hey,” she whispered up to him with a smile. “Whatcha doing?”

“Using every ounce of self-control in my body,” he grinned back. “No, just… like we said, we want to take things slowly. I just want to make sure it’s all right if I… you know, continue like this.”

Leaning up on her elbows, Catherine gave Batey a smile. “We have been moving at a snail’s pace,” she reminded him, the admiration evident in her voice. “What do you want to do to me?” she gave him a sexy smirk.

“Oh, don’t ask that question. It’s way too tempting,” Batey grinned as he leaned over and finished unbuttoning her shirt.

Catherine leaned up to let Batey remove her shirt and bra. “You are so beautiful,” he told her as he looked down at her half dressed form. His words and smile made Catherine blush.

“You take yours off, too,” Catherine instructed, and Batey obliged, removing his shirt. As he lay back down, they both reveled in the feeling of their bare skin against the other. They spent several minutes just kissing, both loving how it felt to be together like this. Catherine’s skin was satiny, but her nipples were hard, scraping against Batey’s skin as he pressed his mouth to hers. As his lips moved down, exploring her neck, her chest, and finally her breasts, Catherine let out a contented sigh. This felt perfect.

Batey took one breast into his hand, pressing gently. He let his mouth wander down to her nipple, taking plenty of time to run small circles around the erect skin with the tip of his tongue before finally wrapping his mouth around it, his lips pulling gently, sucking at her. Catherine’s back arched, her body aching, as she ran her hands through his hair. Batey felt like he was about to explode, but he willed himself to relax.

We’re taking things slowly, Catherine had to keep reminding herself. Batey’s body was so firm, his mouth so tender against her breast. She wanted him so badly, but she knew they shouldn’t... not yet. The moment would have to be just right, and for some reason, this moment wasn’t it. “Would you hold me?” she forced herself to ask. “Just like this.”

Immediately, Batey moved back up, sliding onto his side and wrapping his arms around Catherine. She was tall, but still she felt so small when her head was pressed up like this, hidden beneath his chin, and her chest bare, pressed up against him. “This is wonderful,” he told her honestly. Even though he wanted to be even closer to her, this was enough for now.

-----
A knock came at the door, waking Batey and Catherine from their restful sleep. “Honey,” Catherine’s mother called out. “We’re home from dinner.”

“Shit,” Catherine whispered, looking at Batey, who had also woken up at the knock and looked very nervous. They hadn’t meant to fall asleep; they had just been so relaxed, they had both dozed off. “Um, hi Mom. I guess… I guess I fell asleep. I’ll be right out,” Catherine called.

“What do I do?” Batey whispered nervously as he stood up and started pulling on his shirt. Catherine’s room was on the second floor; it wasn’t like he could climb out the window. It was easily a twenty-foot drop.

Pulling her t-shirt over her head, Catherine walked over to him and gave him a smile as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Relax,” she said, kissing him softly on the lips. “Stay here. They’ll only be awake another half hour or so. I’ll drive you home after they go to bed.”

Nodding, Batey put his arms around Catherine’s waist and pulled her closer to him, kissing her lightly on the nose. “Sorry, I just don’t want to get you in trouble,” he explained.

“You won’t,” Catherine promised. “And even if you did, tonight was well worth it.”

Chuckling, Batey lowered his mouth to hers for a short but deep kiss. “I love you,” he murmured, and then froze. Even though he had known for some time that he felt this way about Catherine, he hadn’t actually said the words out loud.

Catherine smiled at his tenseness. “Good,” she told him. “Because I love you, too.”

Dropping his forehead to touch hers, Batey looked Catherine in the eye. “Really?” he asked nervously, afraid she was only saying it because he had. He didn’t want that.

Looking deep into his eyes, Catherine gave him a grin. “I love you, Andrew Bates,” she said softly. With that, she buried her head into his shoulder and let him hold her tightly. After a minute, she reluctantly pulled back. “I really should get downstairs, though,” she told him.

Nodding, Batey had a look of complete happiness on his face that Catherine hadn’t seen before. “I’ll just wait here,” he told her. As she left the room, closing the door behind her, he sat down on the bed again. “She loves me,” he marveled to himself as he leaned back into the pillows. “This is very, very good.”

-----

“I really like Alanna,” Catherine told Batey on Sunday night. They had just come from Karma, where they had met up with James and his girlfriend. Unlike other girls he had dated in the past, Alanna was strong-willed and very intelligent. Still, she seemed to have a weakness for the gorgeous dark-haired boy. “She seems like the perfect… opponent for James.”

