The Tribuo - Book I

 

     “You know… I expected a hell of a lot more from the whole twin telepathy,” Jess said thoughtfully and I just stared at her.

   It’s been almost two weeks since that truck crashed into one of the gas pumps, which by some blind luck was out of order that night. If there was any gasoline in there, I don’t think anyone at that gas station would’ve survived the explosion. I guess I managed to push Rose out of the way, and was almost hit by that damn truck (that had some idiotic brake failure) myself, when Lucas pushed me away. Yeah, that would be such a great story with a great ending and all, if Jennah wasn’t killed in the process.

   I looked at Jess silently. I didn’t really care what she meant, but I knew she would share it with me anyway.

   “I mean,” she fiddled with the seam on her jeans. “I was supposed to feel that something bad happened to you, right? Well…” she bit her lip. “Matt, I felt nothing… And then someone called and…” she started crying again and I just turned away.

   Rose was trying to come and see me, and I told Jess to let her know that she could go to hell for all I cared. Stupid bitch just got a few bruises and scrapes and that was it. How is that fair? Ah, screw this. I looked at Jess.

   “Shut up,” I said quietly and she looked at me with huge eyes. “Knock it off, okay? There is no such thing as twin telepathy. It’s all bullshit.”

   “Matt…” she sniffled. “God, Matt, I am so…”

   I sat up on my bed.

   “Shut up, Jess,” I said again, and this time, she did. “Go do something, will you? I need to study for the tests that are coming up in the next decade or so, before I decide to kill myself. So just go away.”

   I knew that she wanted to stay and say something that was supposed to make me feel better. She wanted to hug me and cry together. She wanted to let me know that she would always be there for me. I could care less about all that crap. I was serious when I told her about studying. That was all I was going to do from now on. Nothing else mattered because nothing else meant anything.

****  

   I sat on the same bench where Lucas and I sat on that damn night. It was pretty cold already, even though it wasn’t October yet. I stretched my legs and shoved my hands into my pockets. The sun was almost down, and I narrowed my eyes against its dying light and against the cigarette smoke that decided to sneak under my sunglasses. I was smoking a lot lately and I didn’t care. Someone sat next to me. I briefly wondered why the hell they would choose this particular bench, when the entire park was pretty much abandoned.

   “Matt,” the person next to me said softly and I slowly turned my head.

   “You?” I said dully. “What do you want? And what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in Germany or something?”

   He shrugged.

   “I took some time off.”

   “Good for you,” I said absent-mindedly. “What do you want?”

   “It’s about Lucas,” he said, and I had a strongest desire to punch him. I didn’t.

   “Don’t,” I said instead and turned away from him. “Believe me, I know everything you want to say, so save your breath, okay? I gotta go, Seth,” I got up and kicked a little rock away.

   I started walking away and was relieved when he stayed on that bench. I had tears crawling down my face and I didn’t want him to see them.

   “Goddammit…” he growled behind my back and I stopped in spite of myself. I did not expect him to get pissed off. “Goddammit!” he repeated as if there was some great flavor to the word.

   I half-turned my head.

   “What is it?” I asked evenly.

   “If they would listen to me earlier,” he said in a strange voice. “I wouldn’t be here doing this stupid shit…”

   “I don’t know what you talking about,” I said and started to walk away again. If he is having some weird nervous breakdown, I don’t want to be a part of it.

   “Shit… He is alive, Matt!” he called loudly and I froze.

   Now he went after me. Except, he stopped before he could see my face.

   “What…” I muttered. “You are lying…”

   “I don’t lie,” he said tiredly as if it was a great curse. “He is alive. He’s not fine, but he will be.”

   “Why…” I don’t know what I was about to say. Why are you telling me this? Why did everyone try so hard to tell me that he died? Why didn’t he come back? Why…

   “I don’t know,” he said simply. “I don’t know why. And I don’t know if he’ll ever come back. But as long as he is alive, there is a chance, right?”

   I couldn’t move or speak. He is lying. He has to. But at the same time, I knew that he didn’t.

   “Take care, Matt,” he said quietly and he wasn’t there when I could finally turn around.