schedule
June 18, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I am hooked on this first story of yours and hope to be able to read more of them in the future. I wish you could update sooner but will wait until Saturday. Great start and I love the characters.
schedule
June 16, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Okay, love the crap out of this. The characters have such defined personalities, which I always enjoy, and the writing is witty and enjoyable, which I always really, really enjoy. I hope you keep posting announcements on DeviantArt, because I don't know how this crazy machine works, so it would be nice to know I'll stay on top of the updates (because I tend to read things late at night and sometimes forget until a reminder pops up!).
Love, darling!
-Kuro
Love, darling!
-Kuro
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Awesome start.
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
It's an impressive first chapter no matter how you choose to look at it, but the way you portray Mark is what really makes me excited about this story! You might not be blind yourself, but I get the feeling that you know someone who is. That, or you've researched this like a madwoman!
I've had a lot of contact with people with different types of visual impairment, ranging from no sight at all from birth, to blind later in life, and most stages in between. And I really love how you make him a young man first, blind second. It's a big deal, sure, but you don't have to make it bigger than it is. You can still be independent and ambitious. Everyone uses different strategies to tackle everyday life and problems, if you're visually impaired you just use a different set, no biggie. I feel that you've really got that part down, and it's sooo good to see a blind person portrayed as normal. Not a victim, not a superhero. Just someone who gets up in the morning and does their thing. Who doesn't have to, or even wants to, depend on other people assisting with every little thing, or having people around them being overly impressed by them doing what's just their normal routine.
It's amazingly impressive how people learn to deal with all kinds of disabilities, but praising a grown person for being able to dress themselves in the morning is just patronizing.
I also love the relationship between Mark and Lancelot(cracked me up...). Their interactions made me think of a good friend of mine, he doesn't really need anyone else to come up with ideas like rollerskating or going into the moshpit at a concert, he just dives right in and does those kinds of things on his own initiative. And happens to be blind. During their teens some of his friends had quite a bit of Lance in them, too, so hilarity often ensued.
I'm really looking forward to reading more, and I hope you'll keep writing, you're doing great!
Och engelskan fixar du bättre än många som har det som modersmål, men det tror och hoppas jag att du redan vet. Så jävla bra jobbat! :)
I've had a lot of contact with people with different types of visual impairment, ranging from no sight at all from birth, to blind later in life, and most stages in between. And I really love how you make him a young man first, blind second. It's a big deal, sure, but you don't have to make it bigger than it is. You can still be independent and ambitious. Everyone uses different strategies to tackle everyday life and problems, if you're visually impaired you just use a different set, no biggie. I feel that you've really got that part down, and it's sooo good to see a blind person portrayed as normal. Not a victim, not a superhero. Just someone who gets up in the morning and does their thing. Who doesn't have to, or even wants to, depend on other people assisting with every little thing, or having people around them being overly impressed by them doing what's just their normal routine.
It's amazingly impressive how people learn to deal with all kinds of disabilities, but praising a grown person for being able to dress themselves in the morning is just patronizing.
I also love the relationship between Mark and Lancelot(cracked me up...). Their interactions made me think of a good friend of mine, he doesn't really need anyone else to come up with ideas like rollerskating or going into the moshpit at a concert, he just dives right in and does those kinds of things on his own initiative. And happens to be blind. During their teens some of his friends had quite a bit of Lance in them, too, so hilarity often ensued.
I'm really looking forward to reading more, and I hope you'll keep writing, you're doing great!
Och engelskan fixar du bättre än många som har det som modersmål, men det tror och hoppas jag att du redan vet. Så jävla bra jobbat! :)
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
This was BEAUTIFUL! Made my work day awsome, looking forward to more! :D
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Hmmm this seems promising. please update soon!
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
What? Your not blind, male or from New York?!? Well, I'll be damned...I would have never known....seriously. Good job and great characters so far. Can't wait to see more :)
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
You're new to the site? I could have sworn I saw your username reviewing stories. Hmm, oh well. At any rate, new or not, your story rocks girl! :) It's fantastic! I was cracking up through most of the chapter. Lance is a riot, Lancelot, hehe, too funny. And Mark just feeds off of Lance's funny quips. They're like Abbott and Costello. Ha, probably wayyyy before your time. Don't even know if they used to have that show in your country...
Speaking of which - your English writing is terrific! I would have never guessed you weren't a native English speaker. And so far so good with navigating around the city. And from midtown Manhattan to the Village, the way Mark travels, I'm not even sure if you can take just one bus to get there. Maybe also the train? Idk...but that doesn't matter. Just make sure if you have Mark going from the Village up to say the Bronx, you don't have him doing this in fifteen minutes. lol The traffic in the city is horrendous, grid-locked a lot of the times and people walking this way and that way, not paying any attention to the cars that are trying to drive around them. lol It's really a nightmare.
Anyway, it's an awesome story and I can't wait for chapter two! :)
Oh, you have great ideas about the technology for the visually impaired. There was this story I read on another site that was about a blind boy, well, high school age. He did go to a special school, but at home he had this high-tech computer and his phone was like Mark's; it had so many other features on it besides the phone part. It's really amazing what technology has done for people with disabilities. =) I can't remember if the story had any other cool techie things...but no matter. You've obviously done your research. :)
Great job Wynja! =)
Speaking of which - your English writing is terrific! I would have never guessed you weren't a native English speaker. And so far so good with navigating around the city. And from midtown Manhattan to the Village, the way Mark travels, I'm not even sure if you can take just one bus to get there. Maybe also the train? Idk...but that doesn't matter. Just make sure if you have Mark going from the Village up to say the Bronx, you don't have him doing this in fifteen minutes. lol The traffic in the city is horrendous, grid-locked a lot of the times and people walking this way and that way, not paying any attention to the cars that are trying to drive around them. lol It's really a nightmare.
Anyway, it's an awesome story and I can't wait for chapter two! :)
Oh, you have great ideas about the technology for the visually impaired. There was this story I read on another site that was about a blind boy, well, high school age. He did go to a special school, but at home he had this high-tech computer and his phone was like Mark's; it had so many other features on it besides the phone part. It's really amazing what technology has done for people with disabilities. =) I can't remember if the story had any other cool techie things...but no matter. You've obviously done your research. :)
Great job Wynja! =)
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
loved it! can't wait for the next chapter.
schedule
June 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Great start! I like the exchange between Lance(lot) and Mark, it's easy going and not forced. I'm also looking forward to more interaction between Mark and Jake. As for the blind aspect, I think you are handling it rather well, there are interesting perspectives that people with sight probably wouldn't pay much attention to yet it isn't cliche either.
Also, if you hadn't said that English isn't your fisrt language, I wouldn't have noticed. You have a great handle on it.
All in all, I'm excited to see where this story goes!
Also, if you hadn't said that English isn't your fisrt language, I wouldn't have noticed. You have a great handle on it.
All in all, I'm excited to see where this story goes!