"Powdered Sugar" by InvidiaRed
This story is full of references to things I'm not familar with: Kur, the messengers, the seven gates, Ningishzida, and so on. That basically made the story impossible to understand and, for me, to enjoy. Sorry.
Powdered Sugar
This was fun! It actually kind of reminds me of tcr's Halloween story, in that this is a world where characters from every religion/mythology interact. I liked how you just called Logan a giant in the beginning, and combined with the "Semper Fi" shirt I just assumed he was a Marine who was tall. It was only later, when Odin showed up as Santa and Logan bolted, that I realized that "giant" meant Jotun.
Speaking of Odin, I'm seriously impressed that Duncan could just shoo him out of the house like that. Kind of makes me wonder who or what Duncan is.
That actually brings me to the only part of the story I didn't understand. Duncan explains he doesn't like Christmas, and then this exchange happens about colonization, killing messengers, Duncan not liking Jesus but thinking that he's a being of hope, unlike his father (Duncan's father or God?), and it all really felt like there was a huge backstory here that I wasn't aware of. Does this take place in one of your other story universes?
Sorry if that sounded harshly critical. Overall, this was still quite a fun little read!
Powdered Sugar by InvidiaRed
Thought I might manage the fastest review! Ahh well.
I see you managed warm and fluffy with a couple of hard men after all! I mean, giants are tough no matter how bad the sweater, and scaring off that jolly visitor suggests Duncan is a bit hardcore too. When It started with the baking I did wonder if it might end up a bit like one of those recipe blogs, with the full cooking instructions around a long story. I may have been on too many recipe blogs.
I liked the interaction between Duncan and Logan especially. Warm fuzzy newlyweds having their first Christmas. Trusting/relying on each other. Sort of curious as to just how much bigger Logan is, like is penetrative sex an issue?
Duncan’s dislike of the whole Christian side of things is very clear. With “turkey shoot that was the end of the messengers." Would that be messengers as in angels, as in they’re all massacred in this setting? Reminds me a little of the end of the original Preacher comics, where the host got in the way of the Saint of Killers…
One bit I did have a little trouble following – it looks like a line may have been accidentally cut out?
Duncan hummed amused
the ice that cracked the entire engine block of Logan's commanding officer's vehicle. That, however, was entirely him. The ice had somehow just snaked in there and just ruined it. What a terrible thing to happen just when the insurance ran out.
I’m assuming it’s somehow related to a ice/frost giant story, but it feels like something is missing?
Aside from that, much more solid contribution than mine given we both had trouble doing something and an enjoyable read and nice call backs to the Halloween story!
Moonlit Snow by InBrightestDay
This one is also kinda spoilery.
Wait, is Elis a vampire? I know you liked that whole Let The Right One In vibe…
Just Kidding! Sometimes it’s hard to know where to start with a review. So, beautifully written and engaging story. You got the foreshadowing with that ‘joke’ technique, then Lady Aldreda’s obvious expectation of attack before it happened, the introduction of meanness about her condition and then meanness later on! You got the action scene and also the post-action and that wonderfully thoughtful ending which didn’t go the way I expected but absolutely lived up to the title.
I remember when you’d originally talked about people not being so keen on the condition and I wondered how it would work in the society with the religion, and the way you’ve handled it is really effective. Hopkin as the face of the uneducated type being blatant with it, while the more subtle nobles with one eye on church come up with insults that cut far more deeply than the eye-rolling response to the vampire gibe (…when a vampire turns a page… no I’ll stop). How you got it playing on her own insecurities like.
The fight with Hopkin and his bandits was cool – showing her tactical thought and also her advantage in having the plate armour; and the scene with the Serenity echoes still makes me chuckle. I feel like amateur banditry is going to be a career with a short lifespan in this setting, but I wondered if there was something driving them to it, failed harvest or similar? I wondered if the thought of relatives waiting back home was more of an influence for not taking the surviving pair for some justice at Mercy Harbor?
“Mercy?”
“Not for you, buddy. Up on the gallows.”
Other thoughts… the training at the start – I had no idea what Elis was doing wrong either, so got to find out at the same time as him. It certainly sounds plausible; the fighting/combat elements as a whole feel very like you’ve done your research. Some of us would just have something about him holding it by the blunt end, “Unlike finglerless Bob.”
