Day of the Deadly by George Glass
Hey, gotta read one of them on October 31st!
Loved this one! Romance, action, actually convincing Spanish phrases! It’s got it all. The sex was hot and I can see how it totally could have incest overtones but actually came across as a guy having one last fling with his girl. I also loved all the Day of the Dead details- like, I had no idea about it being much more of a regional thing, but it totally makes sense because that’s pretty much the case for traditions all over.
Spoiler-heavy comments
I thought it was really cool how Enrique came back during that swig of his favorite drink and finished it off. It was just a great touch!
Cool ending. Gonna get unpleasant for that dude, although even there there’s a stab of sympathy for him since he was decent enough to back off when they claimed to be going to raise a glass.
Seemed like if you were gonna have revenge against a cartel this kind of way, getting in and out without being identified, was definitely the right way to do it. Back in the day Zorro needed to wear a mask too…
The oral sex was really fuckin’ hot, man.
Great contribution. Hell, all of them were!
Y’all did good this year folks.
Immunda
Your style of just one or two sentences per paragraph is unusual, but it didn't really bother me. Although some of the sentence fragments did (eg, "A disturbing warbling laugh").
I like the expression "Gods pass me by."
Lots of Halloween-appropriate imagery. I think the most vivid was the burnt baby crawling out of the hole, "gurgling happily as its blackened flesh crackled."
Immunda by InvidiaRed
Okay, so your style always takes me a moment to get used to. All the quick paragraphs and snaps from one action to the next. The pacing is lightning quick, but man... Okay, I shuddered. Quite a bit at the end there. Though, I kinda have to note that the moment you used 'Justicar' it suddenly became Mass Effect in my brain lol.
Anyway, this was violent and horrific and dark, and so very fucking twisted. Which is nice, you know, to get an expresso shot of some super messed up horror right before Halloween, so this does an excellent job of that. Well done!
What Nightmares May Come
Great opening image: the outline of the castle briefly illuminated by lightning. Which contrasts starkly with the next image, of Amicia wading through corpses. Especially the one “reaching for her with the shard of bone jutting from the stump of his forearm.” And then the bloodstain that was her mom...gyaah.
The other contrast I especially liked was the aged, cruel father and his mass-murdering daughter versus the innocent little sister. That tender moment at the end is the one bright spot against the bleakness, and that made the story special.
Immunda by InvidiaRed
…thought I might have some missionary position jokes but, holy fuck, another one making me Holy Fuck at he end.
That is one crapsack shithole of a nation you’ve got there, but an interesting one as well.
The kind of wham moment here after she thinks she’s cleansed the altar… that’s some fucking good horror that is. I feel bad for the baby like.
The ending was really grim. So good job on that, too! I sure as fuck didn’t see it coming. Y’all are taking the horror seriously this year!
The Halloween Pilot
Very imaginative. I like the Serbian setting, partly because I share the MCs' unfamiliarity with its culture, and partly because it seems like a dodgy place to shoot a sex-oriented reality TV show even without supernatural threats. There's a lot of good imagery, too, like the man bound so tightly to the cross that his flesh bulges around the cords. I didn't know a lot about East European folklore, so I was interested to look up the vila afterward and see how you'd used that in the piece. Nice work.
After Party
Well, I guess if you're a male sub who's into bondage, a spider woman is pretty much your perfect mate. I liked some of the phrasing in this story, like "alien sense of morality" and "aging with the grace of Hollywood royalty." And the sweetly romantic ending was a nice twist, considering that this story could just as easily have ended -- okay, could even more easily have ended -- with Cody as dinner.
After Party by InBrightestDay
Awww that was such a sweet, creepy, but mostly sweet... or mostly creepy? Halloween fic. You crafted it perfectly. In the sense that every word, every detail had a story-driving purpose. There were no info dumps, and yet there were brief glimpses into who these characters were, even who Yua was before she was Cody's wife.
So it started off super creepy. You painted the atmosphere well with all those spider webs. I loved that. It made the story feel so Halloweeny right from the start. The build up was tense. I usually keep notepad open to keep notes of my thoughts while I read a fic so I can smoosh em all together into a review when I'm done, but I was so absorbed, I didn't do that here. The sex was hot. Like surprisingly hot. Like I didn't expect to like it because, you know, you gotta have a decent command of nuance and porn writing skillz to make something like Yua hot to people who wouldn't normally find her hot, but you damn well did it.
Oh, and before I go, what a friggin waste of a good Rick Grimes costume!
What Nightmares May Come by SinfulWolf
It’s not all that often I finish a story and think “Holy Fuck,” but this was most definitely one of those occasions. I started reading it with a fairly humorous mental state, “Oh, haha, it’s an AFF story with a woman getting wet, well well!” and then she puts her foot down and… yup.
Then bleaker, and bleaker, and, that climb, that detailed clim… Holy Fuck.
I don’t know what happened there, but I can tell it was horrific. I come away with the impression that taking the action she did was fully justified, too.
Gotta feel, and feel bad, for the sister.
The ending though, in just a few words, pretty fuckin’ badass. Holy fuck though.
'nother few months of sleeping with the lights on then.
Death Always Wins
Perfect opening story for the collection. Nice and Halloweeny.
Trump as the antichrist. *snicker*
“Aces and eights wild.” Nice touch.
How the Hel did Hel get five aces? Does the Death Deck have more cards than a regular deck?
“Bloody slicked bones shone in the multicoloured lights of ringing slot machines." That is some great imagery right there.
Man, this Coco sequel got dark.
Obviously I'm kidding, but seriously, that idea's kind of stuck in my head now.
Cartel Member: "Who are you!?"
Héctor: "In the Land of the Dead, they call me..." *cocks gun dramatically* "Chorizo."
Okay, for real though, this was great. It's a nice little action story, and I especially loved this little moment:
“If this is going to work, I have to shoot one guard, then reload and shoot the other one before he sounds the alarm.”
How long will it take you to do that?
“We’re gonna find out.”
That is simultaneously funny and badass. Other moments I liked were the "You really need...to start...working out more." and the little moment right before the sex scene where Enrique realizes that he's missing something...
Speaking of which, that was an interesting take on the sex scene itself, sort of an M/F scene by way of F/F, and since brother and sister are sharing a body at the time...I don't know what you'd tag that.
Also, I love how creepy the ending is We don't have much time to get to know Hector Lopez, but we don't really need it. Dude's the leader of a murderous drug cartel, and he comes across as seriously intimidating, especially since earlier in the story it was rumored that he took a week to kill someone, and then we just get that reveal at the end that the rumors were true.
All in all, a seriously fun read. Thanks for sharing it!