rate_review Reviews

Well this sure look like an interesting story!! I can`t wait to read more!!

Thanks A LOT for the story! Hopping there will be more soon! ^^ lol

This story sure has caught my eye :3 I look forward for more.

wow, this really caught my eyes!!! :D

Now I'm really curious to see who is this guy that have taken our prince?!! How they met? What has been going on between them? how he ran away?

Why he has been exiled? why she calls him traitor? so many questions in my mind ... and I can't wait to read more ...

please update soon, thanks ^_^

Okay...Where to begin? Well...You have a good premise. One that could quickly evolve into an excellent story. But here is the problem- As a reader I felt confused. There was too much tossed at me all at once. Terminology like Anon or Void... I had no idea what they meant. I'm assuming the Anon is a race of humanoid creatures and the Void is the power that they possess? But I could be wrong... I believe that if you take more time to build up your characters introduction it would be better for the story. For instance start off by making him introduce himself and his occupation in small details. Maybe you could use a flashback or a dream sequence? What is more dramatic? Me saying "I don't like to fly because I get air sick..." or "I don't like to fly because- because... it's my own damn business! Okay?!" The latter develops a sense of mystery. It gives the character intrigue. Hell! It keeps the reader coming back for more. Anyways I am in no way trying to be mean... I'm a new author myself... When I wrote my first chapter I wished I could have some feedback and creative criticism thrown my way... So I really hope this helps.

The idea seems to work, but the lack of details got me stumped. If you can answer the basics about your character and his motivations then your readers would be more forgiving. It all goes back to who, what, when,where and why. Please don't take this as an insult, because with a little more information this could be a wonderful story.

well, I like it. I like his scales and hair( the ears and fangs are boring)I have no idea what he is but I hope he's not Lucifer or prince of vampyres( rather pan or some mythological creature, even an alien would be better then cliche vampyre).
I liked the way he helped her.

This is really interesting - makes me want to know more about what everyone is!

I like it.I look forword to more.