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October 22, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Awesome start. Please go on writing and update soon!
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October 7, 2011 at 12:00 AM
You're off to a great start, there seems to be a good plot already in the making. It's also a bit of a new look at post apocalyptic fiction. I'm greatly looking forward to the next chapter. If you still need a beta I'd love to help.
bunky290@gmail.com
bunky290@gmail.com
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September 18, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Hi MissyMoon
I can clearly see that you've put a lot of time and effort into this chapter, unfortunately it's very hard to read... you seem to switch tense throughout, or the words in sentences aren't quite in the right order or sometimes you use a word that sounds or looks similar to the word you meant. I'm not saying this to be nasty or anything because you can speak English far better than I can speak a second language, it's just unfortunate that what I pointed out might put people off reading your story!
I do have some free time and if you want I don't mind switching some things around so it makes better sense...just give me an email =)
I hope that you don't take what I said as an insult because it really wasn't meant to be!
AlmightyGingerOne xxx
I can clearly see that you've put a lot of time and effort into this chapter, unfortunately it's very hard to read... you seem to switch tense throughout, or the words in sentences aren't quite in the right order or sometimes you use a word that sounds or looks similar to the word you meant. I'm not saying this to be nasty or anything because you can speak English far better than I can speak a second language, it's just unfortunate that what I pointed out might put people off reading your story!
I do have some free time and if you want I don't mind switching some things around so it makes better sense...just give me an email =)
I hope that you don't take what I said as an insult because it really wasn't meant to be!
AlmightyGingerOne xxx
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September 18, 2011 at 12:00 AM
0_o forgot to put my email...duurr! it's: idespisepink@msn.com