Chuckling, Batey smiled as he wrapped his arm around Catherine’s shoulders and they walked towards his car. “She keeps him on his toes, that’s for sure,” he admitted. While he too thought Alanna was very cool, he had a gnawing doubt that James might not be able to keep up with her. “Are you sure she might not be too much for him, though?” he asked as he unlocked the passenger side door.

“Oh, please,” Catherine pressed her palms against Batey’s chest and smiled up into his face. “Aren’t challenging relationships the sort that were made to last?”

“I believe so,” Batey laughed, encircling her in his arms and leaning down to kiss Catherine softly. “Have I told you tonight that I love you?” he asked.

“Only about ten times,” Catherine giggled. “But I love you, too.”

-----

“Wait,” Catherine said breathlessly one afternoon a couple weeks later. They had gotten home from rehearsal a little while earlier; as Batey had predicted, they had both gotten leading roles. When they had gotten back to Batey’s, the house had been empty. They had wandered into his room and begun making out, as usual, but things had quickly escalated.

“Okay,” Batey replied immediately, lifting himself from her body and sliding up next to her again. God, he wanted her so badly, but he knew they were trying to wait… for something. Right now, all the blood had rushed from his head, and he couldn’t remember exactly what it was they were waiting for.

They had shed their tops almost immediately, but when Batey’s mouth had wandered down Catherine’s chest and stomach, he had automatically begun to unbutton her jeans. Catherine looked at him panting, obviously straining with desire, but still holding himself back at her request. “I’m not saying you can’t… do that,” Catherine blushed. “We just need…”

“To know where the boundaries lie?” Batey questioned softly, pushing a wisp of hair from her forehead.

“No, that’s not what I meant,” Catherine said, obviously frustrated by her desire. “I don’t know if I want to adhere to boundaries anymore.” Catherine looked at him, her brow furrowed. “I mean, I love you, and you love me. So why are we waiting again?”

Brushing a kiss against her lips, Batey smiled. “Well, I guess because sex hasn’t exactly had the best consequences in either of our lives,” he reminded her. “And we don’t want to ruin what we have. Plus, when we do decide to, I want it to be perfect.”

“That seems dumb,” Catherine said plainly, looking into his eyes with longing. “Sex wasn’t the problem in our relationships; the people we were with were. And anyway, being with you… it will be perfect, whether we wait longer or… if we do it right now.”

“Catherine, I don’t mean to sound like a dick, but you have to let me know what you really want,” Batey looked at her. “Because right now the idea of being inside you…”

Leaning up, Catherine ran her fingernails over Batey’s back and pressed her mouth to his, savoring in the feeling. “I said wait just now because I wanted to ask if you have condoms here. I want you,” she whispered into his ear. “Now. Inside me.”

“I have condoms,” he whispered back. There was no amount of willpower that was going to make it possible for Batey to turn Catherine down. Heat had been radiating from Batey’s skin as Catherine’s fingers ran over it. She felt him begin kissing her more deeply, with more hunger and desire. She felt one hand move down from her jaw, tracing her neck, and slowly moving down to her breast, massaging it gently.

Batey began tracing soft kisses on Catherine’s neck and sucked at the sensitive spot below her ear. Catherine’s body ached as she glanced down and watched as Batey began kissing her collarbone again, his lips sweeping over her chest until he reached her breast. His tongue ran around her nipple, causing her to arch her back in pleasure. As he cupped her breast with his hand and took her nipple into his mouth, Catherine slid her hands into his hair and let out a small moan, encouraging him to continue. He sucked at her nipple, teasing it with his tongue, almost eliciting a groan from Catherine when he released it to move his mouth down to her stomach.

“Now, you’re sure you want to-” Batey asked nervously as his hand played with the button on her jeans.

“God, yes,” Catherine interrupted, her voice firm. Batey chuckled, and began sliding off her jeans and underwear. He leaned down to kiss her thighs, his mouth inching up as he coaxed her to open her legs. As his mouth grazed over Catherine, she shivered. He was placing soft kisses on her before he let his tongue taste her. He sucked on her clit and was pleased to hear Catherine moan. He delved the tip of his tongue inside her before moving his mouth back to her clit and letting a finger wander inside her. Catherine’s body tensed at the sensation, but quickly relaxed, and Batey slid a second finger in, reveling in her warmth and moisture.

Batey was moving with gentleness, but he knew what he was doing. His lips sucked gently at Catherine, his fingers teasing her. Catherine wasn’t even sure how she caught her breath. “Please, baby, I want you…”

Batey smiled at her words, moving up alongside Catherine’s body to meet her mouth with a kiss. He let Catherine undo his belt and jeans, sliding out of them quickly along with his boxers. As he felt Catherine wrap her hand around him, he let out a little groan. It turned her on to feel how his body quivered at her touch. Gently, she began stroking him with long, slow, even caresses as she leaned over to run kisses over his neck at the same time.

