rate_review Reviews

Ha! You did it! Welcome to AFF Jon! :)

Hopefully you'll get tons of reviews for this awesomely hilarious story! :)

Liking it so far, curious to see him pay them back. Your writing has a nice flow to it and you know what to do with tenses and grammar 'n stuff (it is a little sad that this even deserves mention, but there you have it). My only complaint is the formatting, I understand you're doing this "start new paragraph indented (is that the right word?)" thing, but since you have a lot of paragraph breaks (and rightly so), half your story is halfway across the page.
As I said, though, that's just the formatting; no complaints about your story.