rate_review Reviews

Strong start so far, but the flashbacks in the middle of each scene are distracting and by the time you finish reading them you get lost when time continues.

OMFG. I was so excited to see another story from you, and it is brilliant. Your writing is on point as usual, and I love love love all the characters. I love the friendship of Araz and Lukin. and Kailin adljkalkdj. I can't wait to read more! :) I am such a sucker for these types of stories, especially if they're as well-written as yours!

I'm really liking it so far. It is an interesting world. I also like the dynamic between Kai and Luk. I think there are enough explanations as is. The only thing I would perhaps like more would be for the plot to move faster. But I understand you are trying to build us up to something good so patience is the name of the game.

Well, since you're asking what I'm thinking of it, I thought why not share my thoughts with you.

So, I find the idea great and the way you're developing your characters makes them believable and likable. I appreciate the fact that you're differentiating between past and present and the only thing I would complain about is the fact you use no ' or ". It would make it much more reader-friendly if you used "..." to indicate dialogues and use the apostrophe in all short forms, like don't, isn't and so on. In most cases it's easy to figure out what you mean, but me being an English teacher, it makes me go 'argh, she's doing it again!'. Perhaps that's the way you planned to write the story, omitting ' and " but still, it ticks my inner grammar nazi off very much.

On the positive side, the word 'rek' is very much appreciated!

So, that said, I like the story very much and it's one of very few that I'm following at the moment (and actually commenting). Thank you for sharing it with us and good luck writing it. Also, hoping to share my opinion on later chapters with you.

teeta

Amazing story... Like all your stories... :))

Just found your fiction and I love it! Looking forward to the next chapter <3 kiss

I love it so much!!!!!!!! It's perfect. :D

yay another one! Hehe I knew when I saw this I would love it just because it was written by you! Very intriguing universe! And I really like Kailin and Lukin's relationship. I really feel for poor Lukin's seemingly unrequited love (for now at least) but it makes the story all the more interesting! Can't wait to see where you go with this! Good work on another one :)

I really like this new story but have to admit I am holding off on reading and reviewing it until you finish 'Trial 139C' which seems to be on hiatus. This story is very good so keep it up!

Oh, and I am very disappointed you haven't updated 'Ruin' in a very long time either. I wish you would at least try and update them once a month. Ok, sorry, don't mean to vent and appreciate you sharing whatever you write.