rate_review Reviews

Looking forward to the party! The bed scene was really hot (hope they get some more time together sometime in the not too distant future...) I'm curious about how Ezra will react to Casey telling him about this morning.
Thank you for always updating so regularly!
Cheers.

very interesting concept. I'm extremely interested to see where this goes! great job!

so glad we finally got to meet the other HWs! Ezra's surprisingly patient with Alex. Great chapter.

I'm really curious about the "breaking" process - Blane makes it sound like a truly life-altering event, even for an A like Alex. The massage was hot!
Cheers.

Hmm. You have an interesting concept here, but it desperately needs to fleshed out a bit. The world in which the story is taking place does not come across as realistic. By dumping the reader into the action the way you have, you are basically saying that everything should be "normal" up to the point of the story starting--except that this is not the case as there are several things that have been accepted as "normal" by the characters that are so far removed from actual social norms as to be alien. (Which, by the by, may be from where you're getting the complaints about the confusing pronouns.)

Equality is a movement that has been gaining steam for half a century. The discovery of a gene being responsible for homosexuality and another one for submissiveness isn't going to change that. People would be up in arms against legislation to return to the days of slavery for any reason. How did the society in your story get to the point where that will be acceptable again? A protest against it would not be limited to just those it would affect--there will be sympathizers, and there would be a counter protest (West Borough isn't the only church who would be there) in favor of it.

Obviously, Blane would have different social norms than Alex, being raised in the Alpha subculture, but Alex is supposed to be Joe Normal, and he's your primary narrator. He's going to le normal guy in modern society, dealing with school and family and looking for a job. Also, if his dad is physically abusive, why is Alex still living with them at age twenty-three? Statistically speaking, those who are abused by their parents will attempt to escape said parents as soon as possible. So, why didn't he?

Anyway, I'm curious to see more.

~M. Silverwolf

Wow, just wow. Still Alex breaks my heart. Freedoms- ha he doesn't have any -

Maybe it is just me, but I still don't see that the difference was fully explained. Can you elaborate or is that coming later? Also, it seems way too soon for him to be falling under the thrall of Blane when they are taking all of his rights away. That is the sort of thing that should take a very long time if ever to accept... let alone forgive.

As I was thinking about this story, I realized what I thought would be really great. The alphas find out that they misunderstood the G14 gene. It actually makes the G-14 carriers super alphas when pushed into survival mode. So, by acting against the G14's the alphas push them into survival mode and the claiming alphas find themselves facing off against an alpha stronger and smarter than them. The alphas end up subservient to the super alphas. Boy, that seems like poetic justice to me. I love the idea.
Too bad I can't write it.

Yeah, like I said. I have the ability to resist your stories like they are dark chocolate and peanut butter milk shakes. I love it but more bitchy doctor lady please. I like her the best after Alex so far.

Great chapter. Can’t wait to meet the other HWs and see the dynamics between them!
Please update soon (even though you've practically just posted this chapter)!
Cheers.