rate_review Reviews

Hi, I am fairly new to this site and have only just started reading the stories here. I really like your story. I am bookmarking you as one of my favorite authors. I already adore Silas as one of the main characters and can't wait to find out what Amano plans to do with him and his crew. Update as soon as your time allows and please continue writing this.

The addition of 'little pirate' and 'you (damn) giant' takes away credibility to the dialogue, giving a childish undertone to the conversation (and Silas's personality. in this aspect it reminds me too much of Dara and The Selfish Dragon of The East ("damn you dragon"..).
You have really original ideas. So it's always interesting to see what you come up with for your new stories. However you have to work more on characterisation. changing the color of eyes and the lengh of hair doesn't create a new character. it's always hard to simulate a rude/ cautious/ angry/ easygoing/ reserved/ bashful/ diffident reaction in different ways and intensity for different characters since "we" are only "one" persone with "our" reactions. BUT since I see you have plenty of imagination: I believe you're up to the task. Try experimenting more. :)

Like it already!! :)

I am already hooked and love this new story of yours. I admit all of your stories are very entertaining to read and unique. I love your writing style and disagree with Myrt's review (no disrespect to Myrt just my own opinion) ** that using additions of 'little pirate' and 'you (damn) giant' takes away credibility to the dialogue, giving a childish undertone to the conversation ** I don't believe this is true. I do find reading your stories that the dialogue is somewhat different from what other authors use but that's what makes it so enjoyable to read. It's your own writing technique and fits the characters you have created in your imagination and the world they live in so special. I think you are doing an amazing job and Kylee is a great Beta to have. Please don't change it, your writing speaks all on it's own. ~~~ Katie ~~~~

@CelticThunderFan none taken. I'll say more, I'm partly in agreement with you. I'm not trying to change a writer's style: no writer should change his plot/writing style/characters to satisfy his readers. reviews are only intended as cause for reflection (when needed) and improvement (and the direction of this improvement is up to the writer).

What I wanted to do was to warn about the possibility of:
A) the stories to end up to resemble each other (even when they are very different) because of particular expressions frequently used that evoke wrong associations in the reader's mind. I could be wrong and you're entitled to disagree with me. However when I read the chapter I couldn't help but replaying the other story, thus not giving my full attention to the the story I was currently reading as it fully deserved.
B) The endearments are nice, though sometimes they can detract expressiveness to a scene. there is a difference between saying "Let.Me.Go." "Let me go!" "Let me go, you brute!" "Let me go, brute." it's not only matter of different style. the tone with which we imagine the scene in our mind changes. Changes the expression we attribute to the face. Changes the character of the one talking. So I'm not saying to ban endearments, only to evaluate if that's the effect sought out.
I wrote all this because I felt I needed to clarify myself. I didn't intend to sound harsh.

p.s. I like the idea of Amano having plans for Silas. I love this kind of plots.

Interesting. I liked this chapter and I'm ready to read more. Is Amano the person Silas met as a child?