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September 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I think it's a really good story with a lot of potential, and I would love to see more of it. The only thing I have to say is just watch for the spelling. I noticed a few things in there, but I know how it is when you're in a rush, and no one is perfect :)
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September 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Gah wot to do? I like this but i also like big bad wolf, could u not do them both? xx
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September 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I love how you finished this chapter! Lol, poor shocked Shiba. I feel bad for Himeko, prostitution sucks. I can totally see something happeneing between Shiba and Himeko though. I have a feeling I'm going to like the old man too. I'd love to read more of this!
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September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
How can you ask a question of which one to finish, I have read both and already love them. So my vote is finish them both in what ever order you see fit. I look forward to reading more of your work so keep on writing.
One of your new fans,
Loves to laugh :D
One of your new fans,
Loves to laugh :D
schedule
September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Well... I like this story too but I like BBW more ! ^^
Please update soon...
Please update soon...
schedule
September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I love big bad wolf so much, it would be to sad to not continue this story
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September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Well, I haven't read the other, but I always get bummed when an author doesn't finish a story. Of course I thought this one had potential, so maybe both! One word of advice, get a beta. There were some grammar mistakes and some odd wording, but otherwise good. Like I said, it has potential and good stories get overlooked because of bad grammar and not so surprisingly crappy story with perfect grammar actually get too much credit.
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September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I really like the start of this!!!! I hope you will contiue!!!! I will read you otherstory tomorrow!!!! See you!!!
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September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Interesting start to the story. A few typos, here and there: steering is stirring, some others I can't remember. One thing, tho: the character named Kike. You should seriously change that name. Kike is a slur word that a prejudiced, bigoted person would call a Jew. The K word is like the N word. You don't say it. So, it pretty much made me cringe. And it's offensive. I'm sure you had no idea. So, if you continue w/the story, please change his name. Thank you.
schedule
September 8, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I like it but I like the Big Bad Wolf more.