Clove : Book 4 of Lord Emperor Vampire Series

Claudius’ diary is back. I knew I had to work it in somewhere. It was too controversial to just scrap it. Whew… Oh, the brothers will be back next chappie….wait for it. Oh, there might be a need for a hankie alert. I got a little misty eyed.

I love the multi-page reviews. MAUH MAUH MAUH. Candy kisses and chocolate frogs to everyone one.

Rainy
O: And where's that little Vlad?? Is he still mopping around, cause I thought he'd be back there right with Haley once he heard that the brothers were found OR did you have him sent off somewhere far away doing something for the Pod?
A: Vladimir is around. Vladimir has been doing something Xavier asked him to, but I don’t think X meant it quite that way. When X finds out what Vladimir has been up to, that might be the end of the white Russian. 

Natana
Q: And ded, why not dedudshka ( = grandad, rather than ded = grandfather) ? I was a little bit surprised - it sounded quite stern to me. But, now , when I think about it you may be right - Claudius is Lord Emperor, after all
A: Read on…I think you will see why Ded is more appropriate at this time.

Lioncourt
Oh and by the way, "The heart asks the pleasure first" - great choice of song.
I cannot claim this as my find. Major props and kudos go out to Kiba21. It was mentioned in the story “Of Clouds and Blood.” I downloaded the song title just to hear it and fell in love with it. It played it continuously while I was writing.

HallowsEve
Wow. Just wow. Your review made me stumble to a stop – in a good way. Sometimes you can’t see the forest for the trees and your insight and round up of the cast of characters is amazing. This just points out that if Skell is going to stay around…I am going to have to ground him with someone pretty damn quick. Thanks!

Aurora0821
Nice to see you around. MAUH!
O: Don’t get Claudius making him wait to see him or yelling at him about the piano. Missing Sex is not a good enough reason to do this especially in the beginning of his healing process.. He is supposed to love his son. Even if he betrayed him by taking the mantel of lord emperor Claudius, Armor, and Marcus should be going out of their way to bring his memories back. I See, Claudius only making the situation worse by his behavior. Why would the brothers want to come back to this reality is this is how those who are supposed to love him the most act out like that. Why would Skell want to let them out?
A: Read on…MacDuff. Read on.

Thanks again to the LOYAL. I find I write better when I get reviews and questions and rants and other stuff. It makes me ramp it up. I could have settled for the original start, but it just didn’t feel right after a while and I am glad that you voiced your opinions. I think the flow of CLOVE is sooooo smooth now. It’s full steam ahead! MAUH!!!
Laur; Dark Avenger (x2); Rosemary; Rainy; Natana; meadows_peak; Spirit; Rosei; k; lioncourt; AsyenMari; HallowsEve; Aurora0821; A taste of Insanity; and nani

Chapter 147: Fathers and Sons

I only got half a cigarette finished before I got run to ground. Actually, I don’t think I was ever out of surveillance. Two eyes are better than electronic ones, and eight are even better. Extra long legs came crunching across the roof top gravel to pause in front of me.
I was going to get lectured by a blueberry.

“Would you care to sit on me? I have more padding than you;”

That was unexpected. He also moved as he was offering. Lanny settled himself behind me letting me lean against him. He opened his legs and cradled my hips between his upper thighs. “I want nothing more than to be totally selfish right now.” He pressed a nibble kiss to my left ear. “I have you to myself.” His arms came around me and I felt his face press against my shoulder and neck.

“Why do I hear a big but somewhere?”

“This body has been missed. Those who were here before you have been mourned. For some, painful though it was…they had moved on. For others…time has stood still.” He shifted slightly and pulled out a journal. “Your Father would never show this to you, but as a member of the Collective I must act in the best interests of my mission, you must read it. At least the entry I have marked.”

“It’s a diary. I can’t read his diary.” Unlike me, who knew that my written word would be read by strangers, I sincerely doubted that the Lord Emperor intended this.

