rate_review Reviews

Oh my god! this story is so complicated! there are so many characters and side stories... but, it's a good story, and I like it, so I'll make my life a bit complicated and continue reading it. Good job!

Hello,
I was just wondering if english was not your first language. If it isint than your writing is good, if it is than you need a better beta.
I'm not trying to be mean but your verb agrement errors make it hard to understand your writing.
I am an english major and would love to beta for you. email me
Sasha

Great chapter. The one thing I wonder about is if Jeffery is Jamie's father, why did he leave Jamie alone to take care of himself. The whole issue of Jeffery dying is still a big mystery to me. I hope Leon will be able to save his son from being the pet of the king of Nary. Lovely story. I am looking forward to the next chapter.

Ok, why is it that Jamie does not have any body guards? How many times has he gotten into trouble because he was all alone? He needs a bodyguard! If he argues then give him a friend that turns out to be one in secret. Too much time, money and emotional torment is occurring because the royals think that they are safe from harm. Also what is with the security of the castle? If this is a sign of the state of the country, well, then it is a bad sign. I am sure that if other countries found out then it would be bad.

Anyway good update. I cannot wait for the next one.

I am so happy to find out that Conor was tricked into betraying Eli. I know those two still love each other. I actually think you did a very good job on the love scene. I like that Sebastian took the time to be gentle with Jamie. I hope Caleane and Devin will be able to recover their youth before the spell kills them. Very good chapter.

Poor Jamie and Sebastian are having a hard time getting to their wedding night. That torture session was quite horrible for Douglas. It seems that Sebastian is a combination of good and extremely evil at the same time. I think it is very cute that Devin and Caelane have turned into adults or pretty boys. Will they be able to turn back? I wonder if Alan and Arian are related somehow? I am eager to read the next chapter.

Wohoo! All caught up. So then who is this impostor that's now the step son of Jamie's dad? And is he wearing a mask to hide how he really looks like or does the impostor have some kind of connection to Sebastian? I love how this is going and I can't wait to read your next update! Great work!

I love the improvements in your writing. Considering that it hasn't been even half a year, you've done great in improving your writing as well as sentence structure. Keep up the great work and I hope to keep reading more from you.

"You are my angel." Hahahaha! Caelane's so cute! Poor Jamie being claimed by his half brother before he's even claimed by Sebastian.

I hope jamie will able to fight off the impostor. It would be so unfair if his wedding night was ruined. The poor boy deserves better than that. I also wonder what Conor is up to. Does he really want Eli, or is he trying to trick Eli again. I also loved your other story with the evil Vincent but I fell asleep before I could review it. Vincent sounds like he will be the worst villian ever. I am eager to read more.