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August 1, 2010 at 12:00 AM
This is terrific, please continue.
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
muy bueno, muy hot, ana maria
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July 31, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Very nice, a bit short for my liking but hot none the less. For your first fic, this is very good so keep it up. Looking forward to your next chapter. :)
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July 27, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Not bad, the list idea is very intruiging. The only thing that got to me was the grammer, nothing major just where ever there was supposed to be a (') for word such as DIDN'T of COULDN'T there was these odd symbols so you might want to correct that. Other then that everything else was pretty well written and I actually want to read more of where she will go for the next location on her list. Hope your ok with me correcting you, just trying to help as one writer to another. Keep it up and I am looking forward to the next chapter.