“Now that you’re here, Lord Hashmalliam, I have ‘seen’ and your reign does not begin as of yet. Ground work must be laid first.”

I tried to twist but he tightened his grip. I had a feeling if I truly wanted to get up, I could but I would leave my pillow with it’s stuffin’ hanging out. “You need to greet your brothers. They have work out here to do. Hearts need to be healed. They need to greet their children as well. Your fears…” I got a gentle kiss to the nape of my neck, “you can cast them aside. You are a welcomed younger brother. One by one the original three fell under Orel Wessel’s onslaught. You were born to combat that void. Even if you didn’t know it, you saved them from extinction, Skell. They will welcome you.”

“Armor said I was gone for seven years. I only know of five. They took the first two. What I experienced was horrid enough. What did they go through? What did Wesel do to them to drive them away?”

Lanny took my cigarette and flicked it away. “You must stop that. Smoke is not good for your children…any of little ones under your roof.”

“My roof…it’s the Lord Emperors house.”

Lanny took the diary out of my hands and opened it up to the page he marked. “Read. Feel. Know what those who love you have endured in your absence.”

I took the book from his hand and looked down at the perfect penmanship. It looked like it had been done with a fountain pen. It was dated, three weeks ago.


July 5, 2014

It has been seven years and twenty-four minutes since my cherished Youngest disappeared out of my life. Out of our lives. Once I had five sons and in the span of a heartbeat, in a moment’s decision, I have only one left -- Marcus. My broken Eldest has become everything I wished him to be and more. He plays Father to my grandchildren. He has turned into a formidable First and Liaison to the Council. But the cost of that transformation has been high. A light has gone out in him. He is harder than before, colder than before. I think we all are. Marcus, my cherished Eldest, my sweetness and light has lost his music and his art.

Armor has gone. He has returned to his old ways. Marcus says kill. Armor kills then goes wherever he goes. He does not even stay for his son and daughters. I believe it hurts him more than one can imagine to see small versions of his Xavier playing in the corridors of Von Drachenfeld. Callia: Red and sassy. Raissa: Black and introspective. Alexander, my little Lex, white and bookish until you piss him off, then he is his Father through and through. Yet they all have their Mother’s blue eyes. They are growing straight and strong, Xavier. You would be proud of them. You should be here, they need their father. Your gentle loving guiding touch.

I realize now that I never fully appreciated the light and joy that Xavier, Azrael and Sex brought to us until it was taken away. Sex. My perfect partner and savior, I miss him with every breath. I would read those statements over the years in books on love and romance and in truth, I scoffed…until it happened to me, now the phrase with every breath is accurate. Our day was Sunday. I hate that day now. No matter how hard try to fill that day, my thoughts float back to pastel shades of glimmer on feathers of pristine white, the way your jade eyes would warm and darken when they looked at me, the taste of your cinnamon sweet kisses.

My beautiful Fallen Angel.

Where are you now? I know you are not dead. I cannot explain it, but I know that somewhere, somewhere out there beyond the hand of the Vampire, beyond the nose and pack call of the Lycan, beyond the touch of the Hellcats, my Love is alive. Somewhere. While there is life pulsing through my veins, I will continue to search for you. This I promise you, again. Another year has gone but I will continue to search for any sign of you.”

I have discovered your journals, Xavier. I did not know that you kept such things. Forgive me, but I have read them. I might have helped Armor make the decision to disappear until needed. The things he did to you as a human. It is no surprise that you were fractured. The broken Covenant. I understand why he did it. You would have chosen death. I never would have known Sex if you did. I never would have experienced this heartache. Nor, I would not have had babies to rock to sleep as daylight broke.

Claudia misses you. Everyone misses you. You have taken a large chunk of our hearts with you when you left.

Lex is calling for me. Let me end with this. Seven years and forty-five minutes ago you disappeared from our lives: Xavier, Lord Emperor; Azrael, the Angel of Death and Sex. And Sex, my beautiful Fallen Angel, but your presence remains with us daily. The tilt of a head. The frown on the forehead. The laughter and joy in simple things. I will find you. You saved me from certain death. It is only right I do that same. Keep the faith, my sons. I know you did not leave us willingly.