Batey felt like his body was on fire. Catherine’s hair tickled his skin as her mouth traced wet kisses over his collarbone, and her hand moved with just the right speed and pressure. It had been months since a woman had touched him like that, and the fact that it was Catherine that was now doing it…

“Condoms,” Batey said suddenly, making Catherine giggle as she released him. Blushing, he leaned over to his bedside table and pulled out a box, removing one packet from the bunch. “How would you like to do this?” he asked as he pulled himself to his knees.

“Do you mind being on top?” Catherine replied. Suddenly, out of nowhere, she felt worried. She had never been with anyone besides Marcus, but Batey had been with an older woman for four years. She was afraid…

Batey leaned down and kissed Catherine. “Don’t be nervous,” he said softly, as though he had read her mind again. “Like you said, this is going to be perfect. It doesn’t matter to me what position we’re in. All that matters is that I love you.”

Nodding, Catherine tried to swallow the lump in her throat. “I love you, too,” she replied honestly. She watched as Batey opened the packet and removed the condom, slipping it onto his erection. He lay down on Catherine and began kissing her slowly and tenderly, like her had the first day they kissed. Their bodies were pressing against each other, and Catherine felt him slide his hand down to position himself. Finally, he gently began pushing inside her.

As Catherine’s body surrounded him with heat and pressure, Batey couldn’t help but to moan. He raised himself onto his forearms, looking into Catherine’s eyes as he began a slow pace of moving in and out of her. Catherine was smiling, running her hands over his arms as he leaned down to kiss her, and she began to rock her hips to meet Batey’s thrusts. He let his eyes close so he could concentrate on the feeling of sinking into Catherine’s warmth over and over.

It had about a year since Catherine had last had sex, and she had been surprised at how tight she had felt when Batey entered her. But his movements were gentle and controlled, and Catherine quickly fell into a rhythm with him. As she slid one hand behind his head, massaging his neck, she watched his closed-eye expression as she moved to meet his thrusts. His body pressed against hers, teasing her clit with each movement, and his strokes inside her were perfect, deep and slow. As she pulled his mouth down to hers, she felt his body melt on top of her.

“God, Catherine,” Batey whispered into her mouth as he opened his eyes. “This feels so…”

“I know,” Catherine replied, moving her hips a little more to let him know he was welcome to speed up. Her body was starting to respond, and she wanted to feel him deeper. Immediately picking up on her cue, Batey slid an arm under her waist, tilting her hips, and began pushing into her harder. He was rewarded as Catherine slid her hands into his hair, closed her eyes and began moaning. “More,” she begged and Batey smiled, speeding up his hard thrusts as Catherine’s body rose to meet his. He hadn’t expected that Catherine would want to move so roughly, though he wasn’t disappointed to find this out about her.

“Oh, God,” Catherine was letting out little moans between her jagged breaths. “Please,” she begged, feeling her body so close. Batey slipped his hand from below her and slid it to her thigh, pushing her leg back slightly, giving himself more access to press into Catherine hard and fast. She moaned loudly one last time as he felt her body tense, her muscles contracting around him. Batey had been doing his best to hold back his own orgasm, but as he felt the tight hotness press against him, he let himself thrust into Catherine a few more times, until his body finally released itself, and he could feel waves of pleasure and a pulsing like a heartbeat inside Catherine.

Still rocking, but now slowly, Batey kissed Catherine softly on the lips. “How was that?” he smiled as she opened her eyes.

“Sorry if I got a little demanding,” Catherine blushed. “It’s been a really long time…”

“No apologies necessary,” he told her. “That was so… wonderful. I love you so much. And I’m glad we waited.”

“Me too,” Catherine smiled. “This was perfect-”

Catherine’s words were cut off, though, by the door opening. “Hey, Andy, I just got in… Oh, shit, sorry,” the person stuttered as he closed the door again.

Frozen, Catherine looked at Batey. “And that was…?” she finally forced out.

“That was my brother,” Batey told her, his throat dry. “I am so sorry Catherine,” he rushed to add. “My parents aren’t due home for hours, and Ben wasn’t supposed to arrive until tomorrow.”

“I guess I made some impression, huh?” Catherine’s cheeks were a deep scarlet.

“Please, he’s not going to think anything…” Batey had to pull himself from Catherine, but refused to lift his body otherwise as he looked into her eyes. “I’m sorry. I don’t want you to regret-”

“Shut up,” Catherine grinned. “I’m embarrassed; I’ll get over it. I couldn’t regret this…” She looked into Batey’s warm eyes as she ran her hands over his back. “I just got have you inside me… to be that close to you. I will never regret it.”