The first mention of Fire Flowers – I have to admit, I half wondered if they were trading with Mushroom Kingdom, before I realised it was a pretty cool name for Fireworks. Some of the explosive displays can look very petal like!
Elis’ obvious attraction to Lady Aldreda is pretty clear throughout and pretty much in character for a 15 year old boy raging on hormones. That hope that she’ll see him as a manly man rather than a kid, and the embarrassment when he realises he’d taken the joke seriously comes across very realistic – although, fuck it, it did work! That inexperienced bandit got twatted by a kid with a pommel. I mean, I growing young adult with a pommel. I figure by the time he’s 20 there’s gonna be more of a distance between “mighty warrior” and “poor little’n rescued from goblins” and a relationship would feel like it was on a more equal basis.
…so who wins in a fight between Yua and Lady Aldreda?
Speechless By PlagueClover
SPOILERY REVIEW
My visitors arrived just before I got to start writing the review for this the other day, so I’ve re-read it now to refresh my mind. So, first time through I got the story that this dude has been abused by Father Mitchell, and after following him there’s the deserved revenge. The story really carries the Elliot’s POV well, with the little touches like his visceral reaction to the smell, the inability to enjoy connected music – even the little touch of not letting himself distracted by kids playing in the snow. Then there’s a definite air of mystery around the stranger, and the easy to draw conclusion that there’s something supernatural around him. Taken like that it seems fairly just revenge, even if it ain’t Elliot taking it.
Second time through I picked up on some other stuff and got to wondering if Elliot was really dangerously delusional and Father Mitchell had never done anything to him – I figured that could explain why he wasn’t recognised by Father Mitchell or seemingly anyone else at the church. The stranger who knows everything could then have been his hallucinatory dis-association with the actual act of taking revenge, and would explain how he knew what Elliot knows. If he is hallucinating, even an olfactory gingerbread could be a part of it. I dunno, it seemed like it could hold up pretty well as an interpretation!
Anyway, It’s great I’m not the only contributor of a more downbeat Christmas story and this was definitely one to read by candlelight on a cold winter’s night.
Memories
Wow. Seriously, that was amazing. You do a lot of oneshots, so for quite a while I just thought the old lady was a legitimately old lady, writing off the stones around the house and the feeling she gets while walking past them as being mental rather than magical. It was only when it was mentioned that she was a vampire that I realized who this was and it all made sense. It made me reread the stuff about her and her husband, about him choosing to live and therefore die. I had thought that was about him, say, having cancer and choosing not to get chemo or something, but then it becomes clear that he chose to stay human rather than let her turn him.
The bit with the angel on the bridge was really sweet, and of course her personality is pretty much what it always was (though maybe a bit less prone to dirty jokes), and the reference to the day that three once-fallen angels saved the world is one amazing hint at something massive to come. It made me wonder about their identities, since you have several demon characters, and that's leaving aside angels for whom the term "fallen" could be used more loosely.
I think that while some people might not understand what's going on here, it's a very rewarding experience for those who have followed your series with these characters. At least, that's how it was for me.
Finally, the ending made me tear up. It was really sweet, and I can't entirely put the feelings into words.
Thank you so much for sharing!
Speechless
I'm reminded of that exchange from the Jim Carrey version of The Grinch.
Cindy: "Santa, what's Christmas really about?"
Grinch: "Vengeance!"
Okay, so that wasn't exactly the tone of this piece, but it did spring to mind. Actually this whole thing is super creepy, going from a more standard revenge story to something far closer to horror as soon as the smiling man in the pew is introduced and:
“I could help you.” The guy’s murmur turned sinister. “I could give you exactly what your bloodthirsty little heart desires.”
Uh...moving on.
The way the story unfolds is extremely good, explaining gradually what exactly happened, how badly it's affected Elliot and really playing up the sheer creep factor of Father Mitchell's sexual predator thing, complete with keeping trophies (the photograph collection), and his unpleasant personal space invasions.