P.S. There is disturbing news coming from the Regency Hunters about a white haired rogue. He has been killing Bloods in a signature way…Glocks and blades. I pray that it isn’t you, my son. If it is, you may have fallen further than I can go.

I will end as always. Do not forget us. Your family waits for you, Lord Emperor. Come home, soon.

Lanny enfolded himself around me. I wasn’t even aware I was crying. “He called me Fallen…I mean, Sex.”

“Shhhhh….let it go. You have yet to mourn for your fledgling.”

“Kevin wasn’t my fledgling.”

‘Just because it wasn’t your fangs that pierced his neck at his birth, doesn’t mean that you were not his father. Just like in the human world, there are though who should not be parents in ours.”

“I shot him.”

Lanny pressed me back tightly against his chest. His around wrapped around my shoulders. “He lies at peace with your other lost son under the marble wings of an ebony angel. I can comfort this body…Skell, you need your brothers to comfort your soul. They have been trapped in the darkness for years. Set them free.”

“But I have to destroy, Orel Wessel.”

“You will…just not today. Seek out your brothers, little lonely boy. Let them show you what it means to be loved. Let them return to those they love. You have read Claudius’ pain. Hearing you on the piano tore off the bandage on his gapping wound. He blames himself for the entire ordeal.”

“He didn’t drug me.”

“He sent your running outside of the protection of the Loyal. For a mere instant, they lost track of you and you vanished into the maw that is Orel Wessel. He bares that guilt and as you can see, it is crushing him.”

“I don’t know how to get to them. I’ve only seen them once off in a distance. I didn’t let them know I was there. I didn’t know if I could still exist after they return.”

Lanny planted tender kisses on the side of my neck. “How did that happen before?”

“I was dying.”

“Just unconscious or dying.”

“Kevin gut shot me.”

“Aside from Lycan, I cannot think of anyone who would want to kill you. I do know of someone who could beat you senseless.” Lanny said that with just a little bit too much glee in his voice.

I pulled my neck away. It didn’t matter that it felt really, really good. “I am not going to stand around and let myself be beaten unconscious. I don’t think Armor would like doing that.”

“Armor would sooner cut off his hand than raise it against you. I’m thinking of your grandfather.” He had me stumped with that one. I had nothing floating to the surface. “Up, let’s get this started, before Marcus finds a bottle to climb into. He’s someone else that is hard to find when he wants to disappear.”

“Lanny….Lanny.” I dug in my heels and jerked on my wrist. He stumbled backwards and looked at me. “I don’t want to leave yet….”

“I am sorry My Lord.” Lanny dropped down to his knee, the other was up and he pressed his chest to it. The arm on the same side as the downed knee was pressed knuckle first to the gravel and his blue hair puddled all around his head. “Forgive me. I forget that others have not seen what I have seen.”

“That must get annoying.”

“The Pod has told me so on many occasions.”

Pod? I got a warm fuzzy feeling from that. Peas? Er…okay. “I really need to see the Lord Emperor…” I lifted the diary. “I don’t feel right about having read this and there are some things he needs to know. Maybe Father will beat me senseless.”

I lifted Lanny’s chin. Even kneeling he was large and in charge. I swept his hair off his face and looked at his darkly tanned skin and deep into his crimson tinted eyes. “Have you…lain with this body?”

“I gave my virginity to Azrael. I have been waiting for his return. Now, your return.”

“You know you are too large to ever take me.”

“A side effect of my physical form due to the amount of power it must contain in order to serve you, Lord Hashmalliam. I offer this body up for your pleasure.”

I leaned forward and pressed a gently kiss to his lips. I closed my eyes and savored his blueberry essence. “I have a feeling, I could get drunk on you.”

“I think you are referring to elderberries.”

I laughed. “No, my lovely seer. Your’s is a heady essence that takes my mind off of things I should be doing. Get up, please.” I was now just a hairs breath away from nipple range on him. I never felt short before. “First things, first. Where is Father?”

