Right Turn

Okay.. just a try here.. this story has been on my mind a lot and I\'ve been reading some things and wishing I could read one like this.

So disclaimer! HUGE one. I\'m busy... I can\'t find time to write, let alone edit or just about anything else. And I\'m getting more and more busy. Therefore - this story is short, easy, and rather brainless. Don\'t blame me. Blame my job. One day, I\'d like to come back and re-write it. Make something more intense. Oh well. Who knows?

~*~**~*~ means past/present delineation

Summary
Ben has been in love (or lust) with newcomer Jack Ivenson. After kisses in the dark, anonymous letters, and internet talks, Ben can only hope that Jack means to be open and come out of the closet. Slash/Original/MM/Sap


Right Turn

Ben hops on the balls of his feet, watching the edge of his locker and fingering a note.

\'I\'m sorry. Forgive me for not listening. Meet me at your locker at the end of the day after practice.\'

It was written in blue BIC ink on lined paper that had been torn out of a spiral notebook. He\'d found it dropped into his locker. He knew who had written it. He\'d been waiting for a note like this for three and a half months, actually. Ever since Jack Ivenson had started to attend Libby Sr. High back in February.

~*~**~*~

Actually, it was February fourteenth exactly. The worst day in the world. Ben had come to school dressed in pure black with black eye liner, black mascara, hell, he\'d even grabbed a tube of his sister\'s black lipstick and slapped it on.

It was torture, going to school on days like that. Ben hated all of the gooey, happiness that exuded from the various couples walking the halls with their roses stuck in the plastic water capsules, valentine cards stuck in their packs, and wearing the oh so untrendy red as they walked around looking cute.

Barf ville.

He leaned his head against the locker and stared into it with a groan.

\"What is up now? Holy shit. You look like you\'ve run away and played with your mother\'s Sharpie, Ben-oh,\" a laugh broke out next to him and he shot his gaze to the side without moving his head to glare at the blonde girl with her bright blue eyes and her manicured fingers curled around her clarinet. Band was next. He wasn\'t sure he ever wanted to see a sheet of music again.

\"Claire.\"

\"Sure thing, sweetie. Hey, did you see the new guy? He was in my history class. You are going to drool, babes.\"

Claire was an oxymoron. She was cheerleader material; complete with winning smile, pigtails or whatever, and all athletic. She wore clothing that could only be described as pure prep, she spent her parent\'s money like water, and she got straight A\'s in French. She also was the first in their year to come out of the closet. It had been during their freshman year and she\'d been dating a senior girl over the summer. It was a big mistake, she said later. Not the coming out part. The dating someone that much older than her thing. It had hurt like hell when Mindy left for college. Claire still was gun shy around other girls and she was more than content hanging out with the only other outwardly content gay student in Libby High.

Ben laughed. He never did drool. He and Claire had different opinions on what was cute. That much was obvious. There was no bonding over cute boys here. But that was okay. They had more important things to bond over. Like Pizza Nero\'s Chicken Garlic Medium.

\"Let me get my trumpet.\"

\"Why are you still in band? You hate it.\"

\"Yeah?\" Ben leaned back, grabbed his trumpet and turned. \"It\'s better than having to take French.\" He nudged at her with his toe. It was something his mom did to him all the time and he kinda liked how he got to touch a friend and not be in their personal space, or his own. But then, him and his mom were a lot alike. \"Like someone who shall remain name - \" he stopped, staring, then in a breath, added, \"-less holy shit.\"

Claire dusted her clarinet case on her thigh and watched her friend turn into a human puddle. \"Toldja,\" he said in soft triumph.

That first look of Jack was burned into Ben\'s brain and he\'d take it out late at night sometimes, stare at it, and remember the painful constriction of his chest until he thought he would die from need, even months later. Jack Ivenson, walking down that hall, toward the music room, his guitar case slung over one shoulder. He walked like an acrobat, all smooth as silk and water, and he looked good enough to devour in a mere smattering of seconds. Every inch of his six foot frame was made for licking, kissing, suckling, - hell, just about anything you could imagine to do to something that perfect. From his long brown hair and brilliantly green eyes down to his hip hugging jeans and black tread emo shoes. The man was sex personified.

