rate_review Reviews

Very interesting story. Tristan has fallen in with a very kinky crowd. I am glad that he decided to go with hayden. They are very cute together.

That was great. Ive read fics by ppl who have been writing for years and they were'nt half as good as this. Right im off to read the other one now, keep up the good work xx

Hi Maxx! I'd email you, but your email is hidden so I'll leave a comment.

That was an interesting read. The dubiousness of the n/c sex was intriguing, yet hot. Like you mentioned in your A/N though, I agree and think Tristan does capitulate too quickly in to becoming Hayden's boyfriend. I guess you wanted it to be a one-shot, but this story I think could have really shined if it was spread out over a couple of a chapters. Also, they didn't have to necessarily have to jump in as boyfriends right away in this one-shot. They could have agreed to try and be friends, and then you could describe a series of one-shots as they grow closer and in to a relationship.

Also, I'm left a little confused as to why he didn't at least try and punch Hayden when he was let out of the straps or fight harder when he was confronted by Mitchell and Ryan in the beginning. From what you described of his background earlier in the story, these actions seem somewhat contrary to his "street training." I know he was tired of his gang life, so he was trying to change, but I don't think those instincts would have fallen that far to allow himself to get captured by only two guys, albeit one of them is taller than him, without doing more serious damage to one of them besides a kick to the chest. I understand that they were fighting in the dark, but that would mean the attackers had the same disadvantage of not being able to see. I would assume that since Tristan survived to leave/escape his gang, he would have some very good fighting skills.

I'm also quite amused that the whole thing started because of a daylight savings time error. I'm guessing that Tristan doesn't know how to use a phone or maybe Hayden's family doesn't own a phone because this whole thing would not have occurred if he had used one. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and guess that maybe Tristan doesn't have Hayden's number. :P

Overall, although I might have left a less than positive review, I did enjoy your story. Maybe I'm just completely over-thinking this story. Maybe all you were looking for in reviews were some quick one liners from saying that they did or didn't enjoy the story. I apologize for the length of my comment, but I've just always been a stickler for details, and I find in the stories I read on this site, the difference between a good story and a great story are those little tidbits that allow the reader to really immerse one's self. Everytime I hit one of those incongruities, it just jolts me back and prevents me from fully imagining the scene. Also, I think that this story and these characters have so much potential, I would be saddened to see it end here. Well, I'm going to read your other one shot about the bus ride. Take care and I'd love to hear more about these two characters! Have fun writing!

Awww, what a sweet story - I really enjoyed it. It was romantic and hot at the same time, plus I'm just very much into reading BDSM and M/M, so this story was perfect for me. Very much looking forward to reading more from you! Thanks a lot, you made my day ;-)

I loved this story. I would love to read even more about this couple if you ever decide to tell more of their story. I hope that you will also bring us more wonderful original stories like this in the future.

So HAWWWWWWWT. Seriously.... a bit speechless. I actually read this last night on my way to procrastinating for an exam I had today and I was just going to leave the above comment and say that I would leave something more intelligent later on (but my internet happily died), and now its later on and the fact that I've been thinking about this almost (please note the almost) standalone oneshot for most of today must mean I've really enjoyed it. I mean I get that its mainly just very hot man on man action but its definitely not overdone/cliched mess. You seriously hit all the right spots for me; good writing, interesting characters and somehow in a mainly sex dominated scene you managed to squeeze in some wry humour and well it was quite sweet by the end. I'm thinking you know very well how to play out a long, tantalising sex scene because you're a guy; not that female writers don't write good ones either but as a reader definitely felt pulled in and teased to the very end. I think ryan and mitch would also be interesting characters to follow; I like the dom/sub play. I hope you continue along this story line and we get to see more of the characters and the smex of course! Also noted that you like a lot of yaoi; I am interested in good yaoi fics if you have any time to rec that would be ace because I'm always hunting around for good ones/I'm assuming you have good taste since your writing quality would indicate so XD I'm babbling now and sleep deprived.

What about a sequel?

That was such an amusing story! It really made me laugh (in a good way). Oh, btw, no biggie, you wrote "your" when it should have been "you're".

You should continue w/this; it was really interesting and very original.

Wow... I just had an orgasm XD!
I love this story! It's detailed suck Tristen has a small peanut!
Hope you update soon.