“He is still in the music room. I will locate your Grandfather and bring him to the gym.”
Lanny took the initiative and sucked the fillings out of my head. He set me back on my feet and I had to blink a couple of times. Oh yeah, blueberry pound cake with a side order of ….damn you’re sexy. He smiled then turned and did his sauntering sashay across the roof. Maybe that was his normal walk. How the hell did he keep from getting his ass fucked for seven years?

His voice floated back to me as he disappeared down the access stairs, “I am for you, Lord Hashmalliam. I was created and sent here to serve you in every way you could desire. I wish no one else.”

I paused, that sounded like Azrael just got kicked to the curb.

Oh jees. First things first. I crossed the hallway in front of the kitchen and got handed a protein shake. The little waiter was gone before I could say thank you. I sucked at the straw. Strawberries. Everything tasted so much better now I wasn’t starving. I nodded back at the men in black and watched out of the corner of my eye as they called in my position. Well that should be happening anyway. How the hell did they know if I wasn’t an imposter or something? I sucked the shake dry long before I got the to the music room. I let the glass on a small table then paused as I heard the saddest piano music in the world eeking out from underneath the closed wooden door. That was music from a video game. I stood there listening—“To Zanarkland” from Final Fantasy X? The Lord Emperor didn’t strike me as a gamer.

I pushed open the door. There was my mind’s vision. The black hair man with his back toward me swaying with his emotional playing of a crimson concert grand. The pain that rang out was too much. I couldn’t listen to this. I crossed over to the piano and flipped the lid down. Emperor Father barely got his hands out of the way as the wooden lid snapped closed. Tears streamed down his face. He was momentarily stunned.

I reached out and cupped his cheek with my hand. “I know that I am not who you want but we need to talk. About this.” I lifted his black covered journal.

It happened so fast. One moment I was beside the piano the next I was laying against the wall with little stars of pain shooting behind my eyes from where my head connected against the concrete and my jaw stung. I used to think I was fast. He stalked towards me and I scrambled backwards along the wall getting some distance between us. I had been kidding Lanny when I said Father would beat the crap out of us. I said us. Maybe I was willing to claim kinship to the fallen brothers after all.

“That is personal and private. You had no right going through my things. This was locked in my bureau.”

Who the hell said bureau? “Would you have told me any of this?”

“Those were my own musings.” For every step Father made, I backed up until I made sure the red piano was between us. I didn’t think he’d destroy it to get to me. I could feel the power emanating off him. He was like a nuclear reactor. I could feel the air actually quiver with pulses of anger.

Well I was pissed too.

“Why do you hate me?” I tossed the journal across the waxed finish toward him. “What have I done to make you hate me? Do you hate me because this is what I had to become? Do you hate me because I did everything they told me so I could survive? Am I to blame because your beloved isn’t here?”

That comment stilled him. I think I just made it worse.

“I do not hate you.”

“Then why are you screaming at me! My memories are jumbled and out of order and out of personal points of view. I’m trying to make sense of it and you make me feel unwanted. My name is Skell. I’ve been gone for seven years but I only remember five of them. I have never met your sons…Xavier, Sex and Azrael. I have been alone in that hell hole and now I find myself in a different one. I’m a stand in. Everyone wants the original cast back on stage. It’s like I’m not good enough. I got us here. That should be good enough. For everyone.” My voice was emotional. Ever since I got here to Von Drachenfeld, I was one big hormone. Now my face hurt and tears leaked out at the corners. “That should be good enough. I’m home.”

I watched as he lay the book back on the closed lid. He slowly crossed back to the piano bench never letting his eyes waver from me. I leaned my elbows on the piano mainly because my hands were shaking. He sat and lifted the lid and began to slowly play that tune again. “Are you my Father?”

He said nothing. Rejection hurts just as badly as a bullet to the gut. I made a move toward the door.

“Sit.” He slid over on the bench. “Play.”