And then the smiling man returns and things change, leading to this interesting little exchange:
Elliot started at the sound of his name. It took him a moment longer to find his voice and say, “Who are you?”
“The only logical answer.”
Yeah...there are several potential answers, each varying degrees of creepy, all of which are logical depending on what kind of story this is. It's interesting to ponder.
So yeah, this was a heck of a creepy little Christmas story, moody and atmospheric. Well done!
"Moonlit Snow" by InBrightestDay
A lovely story, for so many reasons:
--You really seem to know your stuff regarding Renaissance weaponry. The sword training at the beginning seemed very realistic, and I liked the note that the mace was the one weapon the bandits carried that could injure Aldreda through her armor. Also, I've heard of the "unscrew the pommel and throw it" trick, but given that it renders your sword nearly useless, I guessed that Lady Aldreda told Elis about it just to tease him for wanting a shortcut in his training. So I LOLed when Elis actually did it anyway.
--The dialogue is well written. I LOLed at "Truly, an insult I have never heard before."
--The world-building is titrated just right. I also liked the unique bits, like the idea that vampires' night vision has a down side.
--The ending is so sweet it brought tears to my eyes.
Well done!
The Ninth Reindeer
Well, I promised myself I would read all the party stories, so it's time for me to read some furry porn!
I actually like all the world building you did here, with different roles for the different reindeer on the team, as well as mechanical details of the world, like the practice sleigh with motorized tracks on the bottom. It was also an interesting idea to mention how reindeer's vision extends into the ultraviolet portion of the spectrum, though I'll admit I don't think that'd be helpful at night, seeing as the primary source of UV light (the Sun) isn't visible and the UV light from stars is too faint. Still, it was a cool detail.
Another thing I liked was the use of the historical dates as references, like the Great Fog of '64, referencing the year the Rankin/Bass special came out, and then later a mention of '39, when the song was first recorded.
The fact that Rudy's grandfather was a Rudolph, implying that the name is sort of a legacy thing, does make me question if the other famous reindeer are legacies as well, like if this is the third Dasher or something.
One thing I will crticize, however, is that you totally stole a joke from me! When the orgy started, I was all set to make a joke about Rudolph being allowd to join in some reindeer games, and then...
“Actually,” Rudy replied, almost panting, “I didn’t get to, um, join in many reindeer games.”
Damnit, Glass!
The orgy scene itself was kinda hot, though I do think for me it was somewhat hampered by this (anthropomorphic animals, that is) not quite being my thing, so it kind of worked, but not quite as well as I'd imagine it will for other people.
I liked that you explained why all the workouts were necessary, as I had been wondering about that, but then you showed that time only actually freezes for Santa Claus, while for the reindeer that night takes days. It's a pretty cool idea.
Of course, then we get to Greta and Rudy's sex scene and...
“Mmm, nothing tastes quite like reindeer.”
When Rudy blanched, Greta added, “Oooh, sorry, that was insensitive. I know some humans eat reindeer.”
...I have several questions. Do humans eat anthropomorphic, sapient reindeer? Are only some reindeer anthropomorphic, while others are normal? If the latter is the case, does humanity or the world at large know about the existence of the anthropomorphic reindeer, or are they considered folkloric creatures like Santa himself?
Well, those questions aside, this was really well done, and thank you for sharing it!
Moonlight Snow
Pretty solid story telling with a holiday theme so you clearly did the excitement with honors. If I had written such piece I would probably not been able to avoid make the after the party scene into a sex scene. It is kind of classic setup, but for obvious reasons kind of cheap and probably not fitting your plans for characters. The scene you play out instead when they hold hands was probably my favorite part of the story.
Speaking about the characters the scene when he don't want to avoid asking what he did wrong because an adult would know what to correct reads to me as the prime example of him still being young.
As for the setting I found it very interesting and would love to read more stories using the same setting. Yet there is one name that rubbed me the wrong way...I cannot read the name Dalton without thinking on the Dalton brothers from Lucky Luke. These comic books is inspired by the real world criminal band formed by the Dalton family so it is kind of famous name. Not that this name lessened my enjoyment of the story, but I thought it worth to mention in case you want to avoid the possible same-name-issue.
Keep the good work! I want to read more about these characters.