Of course, the downside to that first sighting of the indomitable Jack Ivenson, had been when Kyler Davis tried to ram Ben\'s locker closed; with Ben still standing in the way. Stars had doused the sight of gorgeous Jack Ivenson from his eyes and he\'d turned on Kyler with a hiss of anger. \"Watch where you\'re going, Papsmear!\"

The basket ball star was pissed only because he wanted Claire and he refused to believe she was gay and didn\'t give a shit about him. Kyler had been following Claire around for as long as Ben had known her, which had been since their freshmen year. And all this meant was, because it was common knowledge that Ben was gay and Kyler was a jock and a half, that number one on Kyler\'s list of people to be a shit to, was Ben.

Kyler had been hell for Ben. His own personal hell. The other boy took it upon himself to annoy, harangue, and otherwise make Ben as miserable as possible over the years. And for three of those years, Claire had stuck up for him against the torment. But something had happened the summer before their senior year. Claire and Kyler ended up working together down at the Davis Burgers which Kyler\'s parents owned and, to Ben\'s shock and dismay, had become friends.

Claire, lovely, marvelous, Claire -who was insane to like such a rat bastard of a jock - laughed instead of sticking up for Ben, and poked at Kyler. \"Stop Ky - you\'ll never get attention that way.\"

Kyler ignored Ben\'s acerbic remarks and then jerked his shoulder at the passing grecian god. \"Why do I think I\'ve got competition?\" His lips curled into the normal sarcastic grin that made Ben\'s hackles rise.

\"Fuck off, Davis,\" Ben hissed and stepped back, slamming his locker shut. \"Claire is gay. And I don\'t mean happy. Will you get a clue?\"

Claire, true to form, had added, \"Yep!\" in her chipper, bird like voice, \"Gayer\'n a hay ride in spring. C\'mon Ben. Don\'t show off your bad side to the new cutie. And Ky - don\'t be an ass. I want Ben to look cute for the new guy.\" She gave Kyler a shove and the taller boy caught her up in a hug.

Ben watched their interplay, wondering how in hell over one summer, the pair could have gone from enemies to almost good friends. He and Kyler managed to make something of a truce. Ben said nasty things under his breath to Kyler and the basketball head jerk slammed him into the lockers, made lewd comments to make Ben blush, and did everything he could to make Ben miserable short of dumping him head first into a trash can. Though the last wouldn\'t have been that hard. Kyler was incurably affected by giant\'s ass disease and Ben was Mr. Midget. Well, not really. But Ben was a book worm and while he was only about three inches shorter than Kyler by now (their first year, it had been almost painful the disparity in their heights as Kyler had grown almost as soon as a girl and Ben still hadn\'t gotten to his growth spurt just yet) he under-weighed the athletic boy by a good forty pounds of muscle.

But around Claire, when she didn\'t manage to keep them apart, the pair of them were almost decent to one another in that they kept the barbs and physical attacks to a minimum. Still, Ben had spent the entire walk to the band room glaring death arrows Ky\'s way. Bastard was too cool for band, but Claire was in band so the shit had taken it up. It sucked. It was the only room that Ky could match Ben\'s smarts in and so it was the only class they shared which meant it was the one hour out of the day Ben was stuck with having to put up with the smart assed jock.

Still, that Valentine\'s Day, Ben had spent the entire hour in a haze, watching as the new boy was introduced, told of staying in Chicago which seemed so exotic in comparison to Butt-fuck Arkansas, and then ended up sitting across the room from Ben so that their eyes met once in a while. And Ben discovered that those green eyes could make him forget even something as annoying and nasty smelling as Kyler Davis.

The first note came the next week.

Ben was dreaming about what he\'d do to introduce himself to Jack Ivenson, how he\'d go about it, and how he\'d drop the appropriate hints that he was more than interested in getting to know Jack Ivenson in all the right ways. Calculus II was going to be a pain in the ass and the book was so big that he couldn\'t lug it around with his english comp book from the class before. This meant he had to go back to his locker and more than likely, get treated to a damned smack by Kyler as the other guy went to his PE class where he tutored or some shit. Though how one could be a tutor for PE Ben had no idea.

The note though, fluttering to the ground, was something of a change from the norm and Ben had dropped, picked it up, and unfolded it carefully.

Blue ball point ink. It was a carefully penned missive but damned sweet.

\'I know you\'ve noticed me watching you across the room. It\'s forward and I\'m terribly sorry for not just coming to you, face to face. But I\'m scared shitless. You scare me, Benjamin. Your black eyes see right through me and I can\'t control myself around you. What would you do if I tried to say hi and ended up kissing you instead? So how about a first step? AIM: BestKSSD17 Tonight? Please don\'t say no.\'

It was like being wooed. It made everything romantic, hidden, secret. And Ben\'s knees felt like they\'d buckle. Jack was watching him TOO! Jack had noticed him too.

