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rate_review Reviews

for The Man on the Clapham Omnivorebus

by JayDee

schedule February 6, 2026 at 12:00 AM

Well, I finished a large chunk of the thing I was working on, but rather than try and rush the second part, I need to let it develop as it will.  All of which means it's time I finished this story!


So you mention in the end comments that you're not fishing for compliments, and I will point out the one thing I worried about, and the one thing I took a little issue with, but overall this second chapter was a lot of fun!  It made me laugh a couple times, and it was also hot!


As before, the blend of humor and serious stuff catches me off guard.  Sarsa is in the middle of lamenting how Dylan was almost eaten alive and she just blows right through the fact that she got stalled because she was taking selfies with people who thought her demon costume was cool.


The bit where she heals his hands was where I got a little concerned.  A long time ago (it's shocking to think it's been more than seven years since I started posting WitS here on the site), you were writing one of the K-Team stories, I honestly don't remember which one, but I kind of nudged you toward acknowledging WitS in some way.  It was an emotionally driven action, and looking back on it it was selfish of me to do so.  There wasn't any one specific thing in this story that made me think of that, but something about the vibe of several spots made me worry that you were writing this a certain way because I'd pushed you into it years back.  I may be worrying about nothing, but I just wanted you to know: I want to make sure the act of writing is something that brings you joy, and that the final product makes you happy, without you worrying about if it makes ME happy.


“What kind of British gentleman ejaculates across a lady’s back, and in her mouth, without so much as a reciprocal fondle? I’ve a good mind to write a letter of complaint to Buckingham Palace.


...And of course, you may just be an untameable force of nature.  Yet ANOTHER moment that made me laugh, by the way.  And of course, we can't forget about:


“Oh, and did you remove her clothing, too? Roger her in the shrubbery, as you British say?”


“Heh, Ni- Uh, no, no British say that. I don’t think. Maybe in Kent.


Ni!  Also, I love that humor can sometimes be read entirely from the context.  Like, I laughed there, and I didn't even fully understand the Kent joke, just that it's got to be a British regional thing, but since I think every country has jokes like that, it still works!


The sex scene that follows is honestly pretty hot.  There are a few more moments of comedy throughout, like how Dylan expected Sarsa to be really weird between her legs, or how they irritate his roommates with how loud they're being, but there's some really good sexy stuff in there too.  I particularly like that even though you had her appearance shift slightly before the sex scene started (with her eyes changing), you kept some of the more nonhuman elements of Sarsa's character design, like her red skin, all through it.  It adds an element of exotic beauty to her that adds to the scene in my opinion.  Also, while this is less about her body and more about the binding, the biohazard tattoo is a cool look.


The one element of the story that I thought felt a little off, and it wasn't a huge problem or anything, was how quickly Dylan falls in love with Sarsa.  It felt a little bit fast to me.  Now, it can make sense in-universe, since there's this emotional transference that sometimes happens when you escape from a dangerous situation, or are rescued from one, and that can cause some powerful emotional stuff to happen, so we could be seeing that.  Also I fully acknowledge that it's a two-chapter story, so things do have to happen within the narrative window.


And the next morning Sarsa has achieved Shannon status!  She is human-passing, which on the one hand will make moving through the mundane world a lot easier, but will tragically cost her in future selfies.  In all seriousness, I love the detail that the change in appearance is a sort of self-actualization, so we see Sarsa differently because, as Kizzy points out, she's begun to forgive herself, and thus see HERSELF differently.


Also don't think I didn't notice that she went up a cup size and at least fifteen centimeters in the morning.  Again, never feel like you have to write this just for me...BUT I'M ALSO NOT GONNA PRETEND I HATE THE WELL-ENDOWED TALL-  Ahem.


Kizzy reached into an inside pocket of her suit, and took out a business card. She held it up briefly. Dylan made out “Ms Kizzy Dieudonné, K-Team Licensed Private Investigations Agency,”


I LITERALLY laughed out loud here.  Ok, I did that as a joke many years ago, as your author's note...uh...notes, but in-universe, this now makes me wonder whose idea it was.  I can see even odds on the girls, really.  Kizzy probably not, but Shannon's mischievous so she would enjoy the joke, and Lupa probably has a broad enough spread of pop culture references, and the sarcastic sense of humor, to go for something like this.  Kate's the wildcard, but it could have been her idea too.


And we end with...probably more noise complaints from Dylan's neighbors.  They can deal with it.


