My Desirable Prison

Disclaimer: This story belongs to me. I’m not making any money off of this. : (

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I’m glad a have a few loyal readers left and even some new ones! Hope you enjoy the new chapter. Any feedback is always welcome.


(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((


Chapter 11


)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


It was a beautiful night; a cloud free sky with stars shining brilliantly through the pollution of the city. It was pissing him off. He wanted rain, thunder or even a tornado. Anything, anything that would mirror the turmoil he felt inside. The swirling rage, hot like molten lava felt like it was literally tearing his insides apart. The rage was only on the surface, the only feeling Jesse allowed himself to feel. Even so, he knew that under all the anger he knew there was a wealth of pain and more importantly hopelessness. Just when he thought his life had finally come to the point where it was meant to be – well it was obvious how wrong he was about that.



It was hard to believe that less than 24 hours ago he had been a man who was loved. A bitter and slightly hysterical laugh burst from his lips as he stumbled along…where was he again? He had already left the grounds of the estate some 20 minutes ago and now he was walking slowly toward the general direction of the bright lights he saw. It was kind of hard to know where you’re going when you’re blinded with tears. He really had no idea where he was going. Where was there left to go? No matter how much he wanted to deny, he knew that he had left his whole life, along with his heart, on the floor of his old bedroom.


He finally made it to the heart of the city. He didn’t know how long it took him and he didn’t care. He vaguely saw people huddled in thick coats and dimly realized that he had left without a coat. That would probably explain why his teeth were chattering. He didn’t feel the cold though. Maybe it was because he was cold all over, both inside and out. He turned as if in slow motion toward the insistent honking of a car horn, only to hear “How much I got to shell out for you to suck my cock pretty boy?” It wasn’t the most creative lines he had heard from Johns but it got his attention. He had left his wallet in his hurry to leave so he had no money. He felt his feet slowing and he registered the man’s lecherous grin and all he could think of was //What’s another blowjob? It’s not like I haven’t done it a million times before// He moved closer to the car door, leaning lower so that the man could hear him clearly.


“You don’t have that kinda money you fucking asshole.” His smile was a shadow of its former self but he couldn’t help it after hearing the other man’s screams of profanity. There was a deep satisfaction in having turned down a trick. After experiencing a better life he didn’t think he could go back to the way he was before. He didn’t want to. He’d just have to find a way to survive other than selling his body.


He weaved through alleys and dark pathways with a familiarity that few could boast. It was easy to find one of the few safe havens he had known during his “old life” and as he walked through the doors of “The Mango Bar” he could feel its welcoming arms sucking him in again. He walked straight to the bar and sat down heavily on one of the worn out bar stools. In a second, Chuck, the bartender and owner, came to take his order. A look of surprise crossed his face when he realized who sat in front of him. “Jesse?”

Jesse looked up at the older man with a weak smile. “How’s it going, Chuck? The usual, please.”

“Sure thing, kid. I’ve been good. I’m surprised to see you here. Word is that you escaped the greedy clutches of old snake face and that you’re now shacking up with some rich boy in a mansion. Is it true? Did you finally break free from that bastard?” Chuck placed the glass of chilled Cranberry juice in front of Jesse, looking at the boy expectantly. He did like good gossip.


Sighing, Jesse took a tiny sip of his juice and contemplated whether he should bother responding. It was not like he was actually staying with Aidan so that information was no longer true. Sighing once again, he decided to tell Chuck the truth. He owed it to him; he had been one of the few people who had been kind to him. “It’s true. I don’t work for him anymore. I did live with someone but not anymore.” The last sentence was spoken softer than the rest and Jesse felt his throat starting to constrict once again.

Chuck nodded in understanding, told Jesse he’d be back and went to see what the newcomer to the bar wanted to order. Jesse lifted the glass once more to his lips, only to have the glass roughly removed from his hands. He turned to see who the rude asshole was and could only say “What the fuck?” Standing there like an idiot, sniffing his drink for alcohol was none other than Captain Durkheim.

“Ah, Jesse. Why am I not surprised? Back to your old ways I see.” Taking a sip of the red liquid, Jesse could see the disappointment in the old cougar’s face. //Guess he wanted a bit of vodka while on the clock// Jesse thought.

“Cranberry juice? You got your period?” Jesse could tell that the Captain was impressed with his amazing ability to use a line from “The Departed.”


“Yeah I do. I guess we can rule out me having your kid. What do you want Durkheim? Don’t you have prisoners to bugger?” He was not in the mood to deal with the man and his bullshit tonight. He just wanted time to think. He need time to figure out what he was going to do with his life.

“No, I’m saving myself for your sweet ass. Besides, we both know that you’d like it better than the rest of them.” Durkheim grabbed a handful of the germ infested peanuts on the bar and tossed them into his mouth. Jesse felt a shudder of disgust down his back. He didn’t know if the shudder was for the various diseases that Durkheim just contracted or the fact that Durkheim had just called his ass sweet. It was probably due to the sweet ass comment; it had to be.


“Are you going to tell me why you’re bothering me or do I have to sit here all night with you looking at me?” Jesse asked coolly. He took another sip of his juice and stared at Durkheim.


With a smirk that didn’t sit well with Jesse, Durkheim unhooked his handcuffs from his belt. Sliding off of the stool, Jesse inched away from the restraints that were swinging tauntingly before him. It was in his experience that handcuffs in a cop’s hand were never a good thing. That feeling of calmness went out the window when Durkheim swung those cuffs in his face. “What are those for Durkheim?” He bumped against the stool behind, stumbling in his eagerness to get away. Durkheim steadied him, only to use his hold on him to slam him onto the counter.


