What a sweet short story
Well, I've returned from the Place of No Internet, so...
No joke, when you said this was a story set in feudal Japan, and the title was Snow, literally my first thought was of the yuki-onna and the legend of the Snow Bride, so it was really cool to find out that was actually what you were writing about! I think you did a great job with both the eroticism and the character establishment considering the 500 word limit.
I do have a bit of a question, though. Given that Hisashi says his father was taken by a yuki-onna, and what's happening to him, are the snow women serving a kind of psychopomp role here, or is it that they just prey on humans, and these men simply chose to venture into their territory in the hopes of dying this way?
Love it and you have always been one of my faves.