Ben had made it home in record time that afternoon. There hadn\'t been any time set on the paper and so he got on line the minute he got home. The name was inputted into his Trillian program and he waited, working on Brit Lit and the Ode to Haggis to keep his mind clear.

Of course, it just went to show you just how great his luck was in this world when his sister came home and had to do a report on Malaysia and needed to chat with a friend who was working with her on the project. The ensuing screaming match had him almost grounded, which would have been funny, being grounded at his age.

By five, he was off and though he tried, he couldn\'t get his sister off until one in the morning. Fingers itching, head aching, he turned on the chat program and went to get a Pepsi as it started up, feeling too nervous to stare at the twisting hourglass.

His heart in his throat, he settled down and realized with a start that the name he\'d put in from the paper was there. Licking his lips, this stomach feeling like ice, he swallowed and refused to throw up from sheer nervousness then grabbed his keyboard. Shoving the plastic onto his lap, he tried to work out a way to approach this - calmly.

ImKawaii: Hey. Wow. Sorry. Sis was all fuckin\' crazed. Couldn\'t get her off.

Then he waited, holding his breath as minutes ticked by. After what felt like forever, but was probably only like five minutes, he let out his breath in a heady gust of relief as a small chime announced that he was getting a reply.

BestKSSD17: Well, I had given up on you. I\'m glad you had a good excuse though.

Shit, he even typed nice! Ben felt his toes curl. He hunkered down and got to some serious connecting.

ImKawaii: Luv your screen name. And it was. I almost killed her. Probably gonna be stupid, but I got on like, the minute I got home! I can\'t believe you gave me that note and all that.
BestKSSD17: Oh? Surprised?
ImKawaii: Hell yeah! I mean, you always seem so distant. But that\'s cool. It\'s not very safe being gay. Or Bi.. or whatever you are.
BestKSSD17: LOL Gay is right.
ImKawaii: Sometimes it feels like I\'m the only one. And look at me. I\'m like totally taking over this. I can\'t tell you how scared stiff I am right now. I type a lot when I\'m nervous. Don\'t take this personal. It\'s not really you. It\'s that I get nervous and ... well, I\'m not always like this. I mean, irl? I don\'t talk that much. Well, not like this anyway. Or maybe I do. Shit. I don\'t know. I assure you though, I\'m not as dorky as I seem right now.
BestKSSD17: LOL I think it\'s cute.
ImKawaii: What a relief.
ImKawaii: I am sorry I was late.
BestKSSD17: No prob, hon.
ImKawaii: Shit! You called me hon. Damn. You sure you know me? You sure you\'re talking to the right person? This isn\'t Claire? Claire, if this is you, I\'ll pulverize your guts!
BestKSSD17: I swear I know exactly who I\'m talking to. ;)
ImKawaii: Thank heavens. Now - ummm.. what do you want to talk about? I mean, this is awkward and all. I want to make sure I\'m doing this right. You want to have lunch tomorrow?
ImKawaii: Oh shit, never mind. Forget the last.
ImKawaii: I\'m sorry! I\'m an idiot. I shot off without thinking. I told you I\'m nervous!
BestKSSD17: LOL It\'s okay. Really. I told you. It\'s cute.
ImKawaii: Shit, I feel like a loser.
ImKawaii: You sure it\'s okay? I mean - gack! I\'m not sure what I mean!
BestKSSD17: It\'s really late at night, you probably won\'t even remember this in the morning. Why not go to sleep and I\'ll meet you here later? Tomorrow?
ImKawaii: So no lunch? Don\'t let me push you. I just mean, since its out there. I know you\'re kinda running with a different crowd.
BestKSSD17: Ah. Yeah. Sorry. Not yet. Trust me?
BestKSSD17: I\'m feeling really weird about this.
ImKawaii: You\'re not outed?
BestKSSD17: Only to my closest friends. Well, and now to you.
ImKawaii: No worries. I can wait. It\'s not easy.
BestKSSD17: Thanks for understanding. Okay, night?
ImKawaii: Night. Tomorrow? We\'ll talk tomorrow? I\'m tired so I can be a little pushy. Please? Oh please?
BestKSSD17: LOL You bet. How could I say no?
BestKSSD17: I did wait for you for five hours you know.
BestKSSD17: And now that was stupid. Night.

Ben was typing in a response to that when he realized he was typing to someone offline.

He slept better that night than he had in months.