“Thank you,” Batey kissed her lips. “So… ready to get dressed and meet my brother?”

“Ugh,” Catherine laughed as Batey rose off her. “I guess so,” she told him as she sat up. “This is so humiliating.”

Sitting next to her, Batey laughed and pulled her into a warm hug. “Thank you, Catherine,” he said again as he kissed her head. “For your friendship, for today, for loving me … Just, thank you. I love you so much.”

With her eyes growing glassy, Catherine buried her head in Batey’s shoulder. “That’ll teach me to expect sex to ever be perfect,” she grumbled, and felt Batey laugh in return.

-----

“So, who’s the girl?” Ben asked teasingly to Batey over the bowl of Cheerios he was eating at the kitchen table. Batey had just walked in the room while Catherine was still getting herself together in his room.

“That’s my girlfriend, Catherine,” Batey tried to give him a dirty look, but couldn’t help but smile.

Trying to keep a straight face, Ben nodded. “She seems… smart.”

“Shut up,” Batey laughed, taking a seat across from his brother. “You weren’t supposed to be here until tomorrow.”

“So you and Catherine usually have sex in your bedroom with the door unlocked when I’m not here?” Ben joked.

Shaking his head, Batey couldn’t stop grinning even though he wanted to. He felt too good. “First of all, no one’s due home for a couple hours,” he told his brother. “More importantly, though, you come home one time in four years and manage to interrupt mine and Catherine’s first… you know, TIME together.”

Nearly choking on a bite of cereal, Ben started laughing hard. “Dude,” he coughed. “I’m sorry. Wow, that’s… that’s funny.”

Catherine had walked in to find Ben cracking up at the kitchen table and Batey trying to bite back his grin. “Hi,” she said, her cheeks bright red. “You must be Ben. I’m Catherine.”

Looking up at the blushing girl, Ben gave her a smile. “Hey. Listen, I’m sorry about that. I guess I just never thought that my little brother might be…”

“Let’s just never speak of this again,” Catherine groaned as she covered her face with her hands, making the boys laugh harder. She sat down at the table and smiled at Batey as he reached over to place his hand on her knee. “Please, Ben, just… try to forget everything.”

“Believe me,” Ben laughed. “I would if I could.”

-----

When Batey and Ben’s mother returned from work, she walked into the kitchen to finder her sons and Catherine sitting around the table. Tears filled her eyes as she dropped her briefcase on the floor and ran to Ben, who was rising to greet her.

“Ben, oh darling, you weren’t supposed to get here until tomorrow,” she hugged her son tightly. “Oh, I’m just so glad you’re here. Let me get a look at you,” she said, stepping back, and Catherine looked over.

About the same height as Batey, Ben was more muscular in comparison to Batey’s firm, lean physique. The two boys shared most of their features, although Ben’s crew cut hair stood in stark difference to Batey’s soft chin-length style. Catherine felt a wave of sympathy as she watched their mother study him closely and then reach up to touch his face. “You look so grown up,” she smiled sadly.

Feeling like she was interfering on a personal moment, Catherine rose. “I should get home,” she said, feeling Batey rise behind her. “It was nice to meet you Ben,” she blushed and saw him give her a smirk, but his mother didn’t notice.

“I’ll walk you out,” Batey told her, taking Catherine’s hand. At the front door, he spun Catherine around and pressed her back into the door, making her giggle. He leaned down, pinning her body with his, and kissed her. His mouth was soft and warm as he sucked on her bottom lip. He delved his tongue into her mouth as he ran his hands over her shoulders. His breath was hot on her mouth as the deep kiss drew to a close.

Breathlessly, Catherine pulled back and looked up into Batey’s eyes. “Looking for someone else in your family to catch us in a compromising position?” she smirked, causing Batey to chuckle.

“I am sorry about that,” he said softly, sliding his hand under her chin and running his thumb over her lips softly. His expression quickly grew serious. “I really hope you don’t regret-”

“No,” Catherine said in a low voice, reaching her arms up around his neck. “Not my favorite way to meet your brother, I’ll admit,” she laughed, then dropped her voice to a whisper. “But as for us… I don’t have one regret. I love you, and I loved being with you.” She smirked again. “Besides, you’re pretty good in bed.”

Laughing happily, Batey pulled Catherine into a hug. “I love you so much,” he breathed into Catherine’s hair. “I don’t ever remember being this happy.”

“Me either,” she told him, feeling safe in his embrace.

-----