Chuckling, Durkheim slapped the cuffs around Jesse’s wrists and started reading him his rights. He ignored the younger boy’s wild thrashing and hauled him up into a standing position. Pushing him roughly, Durkheim led Jesse out of the bar and into the waiting squad car. He went to driver’s side, taking a moment to compose himself. He always felt guilty every time he had to pick the kid up. He had hoped that by living with the rich boy, Jesse would learn to clean up his act but here he was, yet again, in the back for a squad car. Sighing, he opened the door, hopped in and drove off to the station where Jesse was going to be picked up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jesse gazed out the window in pure misery. It seemed that nothing in his life would ever turn out the way he wanted. He blinked away the tears welling in his eyes because they served no purpose; his tears wouldn’t change the fact that his life was a fucked up mess. All he had wanted growing up was to make his parents proud, continue the family business and to be happy. It was too bad that none of those things came to pass. He had been happy in the last few months, more happy than he could have imagined. He wanted to laugh at how foolish he had been. He had been foolish enough to think that things were going to change, that he could have had true, lasting happiness. So lost in his thoughts, Jesse didn’t realize they had arrived at the station until Durkheim ordered him out of the car. He climbed out of the car, resigned to the fact that his life was never going to get better.


~~~~~~~~~~~

Aidan sat in the hard plastic chair in Chief Durkheim’s office. He was very relieved to hear that they had managed to find Jesse. He had worried about Jesse running off in the state that he had. The fact that he was the one who had put Jesse in that position made his heart ache. Sure he could argue the point that he had no idea that Bianca was going to make a surprise appearance but that hardly made up for the fact that he lied about being married. //She just *had* to come back when things were finally going well//.


Running his hands through his already tousled hair, Aidan lifted his head when the office door opened. A weight felt as if it had been lifted, and then he saw Jesse’s face; the weight came slamming back down. He knew he deserved the look of disgust the young man gave him but knowing that didn’t make it any better. He rose to his feet, his hand reaching out to touch Jesse, only to pull it back when Jesse stepped away.




Jesse walked further into the room, being sure not to move to close to Aidan and trying to look as dignified as possible with his hands behind his back in cuffs. He walked to Durkheim’s window, his back turned to Aidan. He’d rather look at the stars, at the dark apartment building windows, at the empty streets. Anything other than the man who held his heart and who had tainted it with a poisoned love.

“Jesse, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know she was coming. If I had known…” Aidan stopped speaking; his words seemed to make the other man more tense and unresponsive than when he had entered the room. He was at a loss; he didn’t know what words to say and he feared that there were none. He had to try though. He couldn’t bear seeing Jesse’s face pinched in anger and hurt. He wanted to see his eyes sparkling with joy, clouded with lust and warm with love. “I know I should have told you about her. It’s just….It’s just that things happened so quickly between us and I was planning on getting a divorce…”


Jesse briefly closed his eyes as if doing so would block out the sincerity he heard in Aidan’s voice. He forced himself not to go to Aidan and have him wrap his arms around him. He didn’t want to let him off the hook so easily but he didn’t want to give up what they had either. He opened his eyes and turned toward the older man with an expressionless face. “What does this mean for us Aidan?” He voice was deceptively soft, his emotions hidden just below the surface, ready to erupt at any second.

Aidan shot a confused look at Jesse. “What do you mean? It’s going to be the same way it’s always been.” He walked closer to Jesse, encouraged when the brunette did not back away. He reached out and rubbed his hands soothingly up and down Jesse’s arms. “I love you, only you. I know that this might prove difficult but we can get through this. I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you I was married. I didn’t know what was happening between us and I didn’t want to ruin it.” He looked Jesse in the eyes and hoped that he saw that he meant every word. “I don’t know what’s going to happen. I do know that I want you to be a part of my life, no matter what happens. Please Jesse…..come home with me.”

Aidan waited anxiously. His face betrayed none of the nervousness he felt inside. Jesse *had* to say yes. He didn’t want to force him to come but he would if he had. He watched as Jesse searched his eyes once again and he hoped fervently he found whatever he was looking for. He breathed a sigh of relief when Jesse gave him a sharp nod. He wasn’t sure what that meant but he assumed it was agreement to going home with him. It wasn’t very encouraging but he would take what he could get. He pulled Jesse into a hug, taking it as a positive sign when he relaxed against him. Jesse was going home.

***********


Bianca sat in the family room’s large, dark brown leather and mahogany overstuffed couch. The lights were dark so the beauty of the Parisian cream walls with gold thread was hidden in darkness. She sat there in silence, the only sound being the steady tapping of her French manicured nails on the armrest. She was waiting for Aidan to return home to explain what the hell had happened earlier. It has been six hours. She had not gotten where she is today by being impatient. No, she will wait; all night if she had to.

***********

The car ride back to the house was silent and Jesse was grateful. He had the limo’s window down and he stared sightlessly out the window. He sat as far away as conceivable from Aidan even though all he wanted to do was sink into his embrace. He wouldn’t though. He could still smell the bitch’s perfume all over him. He wondered what he would do when he saw her again. He probably would do nothing because she was pregnant and no matter how much he wanted to beat her within an inch of her life, he couldn’t. Sighing, he looked at the place he had felt so happy in the last few weeks and it seemed to speak of future pain. He wasn’t sure he was ready for that promise but he had no choice. Putting steel in his spine, he opened the car door and walked toward the front door. He started when Aidan slipped his hand into his. A small smile flickered on his face. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. The smile fell from his face as soon as he walked through the door and he saw Bianca sitting there. Waiting.

***************************************************