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August 1, 2010 at 12:00 AM
shower sc enes are hawt. a lot.close ups of bodies shimmering in water are yummy.
So is the possiblility of slamming something into the wall, hehe.
And what will you do with Jude now?
So is the possiblility of slamming something into the wall, hehe.
And what will you do with Jude now?
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
OMG, I love it, love it! Please more. Must have more.:)
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
well, to be honest I like my sex scenes longer then this.Other then that you did a great job portraying the need to be fucked:)
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Woot dominant semes rock XD Very nice sex scene, very hot!
Though I would really love 1 more chapter atleast :) You know just to see the ex come walking in on the new lover and him XD
Though I would really love 1 more chapter atleast :) You know just to see the ex come walking in on the new lover and him XD
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I loved it! What a unique twist - the taller, buff guy is the bottom. I'm pretty particular about my couples (I like the conventional smaller guy on the bottom and a distinct top and bottom to the relationship) but every now and then a story like this gets to me. I can't wait to read more.
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Wow log on today and I get 2 chapters!
Chapter 2: Loved the aggressive talking but not too much. Makes it believable IMO. But I think since you are working on your SSS or your SSSS (slash sex scene skills) then you might want to work on the actual act. (I feel like I am directing a porn here) foreplay was good but the sex was what a paragraph. There is so much you can do (unless your trying to make it feel like a quickie)
Chapter 3: I like Lang's attitude – totally shows you that there is no norm mold you have to fit. Can't want for more!
I am glad your trying to make this story longer it only a story you can play with it all you want, work on your skills. Plus as one author here said once – this is just my crappy first draft, I can always go back and fix something later.
I think that what I like about writing – it one thing you really can f up cause we can go back and fix it easy as long as your will to work with it.
Chapter 2: Loved the aggressive talking but not too much. Makes it believable IMO. But I think since you are working on your SSS or your SSSS (slash sex scene skills) then you might want to work on the actual act. (I feel like I am directing a porn here) foreplay was good but the sex was what a paragraph. There is so much you can do (unless your trying to make it feel like a quickie)
Chapter 3: I like Lang's attitude – totally shows you that there is no norm mold you have to fit. Can't want for more!
I am glad your trying to make this story longer it only a story you can play with it all you want, work on your skills. Plus as one author here said once – this is just my crappy first draft, I can always go back and fix something later.
I think that what I like about writing – it one thing you really can f up cause we can go back and fix it easy as long as your will to work with it.
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
yay u did more
now lets run with that kick the muse and write some more this is awesome
now lets run with that kick the muse and write some more this is awesome
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Woot I sense drama :D I'm glad you decided to continue!
Plot? What do you need that for? :P As long as there is smex I'll stalk you XD
Plot? What do you need that for? :P As long as there is smex I'll stalk you XD
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
ahhhh you updated very quickly!!! I like this very much so far! The hot sex, no comment necessary! Thanks for trying w/ dirty talk. I just assumed there would be with the last line that Kasper said in chapter 1...it just gave me the impression that he was a talker. I like their awkward next morning and can't wait to see what happens next!
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July 30, 2010 at 12:00 AM
The first two chapters were very intriguing...and now what will happen when they wake up?I can't wait for the next chapter!