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for Unexpected

by kingston

schedule February 13, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Whoa this was hot! You really oughta write more of these stories!
person Magnus
schedule December 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I happen to like it. Though I think you could reinforce the girls' appearances more, instead of describing them once and then leaving their appearances at that. Use nice ways to remind us of who is doing what like 'the sexy red-head' instead of Alexis each time, though that is only one example of many possibilities.