rate_review Reviews

I was finding myself to be interested in what the dynamic would be like when things to turn physical, but now I'm wondering if they will. Where have you gone this time? ;)

Just finished reading this story and can't wait for more chapters. Enjoyed it so far. Nice plot. Is the Carter family involved in shady dealings. Can't wait to see what her brother was killed for. Also never said why both parents died at the same time. Was their deaths on the shady side also. Only you as the writer knows and you will let us know with more releases. Please release more of this story soon.

more more more now now now :)

more!!!!!!

Nice edit, made the characters a little more dynamic, and made it easier to think about the plot. i think the lawyer is an interesting character, i'm not sure if i'm suppose to like her or not, i have a feeling she will come in handy now but later on i will have a reason not to like her. i might be wrong but i feel like there might have been something between Jayce and lawyer. This chapter was a good set up for whatever is to come i like the tone its setting, and your detail was pretty good i thought.

oo good hurry get the next one uo

I always like a good murder mystery, and this certainly has the makings of that, its a good set up so far. But one piece of hopefully constructive criticism would be that there is something missing and i think it is a slight lack in detail, the dialogue is good, but it reads more like a script and im not sure thats whats your aiming for so i went and read the other story connected to your name to compare the writing and i found that, that story has the little something this story is missing so i wonder if your writing this one this way intentionally to be add to the story or if your missing something that you clearly know how to add in, in other situations. But that's just my opinion and i dont mean it to sound harsh, i'll keep reading to see how it goes.

interesting, would love to see what happen next :D