I just played his song a couple of octaves lower as he mirrored me on the right. When the final note rang out we sat side by side in uncomfortable silence. Right. I swiveled on the bench to get up.

“Since you’ve been gone, I have fallen back into old habits I had thought lost and forgotten.” He reached up and pulled the journal towards himself. The little page marker was still there. He opened it and read his entry, “Seven years, twenty-one days, 15 hours and 18 minutes. That is when I stopped counting and yes…you are my son, Skell.”

“I didn’t want to read your journal. I know they can be deeply personal writings in there. But I needed know that am I where I should be.”

Father pulled out the marker, snapped it closed with a bang then handed it over. “I was writing to you and your brothers. You should have it.”

“I’ve tried to schedule an appointment to see you.”

He stared forward, not looking at me. Still his words pulled at me. “I have avoided you. The pain in my heart was too much to bear. I see his face but he is not there. I asked him to learn the piano…” His hand came out and touched my face then my white braids as I stilled. That I didn’t know. I thought the desire for the piano was something that was mine. That in itself was another kick in the teeth. I blinked as Father ran his hand down my cheek, “I heard what you said, Skell…but I also need to know.”

“I don’t know if the brothers, my brothers are well. I have never met them.”

Father reached out and an arm lay across my shoulders. “We have done a poor job of welcoming you back into your family, Skell. Why did you need to make an appointment?”

“I need to destroy Orel Wessel.”

“Orel Wessel is targeted, my boy. We have discovered many of the cells and bases while searching for you. It will take a unified effort to take them all down and this is only in North America. The European sites, have been harder to locate. The bastards like the mountains.”

That felt odd to hear Father swear. Which was odd in itself because this was the first time I was listening to him at all. I held a hand to my forehead. “Are you still in pain?”

“I’m confused.”

“How so?”

“I call you Father, but I have memories that are not very fatherly. You’re more like a lover but…if you’re my Father we shouldn’t be doing these…things. Then Armor said he birthed me, so…everything is mixed up.”

“If you want something that will really confuse you…you saved my life, I was re-born through you. Based on the Blue Blood transfer, you are my father and I am your son.” He said that with a wry amusement. I think. He turned my face toward him and looked deeply into my eyes. “Greetings, little fledgling. I am Claudius. I have challenged your birth father and made you my son not because I had to have you as a lover, but because your first father was incapable of teaching you all you needed to know to survive in the Vampire Nation. It was just beyond his abilities.’

‘I have been strict with you in the past. I have tried to be the best teacher I could be…and yes, I am madly in love with one of your brothers, Skell When you read that journal, you will know which one it is.”

“It’s Sex.” I whispered as I was awash with feelings and memories that were not my own. It mixed me up inside. I saw it. I felt it. The anguish and pain. The determination and force of will that Sex had to keep his love, his heart and muse in this world. In my mind’s eye, my hands were bloody and cut from the efforts. He would change heaven and earth to keep Claudius with him. “Sasha.” That name rang through my head. While he fought for his love, Sasha sang through his veins, rang in his heart. So close and yet so far. I have never felt even half of this. If I did, I would have died with Kevin in that parking garage. I would have found a way.

It’s never good to be found lacking.

I closed my eyes. I can’t deny them. It’s not right to deny what they survived for. The brothers. My brothers. Xavier had Armor. Azrael had the as of yet, un-met Marcus and Sex had Sasha.

I was caught in a tight embrace. The scent of cloves filled my nostrils. Orel Wessel didn’t know about Sasha, otherwise there would have been an apple/clove trigger. I’d have to remember that. That was odd. They knew about the broken Covenant but nothing about Claudius.

There was a knock at the door and a man in black poked his head inside. “Apologies, Lord Claudius. There has been a House Challenge.”

Claudius set me back on the bench and twisted toward the door. “In Von Drachenfeld? Against who?”

“Hades.”

“Who the hell is stupid enough to challenged Hades? He is ranked second.”

I cleared my throat. “That would be me.”

* * *