rate_review Reviews

Sounds like a good base for a story. Please do continue. I noticed some words that were either completely missed or were misspelled. If you are serious about your writing I would suggest finding a beta reader who will act like an editor to make sure you do not have any mistakes (or at least reduce the amount). I would do it but I have some troubles with some of the exact same things.

Hot story. I hope you continue with it, I'd really like to see more. I do have some constructive criticism though. There were quite a few errors I saw that were the wrong word but I knew what you were trying to say, like feeling instead of filling. Also, you switched from first person to third person, any particular reason for that? It was a little bit confusing (for me at least). If you'd like me to, I can beta for you. Just send me an email if you're interested. :-)