I know you said this isn't the best, but I still really enjoyed it.  I'm sorry it's only gotten reviews from Bronx and me so far, but I'm also glad you got the satisfaction of finishing it.  I've been absent from AFF for quite a while myself, but nonetheless, it's always wonderful to see something from you, so welcome back!

schedule January 12, 2026 at 12:00 AM
Welcome back!

Ah, poor Dylan. Nothing like London buses at night, eh?  "It wasn’t the most disturbing thing he’d ever seen on a London bus at night, but it had to be somewhere in the top five."  

I wonder why our first instinct when confronted with something that Absolutely Should Not Be Happening is to close our eyes, and hope it's going to be all better when we open them again. Granted, I've never had occasion to have a bus try to eat me, not even in London at night, after far too many pints of cider and increasing sloppy dart games. But, Dylan hoping he wasn't actually on a normal bus, screaming his head off and nearly naked? I felt for the poor bastard right then and there.

And then there was this bit:  

“Again! Mortal, ejaculate again!” 

“W-wha?”

“Come for me if you want to live!”

“I need… 15 – 20 minutes. Maybe a nap?”

I don't think I was supposed to laugh at Dylan, but seriously, I did. And then I laughed again...

“No. Mortal, I would fellate you. Do you consent?”

“HUH?”

The demon gestured exasperatedly. 

“Do you imagine we have eternity here, mortal? Please, if you would keep your blood in your veins, let me extract your semen.”  

Right. Probably not the worst offer ever made on London’s public transport network.

I honestly can't wait to see what happens now. Well done! 

schedule January 11, 2026 at 12:00 AM
So I originally wrote on the story promotion thread:

THE BEACONS ARE LIT!  JayDee calls for aid!

...And InBrightestDay shall answer.

However, since I realized that would cover your avatar with mine when people were looking at the forum, and I didn't want to do that (not to mention I didn't know whether or not it was good form to reply to someone's story promotion post), I deleted my post.  Just in case you get some kind of alert.

Anyway, moving on to the story...

I know you said at the end that you were concerned that this might not be the best entry for you to return to writing with, but two things.

First, if you haven't written in a while, don't let the fear of being a bit rusty keep you from getting back into the swing of it!

Second, I really like this one!

So, first, there's a fun sort of tonal dance you do here.  Your stories, particularly the ones starring the characters I often refer to as the K-Team, have a distinct sense of humor throughout, and I went in expecting that, but while it is present, the story actually shifts pretty smoothly between tones.  The very start is more or less serious, with hints of that humor, mostly in the way things are said (I found the bit about people who think they're Scottish because a relative ate a haggis once chuckle-worthy)...and of course the bit where Shannon defeated some kind of monster with a dildo.  I also like the idea that Dylan has seen footage of paranormal events and doesn't believe any of it, because that actually does make sense in the modern world, both sides of it.  On the one hand, with everyone holding a camera it's more likely weird things that would get recorded (barring a "doesn't show up on camera" sort of thing).  On the other hand, in a world awash in AI slop, it's easier now than ever, in fact kind of mandatory, to be incredibly skeptical of weird things you see on video.

Then after Dylan boards the bus, we shift into some legitimately effective horror.  I like the concept of the Omnivore Bus, and fittingly for how it likely came to be, it has the feel of something from a creepypasta or the SCP Foundation, a monstrous entity that exists inside our modern world, using our modern habits and technology to prey on unsuspecting humans, lurking just out of the corner of your eye.  The imagery of the adhesive/digestive flesh growing over the surfaces, and the mouths opening on it, after someone takes the bait is really creepy too.  The demon's entrance is pretty badass, clawing her way in through the window and cutting the tendrils apart.

And then the tones blend, with some humorous dialogue and reactions mixed into a serious situation.  I particularly like the exchange after the demon realizes she can use the semen as a distraction, first because the "potential life energy" idea is a cool spin on how blood magic tends to work, and second because the exchange made me laugh.  Paraphrased...

"I need you to do that again!"

"IT'S GONNA TAKE A BIT, OKAY?"

On that note, I haven't really thought of hair as being sexy before, but...it was pretty sexy here.  How well that worked makes me think that "hair play" has to be a thing.  In hindsight it does make sense, since the touch of hair is the same ultra-light touch you might get tracing a feather along someone's skin, and I know that's a thing.  The blowjob she uses to get Dylan to come again was hot too, and that's kind of impressive given the mingling of comedy and erotica is in general a sort of hit or miss phenomenon for me.

Oh, also:

"Come for me if you want to live!"

SHE SAID THE THING!

All in all, I'd need to go through a lot of your work again to say how well this compares to what you view as your best, but taken on its own merits, I think this was a great return to AFF, showcasing a lot of your talents in a single place!

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