rate_review Reviews

Hey, awesome story! I just had a few pointers on the Dutch used in the earlier chapters.
First, we Dutch have a fairly good grasp on English and don't squeeze in Dutch words when talking English - but it's your story and your character, so that was just a little bit of trivia. :p
As for the translations:
“Ja, ik kom! Iemand had beter dood zijn, of ik zweer...” This doesn't really translate to Dutch. "Ja, ik kom al! Als dit niet belangrijk genoeg is zal ik je..." Would be better. This translates roughly into: "Yeah, I'm coming! If this isn't important enough, I'll.."

“Wie de hel is het?!” would be better translated into "Wie de fuck is er?" Yeah, that's the f-word you see there. :p

For the rest, I had nothing to add, only that you're writing an awesome story and I want to be able to write to you. You have my salutations. ^^

I love this chapter, I have read it and re-read it a dozen times. I like how you manage to make Josh and Vic brothers *and* lovers. First they get into a brotherly spat and then they start making out. Josh is right, of course they have to talk, it's funny that cool-headed Vic was the first to jump in and to the hell with the consequences. Maybe because he has no prior sexual experience and ahem... First times can be overwhelming? Specially if you manage to get your hands on your first crush?

Josh looking out of the window in the bus, Vic doing the cleaning, both of them waiting for the microwave to ring... Those little details are what make stories real and your writing so good.

Also, this chapter was d*mned hot.

Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay! You finally updated! I was so anxious for it, you cannot even imagine. But it was worth the wait. The progress of the story is great, really genuine, I mean, one cannot jump directly in a taboo relationship. At any rate, am happy they're finally together, am curious what will happen next and looking forward to your update. Hugs, Scarlet
P.S. You should really consider a mailing list.

Oh, it was definately worth the wait! ^_^ It always is! XD And this was such an amazing chapter again!! ^_^ Please keep up the good work :D (And don't worry about how long it takes - Double Helix is so very worth waiting for!!!)

hey, i just read all the chapters at once and I'm SO addicted ! I want the next part now ! eh eh...I love them both and I'm glad you didn't rushed anything between them on this last chapter.Great work !

i'm so glad that their feelings are out in the open now... and thanks for the update! i'm sorry that you didn't get the 'soon' last time, so make sure you get it this time, alrighty? ;D
ASOTA

My first impulse is to say that I'm speechless, but the reality is that I have 10,000 thoughts running through my mind at this chapter. I've waited (yes, patiently) for an update and can honestly say it was worth every crestfallen minute when I'd bring up the site with crossed fingers, hoping against hope that there was one. It's obvious you put so much research into your writing to make it realistic. I've never read a story where I actually hunger to see the next words, wanting to read it fast, but forcing myself to go slowly and savor every word, every detail to make it last as long as possible. I don't know the extent of your studies, but you're a natural, pure and simple. You make something that is so taboo to many seem like the most normal thing in the world because the base, the foundation is what everyone is looking for-- love. The tug of the heart, the shared look that connects the soul, the breathless feeling of daring to hope that someone else craves you the way you crave them. It's one of the most amazing writing styles I've ever had the pleasure of reading. I loved the way you had them share their past thoughts, anguished moments and then finally realize they had come full circle back to the shared heart they had when they were younger. NO ONE could read this and not be cheering for them to just TALK and let their feelings for each other out. The way you spin out the story, letting us into their minds, their thoughts, pulling at the reader's heartstrings, alternately making me want to knock their heads together or just take their hands and place them in each others' so that they could feel what they needed to say to each other always leaves me with a smile that the guys are headed towards each other and a sad sigh that I've reached the end of the chapter. The kiss was perfect-- desperate yet yearning, feeding the need but clearly not quenching it. The ride home and the thoughts plaguing them, alternately feeling shame but still leaving hope. The way you had them at the microwave....lol...that was awesome...how many times have any of us stood there and stared at the item inside, a myriad of thoughts clouding our minds? The halting admittance from one that he could not regret the kiss...and the wings of hope fluttering from the others' heart....priceless! You are an artist of the rarest form. Thank you, again, for the dazzling gift of your words. Thank you for making my year begin so well. I look forward to the next update (no matter how long it takes, it will always be worth it) and to any and all works you will ever share with us. My friend, your talent is unbelievable and unsurpassed.

Oooh, I was happy about that update =)

YAAAAY! i did a mini dance when i saw you updated hehehe.
and you never disappoint. i loved this chapter, keeping a good balance between perspectives, and emotions. i'm now in love with BOTH of them; Vic is so cute right now and...VIRGINAL hahaha. and Josh is the ideal top, but theres still the option of reversal! gah, the way you juggle and balance everything is amazing, even with emotions like the angst, fluff, and hot passion~.
AND the confrontation scene kept me anxious. the talk afterwards was well delivered, without actually doing a dialogue that could have been too long, or cut too short to keep people's attention.
great great great....
and i'd be lying if i said i won't be checking everyday for the next update....especially with the promise of 'brotherly love' MUAHAHAHA *evil grin*

Looooove your story. I'm so happy to see a new chapter, I've been checking it over and over to see if something had been added.

Found a few mistakes, though, just stupid typos: “Achilles’ *heal*”, “Would they just ignore each other *form* now on?”, “They ran as *deeps* as his lust”

I also hope the next chapter is out before february, I love reading about the boys